General Discussion
In reply to the discussion: Six tips for men about "Compliments" [View all]MineralMan
(146,192 posts)of personal relationship. A business relationship doesn't permit personal comments, I think, on its own. Generally, the closer the relationship is, the more leeway in all sorts of comments.
I don't think it's all that difficult to manage, really. I know lots of people, but not that many in a way that would allow me to make any more than general comments. I might tell my wife's 22 year old niece, with whom I'm friendly that she looks nice if she's all dressed up for some occasion, but that's it. We often talk about how her life is going, but only in general terms. We're not close enough friends for any personal comments.
I'm friendly with people, but never flirty. That's not appropriate. That's not to say I can't be flirty, but only when flirting was initiated by the other person who I know very well, and only on a surface level.
I remember a flirting relationship I once had with a woman who was a member of a woodwind quintet I was in. Our friendly relationship gradually became flirty, and there's no question that we found each other attractive. At one point, we talked about it, and then scaled it back. It was fun, but not really appropriate to the situation. We remained good friends for years, and nothing untoward ever occurred between us. But we finally had to talk about it and deal with it. That's the only time I remember when a friendship started moving in that direction and then ended up returning to just a friendship.
I know I learned something from that. Flirting is dangerous stuff, or can be.