Newsthump: Boris Johnson and Daily Telegraph to get married

[LeftishBrit]

Boris Johnson and The Daily Telegraph have announced over the weekend that they are engaged to be married.

The news will come as no surprise to avid readers of The Telegraph who will be well aware of just how much it is in love with Mr Johnson....



The editorial appeared alongside a photograph of The Telegraph’s entire staff in which Alison Pearson and Daniel Hannan could be seen openly weeping tears of joy and Charles Moore appeared to be frantically masturbating....



It is understood that The Sun, The Daily Mail and The Express have all spent the weekend crying their eyes out.

(More at link. As often, Newsthump is one of our most accurate news sources!)

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