Top 10 Idiots

Top 10 Idiots's Journal

October 30, 2019

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #7-17: Butt Dialing For Jesus Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #7-17: Butt Dialing For Jesus Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! What’s up Oregon State? How you guys doing? You doing fucking good? Great! Yeah we had that little SNAFU in the scheduling last week which is why we got everyone goofed up. And the people responsible for that error have been sacked. Game 7 tonight guys. And we will get to Trump getting booed at Game 5 in a bit. Happy Halloween everybody!!! Tomorrow is officially the day known as All Hallows Eve. So of course we've decorated the set here with some festive Halloween flare. And my costume - I am going as Rudy Giuliani dressed as Dracula, because with a pair of fangs, he really could pass for Nosfeartu! Of course you know I always love to check and see what the ladies are going to be wearing for Halloween this year since ladies can go as the sexy whatever. For instance there's the sexy Pennywise costume. Then there's the sexy White Claw costume. I would veto this one, maybe don't go as booze, even if it is something trendy right now. Or you could go as sexy Black Mirror, because nothing screams "sexy" more than a blood and guts horror show! And speaking of horror, did you see season 3 of Stranger Things? Well you can go as sexy Scoops Ahoy from the ice cream parlor. Or how about the sexy Beyond Burger? I'm going to go out on a limb and say that food is not sexy. And no, I'm not going to say that there's absolutely no way that you can make Baby Shark sexy. Stop it. There was also sexy Mr. Rodgers and I'm kind of conflicted on this one. On one had it is very sexy and the model is hot. But on the other hand, it's Mr. Rodgers! Though my personal favorites are the sexy College Admissions Scandal costume - yeah nothing is hotter than bribing your way into a university! Or the sexy Popeye's Chicken Sandwich costume, which, just like the actual Popeye's Chicken Sandwich, is sold out everywhere. Will it cause a riot? Probably. OK that’s enough of the intro. We have a lot of idiocy to get to, but first John Oliver is back and he delves into Trump’s horrifying decision to pull out of Syria.

We live in an era of peak television but really folks, real life is that much crazier! In the first slot this week we’re going to do one of our favorite segments and that is People Who Somehow Got Elected, and this week we’re adding Florida Rep. Matt Gaetz (1) – whew, seriously Florida Man is a Congressional representative! In the second slot this week we’re still examining the fallout from the impeachment inquiry on Capitol Hill and the 47 republicans who decided to make complete asses of themselves. In the third slot this week is of course the guy who we currently call president Donald J. Trump (3) and he made a rare public appearance out in the wild people! Oh yeah he got booed and mocked relentlessly for it, so go figure! Taking the fourth slot this week is Rudy Giuliani (4). Yeah we have to talk about how he famously butt-dialed an MSNBC reporter and well real life is stranger than fiction folks! Taking the 5th slot this week is our weekly investigative piece Top 10 Investigates (5). While tech companies normally have a love – hate relationship with immigration, why is Amazon working with Trump’s I.C.E.? We will go beyond the headlines and reveal the extremely terrifying truth! In the sixth slot is our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in “Holy Shit”, and it’s finally here! The new Kanye West album “Jesus Is King” has landed, and our resident pastor is not impressed, and he will match Kanye’s music with an actual gospel choir! In slot #7 this week is an all new “Beating A Dead Horse” (7) and should you be allowed to enjoy superhero movies? A beef is brewing between old school directors like Martin Scorsese and new school directors like Marvel’s Jon Favreau. We will take sides and let you draw your own conclusions! In the #8 slot this week is Harvey Weinstein (8) and what the hell was he doing at a showcase for young actresses in New York? Go away Harvey! In the number 9 (NEIN!!!) slot this week is a brand new People Are Dumb (9) because of course they are! Finally this week in our 2020 voters’ guide Keeping Up With The Candidates, we are going to be taking a look at one of the most controversial policy issues of the campaign going forward and that is guns. And one candidate in particular, Beto O’Rourke, has taken the hardest stance on guns with his gun buyback program. But what is it? We will explain so you can explain it to your NRA loving relatives. Plus we’ve got some live music from the great Korn! Buy their new album “The Nothing” or you are no friend of this program! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]People Who Somehow Got Elected: Matt Gaetz
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Politicians at the state and local levels who are so toxic, you wonder how they’re able to get away with the things they get away with. This is:

This week: Florida representative Matt Gaetz. You might remember Rep. Gaetz from his ridiculous stunt last week where he lead 47 Congressional representatives to the basement of Capitol Hill where they just stood there and ate pizza until they were kicked out. But there’s more to Rep. Gaetz than that. He’s a man who uses lots of drama and hyperbole to prove his points, and is a staunch supporter of the Trump train. In fact here’s how toxic Matt Gaetz is – he actually attempted to defend white masculinity by quoting Lady Gaga. Wait, we thought white male conservatives hated Lady Gaga? We are getting mixed signals here.

Rep. Matt Gaetz appeared on Tucker Carlson Tonight Thursday evening to discuss identity, politics and, well, identity politics.

At issue? Media and political figures of oversimplified labeling Republican congress members who stormed Congressional hearings held in a secure SCIF as “white males.” Host Tucker Carlson introduced the segment with a montage of CNN’s Bianna Golydraga and Keith Boykin and MSNBC’s Donny Deutsch all noting the racial homogeneity.

But it was Rep. Jackie Speier’s similar comment on Morning Joe that the segment was truly pegged to, which Gaetz addressed in what became a viral exchange with MSNBC’s Hallie Jackson. Speiers called the GOP’s intrusion “a high school prank by a bunch of 50-year-old white men,” to which Gaetz took issue.

“Did she say we were a bunch of white men?” Gaetz asked. “What does the fact that we are white men have to do with our desire to represent the millions of constituents we serve?”

It was this exchange that Gaetz explained to Carlson, saying “I was really taken aback at the way that NBC News would choose to have a discussion about impeachment or transparency or Syria would be initially to try to put me on defense.”
https://www.mediaite.com/tv/flabbergasted-rep-matt-gaetz-defends-white-male-outrage-by-quoting-lady-gaga/

Just a little? It seems Rep. Gaetz has it in for identity politics, like a lot of people who have gone hardcore on the Trump train. But this might be one of the most ridiculous claims that he’s made yet – he claimed that he’s just like the leader of the Spartans in that movie “300”. Yes, he’s leading an army of deranged white men against some kind of… threat. What that is, we’re unclear of.

Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-FL) was full of himself after leading a group of Republicans to storm a secure conference room and hold hostage the Trump impeachment inquiry on Thursday.

Said Gaetz to TMZ: “We were like the 300s, standing in the breach to try to stop the radical left from storming over our democracy.”

Asked if Trump told him to do it, Gaetz replied, “No, I haven’t chatted with the president about it, though I suspect he might have a view he might want to share after today. … I love the president so much I may never love another president.”

Meanwhile, Seth Meyers had some choice words about Gaetz’s spectacle on Late Night.

Said Meyers: “I haven’t seen a group of white guys so angry since they found out their tickets to Don Henley are obstructed view. Looks like a protest outside a pharmacy that ran out of Viagra. They shouldn’t be at the Capital; they should be standing at a counter at McDonald’s demanding to see the manager.”
https://www.towleroad.com/2019/10/matt-gaetz-300/

Yes, what are they fighting, exactly? They already have two of the three major branches of government and controlled a third, up until last year when they didn’t. So what kind of war are they fighting? One where they don’t have to abide by this weird new thing called “rule of law”? Well when it comes to impeachment, people like Rep. Gaetz won’t back down in their quest to get absolute power, and it’s really starting to show what their true colors are.

Florida Congressman Matt Gaetz is demanding an end to the impeachment inquiry against President Donald Trump.

The conservative Florida lawmaker told a crowd of dozens outside of Democratic U.S. Rep. Donna Shalala’s Miami-area office on Friday that Republicans will “fight for Donald Trump” and do all that they can to prevent impeachment.

Gaetz criticized Shalala, calling her and several other Florida House Democrats who have supported moving forward with the inquiry hypocritical. He says they’re so caught up in investigations and impeachment that they’ve forgotten about their constituents.

The showing is part of a multi-million-dollar Republican National Committee-sponsored campaign designed to rally public support against the possible impeachment of the president.

Shalala’s staffers say the congresswoman wasn’t at her office at the time of rally.
https://miami.cbslocal.com/2019/10/11/florida-congressman-matt-gaetz-demands-end-impeachment-inquiry/

Well, they were given nothing all right. In fact, you want to know what this little stunt cost Rep. Gaetz besides his integrity? Well his district, which includes the Florida city of Pensacola, is not exactly what one would call “thrilled” by this little move.

Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-FL) was hit with a milkshake following a town hall event in Pensacola, Florida on Saturday. A video of the event appeared on Twitter, although it's unclear whether or not the drink actually hit the Congressman.

According to The Hill, 35-year-old Amanda Kondrat'yev was detained and no further incidents took place. It's interesting to note that Kondrat'yev ran for Gaetz's seat back in 2016.

"All people are invited to participate in our #OpenGaetz town hall events regardless of viewpoint. If anyone assaults anyone else, they can expect to be arrested and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law to ensure the security of all law-abiding participants. We continue to express our deep gratitude to the brave law enforcement officials who always keep our events and our community safe," his office said in a statement.

The event comes after Brexit Party leader Nigel Farage had a similar attack take place last week. "Milkshaking" is the new form of protest in Britain against "right wing" lawmakers. And it has apparently jumped the pond.
https://townhall.com/tipsheet/bethbaumann/2019/06/02/rep-matt-gaetz-gets-milkshaked-following-town-hall-event-n2547267

That’s right – he got hit with a milkshake when he returned to his hometown. Never mind that he’s actually pressing charges for this since he brought it on himself. That’s Florida Rep. Matt Gaetz, yet another toxic politician who we will add to the growing list of:

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[font size="8"]Congressional Republicans
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You know if there’s anyone who we need to build a wall around, it’s the 47 Congressional Republicans who thought it was a good idea to storm Capitol Hill and record the bipartisan Congressional impeachment inquiry against Trump. Yes, conservatives are so steeped in outrage and anger that when they read a sentence like that, they miss important keywords. You know, like “bipartisan” and “inquiry” – which is exactly what it is. Guys, there were people inside your own party at the hearing and it was perfectly within their right to be there! But you on the other hand, you were definitely not in your legal right to be there.

On Wednesday, Republican lawmakers committed a major breach of security guidelines when they carried cell phones as they tried to force their way into a secure room where a closed-door impeachment hearing with a Defense Department official was taking place.

At least one House member, Rep. Matt Gaetz of Florida, got inside the Sensitive Compartmented Information Facility (SCIF) in the basement of the House of Representatives. Despite strict rules barring all electronics inside such closed-off areas, Gaetz openly tweeted: "BREAKING: I led over 30 of my colleagues into the SCIF where Adam Schiff is holding secret impeachment depositions. Still inside—more details to come."

After the tweet came under criticism, Gaetz later tweeted “sent by staff.” It remained unclear how the representative was able to communicate with his members of his staff.

Rep. Mark Walker of North Carolina also issued a tweet that said he was "in the SCIF." A picture published by The New York Times showed a man identified as a House Republican holding up his phone as if taking pictures or video as he entered the secure room. A sign on the door of the room said, "Cameras and other recording devices prohibited without proper authorization." The room has lockers outside the doors where people are required to store electronics before entering.

Lawyers said bringing phones into the secure area was a potential felony. Security officials, meanwhile, stressed how damaging the move could be to national security. The SCIF is designed to prevent electronic eavesdropping so members of Congress can receive sensitive information that is often classified. Often, the materials in the room reveal sensitive operations or show how intelligence officers collect information on adversaries. SCIFs are carefully controlled to prevent electronic signals or electronic devices from leaving the rooms. Chief among these restrictions is no unauthorized electronic devices.
https://arstechnica.com/tech-policy/2019/10/republicans-storm-ultra-secure-scif-some-with-cellphones-blazing/

Seriously where’s a Yondr pouch when you need one? I mean come on we can’t take our cell phones into a Jack White concert but these idiots are taking theirs into an area where it clearly says “no cell phones allowed”? And you can’t say “reasons” as the answer. And this might be one of the stupidest political stunts in modern history. And no I’m not taking into account that time George Bush played guitar for Hurricane Katrina victims, either. Yeah that’s a thing that happened. But just how much did they put our security at risk?

It should go without saying: Don’t round up a bunch of your buddies and jostle your way into a highly secured government facility uninvited. But that's exactly what a group of Republican congressmen proudly did Wednesday morning.

“BREAKING,” representative Matt Gaetz (R–Florida) tweeted at 11:32 am, “I led over 30 of my colleagues into the SCIF where Adam Schiff is holding secret impeachment depositions.” Schiff is the head of the House Intelligence Committee, who has led the recent inquiry into President Trump’s Ukraine imbroglio. (Deputy assistant secretary of defense Laura Cooper was scheduled to give a deposition this morning.) But while Gaetz and his cohorts may have fancied themselves Parisians storming the Bastille of cloak-and-dagger bureaucracy, all they’ve really accomplished is the violation of some extremely basic tenets of national security.

Let’s start with the SCIF (pronounced skiff), since it’s an unfamiliar acronym for many. It stands for Sensitive Compartmented Information Facility. These are rooms that are outfitted to be effectively spyproof by conforming to a stringent list of security standards. There’s a SCIF at Mar-a-Lago, for instance, kitted out to accommodate briefings for Trump during his frequent southerly sojourns. Barack Obama traveled with a SCIF tent during his presidency that could be set up on short notice inside, say, a hotel room.

The requirements of a SCIF will also vary depending on its specific use case; whether sensitive materials will be stored there or simply discussed, for instance, makes a difference. But some standards apply universally, as you can see in these hefty guidelines produced by the Office of the Director of National Intelligence. They need radio frequency shielding, to prevent those signals going in or out. Their walls should be stuffed with sound-attenuation material and topped off with acoustic sealant. And any electronics inside a SCIF need to conform to the NSA’s TEMPEST specification, which details how to keep them safe from surveillance. This is just a sampling! But you get it by now. It’s a lot.
https://www.wired.com/story/republicans-storm-scif-national-security-nightmare/

Except you clearly don’t know the rules! You tried to spy on one of the few ultra secure spy proof rooms in the entire world! Let’s put it this way – it would be like going to a movie theater and intentionally paying money to see The Angry Birds Movie 2, and then using your cell phone to actually play Angry Birds, even though there’s signs everywhere telling you not to use your phone! Which is kind of ironic when you’re watching a movie that’s based on a cell phone game. Stay on target, stay on target! Back to the topic at hand, It’s made even worse when lawmakers shared audio of phone calls that they made. I mean really they made phone calls and ate pizza.

Rep. Alex Mooney (R-W.Va.) shared audio of a phone call he made from inside a secure room at the Capitol where Democrats were attempting to interview a witness as part of the impeachment inquiry into President Trump.

The interview was delayed for hours after a group of conservative Republican lawmakers, including Mooney, stormed into the room to protest what they say has been an unfair impeachment process.

The protest took place inside what's known as a SCIF — an acronym for sensitive compartmented information facility. Such rooms are used when secure, nationally sensitive information is to be shared or discussed.

During his call from the SCIF, the West Virginia lawmaker said he and other Republicans stormed the closed-door hearing because House Democrats “refuse to have a hearing in a transparent way for the people of West Virginia’s 2nd Congressional District can be aware of what’s going on.”
https://thehill.com/homenews/house/467168-gop-lawmaker-shares-audio-of-phone-call-he-made-from-highly-classified-scif

By the way let’s examine the fact that they just sat around and eat pizza for a minute. Does anyone else see the irony in this? They are sitting in a basement eating pizza, when they accused the democrats of running a sex ring inside a pizza parlor! You really can’t make this shit up. It’s like the end credits scene of the Avengers when they awkwardly sit around at a diner eating shawarma.

Today, a bunch of attention-starved GOP congressman crashed a closed impeachment deposition like the cast of Rent descending upon the Life Café after Maureen's show, except in this production of Rent everyone is irredeemable and annoying and the American people are the waiter who sings "No, please, no. Not tonight; can't have a scene."

With all the unearned confidence and mustache-twirling villainy of Sue Sylvester breaking up a Glee Club rehearsal right before Mercedes gives us life with a riff, a phalanx of representatives stormed a secure room in the Capitol known as the Sensitive Compartmented Information Facility, or um, SCIF, where three committees were about to hear testimony from Laura Cooper, an official overseeing U.S. policy regarding Ukraine. Gaetz frequently makes headlines by embarrassing himself, like he did recently when he said the impeachment proceedings were a kangaroo court and that Rep. Adam Schiff, who is chair of the House Intelligence Committee, is Captain Kangaroo, a fictional figure who would like very much to be left out of this narrative. I suppose you could summarize Gaetz's actions today as a "Tiff with Schiff in the SCIF" and that bit of rhyming is pretty much the only redeeming aspect of today's rift.

It's important to note that there are Republican representatives who sit on the committees involved with the impeachment depositions; the petulant politicians who crash the meeting today just aren't among them. Alexa, play "Uninvited" by Alanis Morissette. So, what Gaetz and the rest are trying to frame as some noble justice action is, in actuality, about as serious and as effective as the time Laura Loomer chained herself to the door of Twitter because they suspended her account. A bunch of men in suits figuratively yelling "unblock me, you cowards" at a closed door is not exactly the stuff of Profiles in Courage, is all I'm saying.
https://www.elle.com/culture/career-politics/a29565841/matt-gaetz-gop-impeachment-sit-in/

[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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So this happened:

Ha ha!!! We’ll get to Trump being booed at the World Series in a minute. But really he has not been having what one would call a banner week. The fallout from his horrifying decision to pull out of Syria has been backfiring on him hard. Then his own party makes complete asses of themselves at the closed door impeachment hearing. Then he gets booed at the World Series. But then we have to talk about his proposed wall. We haven’t talked about the wall for a while. But apparently Trump forgot that at least one border state exists and that is the state of New Mexico. Yes, they could seriously give New Mexico back to Mexico, and his fans wouldn’t care!

President Donald Trump said, “We’re building a wall in Colorado” when talking about border wall progress on Wednesday afternoon. Trump was speaking in Pittsburgh at the Shale Insight Conference when he made the comments.

“And we’re building a wall on the border of New Mexico and we’re building a wall in Colorado, we’re building a beautiful wall, a big one that really works that you can’t get over, you can’t get under and we’re building a wall in Texas. We’re not building a wall in Kansas but they get the benefit of the walls we just mentioned,” said Trump.

Work crews in South Texas are laying steel along the U.S.-Mexico border in preparation for the installation of new segments of border wall.

There are no reports of plans to build the border wall in Colorado. Gov. Jared Polis clapped back on Twitter, “Well, this is awkward… Colorado doesn’t border Mexico. Good thing Colorado now offers free full day kindergarten so our kids can learn basic geography.”

Rep. Diana DeGette responded on Twitter asking if New Mexico was going to pay for it.

Sen. Michael Bennet also responded on Twitter.
https://denver.cbslocal.com/2019/10/24/president-trump-border-wall-colorado-building/

Well it’s good to see that Trump is putting George Carlin’s plan of state prison farms into action, and it’s about damn time! I want to move to Colorado if that happens! At least then I won’t have to pay $14 for a beer. But alas, like any of the halfway decent ideas that Trump has had, this is surprisingly not a thing and he was “just joking”. Really? When has Trump ever joked about anything?

Geography has never been Donald Trump’s best subject. For example, the president attended a United Nations luncheon with African leaders a couple of years ago, at which he praised the health care system in Nambia. There is no such country.

A year later, the Republican told his foreign policy advisers that he knew Nepal and Bhutan were parts of India, despite the fact that neither is part of India. Trump has also reportedly struggled to understand different time zones.

But during remarks at a shale-energy conference in Pittsburgh yesterday, Trump’s difficulties with geography came into sharper focus.

“[W]e’re building a wall on the border of New Mexico, and we’re building a wall in Colorado. We’re building a beautiful wall, a big one that really works, that you can’t get over, you can’t get under. And we’re building a wall in Texas. And we’re not building a wall in Kansas, but they get the benefit of the walls that we just mentioned.”

There were a handful of problems with this, including the fact that Trump really isn’t making much progress when it comes to new border-barrier construction. The idea that people “can’t get over” the fences may not be altogether true, either.

But the funny part, of course, was the president’s assertion that he’s “building a wall in Colorado,” which is not a border state. (The fact that Trump’s audience cheered this comment was probably my favorite part of the story.) Sen. Pat Leahy (D-Vt.) had a little fun at the Republican’s expense, taking a Sharpie to a map of the United States to make Trump’s falsehood true.
http://www.msnbc.com/rachel-maddow-show/trump-tries-and-fails-explain-his-colorado-border-wall-comments

Except when you try to explain actual geography to Trump… ah, who am I kidding? There’s no one anywhere that will properly explain geography to Trump, they will just leave him to his own devices and that’s where it gets worse! But switching gears, we have to talk about his appearance at the World Series this week. Yes, the Astros trounced the Nationals. But that’s not before Trump got the welcoming that he very much deserved.

President Trump's low-profile appearance Sunday night at Game 5 of the World Series drew loud boos and jeers when he was introduced to the crowd. Wearing a dark suit and a tie, Mr. Trump arrived at Nationals Park just before the first pitch of the Houston Astros-Washington Nationals matchup.

Hours earlier, he had announced that U.S. forces had assaulted the hiding place of Islamic State leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, who was killed in the raid in northeast Syria. At the same time, a divisive impeachment inquiry into the president is underway in Congress.

Mr. Trump and first lady Melania Trump entered a lower-tier box to the left of home plate as the game was beginning. At that point, his presence hadn't yet been formally announced, but baseball fans in the section just below his suite turned to look toward the box as he arrived. Some waved at the president as he smiled and gave a thumbs-up.

At the end of the third inning, the president stood and waved to the crowd, and ballpark video screens carried a salute to U.S. service members that drew cheers throughout the stadium. When the video on the Jumbotron cut to the president and his entourage — which included a number of GOP lawmakers — and the loudspeakers announced the Trumps, cheers abruptly turned into a torrent of boos and heckling from what sounded like a majority of the crowd. Chants of "Lock him up!" broke out in some sections, including one below where the president was sitting.
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/trump-booed-world-series-lock-him-up-chant-break-out-during-game-5-washington-nationals-stadium-pa/

Oh that felt good! Can we play the Ha Ha sound effect again? Oh man that was sweet. I really want someone to do that the next time Trump decides that he needs to make a public appearance outside of his MAGA hate rallies! Well that’s what happens when you don’t screen crowds before you make an appearance. Did you not read your own Art Of The Deal?

If President Donald Trump is impeached, convicted, and removed from office, or defeated in next year’s election, the political backdrop of his downfall is unlikely to be better dramatized than it was last night during Game 5 of the World Series.

Trump was in the stands with his wife, Melania, having announced that very morning that U.S. Special Forces had killed the ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi in a daring raid. It wouldn’t have shocked me if that inspired a warm reception from the crowd. Remember when Osama bin Laden’s killing was announced? I was in Austin, Texas, where people were whooping and cheering in bars. President Barack Obama could have drawn applause anywhere in the United States that night.

And the crowd at Nationals Park in Washington, D.C., was applauding last night when the big screen in right-center field showed uniformed U.S. military personnel.

But when the image changed to Donald and Melania in the stands, there was a sudden shift. The crowd booed. Loudly. Then fans in some sections of the stadium began to chant “Lock him up,” repurposing the rallying cry that Trump supporters have directed at Hillary Clinton since the 2016 presidential campaign.
https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2019/10/president-trumps-world-series-error/600901/

[font size="8"]Rudy Giuliani
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Just when you think real life can’t get any crazier, there is Rudy Giuliani. I mean when I saw this story break last week I didn’t know whether to laugh at the sheer stupidity or bang my head against the wall, or do both. Here’s my whole thing – I’m not a New Yorker but I have always viewed Giuliani as a creepy weirdo. But it seems like he’s an off the rails batshit crazy unhinged creepy weirdo in the dumpster fire that is the Donald J. Trump administration. But this is one of those things that you really just can’t make up no matter how hard you try. Like I don’t think even the best SNL writers could come up with a scenario where the president’s lawyer butt dials a reporter for a rival network and can be heard bragging about the need to trash their political opponents. Not one.

Late in the night Oct. 16, Rudy Giuliani made a phone call to this reporter.

The fact that Giuliani was reaching out wasn't remarkable. He and the reporter had spoken earlier that evening for a story about his ties to a fringe Iranian opposition group.

But this call, it would soon become clear, wasn't a typical case of a source following up with a reporter.

The call came in at 11:07 p.m. and went to voicemail; the reporter was asleep.

The next morning, a message exactly three minutes long was sitting in the reporter's voicemail. In the recording, the words tumbling out of Giuliani's mouth were not directed at the reporter. He was speaking to someone else, someone in the same room..
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/politics-news/rudy-giuliani-butt-dials-nbc-reporter-heard-discussing-need-cash-n1071901

OK I have many questions about this. I mean who butt dials anymore? Doesn’t Giuliani have a passcode and face lock on his phone? Or does he pull a Kanye and put the lock code on his phone as 123456 (see: Idiots #5-16 )? Yeah it’s probably the latter especially since his boss, @realDonaldTrump, tweeted this:

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/1187861209942495234

Yeah no they clearly don’t give a shit about cyber security. Or even keeping up with current technology, for that matter. But the butt dialing isn’t the worst thing to happen to Trump’s lawyer this week.

Lev Parnas, the indicted associate of Rudy Giuliani, can be questioned under oath in the coming weeks about financial transfers he made to Republican political campaigns, a federal judge in Florida ordered Tuesday.

The court order comes as questions swirl around Parnas' close ties to Giuliani, efforts to insert himself into Ukrainian interests and Republican politics, and as a criminal proceeding against him continues in New York. The testimony he must provide in Florida could shed new light on the scope of his payments to American campaigns and other Trump-connected entities, as well as other financial dealings.

His defense attorney did not immediately respond to a request for comment.

The development comes as part of a civil court proceeding and is separate from the criminal charges in New York.

Parnas is accused in a New York federal court of conspiracy and campaign finance-related violations and has pleaded not guilty to his criminal charges. The Manhattan federal prosecutors continue to consider new charges related to him, though the parameters of their investigation are unknown.
https://www.cnn.com/2019/10/29/politics/lev-parnas-republican-rudy-giuliani/index.html

Wait wait wait wait wait wait wait. Wait. Wait. If I’m extrapolating this correctly, this means that Giuliani can be indicted by Congress for any illegal money transfers he might be responsible for that might be directly related to Trump? Then you don’t want to get caught on phone begging for cash, that will almost certainly be a one way ticket to indict town.

Rudy Giuliani’s cell phone accidentally called an NBC News reporter on October 16, leaving a voicemail in which he was clearly heard discussing the kingdom of Bahrain and saying, “The problem is we need some money.”

The call came in at 11:07 p.m. while reporter Rich Schapiro was asleep. In the audio, portions of which were published by NBC News on Friday, Giuliani can be heard saying “Charles would have a hard time with a fraud case, because he didn’t do any due diligence.” It’s unclear who Charles is.

Giuliani can also be heard telling an unidentified person “Tomorrow I gotta get you to get on Bahrain,” then telling the person they need to contact another person named Robert because “the problem is we need some money. We need a few hundred thousand.”

Also Read: Joe Biden Campaign to TV Networks: Stop Booking Rudy Giuliani

The other person in the conversation was largely inaudible, though he does say “if you want options, I got options, I got options,” to which Giuliani replies “yeah give me options, yeah.”

It wasn’t even the first time the former New York City mayor accidentally called Schapiro and left a voicemail. The previous butt-dial and subsequent voicemail happened on Sept. 28 at 3:37 p.m. In that message, Giuliani railed against the Biden family, accusing former vice president Joe Biden of “trading in on his public office since he was a senator” and son Hunter Biden of trying to get high-profile jobs because of his father’s position.
https://ca.style.yahoo.com/rudy-giuliani-butt-dials-nbc-235222510.html

To be fair, let’s say that Rudy is butt-dialing for Jesus. That’s about the best way I can put this ridiculous stunt. Because just about anything sounds better when you add “For Jesus” at the end of it. Taking a shit, for Jesus! Hit and run for Jesus! Stealing a million dollars, for Jesus! Murder, for Jesus! OK that escalated quickly! But let’s not overlook the severity of the situation here – butt dials can cost you deeply! That should be the take away for this week!

The New York Times’ Annie Karni laughed at “walking conflict” Rudy Giuliani, calling it “farcical” that’s he back in the news because he butt-dialed a reporter for NBC News.

Karni was appearing on MSNBC’s Up Saturday morning, where moderator David Gura asked her “Rudy Giuliani is still proclaimed by this president to be his personal attorney. How should we view that? How should we listen to that tape in light of the role he’s playing in this administration today?” after playing audio of Giuliani talking about needing money.

Karni said it should be viewed with “great humor.”

“Even when Giuliani is sidelined from television and not supposed to be speaking for the president and a reporter doesn’t pick up the phone because he’s sleeping, you still get a three minute voicemail from Giuliani talking about how he needs money. It’s almost farcical,” she said.
https://www.mediaite.com/tv/new-york-times-annie-karni-chuckles-at-rudy-giuliani-butt-dialing-reporter-its-almost-farcical/

[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Amazon Vs ICE
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It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates!

This week, an unprecedented boycott took place when nearly 700 musicians and bands decided to boycott Amazon over their decision to work with I.C.E. and Homeland Security. Technology companies have had a love – hate relationship with immigration. But Amazon has long had a process of hiring workers not from the USA. And some feel that working with I.C.E. sends the wrong message – and it does especially with what the Trump administration has been doing with I.C.E. since he was inaugurated in 2017. Don’t have time to get into that, so Google it. But what was the spark that started the boycott against the world’s largest tech company? It was quite simply a powder keg that finally exploded.

More than 400 artists pledged to boycott Amazon events and partnerships unless the company cuts ties with U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE).

The open letter, titled “No Music for ICE” was published late Wednesday by the group Fight for the Future.

“We will not allow Amazon to exploit our creativity to promote its brand while it enables attacks on immigrants, communities of color, workers, and local economies. We call on all artists who believe in basic rights and human dignity to join us,” they write.

The 475 artists call on Amazon to “terminate existing contracts with military, law enforcement, and government agencies,” including ICE, Customs and Border Protection and the Office of Refugee Resettlement, that the musicians said “commit human rights abuses.”

They also call on Amazon to “reject future engagements” with the “aforementioned bad actors.”

The musicians also urge Amazon to stop providing cloud services and other tools to organizations "that power the US government’s deportation machine.”
https://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/467397-hundreds-of-artists-pledge-to-boycott-amazon-in-no-music-for

Yes, boycotting the entire network is almost always the answer! Because that has worked out so well in the past right? Right. In fact the list keeps growing by the day, and it started as a response to backlash from Amazon’s corporate sponsored Intersect Music Festival. Like we need another festival to add to the 3,000 that are held every year. The decision to boycott started with Amazon’s partnership with a controversial data services provider.

Several artists added additional words of support. “My music peers’ collective outrage at the announcement of Amazon’s Intersect festival made several of us realize how desperately we need to formalize our concerns,” wrote Sadie Dupuis of Speedy Ortiz.

“The powers that be at Amazon have been relentless in their pursuit to make this company indispensable to the ways many of us live—and even with an understanding of Amazon’s complicity and centrality in reinforcing various structures of oppression, it often may feel too difficult to evade their reach,” wrote Ithaca rapper Sammus. “This is one way that we can and must push back. We have to draw lines and this is one I am choosing to draw because nobody should ever have to live under the kind terrorism that ICE has inflicted upon countless immigrant communities.”

Last week, the Black Madonna was released from her contract to perform at Intersect after expressing outrage at the company’s involvement. She claimed that Amazon was not listed on any of the festival’s initial offers or paperwork that she received. Intersect’s lineup includes Foo Fighters, Beck, Kacey Musgraves, Anderson .Paak, Spoon, Flying Lotus, JPEGMAFIA, Jamie xx, and more.

Amazon has been criticized—including by its own employees—for its work with the data company Palantir, which runs its software on Amazon Web Services (AWS) and has more than $150 million in contracts with Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE). AWS also hosts the Department of Homeland Security’s vast database of biometric and biographic data collected by the Transportation Security Administration (TSA), Customs and Border Protection (CBP), and Secret Service. Last year, The Verge reported that as of 2017, AWS controlled 40 percent of the cloud services market.
https://pitchfork.com/news/more-than-150-musicians-boycott-amazon-festivals-over-ice-contracts/

Yes it would probably be best if your boycott started at the top. By the way you know that we live in a culture now where if you don’t like something, the first thing that you do is cancel it. Call for someone to be fired. Call the show off. And many other things that could be handled as a result of someone doing something that you don’t like. In fact Amazon isn’t the only one who has been a victim of our newfound cancel culture. Take a look at what happened when a Texas taco truck was caught serving ICE workers.

A local taco truck has found itself stuck in the middle of an incendiary culture war that has resulted in an apology, an apology for the apology, and between ongoing social media criticism and a loss of business, no clear end in sight.

The ordeal began on October 23, when Lloyd Taco, a Buffalo-based company that owns four food trucks and two brick-and-mortar restaurants, tweeted that one of its food trucks would be parked outside the Department of Homeland Security in Batavia, also known as the Buffalo Federal Detention Facility, which is run by ICE — a fact that some Twitter users picked up on, leading to critical responses, with some pointing out the irony of offering tacos outside a federal agency that detains immigrants, some of them from Mexico.

The next day, Lloyd tweeted an apology and promised to donate all of the sales from October 23 to an organization supporting migrant rights. “There is no excuse for what happened and we have already begun to update our internal procedures to ensure future taco truck stops and events align with our company’s values,” the company wrote in a statement.

Then an even bigger backlash to the original backlash started: some people, including Republican office-holders and ICE itself, interpreted the apology as “a slap against police and law enforcement,” Buffalo News reports. At a news conference held on October 28, Lloyd co-founder Pete Cimino apologized for the initial apology, calling that decision “hastily made” and overly reactive to criticism.
https://www.eater.com/2019/10/29/20938152/lloyd-taco-food-truck-buffalo-ny-controversy-ice-migrant-backlash

Hey turn the show back on! Yup, the show is over. Cancelled. You are gone. And then the taco truck was forced to apologize because it was forced to apologize. This is a circular firing squad gone berserk. But that said, are technology companies ever neutral or exempt from participating in a complicated argument like this? The answer is very complex and you can’t answer an easy yes or no, but for now consider Amazon to be on the wrong side when it comes to the immigration debate.

Apple stumbled into a new line of business this week: NBA heat shield. On Wednesday, the company booted from its App Store an app called HKmap.live, which protesters in Hong Kong had been using to track police amid the pro-democracy demonstrations against the Chinese government that have engulfed the city for months. In the few days that HKmap.live had been available, it became the most downloaded travel app in Hong Kong, according to the New York Times—until, reportedly, authorities in the special administrative region and Chinese state media complained. The company said it reversed the app’s initial approval because it “violates our guidelines and local laws,” since it was “being used maliciously to target individual officers for violence and to victimize individuals and property where no police are present.”

Here’s what HKmap.live actually did: The map app aggregated available data from other social media sources, didn’t show specific locations of individual officers, and had a time lag before data showed up on the app, according to blogger and activist Maciej Ceglowski, who has been in Hong Kong for months. Charles Mok, a legislator in Hong Kong, condemned Apple’s decision, pointing out that the app was being used by residents hoping to avoid tear gas and said that some residents were sharing information about police activity to avoid harassment. Facebook, Twitter, and other iOS apps that are available through the App Store in Hong Kong allow users to do the same thing, Mok said in a letter to Apple CEO Tim Cook, arguing that Apple’s rationale was spurious and unevenly applied.
https://slate.com/technology/2019/10/apple-chinese-government-microsoft-amazon-ice.html

That’s it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Gather around my fair brothers and sisters of Oregon State! It’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate, for the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it’s time to remind you that the holiest among us are the most full of:

My fair congregation!!! You know it is All Hallows Eve here at the Holy Church Of The Top 10. And that is why I am dressed as SAYTAN! Because it's always the one you least expect! That time is finally here when we can all marvel at the musical genius that is Kanye West! Did I say musical genius? Well, does have an ego as big as the unholy Dark One, whose name shall not be spoken in my church! But that said as religious disciples, can you really enjoy his new gospel rap album “Jesus Is King” with a straight face? I ask you because it is all over the news and the radio because Kanye has seen the light! Is he really that religious? Or did he see the Blues Brothers and was convinced that he was on a mission from GAWD? Well I ask you this question because the good LAWRD JAYSUS has always claimed that he is against false prophets and people with gigantic egos the size of Texas. Well, at least he does in our Good Book! Not so sure about Kanye!

Over the years, it has become more difficult to dismiss the distractions surrounding Kanye West in favor of focusing exclusively on his music. This is, in part, because his actions are upsetting, but also because the music he’s released in the past half-decade hasn’t lived up to the rest of his catalog.

The Life of Pablo had its moments, but it was, at that point in his career, far and away the least consistent album. Two years later, the MAGA-infused controversy surrounding 2018’s Ye was even more difficult to ignore because the music was also disappointing. With Kanye making increasingly alienating music, casual fans had a way out and die-hards had a lot of critical thinking to avoid.

Then, Sunday Services started popping up at the top of 2019. A few months later, we got an Easter Sunday Service at Coachella, which seemed oddly underwhelming, considering the absolute spectacle of the arrangement. It became clear that this Christian bent would permeate Kanye’s recorded music, and a new litany of questions popped up: Was this an overcorrection after years of headlines about the 13th Amendment, Trump, and slavery? Or was this a genuine move towards seeking forgiveness, and a concerted effort to simply be better? With Kanye, it’s never black and white. And his new album, Jesus Is King, only leaves us with more questions.

There’s a contingent of former fans who have been able to quit him outright, but Kanye West remains difficult to ignore completely. You could discard some of the nonsense he’s released over the past few years, because it’s exactly that, but Jesus Is King is an improvement. At only 27 minutes, it doesn’t give Kanye a lot of time to fail. The religious theme provides him with something to focus on lyrically, which was lacking on Ye, and the beats are strong. Right now, JIK sounds like a good Kanye West album, although that’s partially because Ye is bad and TLOP is inconsistent. Play this after something like My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy, and it pales in comparison. He’s certainly moved the goalposts.
https://www.complex.com/music/2019/10/kanye-west-jesus-is-king-review

Uh………… what??? That seems like a very odd combination of clothing to wear to the gymnasium, Kanye. But let’s ask other rappers what they think of JAYSUS Is King! But the question that I bring to you, my fair congregation, is how can this be a gospel album? It literally has about 3 seconds of actual gospel music or is it a rap album that calls itself a gospel album? Nevertheless, we’ve got an actual gospel choir right in front of you! Remember when Kanye used to be credible?

As a public figure, Kanye West sometimes seems to change course every other day. But where his musical output is concerned, his most consequential turning point came 10 years ago, by way of two very different albums.

First was the 2008 release of 808s and Heartbreak -- recorded after the unexpected death of West's mother — whose icy, digital sheen made a surprising break from his earlier soul-sample style of production. Seen as an aberration at the time, 808s is now recognized as a key influence on modern hip-hop's minimalist sound, and suggested the trajectory of West's career would be different from those of the golden-era rap acts who had originally inspired him.

Then came 808s' follow-up in 2010, My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy. In contrast to its predecessor, this album was a maximalist affair, full of lush production and grandiose stylistic gestures. It also marked West's turn towards releasing albums as full-scale spectacles that leveraged his celebrity status — by then always awash in controversy — and worked as one arm of a multi-industry Kanye West business complex that has since become valued at over a billion dollars.

In the decade since, no other pop music figure has drawn such rubbernecking fascination, especially once West discovered the power of Twitter as an unmediated outlet for self-expression. He inspires so much public contemplation and condemnation that the release of each new album feels like a performance unto itself, even before the public has heard a note of the music.
https://www.npr.org/2019/10/28/774137186/kanye-wests-jesus-is-king-like-its-creator-asks-a-little-too-much-of-us

That’s deep, man. So deep! But really in all the hoopla surrounding this album, I mean come on it’s barely an album at 27 minutes. We have to cut through the BS and tell you some of the crazier bits of interviews from a man who now calls himself a holy man of GAWD. But here’s the thing – can you merge two genres that go together like olive oil and vinegar? Well many have tried – some have succeeded and many have failed. But unlike Kanye, none have dared called themselves the greatest genius who’s ever lived in history. I think the good LAWRD JAYSUS would have a problem with that!

Late one night last month, in anticipation of Kanye West’s ninth major-label release, which was reportedly due in just a few hours (it was ultimately stalled by delays, and didn’t arrive until last Friday), Twitter user @FrankieComedian posted an image to his timeline. “Me waiting for Kanye West’s album,” he wrote, adding the hashtag #jesusisking, the title of the rapper’s hotly awaited first gospel project. The general sentiment of the image was explicit, the clearest distillation of the difficult fascination fans continue to have with West. In it, a man slowly applies clown makeup to his face; by 12:01 am he is fully outfitted in a wig and red nose—just in time to stream the album on Spotify or Apple Music.

I was suddenly full of uncontrollable laughter because its truth cut like dog teeth to the bone. Were we clowns for continuing to engage with a man who readily sold self-interest as love, who preached open-mindedness but often supported people who practiced division? Yes. Once again, the joke was on us.

No one wanted to believe it. In the lead-up to Jesus Is King, and even before, fans thought maybe, in spite of his faults, West’s music could absolve his mania, even as he courted public contempt with a kind of paradoxical glee. He’d vocalized support for President Trump, called for the annulment of the 13th Amendment, championed conservative firebrand Alex Jones, and likened slavery to “a choice,” all while urging us to be more accepting of “free thinkers.” But, even as critics and fans—myself included—were quick to cancel him, they held out hope. But absolution never came. It didn’t on ye—his derisory album from last year on which mental health and family life were anchoring themes—and it doesn’t on the facile Jesus Is King, a patchy, sometimes remarkable, mostly unexceptional interpretation of the black gospel tradition.
https://www.wired.com/story/kanye-west-jesus-is-king/

Really is he the best or is the good LAWRD JAYSUS the best? Or is our amazing choir the best? Well we may revisit this album in a few weeks. Mass has ended may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]Beating A Dead Horse: Scorsese Vs MCU
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All right we’re going to settle this debate once and for all, like men. Is it OK to enjoy superhero movie franchises? I ask because the Marvel Cinematic Universe, commonly known as the MCU, is under attack by what some would call actual film makers. But wait – didn’t Black Panther get nominated for Best Picture last year? And couldn’t Robert Downey Jr get nominated for his last performance as Iron Man in Avengers: Endgame? Spoiler alert! Oh come on, stop booing! It made $5 billion and everyone who’s a fan has seen it by now! So just like Captain America: Civil War, whose side are you on? Are you on the side of world famous directors like Francis Ford Coppola who make huge, grandiose films like the Godfather? Or are you the kind of brainless idiot who enjoys watching Spiderman destroy the Green Goblin for the 100th time? By the way, that’s the first time I’ve ever used the word “grandiose” in a sentence! Well before you answer, I like a bit of both. In fact I want to see a crossover flick where Iron Man takes on the Godfather and pounds Don Vito into submission on the day of his daughters’ wedding! Thank you to the graphics department! Of course we could just watch Kill Bill, and that would be the best of both worlds. Or we could participate in endless debate.

If you want to shoot holes in the comments that Martin Scorsese and Francis Ford Coppola made recently about Marvel movies (Scorsese: “That’s not cinema”; Coppola: “Martin was being kind when he said it wasn’t cinema. He didn’t say it was despicable, which is what I say”), then go right ahead, because they’ve practically handed you the gun and the bullets. The most obvious bullet is the one that automatically damns you in this day and age: These guys are old (Scorsese is about to turn 77, Coppola is now 80), and you could argue that their grand objection to the blockbuster films of today boils down to the fact that the world is no longer the world they grew up in, or the one that existed when they were at their creative apex as filmmakers, so they’re unhappy about it.

The whole “It’s not the way it was in the good old days!” song and dance, which I’m personally quite familiar with (since my set-in-his-ways father did it every day), is one that we tend to think of as just another cranky version of “Get off my lawn!” And the public discourse today overflows with it. America, in case you hadn’t heard, is going down the drain, and it’s all the fault of … the millennials! The Trump voters! The corporations who control everything! The Internet! The fake news! The video games! The greedy corrupt Hollywood that elevated fantasy over reality! Please, God, bring it back to the way it used to be!

Much of the knee-jerk condemnation of the Scorsese v Marvel crusade, as expressed on social media, has come down to a visceral rejection of the-damning-of-the-new-by-those-who-are-old. Beyond that, though, the Scorsese argument that Marvel movies aren’t cinema is riddled with irony, if not flat-out contradiction, when you take a closer look at the messenger.
https://variety.com/2019/film/news/martin-scorsese-francis-ford-coppola-right-about-marvel-1203381088/

Seriously, Scorsese is a vintage Ford and a 12 gauge shotgun away from going full Gran Torino! You damn kids! Support real cinema! Now before you Marvel fans get your discount Chinese made knock off Hulk costumes in a wad, you should be aware that there is some truth to what Mr. Scorsese is saying about these movies. For every Godfather, there’s about 1,000 sequels, remakes and reboots of the same shit you’ve been seeing since 1978. But you know what? Why don’t we ask an actual MCU director for his take on the subject!

It comes after Ken Loach became the latest name to criticise the Marvel Cinematic Universe yesterday (October 22), calling the films “boring and cynical”.

Favreau spoke to CNBC on Tuesday, and said that he believes Scorsese and Coppola are allowed to express their opinion, no matter what it is.

“These two guys are my heroes, and they have earned the right to express their opinions,” the director, who appeared in the MCU as Happy Hogan for over a decade, said.

“I wouldn’t be doing what I’m doing if they didn’t carve the way. They served as a source of inspiration, you can go all the way back to Swingers. They can express whatever opinion they like.”

The recent slew of comments from both sides on the Marvel franchise began when Scorsese labelled the MCU “not cinema” in a recent interview, likening the films to “theme parks”.

Coppola went even further, calling the films “despicable” and even saying that Scorsese was “kind” in his judgement of the films.
https://www.nme.com/news/film/jon-favreau-says-martin-scorsese-francis-ford-coppola-earned-right-criticise-marvel-2559996

OK Jon Favreau, challenge accepted! And like I said before, there’s only a handful of Tarantinos, Scorseses, Coppolas, Kubricks, and Del Torros of the world. Fine they can criticize art all they want since they’re actual artists. But too often we’re reminded that Hollywood is just a business, and like any other business, they have to make money. Which means that you will sit through 15 Avengers movies and like it, or else!

Benedict Cumberbatch is a surprise supporter of the criticism being levied against Marvel films by other film directors.

Days after Disney CEO Bob Iger defended the blockbuster films that comprise the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Cumberbatch – who plays Doctor Strange – said he “agrees” that there should not be ”one king to rule them all”.

“I know there’s been a lot of debate recently with some very fine filmmakers coming to the fore saying these film franchises are taking over everything,” he told SiriusXM’s The Jenny McCarthy Show.

“I agree, we don’t want one king to rule it all and have a monopoly and all that, and it’s hopefully not the case and we should really look into continuing to support auteur filmmakers at every level.”

Francis Ford Coppola, director of The Godfather and Apocalypse Now, joined Martin Scorsese in his criticism of Marvel films, with the former telling Agence France-Presse: “When [Martin] says that the Marvel pictures are not cinema, he’s right because we expect to learn something from cinema, we expect to gain something, some enlightenment, some knowledge, some inspiration.

He went on to call superhero films “despicable”. Other directors to have criticised Marvel include Ken Loach and Pedro Almodóvar.
https://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/films/news/benedict-cumberbatch-marvel-monopoly-doctor-strange-martin-scorsese-coppola-mcu-a9169041.html

Hey wait a minute, Benedict Cumberbatch! You are Dr. Strange, you are a super hero! An actual super hero criticizing super hero movies? I mean what is this? Some sort of weird new meta philosophy that I’m not aware of? I mean regardless of whether or not you watch super hero flicks or you want to give them the cement shoes, let’s face it, this is the 21st century. We’ve all become content consumers! And whether or not we prefer actual art, or mass produced fillers, that’s our damn preference! And come on, Scorsese, you’re on Netflix! Which side are you on? How about we ask another super hero!

MCU stalwart Paul Rudd has responded to Martin Scorsese’s recent comments that Marvel movies “are not cinema” in a new interview with NME.

The legendary filmmaker made headlines earlier this month when he made disparaging comments about Marvel’s run of comic book films.

“Honestly, the closest I can think of them, as well made as they are, with actors doing the best they can under the circumstances, is theme parks,” Scorsese said. “It isn’t the cinema of human beings trying to convey emotional, psychological experiences to another human being.”

When asked by NME what he makes of the acclaimed director’s recent statement, Rudd countered: “I love Martin Scorsese, I love his movies, I can’t wait to see The Irishman.”
https://www.nme.com/news/film/paul-rudd-martin-scorsese-ant-man-2556880

[font size="8"]NO!: Go Away Harvey Weinstein

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The #MeToo movement has made for some very strange political bedfellows. I mean who knew that someone like Kevin Spacey was such a creepy weirdo or that one of the biggest producers in Hollywood, Harvey Weinstein, would go down in flames? Now this brings up an interesting debate – if you encounter your abuser in public, should you make a scene out of it? Well in a world where our natural human senses of logic and irony are thrown out the window, Harvey Weinstein showed up at a showcase in New York City for young actresses. And if you’re wondering why irony is lost, just remember that Harvey Weinstein has almost as many rape accusations as Donald Trump does. Which makes this next entry even more extremely horrible than it already is!

A night of comedy ended with an audience member being asked to leave the venue after she and a performer called out Harvey Weinstein, who attended the show.

Kelly Bachman, one of several performers in a variety show at a Manhattan bar on Wednesday night, told CNN she spotted Weinstein and used part of her set to call the former Hollywood producer "Freddy Krueger" and call out the rape allegations against him.

Weinstein currently faces criminal charges of predatory sexual assault, criminal sexual act, first-degree rape and third-degree rape. He has pleaded not guilty and maintains all sexual encounters he's been involved in have been consensual. His trial is expected to begin in January.

An audience member, Zoe Stuckless, also confronted Weinstein at his table and demanded he be asked to leave, according to video Stuckless shared on Facebook. Instead, Stuckless was asked to leave the bar, and Bachman left with Stuckless, the comic said.

The venue, Downtime Bar, confirmed in a statement posted to its Facebook page that an audience member was asked to leave after heckling another guest. "After several requests to stop were ignored, we kindly asked the heckler to leave," the statement said. The bar's Facebook page has since been deleted, but the statement is still posted as an Instagram Story on its Instagram page.
https://www.cnn.com/2019/10/25/us/harvey-weinstein-confronted-at-bar/index.html

Oh just a little? Irony is apparently lost here as it is super fucking creepy that a guy who’s been accused of being a serial rapist is hanging out at a showcase for young actresses! I And it gets worse from there because not only did that happen, Harvey Weinstein kicked them out! Which really only proves the point that they were making. Oh and it gets worse – so much worse. Apparently NBC executives tried to shield Weinstein from the roast that broke out, and they’re not denying it!

MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow laid out in excruciating detail the alleged misconduct of NBC News executives, who have been accused of killing an explosive exposé on Harvey Weinstein’s sexual assaults and of repeatedly shielding former Today Show host Matt Lauer from similar claims: “Those accusations are very, very hard to stomach.”

In a long and devastating monologue, Maddow recounted the reporting history of guest Ronan Farrow. She explained how Farrow’s bombshell reporting on Weinstein and the #MeToo movement, which ultimately earned him a Pulitzer Prize, was started at NBC News but was continually hamstrung and eventually blocked from air, because of objections raised by network executives like NBC News President Noah Oppenheim.

“Now, NBC News is obviously our parent company here at MSNBC,” Maddow noted, before offering a very raw and personal response to the controversy. “The allegations about the behavior of Harvey Weinstein and Matt Lauer are gut-wrenching, at baseline, no matter who you are or what your connection is to this story. But accusations that people in positions of authority in this building may have been complicit in some way in shielding those guys from accountability? Those accusations are very, very hard to stomach.”

Maddow went on to note a potential pattern of network interference in seminal stories about alleged sexual harassment involving powerful men, including the infamous “grab ’em by the pussy” tape of President Donald Trump.
https://www.mediaite.com/tv/maddow-scorches-nbc-over-accusations-network-execs-shielded-weinstein-lauer-very-very-hard-to-stomach/

Of course they are! Nobody wants to be accused of being a serial rapist, and don’t do the crime if you can’t do the time! That goes for you too Matt Lauer! Don’t think you’re getting out of this one that easily, same goes for anyone like this. But here’s the worst part – don’t take it out on the venue who hosted the thing. Yeah they fucked up in ejecting the women performers for confronting Weinstein, but if you weren’t there, shut the fuck up!

Yelp users are flooding Lower East Side’s Downtime Bar with one-star reviews after women were reportedly thrown out of the venue for confronting Harvey Weinstein. The bar recently hosted an event meant to support up-and-coming artists, and when Weinstein — who has been accused of rape and other sexual misconduct by dozens of women, specifically young female actors — was spotted in the room, three women confronted him. Two of them were eventually kicked out, according to reports.

Now, several dozen people are calling to boycott the bar, including a reviewer that uploaded a photo of Weinstein’s alleged victims. The backlash comes after a viral video shows comedian Kelly Bachman addressing the “elephant in the room” in her set, calling Weinstein “Freddy Krueger,” only to be booed and told to “shut up” by the crowd. Another video shows actor Zoe Stuckless pointing at Weinstein and yelling, “Nobody’s really going to say anything?” before being kicked out of the bar. Attendee Amber Rollo tweeted that she too was thrown out after calling him a “monster” and saying “he should disappear.”

Actors Hour, the organization behind the exclusive artists-only event, put out a statement on Instagram saying it did not invite Weinstein, though the post has since been taken down. Downtime Bar released its own statement saying that Actors Hour “rented our bar for a private event, with a guest list all their own.”

In a statement sent to the Post, Weinstein says, “We should all be offered the courtesy to voice opinions and be heard, and to even get answers.” His rep called the scene “downright rude” and an infringement on due process.
https://ny.eater.com/2019/10/25/20930666/harvey-weinstein-downtime-bar-controversy

Yeah well I hope you don’t get the Yelp reviewer special! But as we’ve seen with unpopular people going out in public outside of their bubble like Trump did, Harvey Weinstein should probably never go out in public again, or he’s going to get these kinds of accusations. And why is he not in jail? Really someone should get on that! And seriously guys, no, we don’t need a comeback from scumbags like Weinstein, they should just stay out of the spotlight!

Former mega-producer Harvey Weinstein has become a symbol of the powerful men taken down by the Me Too movement since 2017, when he was accused of sexual harassment, assault, and rape by dozens of women, including actresses Gwyneth Paltrow and Angelina Jolie. But despite frequent lamentations that we are living in an era of cancel culture, even Weinstein might not be permanently canceled.

On Wednesday night, Weinstein attended Actor’s Hour, an event for young performers based out of Downtime Bar on New York’s Lower East Side. And while there was outcry from some attendees, much of the crowd did not seem upset to see him there, vociferously defending Weinstein from any jokes or comments made at his expense.

Weinstein has been getting some practice at dealing with such reactions lately. According to the Hollywood Reporter, as his January trial date for rape and sexual assault approaches, Weinstein has begun to reemerge at some of his old haunts, like the lower Manhattan restaurant Cipriani Downtown. He attended September’s Actor’s Hour as well (and was denounced by a comic onstage that time, too).

The whole pattern has the appearance of a trial balloon, a test to see how the world reacts to the idea of Harvey Weinstein appearing in public again. And in Hollywood, that trial balloon is usually followed, sooner or later, by a comeback.
https://www.vox.com/culture/2019/10/25/20932084/harvey-weinstein-comeback-actors-hour-downtime-bar

[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
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Hit it!

Of course you know by now that people are people and people are dumb. And this segment incorporates all walks of stupid – dumb criminals, dumb lawyers, dumb politicians, dumb students, you name it! And I also love these stories because they are all completely crazy and there’s enough of them that we could do these until the end of time! I want to start with this story out of Iowa – and yeah if you’re a guy you should *NEVER* expose your junk in public, no matter what the circumstances. But I love the excuse here – even though it’s not a good one, is that this guy who did the dirty deed claims that he saw it in a porno movie!

An Iowa man charged with exposing himself to a woman at a variety store told cops that he “had seen someone do it in a pornographic film” and thought the victim, who was accompanied by her minor son, might “respond to it sexually,” according to a court filing.

Nicholas Sheehy, 23, was arrested Friday afternoon at the Dollar General in Ottumwa, a city about 85 miles southeast of Des Moines. Sheehy, an Ottumwa resident, was charged with indecent exposure, a serious misdemeanor.

When confronted by police, Sheehy “admitted that he ‘whipped it out’ referring to his penis,” a criminal complaint alleges. “The defendant stated that he had seen someone do it in a pornographic film and believed that the female patron may respond to it sexually.”

Instead, the woman contacted cops, who reported that Sheehy “admitted that he exposed himself for sexual gratification.”
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/crime/dollar-general-creep-639524

Next up – we go to *ANOTHER* story out of Iowa. Man, Iowa is bringing the crazy extra hard lately aren’t they? Well I mean there’s not much to do there so you got to get creative. But when you start turning to crime, a fresh coat of paint is definitely not the way that you want to hide the crime, and well, he got caught red handed. Or is it green handed? I’m not sure.

Police said a Dubuque man stole a trailer from a business and painted it black to keep anyone from recognizing it while he used it.

Malik J. Patterson, 20, of 17262 John Deere Road, No. 11, was arrested Wednesday morning on warrants charging second-degree theft and obstructing prosecution.

Police on Sept. 4 responded to Bicycle World, 1072 Central Ave., to investigate a report of a theft.

Business owner Parrish C. Marugg said he left the shop Sept. 3 and left his trailer, valued at $2,000, in the parking lot, according to court documents. When he returned the following morning, it was gone.
https://www.telegraphherald.com/news/tri-state/article_582e5118-2cd5-5d7d-b5b4-d79b9395264a.html?utm_source=thonline&utm_medium=click_source&utm_campaign=homepage_top_news_card_more_stories

That is a good question! Next up – we go to Las Vegas! I am really surprised that this doesn’t happen more often because people tend to go crazy when they start losing money at casinos. Maybe not so much on the Vegas Strip, but there’s plenty of off strip action happening all around the gambling paradise known as Vegas. But if you start losing money, it’s your own damn fault. Don’t blame the casino for it!

Police say a woman who was angered when she was kicked out of a Las Vegas-area casino intentionally drove her motorhome into the building, injuring a custodian.

North Las Vegas Police spokesman Eric Leavitt says the 50-year-old woman was ejected from the Cannery casino Friday morning and drove her Winnebago motorhome into the building.

Leavitt says the woman hit a 66-year-old custodial worker who was outside the building. The Las Vegas Review-Journal reports the worker was critically injured but is expected to survive.

Leavitt told KVVU-TV that the woman kept hitting the gas and her vehicle was stuck in the building’s entrance. Employees had to remove the woman to get her to stop.
https://kwwl.com/news/national-news-from-the-associated-press/2019/10/25/woman-drives-motorhome-into-casino-after-shes-kicked-out/

Next up we go to Minneapolis! Yeah the meth industry attracts some extremely strange people to it, not to mention some incredibly armed and extremely dangerous people to it. But last week we brought you that story about When Standing Your Ground Goes Wrong. Well, do 18th century cannons fall under the controversial Stand Your Ground law?

A Dassel couple is facing weapons and drug charges after authorities seized more than 50 grams of methamphetamine and more than a dozen weapons from their home, including a functioning cannon.

Bret Bruce Wakefield, 59, and Ramona Jean Wakefield, 56, are facing one count each of first-degree sale of a controlled substance, first-degree possession of a controlled substance and firearm possession.

According to the complaint, CEE-VI Drug and Gang Task Force agents served a search warrant Monday at the couple’s home on the 17000 block of Highway 15 South. Upon arrival, they immediately located the couple and had them detained while completing their sweep of the residence.

With a broader search of the property, agents recovered 12 firearms and a functioning cannon.
https://minnesota.cbslocal.com/2019/10/22/dassel-couple-found-in-possession-of-drugs-weapons-including-working-cannon/

Next up - we cant get out of here without talking about America’s most penis shaped state, the great state of Florida. The Sunshine State always brings it every week, and we do want to thank the @Florida_Man Twitter account for keeping us up to date on these stories. While I do love Florida Man stories, I also love Doomsday Prepper stories, and none is more prepper than this, but really don’t build your doomsday shelter from stolen parts! That never ends well!

A Florida man preparing for the end of the world is under investigation for stealing vehicles and building a "doomsday bunker" in his backyard.

They found the trailer at the man's home, where he had apparently been stockpiling stolen vehicles and burying them in the backyard to create an underground shelter.

Though the man reportedly told police he did not have a prediction for when the world would end, chances are he wouldn't have survived the end times in his makeshift shelter even if he had gotten away with building it.

"A trailer is not structurally sound," Craig Holland, the city's development-services director, told the Orlando Sentinel. "I don't think it would have protected him from much."
https://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/florida-man-stole-trailers-food-truck-planned-bury-doomsday-bunker-police-article-1.1157841

That is a good point sir! And by the way that was a weird Google Image search! Finally this week this might be one of my favorite Florida Man stories in a while. Yeah so Florida Man was caught inside a Target store defiling stuffed animals, and… Olaf from Frozen. This is real! This happened! I laughed so hard when I first saw this story and well I had to include it. And the sad thing is they had to put Olaf out to pasture after this. And I’ll never hear “Let It Go” in the same way ever again!

A Florida Man yesterday sexually assaulted a pair of “large stuffed animal toys” inside a Target store, according to police who arrested the fiend on a criminal mischief charge.

As detailed in a criminal complaint, Cody Christopher Meader, 20, entered the retailer around 2 PM Tuesday and approached a display of merchandise featuring characters from the Disney film “Frozen.”

Meader, seen at right, selected a “large Olaf stuffed animal” and proceeded to place it on the floor of the Target in Pinellas Park. He then began to “dry hump” the cinematic snowman “until he ejaculated on the merchandise,” a cop reported.

Meader returned the soiled Olaf back to the display before entering the toy department, where he “selected a large unicorn stuffed animal and began to ‘dry hump’ this item.”
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/bizarre/olaf-targeted-642935

That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]Keeping Up With The Candidates Ep. 12: Beto’s Gun Policy
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Welcome back to our guide to the mother of all elections to end elections until the remainder of time in 2020, Keeping Up With The Candidates. Last week we discussed the breaking news about how Tulsi Gabbard might be being groomed as a Russian agent. Or a republican one. Or she might tell both to fuck off and go third party. Yeah that would be the absolute worst response to that. Kind of like getting into a car accident and telling your insurance company you did it for the LULZ. Yeah that never works. OK enough of that. We have to talk about America’s 800 pound gorilla in the room and that’s guns. What are we going to do about America’s gun violence epidemic? There’s only one man out of the 24 who has the balls to take on the NRA, and that’s Texas’ Beto O’Rourke. He has a very controversial plan to end gun violence, but what is it? We will take a look and see!

Beto O'Rourke dismissed criticisms of his sweeping gun control proposal, telling CBS News in an interview Thursday night that he expects gun owners will go along with his plan to institute a "mandatory buyback" of high-powered rifles.

"If we're able to pass mandatory buybacks and I'm able to sign that into law, then I fully expect our fellow Americans to turn in their AR-15s and their AK-47s," the former Texas congressman said.

O'Rourke's "mandatory buyback" plan, which would force gun owners to surrender high-powered rifles like the AR-15 and the AK-47, has been criticized as impractical by other candidates in the race. South Bend Mayor Pete Buttigieg, for example, has said that O'Rourke's plan amounts to "confiscation."

Buttigieg and O'Rourke sparred over their gun views at the most recent Democratic debate earlier this month. Buttigieg, who backs more traditional gun control measures like universal background checks, dismissed O'Rourke's idea as a "purity test" and a "shiny object." In a jab back at Buttigieg, O'Rourke said that Democrats should not base their opinions on polling and what consultants say.
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/beto-orourke-says-he-expects-americans-to-surrender-their-guns/

Seriously, good luck with that! I am definitely not poo pooing the idea, but have you seen the comments posted on gun threads, Beto? The most hardcore gun nutters definitely aren’t putting down their weapons that easily. Yeah I know it’s a comments section – the bathroom stall wall of the internet, and by the way – let us know what you think in the comments! Stay on target, stay on target! But what is specifically involved in this thing?

Former Rep. Beto O'Rourke struggled to explain on Wednesday how he would make people who wish to do harm with an assault-style weapon to comply with his proposed mandatory gun buyback, a plan that divided Democrats at Tuesday's primary debate hosted by CNN and The New York Times.

O'Rourke's plan includes a ban on assault-style weapons and for the federal government to buy back firearms, including AK-47s and AR-15s, for a "fair price" -- or otherwise face a fine.

Pressed by CNN's Alisyn Camerota Wednesday on how he planned to get assault-style weapons from people who would be reluctant to hand them over, O'Rourke, a former US representative from Texas, insisted that Americans would abide by the law.

"It's pretty simple. As with any law in this country, we would expect our fellow Americans to follow the law," O'Rourke said on CNN's "New Day."
https://www.cnn.com/2019/10/16/politics/beto-orourke-mandatory-buyback-proposal-cnntv/index.html

Yeah I think Stewie is the perfect example of someone who should not be allowed to own a gun because you know he won’t use it for good! But a mandatory program Beto? You are really going there? I’m not saying no one should have guns and I’m not touching that one with a 10 foot pole. But here’s the problem with a mandatory gun buy back program: the keyword “mandatory”. Yeah some gun nutters, that’s exactly what they want, and they’re not going down without a fight!

If Tuesday night’s Democratic presidential debate decided anything, it was that Texas dodged a bullet — literally — when it failed to elect Beto O’Rourke to the U.S. Senate last year.

Ever since August’s devastating mass shooting at an El Paso Walmart, the former congressman has made promoting comprehensive gun control his raison d’etre.

That isn’t surprising or even problematic, really. Progressive Democrats have long capitalized on national tragedies in their effort to promote gun restrictions, even as there is no clear evidence that mass shootings are on the rise.

And, in fairness, the horrific nature of the El Paso shooting probably warranted a strong response from its former representative in Congress. Even some prominent conservatives have made the case for gun reforms in its wake, advocating policy proposals such as red-flag laws. Other Republicans have indicated an openness to strengthening background checks.

But O’Rourke has gone much further in his gun control advocacy, declaring on the debate stage in Houston last month, “Hell yes, we’re going to take your AR-15, your AK-47. We’re not going to allow it to be used against our fellow Americans anymore.”
https://www.star-telegram.com/opinion/cynthia-m-allen/article236352388.html

Yeah really, while you’re concerned about vaping, there’s plenty of people who are armed to the teeth that will kill you before inhaling a lifetime of electronic smoke will do! This is why Beto’s gun buyback policy is a good idea in theory but would have a near impossible time working in real life. By the way if you want to see how an actual gun buyback program, here’s how Japan handled the situation. And you know what? Japan has the lowest number of shootings in the entire world!

Gun control discussions crop up every time there is an attention-grabbing shooting in the US. On Wednesday, a 19-year-old allegedly shot dozens of his former classmates at a Florida high school, leaving 17 of them dead.

One of the biggest questions: How does the US prevent this from happening over and over again?

Although the US has no exact counterpart elsewhere in the world, some countries have taken steps that can provide a window into what successful gun control looks like. Japan, a country of 127 million people and yearly gun deaths rarely totaling more than 10, is one such country.

"Ever since guns entered the country, Japan has always had strict gun laws," Iain Overton, executive director of Action on Armed Violence, a British advocacy group, told the BBC. "They are the first nation to impose gun laws in the whole world, and I think it laid down a bedrock saying that guns really don't play a part in civilian society."
https://www.businessinsider.com/gun-control-how-japan-has-almost-completely-eliminated-gun-deaths-2017-10

[font size="4"]Next Week:[/font]

Next week we’re going to check in with the Bernie Sanders camp and find out what his latest chances of winning the election are after his recent health crisis!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]Korn[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen, my next guest is one of the reigning kings of Halloween! You can see them on tour this January and February with Breaking Benjamin! Playing their song “Cold” from their album “The Nothing”, give it up for Korn!

Thank you Oregon State! This was fun! We are off to Gonzaga University in Spokane! See you next week!

Credits

Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: Oregon State University, Eugene, OR
Special Thanks To: Oregon State University
Holy Shit Gospel Choir: Oregon State Choir Club, Eugene, OR
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Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

October 23, 2019

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #7-16: Bed Bugs & Broomsticks Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #7-16: Bed Bugs & Broomsticks Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! What’s up UNLV?? ? How you guys doing? You doing fucking good? Great! I want to say first off congratulations to the Houston Astros and the Washington Nationals for winning the pennants and Houston especially for sending the Yankees home packing with that amazing walk off two run home run in the 9th inning. Yankees, you can rest easier knowing you won’t have to go to the White House to eat Big Macs with Trump. Do we have time for the thing? Yeah so did anyone hear the story of Jared Leto trying to shut down the Joker? Yeah that happened – I mean did you see the Joker movie? I did and it was great. Did you see Suicide Squad? I did and that was torture. Thank you sir, yeah the 21 Pilots song is the best thing to come out of Suicide Squad, though I can’t wait to see Birds Of Prey. That of course is the stand alone movie about the Joker’s girlfriend Harley Quinn. But here’s the thing, like I said did you see Suicide Squad? Remember how bad the Joker’s performance was in that movie? Yeah so do I. Just because you play that character doesn’t mean that you own that character. Maybe Mr. Leto should take a page from his character and say that everything burns. Even an iconic character like the Joker can collapse. Although it could be worse – it could be Gemini Man. Hey o!!! OK that’s enough of the intro, we have a lot of idiocy to get to. But first Bill Maher is back and he has an interesting idea to get Trump to leave the Oval Office – the only language he speaks:

Man the news just keeps getting weirder doesn’t it? In the number one slot we’re going to bring back one of our favorite new segments. Which is when there’s too much batshit crazy news happening, like your favorite pasta sauce, we throw a whole bunch of stories into a blender and hit “puree” in “So That Happened” (1). In the second slot this week, sadly we lost a living legend when longtime Baltimore representative Elijah Cummings passed away. And of course, since the MAGA world is insane and completely predictable, we’re going to talk about their disgusting reactions to his death. Taking the number three slot, is of course the guy who we currently call president, Donald J. Trump (3), and his attempt at international diplomacy in regards to the Turkey – Syria situation, is what the military would call a colossal SNAFU. Mad e even worse by a letter that Trump wrote to PM Erdogan, and it is quite insane. In the fourth slot this week, is also our current president, @realDonaldTrump (4). Could the international meeting of economic leaders known as the G-7 Summit be headed to Mar-A-Shithole? Well, yes, and no, and by the way, Trump treated the US Constitution about as well as Erdogan treated his letter! At slot number 5 is our weekly investigative piece, Top 10 Investigate (5) and this week – a shocking study was done on baby food and the food that you’re giving your kid, might be laced with toxins! Hooray for extreme corporate deregulation! At the sixth slot is of course our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in “Holy Shit” and the apocalypse is evident, people! Our resident pastor is going to weigh in on some recent doomsday theories and offer a few of his own! At slot number 7 this week we have a new edition of “This Fucking Guy” and we’re going to introduce you to conservative Christian firebrand conspiracy theorist podcaster Chris McDonald and whew, this fucking guy. At slot number 8 is our segment “Unpopular Opinions”, and this week – after student loan tycoon Sallie Mae was caught grifting with their pants down, we’re going to tell you what we really think about them! In the number 9 (NEIN!!!) slot this week we have a new “People Are Dumb” (9) because of course they are! Finally our 2020 voters’ guide “Keeping Up With The Candidates” is going to touch on the issues this week – in particular Beto O’Rourke’s controversial gun buyback program. What is it and how do you explain it to your gun loving NRA member relatives? And the palate cleanser this week, we have some live music from country’s outlaw anti-hero, Sturgill Simpson! Really buy his new album “Sound & Fury” or you’re no friend of this program! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]So That Happened
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Yeah that happened! Just like your favorite pasta sauce, we dump all the ingredients into a blender and hit “puree” because there’s so much crazy stuff that happens on an almost daily basis. We live in an era where there’s no off switch from the daily news and it gets crazier by the day. And this segment is basically free-floating crazy news. Almost kind of like People Are Dumb. I want to start with this story out of course our nation’s capital. So there was a pro-Trump rally on the National Mall. And this story is pure what happens when you get a bunch of Trump supporters together and they decide to do something to imitate their dear leader? Well, they say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, so…

A couple hundred Donald Trump fans rallied outside Congress on Thursday for the “March for Trump,” an event meant to oppose House Democrats’ impeachment investigation. According to organizers, though, there would have been hundreds more people shouting “stop the coup” in Washington’s streets if not for a liberal plot against their buses. That’s because, as would-be rally attendees gathered across the East Coast for the US Coachways buses that the organizer had promised would take them to Washington, those buses never showed. The no-shows provoked a wave of anger, accusations that the “deep state” had colluded to stop a show of Trump support in Washington, and negative reviews aimed at US Coachways.

But US Coachways has a simpler explanation for what happened—it was never paid for the requested buses due to a series of declined credit card payments. “We want to get people down there,” Joseph Heap, US Coachways’ chief marketing officer, told The Daily Beast. “But unfortunately, payment is required.”

For those who made it to the rally, the missing buses were a subject of anger, consternation, and conspiracies. Rally speaker and One America News personality Jack Posobiec compared the bus issue to social media companies “deplatforming” conservatives.

“I hear there was a buses issue today,” Posobiec said. “The company refused to work with folks.”
https://www.thedailybeast.com/us-coachways-charter-bus-company-did-not-sabotage-the-march-for-trump?ref=author

Well pay up suckas! I mean isn't that typical? You build up all this hype and then skimp out on the bill. Who does that sound like? Wait, do I even need to ask that question? I mean it's pretty obvious that he's inspiring this! And no idiots, it’s not some “deep state conspiracy”. Pay your bills, deadbeats! And by the way you know how I love it when the pro-Trump bullies known as Alt Right get taken down more than a few pegs? Well this happened to one of our favorite groups.

Two members of the far-right group the Proud Boys were each sentenced to four years in prison and five years post-release supervision on Tuesday for their involvement in a violent 2018 clash with anti-fascist protesters in New York City, the Manhattan District Attorney’s office said.

Maxwell Hare, 27, and John Kinsman, 40, had been convicted of attempted gang assault, attempted assault and riot in August. The jury in State Supreme Court had rejected the defendants’ claims that they had acted in self-defense.

Hare and Kinsman are two of 10 Proud Boys members who were charged in connection with the October 2018 brawl, in which they beat four anti-fascist – also known as “antifa” – protestors after an event featuring Proud Boys founder Gavin McInnes at the Metropolitan Republican Club on Manhattan's Upper East Side.

“These defendants transformed a quiet, residential street into the site of a battle-royale, kicking and beating four individuals in a brutal act of political violence,” Manhattan District Attorney Cyrus Vance said.
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/proud-boys-members-sentenced-four-years-prison-violent-clash-antifa-n1070166

But the bullies known as the Alt Right simply refuse to go quietly. This happened in Santa Monica on Saturday and I was just hanging out there on Friday. It’s getting ugly and the alt right refuse to go down, they’re pulling no punches. Or they are pulling several punches depending on which side you are on during the protests on the pier.

Video shows a man in a MAGA hat being detained after a crowd of Trump protestors and supporters were sent screaming and running on the Santa Monica Pier after at least one person pepper sprayed the crowd Saturday.

A witness who is a KTLA employee caught the incident on camera.

The Santa Monica Police Department said they received reports that a young man pepper sprayed four or six people at the pier at about 1:20 p.m. It's unclear if that's the same person seen being detained after the incident.

The crowd, some holding Trump flags and U.S. flags, others holding orange posters that read "Trump Pence Must Go" appeared to be involved in an argument before the the substance is sprayed at the panicked crowd.

Many ran away screaming and coughing. One woman was vomiting nearby, the witness said.
https://ktla.com/2019/10/19/video-man-in-maga-hat-detained-after-protestors-pepper-sprayed-at-santa-monica-pier/

I only hope that it wasn’t like that! I mean come on, pepper spray isn’t something to be taken lightly and it makes a great taco hot sauce! And finally in a serious case of telling Trump to shut the hell up, he appears to be beating the proverbial war drums quite loudly. And considering all the horrible things that are going on in the world, this definitely isn’t helping.

President Donald Trump on Monday offered a confusing description of his foreign policy priorities as commander in chief — insisting that he is working to bring home American soldiers, while warning the U.S. may soon enter into new military conflicts.

“I'm trying to get out of wars. We may have to get in wars, too. OK? We may have to get in wars,” Trump told reporters at the White House.

Story Continued Below

“We're better prepared than we've ever been,” he continued. “If Iran does something, they'll be hit like they've never been hit before. I mean, we have things that we're looking at.”

Story Continued Below

The remarks from the president come as his administration confronts escalating tensions across the Middle East and navigates new troop movements in the region.

Trump in recent days has sought to promote a temporary cease-fire agreement Vice President Mike Pence negotiated last week with President Recep Tayyip Erdogan of Turkey, aimed at halting the slaughter of U.S.-allied Kurdish fighters in Syria by Turkish forces.
https://www.politico.com/news/2019/10/21/trump-united-states-wars-iran-053341

[font size="8"]Death Of Elijah Cummings
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Sadly we lost a living legend last week when longtime Baltimore representative Elijah Cummings passed after severe health complications. Made even sadder by Trump’s comments on Baltimore back in August. I would link to a previous edition, but that was the one that got cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances. Anyway, back on topic., politics is a weird game. Whenever someone from their side dies, it’s revealed just how horrible of a person he was. But when someone on our side dies, the other side cackles with glee and says that they had it coming to them. That’s where we come in. Yeah fuck those people.

On his radio program today, right-wing commentator and pastor Jesse Lee Peterson responded to the news that Democratic Rep. Elijah Cummings had died by declaring “that’s what happens when you mess with The Great White Hope,” which is the term he uses to describe President Donald Trump.

“He dead,” Peterson said. “That’s what happens when you mess with The Great White Hope. Don’t mess with God’s children.”

“Don’t mess with The Great White Hope,” he repeated. “You see what happens.”

“If you notice, John McCain, he dead. Charles Krauthammer, he dead. And Elijah Cumming, now he dead,” Peterson declared. “They all didn’t like The Great White Hope, they went against him, they talked about him, now they all dead. That’s amazin’.”
https://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/jesse-lee-peterson-on-the-passing-of-rep-elijah-cummings-thats-what-happens-when-you-mess-with-the-great-white-hope/

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! That’s amazing? Who are you? Huell Howser? I mean good god as if you couldn’t make any more of an insensitive statement. I’m actually kind of glad that Trump stayed silent on this one because he could have made it that much worse. Anyone remember what a dick he was about Baltimore just a couple of months ago?

President Trump on Friday joked about a middle-of-the-night break-in at the Baltimore home of his nemesis Rep. Elijah Cummings over the weekend. Cummings was at home during the incident but was not harmed.

“Really bad news! The Baltimore house of Elijah Cummings was robbed,” the president tweeted. “Too bad!”

The message drew criticism from Trump’s former ambassador to the United Nations, Nikki Haley.

Police said the burglary at Cummings’s home in West Baltimore occurred at 3:40 Saturday morning, hours before Trump’s controversial tweets attacking the Democratic congressman and calling the city a “disgusting, rat and rodent infested mess” where “no human being would want to live.”

A spokesman for the Baltimore Police Department said Thursday that it is unknown if any property was taken. In a statement Friday, Cummings said he was “notified of the intrusion by my security system.”
https://www.yahoo.com/news/too-bad-trump-tweets-burglary-elijah-cummings-baltimore-home-142416146.html

Yeah you all suck! I’m tired of this shit. And I’m pretty sure that Jesus is too. Because when you point out what these morons are spouting, vs the kind of person that Elijah Cummings actually was, well, wouldn’t you rather by more like Elijah? I think we could all use more of that in our lives. And really, fuck the haters, especially those who dare to call themselves “Christian”. Maybe this is Death At A Congressman’s Funeral?

Following Cummings’ death, Christian fundamentalist Dave Daubenmire denounced him as an “enemy of the cross” and added, “Maybe he didn’t know Jesus.” Daubenmire went on to say, “I haven’t been sitting around praying that Elijah Cummings would die. But now that he did, I’m glad he’s gone . . . I bet he’s not pro-choice now. I bet he’s not pro-homo now.”

Actually, the African-American church had a major influence on Cummings’ civil rights work. Cummings’ association with the New Psalmist Baptist Church in Baltimore spanned at least 40 years, and he would sing “This Little Light of Mine” (a Christian hymn) at civil rights marches. But to extremists like Daubenmire, only far-right white evangelicals and Trump supporters can truly “know Jesus.”

Radio host Jesse Lee Peterson, who is black, has been brutally mocked in the African-American community for calling Trump “the Great White Hope” — and he doesn’t mean it in an ironic way. As Peterson sees it, Cummings dared to take on “the Great White Hope” and paid for it with his life.

People for the American Way’s Right Wing Watch posted a video of Peterson saying, “if you notice, John McCain, he dead. Charles Krauthammer, he dead. And Elijah Cummings, now he dead. They all didn’t like 'The Great White Hope;' they went against him, they talked about him. Now, they all dead. That’s amazing.”

Peterson warned Trump opponents, “Don’t mess with 'The Great White Hope.' You see what happens. Don’t mess with God’s children.”
https://www.salon.com/2019/10/21/these-far-right-christian-fundamentalists-believe-god-killed-elijah-cummings-for-opposing-trump_partner/

Yeah seriously, fuck Dave Daubenmire, fuck Jesse Lee Peterson, fuck Mark Taylor, fuck all these scumbags. You know what? I don’t want you to get out of here with a bad taste in your mouth, so let’s remember Elijah Cummings for the kind of person he was rather than the haters gloating about his untimely death. We could all stand to be more like Elijah.

America lost a great leader today with the passing of Rep. Elijah Cummings (D-MD), the proud son of Baltimore who chaired the House Oversight Committee and played a key role in the Trump impeachment inquiry.

During his decades in Congress, Cummings earned a spotless reputation for integrity, intelligence, and commitment to progressive values. He coped superbly with the demands of his position, whether he was chairing a contentious public hearing on Donald Trump’s impeachable offenses or calming his city in the aftermath of a police killing. The respect he won for his political skills shaded into affection and even love, among Republicans as well as fellow Democrats, because he always led with humanity. He never lost the sense of dignity and gravity that motivated his public service, no matter how outrageous the behavior of his right-wing opponents.

He displayed that unshakeable righteous strength, so well expressed in his sonorous voice, last summer when Donald Trump assaulted him with a blatantly racist caricature of his district. Cummings responded by inviting the president to visit Baltimore with him — and then delivered a powerful denunciation of the white supremacist tropes and terrorism that have plagued the nation under Trump.
https://www.nationalmemo.com/a-mighty-voice-elijah-cummings-1951-2019/?fbclid=IwAR2mNH8ksgld165gxAGnnwr189hGCktYcBYNhWhM8hjjxh-4kV1rvYBvWKc

[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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Sigh… We have to go from talking about a great man (Elijah Cummings) to talking about one of the worst scumbags on the planet who’s ever dared to call himself a “leader” and that’s the guy who we currently call president, Donald J. Trump. The man is seriously unhinged and it might take World War III to get us out of this madness, and he might just be the mad man needed to start it. So what’s escalating the conflict between the US and Turkey? Not to mention the conflict between Turkey, Syria and the Kurdish people? Well Trump is alienating our allies, and Turkey might get Art Of The Deal’d. The whole clusterfuck is getting that much worse made by the asshole in the White House. And it could take decades to sort this madnesss.

President Donald Trump’s letter to Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan, urging him not to go after an enemy Kurdish military group in neighboring Syria as U.S. troops depart the war-torn country, indicates that the U.S. president wants to corner his Turkish counterpart. But Erdogan, who has run Turkey for nearly two decades, may well be smarter than to let himself be trapped.

So far, the Turkish president shows no sign of stopping his relentless advance despite the threat of American sanctions Trump delivered in his missive, made public Wednesday but penned last week. Erdogan has calculated that even if the sanctions come, they won’t be sufficient to disrupt the Turkish military strategy; he figures that what Trump wants most is to bring U.S. troops home, and he won't do much more to prevent the offensive against the Kurds.

Erdogan is without doubt the most consequential Turkish leader in nearly a century. The move is just the latest example of Erdogan’s ability to play off major world powers to get what he wants — though at the cost of his international relationships.

In 1923, Mustafa Kemal Ataturk established modern Turkey in his image as a secular state oriented toward Europe and the West. Styling himself as the new Ataturk since becoming prime minister in 2003, Erdogan has revolutionized Turkish politics, striving to recast the country from the top down in his own image: profoundly Islamic and socially conservative.
https://www.nbcnews.com/think/opinion/turkey-s-erdogan-plays-trump-putin-he-tries-remake-middle-ncna1067736

And by the way in case you’re wondering if Tayyuip Erdogan is the world’s newest middle eastern Warmongerer, well, he’s getting some massive help from Trump. and Trump is about to go full Art Of The Deal on this guy. But if you’re guessing, Trump treated Erdogan about as well as you’d expect Trump to, and Erdogan retaliated in about the same way that you would expect an insane leader and potential mass murderer to react.

When Fox News’ Trish Regan first reported President Donald Trump’s October 9 letter to Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdoğan, some journalists and pundits wondered whether it was a joke or a hoax. But the White House confirmed: It was genuine.

“History will look upon you favorably if you get this done the right and humane way. It will look upon you forever as the devil if good things don’t happen. Don’t be a tough guy. Don’t be a fool!” Trump wrote, signing off incongruously, “I will call you later.”

As it turns out, the Turkish government didn’t stop to puzzle over whether the missive was authentic or a joke: It quickly concluded that it was both.

The letter “was not taken seriously at the time, especially given its lack of diplomatic finesse,” Gülnur Aybet, a senior adviser to Erdoğan, told NPR’s Morning Edition today. The BBC quoted a Turkish source saying that “President Erdoğan received the letter, thoroughly rejected it, and put it in the bin.”

The letter’s language and the puerility of Trump’s attempt at forestalling a Turkish invasion of northern Syria are embarrassing on their own—the language and syntax resembling a tense note exchange in a middle-school classroom far more than the stilted conventions of international relations.
https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2019/10/trump-erdogan-letter/600214/

I can only imagine Erdogan throwing the letter away and it comes back to hit him in the face. In fact the conflict over in that region is escalating and I’m not sure which side I would want to be on – the US’s side or Ankara’s side? Yeah I don’t think I am choosing either side because both sides are incredibly dangerous and have unhinged lunatics at the helm. This isn’t going to end well no matter who’s involved.

Donald Trump is said to be “not happy” after his acting chief of staff, Mick Mulvaney, appeared to confirm the US had withheld military aid to Ukraine for political purposes, acknowledging the quid pro quo Democrats pursuing the president’s impeachment have sought to prove.

The close of the week brought a new round of fresh controversies enveloping Mr Trump’s White House, from his acting chief of staff’s comments during a press briefing on Thursday, to the violence in Syria after his decision to withdraw troops from the region.

Mr Trump was quick to hail the ceasefire his vice president Mike Pence agreed with Turkish president Recep Tayyip Erdogan in Ankara over the Syria crisis. The president said on Twitter it was a “great day for civilisation” shortly after Turkey agreed to a 120-hour ceasefire that provided the country with many of its demands made prior to the deadly violence that shook northeastern Syria.

But his DC rivals denounced the measure as a “sham” as the fighting continued between the Turkish military and the Syrian Democratic Forces.
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/trump-news-live-twitter-today-schiff-ivanka-erdogan-letter-ukraine-impeachment-biden-syria-turkey-a9162256.html

I’m pretty sure that’s a dramatic reenactment of what happened! Now the flip side – as if this side wasn’t horrifying enough – the flip side is that Trump is currently laughing at Erdogan for how he is treating him. Oh President Stable Genius, do we really need you to placate your ego in this increasingly escalating conflict? Easy answer: Hell no!!!

US President Donald Trump has compared the deadly conflict between Turkish forces and Kurds in north-eastern Syria to a fight between children.

"Like two kids in a lot, you have got to let them fight and then you pull them apart," he told a rally in Texas.

Turkey has agreed to a US request to suspend operations so long as Kurdish fighters leave the border area.

But fighting appeared to continue on Friday despite a denial by Turkey's President Recep Tayyip Erdogan.

On Friday, French President Emmanuel Macron complained he had only learned about the US withdrawal from Syria via a tweet from Mr Trump.

"I understood that we were in Nato, that the United States and Turkey were in Nato," Mr Macron told reporters at an EU summit.
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-middle-east-50094738

[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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In case you’ve been living under a rock, or at least subscribe to @realDonaldTrump’s Twitter feed, in the last week, you would know that he attempted to use his Mar-A-Lago property in Miami to host the international summit of economic leaders known as the G-7 Summit at the property. And in case you’re wondering, yes, this is an extremely terrible idea. For a number of reasons. Trump owns the property as well as several surrounding properties. Which means that he could ostensibly profit off it which would in effect violate the Emoluments Clause of the US Constitution. That is an impeachable offense as it is actually written in the Constitution. But in this day and age where fake news exists, Trump don’t play that way!

After days of relentless criticism, President Donald Trump abruptly reversed course late Saturday when he announced he would scrap plans to hold next year’s G-7 gathering of world leaders at one of his family’s resorts.

Trump made the change after members of Congress and government ethics experts accused him of violating the Constitution by holding the summit at his financially struggling Trump National Doral Miami resort.

"Based on both Media & Democrat Crazed and Irrational Hostility, we will no longer consider Trump National Doral, Miami, as the Host Site for the G-7 in 2020," Trump tweeted just 30 minutes after he defended the decision on Twitter.

It was a rare about-face for Trump on his businesses. He has spent nearly three years in office insisting he is allowed to visit and promote his properties around the globe. But his decision to hold the G-7 at Doral brought him criticism from even pundits on Fox News, his favorite television network and a growing number of his own party — the same lawmakers he needs to help him fight impeachment.
https://www.politico.com/news/2019/10/19/trump-says-his-doral-resort-will-no-longer-host-g7-summit-000292

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! So Trump was going to profit from world economic leaders staying at his own resorts. But then again he also threw the US Constitution under the bus because fuck it, that’s his philosophy. At least world leaders won’t be exposed to the bedbugs crawling under the mattresses at Doral. Bedbugs and Broomsticks, people. Bedbugs and broomsticks.

The hashtag #BedBugSummit trended on Twitter Friday due to allegations of past infestation at President Trump’s resort in Doral, Fla. The news resurfaced following the announcement that the U.S. will host next year’s Group of Seven (G-7) summit at the Trump property.

In the day after White House acting chief of staff Mick Mulvaney told reporters that the 2020 G-7 summit would take place at Trump National Doral, nearly 30,000 tweets had been sent using the hashtag.

Holly Figueroa O’Reilly, a songwriter and founder of the Blue Wave Crowdsource — an organization that aims to support Democratic candidates — tweeted a January 2017 Miami Herald article covering a lawsuit against Trump Doral over bedbugs.

"Bring the leaders of the free world to Doral, he said. What could go wrong, he said," she tweeted.
https://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/466486-bedbugsummit-trends-as-allegations-of-infestation-at-trump

First off, interesting use of the word “swarm” in the headline there. So where could the G-7 be held? There’s plenty of possibilities! Of course you could hold it at Hawaii or even Mackinac Island as some are suggesting. And we all know how much Mackinac Island loves them some Trump and Pence (see: Idiots #7-13 ) after Pence drove an 8 SUV motorcade through an island which had famously not allowed cars for the last 100 years. Proving once again… that bad guys drive black SUVs!

President Donald Trump's decision over the weekend to no longer use his Doral golf resort in Miami to host next year's G7 Summit may rekindle chances for holding the large international event on Mackinac Island.

A spokesperson for the island's famous Grand Hotel said Monday that earlier this year, a group in charge of selecting the G7 host site did visit and tour the 397-room hotel.

The hotel spokesperson declined any further comment or speculation on what the recent change of plans could mean for the Grand Hotel being a future G7 site.

A Washington Post reporter said last month that Michigan was one of 12 sites in eight states that President Trump's team is said to have "vetted" as potential G7 hosts.

On Monday, a representative for Gov. Gretchen Whitmer told the Free Press in a statement that "the state of Michigan is not aware of any formal vetting by the White House or the federal government to host the G7 Summit in Michigan at this time."
https://www.freep.com/story/money/business/michigan/2019/10/21/mackinac-island-possible-g-7-summit/4053384002/

Yeah the Grand Hotel pretty much is a giant house, much like Mar-A-Lago. Only difference is that Trump doesn’t own it! I’ve been there, prove me wrong, people! But if Mackinac Island doesn’t work, and it most likely won’t, how about Hawaii? It’s a nice, clean place that won’t offend anybody and our leaders are free to drive their SUVs on it!

Next year's G7 summit could be coming to the islands.

White House officials confirmed Hawaii was on the short list of locations being considered, prior to the President dropping plans to hold the international conference at his Miami resort.

There’s no word yet on a specific location the Trump administration may be interested in, but local tourism officials say besides Oahu –- Maui could have a shot at hosting the event.

“It’s not like the President’s unfamiliar with Hawaii. He has a presence here,” said Mufi Hannemann.

That’s one reason the head of the state’s Lodging and Tourism Association believes Hawaii stands a good chance of winning out over other destinations.
https://www.hawaiinewsnow.com/2019/10/22/hawaii-is-list-potential-sites-host-next-years-g-summit/

[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Contaminated Baby Food
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It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates!

Is the food being ingested by your baby contaminated? Well thanks to our nation’s distaste for corporations to abide by regulation rules, it very well could be. After Senator Chuck Schumer demanded an investigation into America’s food and baby food manufacturers, the results are far more horrifying than you could ever possibly imagine. And once again, nearly all of our problems go back to when America decided that corporations rule every aspect of our lives and are above the law. But the real answer is far more complicated than that.

The Senate’s top Democrat is calling on the Food and Drug Administration to examine a report that found dozens of baby food products contaminated with lead and other metals.

Sen. Chuck Schumer says Sunday the FDA must take more action to regulate the baby food industry. A study by Healthy Babies Bright Futures found the presence of heavy metals in 95% of the 168 baby foods that were tested.

The study found 95% of the food tested contained lead, arsenic, mercury or cadmium. It found one in four baby foods that were tested contained all four metals.

The New York senator says consumers “rightfully expect those foods to be undeniably safe, appropriately regulated and nutritiously sustaining.”

He says federal regulators should examine the study and release a public statement of their findings.
https://www.apnews.com/0c400acc0dc04bd18fc1b92928acc537

That’s actually what all the poison in your baby food might do to you. But what’s even scarier is that there’s more likely a chance that you’ll encounter contaminated food or have toxins in your food because of the fact that America doesn’t regulate anything. Regulations mean health inspections which means cleaner machines, and well, you get the rest.

A report out this week saying that baby food sold in the U.S. often contains potentially dangerous substances known as heavy metals has many parents wondering what, if anything, they can feed their babies, and just how serious the risks are.

Here’s what you need to know about the new research, what Consumer Reports and other experts say needs to be done to fix the problem, and, until then, some safer alternatives for infants.

The new study comes from Healthy Babies Bright Futures, a national alliance of scientists and child health advocacy organizations. The organization looked at 168 products across 61 brands, measuring the amount of arsenic, cadmium, lead, and mercury in one sample of each product. Thirteen categories of food were tested, including infant cereals, fruits, vegetables, juices, and snack foods, such as puffs.

Overall, they found at least one of the substances in 95 percent of the products. Such heavy metals have been linked to lower IQs and learning problems in children in the short term, and to type 2 diabetes, heart disease, certain cancers, and reproductive problems later in life.
https://www.consumerreports.org/food-safety/most-baby-foods-contain-arsenic-lead-and-other-heavy-metals/

Is the food going in or coming out? We’re not sure that we would want to know the answer to either question, since both are probably equally disgusting. Here’s the scary facts – it wasn’t just one brand or a few, it was over 150 different brands and foods that were found to be guilty of selling us toxic products, and these are aimed at babies! Babies! Yes, there is an extremely high probability that your baby food could be contaminated.

Researchers at Healthy Babies Bright Futures tested 168 different baby foods to see if they contained traces of heavy metals.

The study found that 95 percent of them contained arsenic, cadmium, lead, or mercury, and 25 percent contained all four toxic metals.

“It's not surprising to me and it's really sad that I have to say that,” says Stephanie Kemp.

Kemp owns Macro Mama Baby Food, LLC., a company promising fresh food by using organic and local produce. She had her first child in 2010 and realized there weren't any healthy food options for babies, so she decided to make her own.

“I don’t trust big companies because I don't know the manufacturing process. I don't know who chopped that up, who washed it, where did it really come from.”

Kemp is also a certified personal trainer and macrobiotic health coach so she understands the vital importance of proper nutrition for developing babies, but also knows the consequences that come putting toxic chemicals in their tiny bodies
https://fox17.com/news/local/mid-state-alternative-to-big-brand-baby-foods-after-toxic-metals-finding

At least Fat Stewie not being able to eat the food might be a bit of a savior because at least Fat Stewie won’t be ingesting any toxins. But the commonality of the products should not just alarm parents, but alarm anybody. We need proper food inspections and food inspectors who know what they are doing, how can these possibly pass the test? We will keep an eye out on this subject.

Sleep deprivation, diaper changes and late-night feedings are a few of the many common challenges faced by parents with a new baby at home. To ease the transition, parents often rely on the convenience of store-brand baby foods to provide the nutrients their children need in order to develop into healthy toddlers, young adults, teenagers and eventually adults. But there is a strong likelihood that nearly every can, jar and pouch of store-bought baby food contains traces of toxic heavy metals, including arsenic and lead, according to a new study.

The research, commissioned by Healthy Babies Bright Futures (HBBF) and detailed in a report published Thursday, tested 168 baby foods from major manufacturers in the U.S. for the presence of four heavy metals: arsenic, lead, mercury and cadmium.

The study found that 95 percent of the baby foods tested were contaminated by at least one of the four heavy metals, and 25 percent contained all four metals. Only nine of the 168 baby foods tested were not found to contain detectable traces of any of the four metals.

"Any amount of heavy metal can be potentially dangerous to a growing and developing baby," Dr. Jen Trachtenberg, MD, a nationally-recognized parenting expert, explained to Salon. "There is metal contaminants everywhere in the environment, water air and soil.”
https://www.salon.com/2019/10/19/95-percent-of-baby-foods-tested-contain-toxic-metals-that-could-harm-brain-development-study-finds/

That’s it this week for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

My fair congregation! Please, be seated! For the end of the world is upon us! Now, now, I should have lead you into it. But this is not that kind of church and this isn’t that kind of sermon. But if you listen to our brothers and sisters on the right, you would think that the world is going to systematically collapse and that we’re all going to die at any minute. Oh wait, we’re not gonna die. We’re going to get… raptured, at least half of us will get snapped up by the LAWRD JAYSUS. Wait, is he Thanos? Yeah I get those two stories confused. Now look, every religion has their own end of the world theories, even ours does! The difference is we don’t try to sell you $200,000 doomsday shelters.

Tucked into the the rolling Appalachian Mountains of western North Carolina, in a corner of the state brimming with churches and crosses in front yards, there is a hidden camp next to a quiet lake.

This private campsite is where over a thousand doomsday preppers gathered one weekend in late September for their annual Prepper Camp, a mash-up of a wilderness survival course-meets-summer camp for people who love guns, getting off grid, and God. The New York Times has referred to it as a "survivalist's Burning Man."

The group is made up mostly of gray-haired retirees and couples toting kids for a weekend away from home. They are nearly all white, staunchly conservative, and eager to share what they've learned about organic farming, raising livestock, tying ropes, fermenting cabbage, and filtering drinking water in the wild.

Yet this backwoods crowd makes it known that when the end of life as we know it arrives, whether by hurricane, flood, nuclear electromagnetic pulse (EMP), or exploding civil warfare, they won't be so friendly anymore. That's when they'll take to their predetermined secret locales, shoot would-be intruders, and do whatever it takes to protect their families and their stockpiled food.
https://www.insider.com/who-are-doomsday-preppers-preparing-for-the-apocalypse-2019-10

Oh wait, that was Terminator 3. So in North Carolina they are busy preparing for the apocalypse. But what are they preparing for? It’s not like there’s going to be a planet-destroying doomsday event any time soon. By the way if you want to see an actual doomsday cult in action, look no further than what happened at one of the hotels owned by the unholy, ungodly Dark One!

Last year’s American Priority conference held at a Marriott in Washington, D.C., was not very well attended, according to Politico. The conference’s organizer Alex Phillips said that security at the D.C. hotel was not as tight as the organizers would have liked.

“We didn’t find the area very hospitable and friendly to what we were trying to do,” said Phillips in an interview.

This year the group migrated south to the Trump property in Miami, which has been more receptive to its message, Phillips said. Of the hotels American Priority considered, Trump Doral was among the cheaper bids, he said.

This year’s preliminary agenda features a topic called “Is America in a Great Awakening?” — a slogan associated with the Internet conspiracy theory called QAnon, which alleges Trump is working with former special counsel Robert Mueller to take down a ring of “deep state” actors.

Phillips said the topic on the group’s website is a reference to a Trump speech in which the president called for a “great reawakening.”

QAnon was repeatedly referenced at the group’s 2018 event. Phillips likened followers of QAnon to people who are devoted to checking their horoscopes.
https://www.miamiherald.com/news/business/tourism-cruises/article233307232.html

That’s not how this works! And if you support the Dark One at this point after everything that we’ve been through in the last 3 years, you are clearly ignorant as to how this works! Thank you, I will take that one! And by the way recent signs of the end of the world point to… a math equation. That’s right – it’s a doomsday equation that has sent the believers of the apocalypse trying to find out what it means. But really, don’t ask the guy who created it how it works!

Despite wild claims from the Daily Express, the world isn't going to come to an end today (April 23).

Quoting conspiracy theorist David Meade, the Express said a passage in the Bible, Revelations 12:1-2, "suggests the end of the world is imminent, with Earth set to be destroyed on April 23."

Right in the middle of the NBA playoffs? How rude.

The Bible passage (which of course doesn't specify April 23 as Doomsday), also signals the start of the Rapture and the second coming of Jesus Christ, Meade said.

He also said the position of the planets and constellations is another harbinger of doom, but Space.com said Meade's predicted sky arrangement is totally wrong.

The wild theory mentions the planet Nibiru, aka Planet X, will appear on April 23. Meade claims it will then pass the Earth in October, causing the start of the Rapture with huge volcanoes and volcanic eruptions due to its gravitational force.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/2018/04/13/no-world-isnt-ending-later-month-we-hope/515516002/

Well, of course the Daily Express is where one turns to for quality conspiracy theory based journalism, and what is it about the ultra radical right wing and conspiracy theories? We might have to do a deep dive on that subject in a future edition. But really when it comes to predicting the apocalypse or doomsday theories, just don’t. Save your brain waves for something more productive!

Score another accomplishment for the Trump administration: An increase in Doomsday Preppers. In your face, those of you who say he can’t get anything done.

The Washington Post recently featured a West Virginia survivalist camp where 100 people have already bought memberships so they will be able to ride out any of a number of horrific disasters. Sort of like an apocalypse timeshare.

They say they are prepared for the worst — famine, disease, chemical warfare, the New York Yankees winning the World Series.

Fortitude Ranch has won the endorsement of David Jones, whom the Post calls a “celebrity prepper” (which strikes me as being like a “celebrity hermit”) for his podcasts and television appearances. Like others, he worries that “the veneer of civilization is very thin.” Funny. He says that like it’s a bad thing.

Drew Miller, who runs the camp, says in an emergency, it can hold up to 500 people crammed together in buried culverts, feeding off of a stock of canned and dried foodstuffs.
https://www.heraldmailmedia.com/opinion/tim_rowland/betting-on-doomsday/article_960d22f2-fe58-5345-96cd-dee7f788c618.html

There you have it folks, the Dark One has sparked an increase in people who are preparing for the end of days! As predicted in our Good Book and every other Good Book out there! Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]This Fucking Guy: Chris McDonald
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This week’s This Fucking Guy is conservative Christian right-wing firebrand podcaster Chris McDonald, who is not to be confused with Christopher MacDonald, the somewhat charming yet extremely angry Shooter McGavin, the golfing antagonist to Adam Sandler’s Happy Gilmore. No, Chris McDonald is the host of a podcast called “The MC Files”. And no, where the motto of the X-Files was “The Truth Is Out There”, there’s literally no ounces of truth in Chris McDonald’s podcast. In fact all you’ll probably find on this podcast is a bunch of batshit crazy pro Trump conspiracy theories and maybe some advertisements for nutritional supplements. Which makes us wonder what the hell are they putting in these supplements? Well they make you say batshit crazy stuff like this!

Right-wing commentator and radical conspiracy theorist Chris McDonald streamed a special edition of his “The MC Files” program this morning in response to the news that Democratic Rep. Elijah Cummings had died. McDonald and his guest, Maryland pastor Stacey Shiflett, spent the entire program attacking Cummings as corrupt, unbiblical, and ungodly, and asserting that God had taken his life because of his opposition to President Donald Trump.

“We know the Bible,” McDonald said. “You’ve got a leader that has been in office for over 30 years, that opened the door on unfettered abortion in this country. His civil rights icon status was a joke because he did nothing to bring rights to his people; all he did was divide, all he did was play the race card.”

McDonald said that Cummings was a corrupt and lawless leader who waged “a cooked, deceptive, demonic attempt” to take down Trump.

“Everything that he’s done has been nothing but trying to take this president out,” he said. “I believe that God had had enough, and God moved.”
https://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/god-had-had-enough-chris-mcdonald-says-god-killed-rep-elijah-cummings-for-opposing-trump/

No, no you don’t know the Bible. At fucking all! Yeah that might be one of the worst reactions to the death of Elijah Cummings. And really, that “pastor” ought to be ashamed of themselves! Seriously if you think that God wanted this to happen because people oppose Trump, you might want to read that book again because I’m pretty sure that’s not how this works! And it gets better! Yes I did a deep dive on this moron searching through RWW because well, I did so you don’t have to! In fact if you want a window into the mind of a super paranoid RW Christian, look no further than this. I swear we need to do a whole edition on the crazy things Trump supporters actually believe. Like this:

Right-wing commentator and radical conspiracy theorist Chris McDonald closed out his “The MC Files” program last night by warning that God will destroy the Democratic Party for opening an impeachment inquiry against President Trump.

“There is a spiritual component to this folks,” McDonald said. “The Lord of Heaven is looking down on this travesty, he’s looking down on this political witch hunt, he’s looking down on this false accusation, this sowing discord among the brethren tearing the country to pieces; these are the things that God hates. And whenever a political party is invested, like the Democratic Party is, in things that God hates, they’re headed for destruction.”

“They are coming up against a power that they do not want to come up against,” he continued. “All the atheists in the Democratic Party are going to find out very soon that God does exist and he’s going to deal with this in the strictest of ways … There is going to be hell to pay when this is all over with and it’s not going to end bad for the president, it’s going to end bad for these people that are doing it.”

McDonald likened to situation to the Book of Esther in the Bible, in which Haman, an adviser to the king, plotted to destroy the Jews, only to be hung on the gallows that he had intended to use on his rival, Mordecai.
https://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/chris-mcdonald-god-will-destroy-the-democrats-for-trying-to-impeach-trump/

So if you watch or listen to the MC Files – there’s two things t that are perfectly clear. 1. Democrats hate God because we hate Trump. Hey, they figured us out! 2. God will smite those who don’t agree with the Christian right 100%. That’s pretty much a cult. And Chris McDonald is of course what a glimpse into being a member of this cult is like. Just watch his show and you’ll get not only shit like this, but you’ll get insights from people like everyone’s favorite Liberty University “prophet”, Mark Taylor!

Mark Taylor, the so-called “firefighter prophet” and a radical right-wing conspiracy theorist about whom Liberty University made a movie last year, appeared on Chris McDonald’s “The MC Files” program earlier this week, where he declared that those who criticize him are under demonic control.

Taylor, who has repeatedly warned that those who mock or criticize him are literally putting their lives at risk because God will strike them down for disrespecting his prophetic calling, said that some people are “obsessed” with attacking him because they are controlled by a Jezebel spirit.

“I’ve got people now attacking me,” he said. “They’re obsessed. Now, you have to ask yourself, ‘What is the spirit behind this obsession to attack a prophetic voice?’ It’s Jezebel. Every bit of it is Jezebel. Jezebel was obsessed with taking down Elijah. Period. And it’s to shut the true prophetic voice up.”

“These people that do this are driven by forces that are greater than themselves, they’re driven by demonic forces,” Taylor added. “You cannot reason with demons.”
https://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/mark-taylor-says-his-critics-are-driven-by-demonic-forces/

Hey it’s always the ones you least suspect! But really this fucking guy is crazy! And anyone who has previous “This Fucking Guy” Mark Taylor on his program is a beacon of sanity and intelligence. Yeah thanks for the sarcasm tag, sound effects guy! But this might be one of my favorite points of the MC Files, you know how the right loves them some pedophilia comparisons? Well there’s only one person who’s allowed to make them!

Near the end of his “The MC Files” program on Monday night, radical conspiracy theorist Chris McDonald criticized some of his viewers for filling the comments on his livestream broadcast with baseless allegations that Vice President Mike Pence has some involvement with pedophilia.

“You can believe what you want to believe about Vice President Mike Pence,” McDonald said, “but I would prefer your comments not to come into this chatroom accusing things that you have no knowledge of. It’s slander and it’s not right and we’re not going to tolerate it here on The MC Files.”

“I don’t think that it is fair to his family and it is not fair to him,” McDonald added. “If this was you in his place and somebody had an ax to grind with you … and they get out there and they put your name in a tweet and say, ‘You’re a pedophile,’ let me tell you something, you wouldn’t like that. None of us would like that. With no proof, nothing, just say it just to say it. You wouldn’t like that. So just understand that tonight that we’re not going to do that on this show. We don’t do that stuff here.”

“We are going to protect the integrity of the show and not become slanderers and people that trash other people without proof,” he said. “You don’t take a matter that you don’t have any proof of and you repeat it and it becomes gossip and it becomes innuendo and it becomes slander. And let me tell you something: You don’t want to get on the wrong side of that because it’s the devil’s tool, that is the devil’s workshop, and people are destroyed by it. And we are not going to do it.”

“We as believers and we as people of faith cannot do the devil’s bidding with our tongues,” McDonald declared. “We are not going to become slanderers. We are not going to slander people.”
https://www.rightwingwatch.org/post/only-chris-mcdonald-is-allowed-to-use-his-show-to-slander-people-with-allegations-of-pedophilia/

Yeah so you’re not going to slander people, except when you do slander them. That’s Chris McDonald, this week’s:

[font size="8"]Unpopular Opinions
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One of the principal campaign points that has driven the Bernie Sanders campaign has been the student loan crisis. And one of the biggest corporations that has been swindling and grifting consumers until we’re hung out to dry has been Sallie Mae, one of the largest student loan providers in the country. Our student loan crisis is currently hovering at about a trillion dollars in debt. Now in an era where corporations are people and giant banks like Goldman Sachs are making hundreds of billions a year and giving it all to themselves, it really hurts to see when stories like this break. Because we all know where it’s leading.

Student loan company Sallie Mae flew more than 100 sales team employees to Hawaii earlier this year to celebrate $5 billion in student loans, as the student debt crisis has reached $1.6 trillion.

In August, Sallie Mae brought the employees to Maui’s luxury Fairmont resort on Wailea beach as it celebrated a record-high year in sales, NBC News reports.

The $5 billion in student loans went to 374,000 borrowers, totaling nearly $13,400 per person.

“We said, ‘Hey, look, Maui is a pretty nice spot.’ And so if you wanted to stay a few days or want to bring your family, that’s up to you,” Sallie Mae CEO Ray Quinlan told NBC News.

He added that the venture was not an “incentive trip” but instead a “sales get-together for all of our salespeople.” The company has taken similar retreats since it was founded in the 1970s, NBC News reports.
https://thehill.com/policy/finance/466492-sallie-mae-execs-flew-over-100-employees-to-hawaii-to-celebrate-record-5

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Another corporation that’s celebrating off the course of human misery! Now let’s let that number sink in: $5 BILLION. And you thought your car loan on your 2020 Subaru Legacy was insane! So we get saddled with debt that we might never pay back, they get to take trips on the company dime. In case you’re wondering how insulting this is, well, look no further.

As Americans across the country struggle to pay off their student loan debts—a whopping $1.6 trillion nationally—often working multiple jobs and sometimes declaring bankruptcy to protect what little assets they have left, the people authorizing those loans at one of the largest lending companies in the United States, Sallie Mae, are getting rewarded with a free trip to Maui.

Originally reported by NBC Nightly News with Lester Holt, Sallie Mae flew 100 employees to Hawaii in August for a little fun in the sun to celebrate the $5 billion in student loans they sold to more than 370,000 people. Meanwhile, of the nearly 45 million Americans who have some kind of student debt, according to Forbes magazine, many struggle to pay back the loans because of alleged suspicious lending practices (like engaging in subprime lending practices and authorizing loans to people who likely cannot pay them back) on behalf of lenders like Sallie Mae.

Paige McDaniel, 39, described to NBC News the reaction she received from Navient—a lending company created as an off-shoot from Sallie Mae in 2014 (yet financially a separate independent company from Sallie Mae)—when she was hit with a $1,500 a month bill for the $120,000 loan she took out to get her Master's degree.

"When I told them that, you know, I couldn't afford that, could we make some payment arrangements, they essentially said, 'So sorry, we'll put a lien on your house and garnish your wages if you don't make those payments,'" McDaniel told NBC News.
https://www.newsweek.com/sallie-mae-executives-celebrate-hawaii-americans-are-crippled-student-loan-debt-1466100

I can picture the Hawaii retreat with Sallie Mae executives going down something like that! Now here’s where we take the unpopular opinion. This is the post Citizens United world that we are talking about here, where corporations are people and money is free speech. How about this? Since corporations are people, can we start executing some of them? Perhaps if we rose up as one and slayed Sallie Mae and Goldman Sachs, it might have other bank executives running scared, because fuck them! Oh and by the way in case you were wondering, yes, Sallie Mae has figured out a way to make your unpayable student loan that much worse! Just add Visa and Mastercard!

For those struggling with student debt, a new credit card is hardly the answer.

Yet, lender Sallie Mae is banking on a few new offerings specifically geared toward recent grads with college loans.

As more people in the U.S. struggle to keep up with their credit card and student debt, the student loan lender recently rolled out three new cash-back cards with Mastercard — Ignite, Accelerate and Evolve.

The Accelerate card comes with 1.25% cash back on all purchases plus an extra incentive for student loan borrowers: a 25% bonus on cash-back rewards that are used to pay down any federal or private student loan.

With Ignite, cardholders earn 1% back on purchases and a 25% bonus on cash-back rewards after making six consecutive on-time payments.
https://www.cnbc.com/2019/10/15/sallie-mae-launches-credit-cards-aimed-at-student-loan-borrowers.html

That’s right – you get 1% cash back on all your major purchases. Just a friendly reminder from the good folks at Sallie Mae just how fucked your credit is! 1% back on a $13,000 loan is… $130. I want to take a trip to Hawaii, don’t I need a credit card for that? Oh shit!! Yeah that really makes me wonder why we don’t rise up as one and slay them! Because then they pull shit like this! By the way students, did you fill out your FAFSA yet? Because you’re missing out on valuable financial aid!

As of Oct. 1, college-bound students can apply for their share of $150 billion in federal student aid, including grants, loans and work-study. To apply, they need to complete the Free Application for Federal Student Aid, or the FAFSA.

FAFSA funds are distributed on a first-come, first-served basis.

Sallie Mae recently polled 2,000 undergraduate students and parents and asked if they submitted the FAFSA. According to Sallie Mae’s analysis, during the 2018-2019 school year, only 25% of undergraduate students completed the FAFSA the first month it was open, and just 77% of undergraduate students completed it at all.

By not filling out the FAFSA, American college students are missing out. Federal grants do not need to be repaid, federal student loans have low interest rates, and work-study programs can be a convenient way to simultaneously fund an education and build a resume.
https://www.cnbc.com/2019/10/11/if-you-dont-fill-out-fafsa-you-miss-out-on-billions-in-financial-aid.html

[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
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Hit it!!!

Of course you know by now that people are people and people are dumb. This is one of my favorite segments because there are so many stupid and crazy people out there that you could easily interchange any of them and they would be about the same. Of course it always helps that the Sunshine State remains one of the craziest places in the world. So who is stupid this week? Well I want to start with this story coming from… international waters! You would think that cruise ships would be rife with stupidity, and there’s plenty of things that can go wrong on a cruise ship. And then there’s selfies. Really, stop it with this shit.

They get too close to wild animals. They perch on statues. They pose at the edge of a cliff hours after a woman’s deadly fall.

Stories abound of tourists dangerously eager for the perfect photograph — and a group that caters to travelers has had enough.

Cruise company Royal Caribbean said this week it has banned a passenger for life after she was spotted “recklessly” standing on a balcony railing for a picture. The guest and her companion, who helped with the shot, disembarked in Jamaica “as a result of their actions,” the company said in a statement to media. The companion is banned, too.

A fellow passenger on the Allure of the Seas ship told CNN he witnessed the risky photo shoot from his balcony and brought it to the crew’s attention. He documented the transgression in a grainy picture of his own posted online that shows a woman gazing out at the ocean in a blue bathing suit, hands held above her head.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/travel/2019/10/20/cruise-company-bans-passenger-life-after-she-recklessly-stands-railing-photo/

Next up – dumb judges! Yes, that’s a new category here on People Are Dumb. Of course the opioid crisis is one of the most devastating stories that affects everyone in the country and people are demanding answers as to how this got so out of hand. But this is one of those cases where if you fuck up that badly, you might as well do so in a way that makes you question how the fuck you did it.

The Oklahoma judge who recently ordered pharmaceutical giant Johnson & Johnson to pay $572 million for its role in the state's opioid crisis says he made a mathematical error when calculating the judgment.

As part of the landmark verdict in August, Judge Thad Balkman set aside $107,683,000 to help combat neonatal abstinence syndrome, or NAS. The problem -- he added three too many zeroes and meant to award $107,683.

The state had asked for nearly $17.2 billion to compensate for the deaths of state residents.

On Tuesday, Balkman agreed with Johnson and Johnson regarding the error. "That's the last time I use that calculator," he said.

It's not clear how this will impact the overall judgment.

This was the first state trial attempting to hold a pharmaceutical company accountable for one of the worst epidemics in history.

The judge still needs to decide if the court will continue to monitor the opioid crisis for the next 20 years and potentially award more money to the state. He also needs to decide if Johnson & Johnson should receive credit for the $300 million Oklahoma will be receiving from Teva Pharmaceuticals and Purdue Pharma -- those two companies settled with the state before the judge's initial ruling.
https://www.cnn.com/2019/10/15/health/oklahoma-opioid-judgment-miscalculation/index.html

Yeah sure, blame the calculator! That would be like blaming your bankruptcy on the pen you used to sign the checks! Next up, we go to the Volunteer State of Tennessee. Yes, we will get to some crazy Florida stuff but not just yet. Look, we’ve all been desperate for money but has anyone ever resorted to favors from… your grandma? I mean really what the fuck???

A Tennessee man forcibly removed $10 from his own grandmother’s undergarments after she refused his demand for cash, according to a robbery complaint.

Jared Otte, a 19-year-old Memphis resident, entered the 63-year-old victim’s home in late-August and “demanded she give him cash,” according to a complaint affidavit.

Otte’s grandmother told police that when she declined to hand over any money, Otte pushed her onto on the bed and “held her down, raised her dress, and removed $10 from her undergarments.”

The woman, a detective reported, “suffered bruising on her arms and leg during this incident.” The complaint does not indicate why Otte needed the cash.

Pictured above, Otte was arrested Tuesday on a felony robbery charge and booked into the Shelby County jail. He was released from custody yesterday after posting $10,000 bond.
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/crime/grandmas-drawers-214039

I’m sure that was probably Nana’s reaction too! Ah, now it’s time for news from America’s most penis shaped state. Yup, there’s plenty of crazy stories of stupid people and stupid criminals coming out of the Sunshine State. So for this story we go to of course Orlando, where if you call 911, you’d better have a good reason for calling 911 but reporting to the cops that someone stole your weed, yeah, you might want to chalk that one up to a loss!

A Florida man who kept calling 911 about a roommate who “stole his weed” was asked to please top calling 911, according to the Pasco County Sheriff’s Department.

In a video posted to the sheriff’s department Twitter page, Sheriff’s Deputy N. Zalva said, “The guy’s calling in saying his roommate stole his weed, $20 worth and he’s upset and he keeps calling 911, so I had to give him a call and tell him to stop calling about his weed.”

The video was part of a Tweet Along held Saturday night.

Deputy Zalva did a followup video in which he said, "I called him to let him know not to call the sheriff’s office to report his drugs. He started to freak out a little on the phone, and then hung up on me shortly after.”

Read more: https://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/florida/os-ne-florida-man-calls-911-roommate-stole-his-weed-20191014-vcadddljjva4dgtz2dzlniodrq-story.html

Hey don’t get mad, get Tegridy! Tastes like shit, you won’t care! Finally this week for People Are Dumb, of course it takes place in the Sunshine State. And here’s the thing – you know how Florida is one of the states that has that controversial Stand Your Ground law? Well, apparently, shocker, Stand Your Ground doesn’t apply to AK-47s and hand grenades!

Video released Tuesday shows a Florida store owner firing an AK-47 to shoot an unarmed customer after a verbal dispute on Christmas Eve 2017.

Saf Ahmad, the owner of a Kwik Pic convenience store in Lauderhill, Florida, was arrested in December 2017 on a charge of aggravated battery with a deadly weapon after shooting Jason Morris, according to a Broward County Sheriff's Office report.

The store owner has claimed that he fired the AK 47 in self-defense after Morris got into his car and threw something, later identified as a bottle of Castor Oil, at the store.

Ahmad's next hearing is set for November 1.

Surveillance video from inside and outside the store released by the store owner's attorneys shows the confrontation and the moment Ahmad fired the AK-47.

Morris is seen on the video getting into a verbal disagreement with a store employee and kicking over a large trash can into the store before exiting. He then threw another trash can from outside the store before he got into his car, the video shows.
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/video-captures-florida-store-owner-firing-customer-ak-47-n1064036

That’s what happens when Florida Man attempts to logic his way out of a situation! That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]Keeping Up With The Candidates Ep. 12: Tusli Gabbard WTF
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Welcome back to our 2020 voters’ guide Keeping Up With The Candidates! Where there are 24 candiates running. Actually I’m being told it’s just down to Elizabeth Warren, Bernie Sanders, and a cardboard cutout of former vice president Al Gore. Well OK maybe not that dramatic. But in the interest of your favorite spy and super hero movies, one candidate has gone rogue. And that’s Hawaii democrat and possible Russian asset Tulsi Gabbard. So what made her go off the rails this weekend? Well there’s plenty of blame that could be passed around for this. Ah, really, fuck it, I’m just blaming Tulsi for this mess because well, I’m out of fucks to give. Well, there’s one man endorsing Gabbard and it’s not going to be good for anybody.

Democratic presidential hopeful Rep. Tulsi Gabbard has apparently gotten an endorsement she said she can do without — from former KKK leader David Duke.

The 68-year-old white supremacist and former GOP Louisiana state senator plastered a banner on his Twitter page prominently featuring a photograph of the Hawaiian lawmaker, the New York Post reported.

“Tulsi Gabbard for President,” it blares, along with the tagline: “Finally a candidate who will actually put America First rather than Israel First!”

“Tulsi Gabbard is currently the only Presidential candidate who doesn’t want to send White children off to die for Israel,” the former Grand Wizard tweeted his more than 50,000 followers along with a photograph of Gabbard meeting a US service member and his child.

But Gabbard wasted no time in lashing back at Duke and rejected his backing.
https://www.marketwatch.com/story/rep-tulsi-gabbard-gets-2020-endorsement-from-david-duke-2019-10-19

Seriously, Tulsi is just a red hat away from going full MAGA on this campaign. I mean she’s already checked all the boxes including appearing on Russia Today and an endorsement from white supremacists over Isreal support. And in case you’re wondering what may have attracted the attention of David Duke to the Gabbard campaign, it might very well be this:

Hawaii Rep. Tulsi Gabbard was the subject of several trending topics on Twitter on Saturday morning. However, her recent spat with former presidential candidate, First Lady and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton seemed to cause former Ku Klux Klan leader David Duke to trend after users remembered that he had announced support for Gabbard’s candidacy earlier this year.

“Tulsi Gabbard is currently the only Presidential candidate who doesn’t want to send White children off to die for Israel,” Duke said on Twitter in February, per The New York Post.

However, many were quick to point out that Gabbard had previously rejected Duke’s support. In a statement issued in February, she said she disavowed Duke’s white supremacist views.

“Publicizing Duke’s so-called ‘endorsement’ is meant to distract from my message: that I will end regime-change wars, work to end the new cold war and take us away from the precipice of a nuclear war, which is a greater danger now than ever before,” Gabbard said, per The New York Post.
https://www.inquisitr.com/5700334/david-duke-endorse-tulsi-gabbard/

Yeah seriously… WTF. The question on the table here is – is Tulsi Gabbard a Russian agent? Well, her flat out denying that she might be a Russian agent is clearly the sort of thing someone like that would say out loud in public. And come on, using the term “regime change”? I mean where have we heard that term before? I can’t quite put my finger on it.

“The New York Times and CNN have also smeared veterans like myself for calling for an end to this regime-change war,” she said, adding that the Times put out an article calling her a Russian asset, and claiming that a CNN commentator said the same that very morning.

“Completely despicable,” Gabbard said of such allegations.

Gabbard’s campaign has been plagued by accusations that she is either aligned with or supported by the Russians. It has been widely and repeatedly reported that Russia supports her candidacy. It is also undeniable that her more isolationist platform aligns more closely with Russia’s preference for American foreign policy than that of any other candidate.

Even as she attempts to distance herself, Gabbard has been admittedly popular with both the Kremlin and people on the far- and alt-right. She was endorsed by David Duke. The Times article inspired a pearl-clutching defense of Gabbard by none other than deeply conservative Washington Examiner.

Accordingly, most people weren’t convinced by Gabbard’s disgust over the assertion that she’s working for Moscow. They also couldn’t quite figure out why she’d bring up one of the biggest criticisms of her candidacy.
https://www.dailydot.com/layer8/tulsi-gabbard-russian-asset/

I think that’s more the question on everyone’s minds – what the actual fuck? And by the way why do the far right conservative media and neo Nazis love Tulsi? The answer might be more complicated than you would think. But yeah she’s really just a red hat and an R endorsement away from going full MAGA, and you never, ever want to go full MAGA.

The latest Democratic candidate to enter the 2020 race has an unexpected base of support: The far right and conservative media.

Rep. Tulsi Gabbard (D-HI), who announced her candidacy last Friday, has cultivated a fandom among the right by bashing fellow Democrats and espousing views that break with the party line.

Since taking office in 2013, Gabbard, 37, has established a reputation as an unorthodox politician. While holding familiar Democratic positions on environmental issues, health care, and gun control, Gabbard was a frequent critic of President Obama’s foreign policy, met with Syrian dictator Bashar al-Assad, and has questioned whether he used chemical weapons on his own citizens.

Once discussed among party insiders as a rising star who signed on to be a vice chair at the Democratic National Committee, she quit in protest during the 2016 election and endorsed Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-VT).

When she ran for re-election in 2018, she had the backing of liberal groups including the AFL-CIO and Planned Parenthood, yet she was briefly considered as a potential member for Trump’s cabinet, and cheered on his diplomatic overtures to North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un.
https://www.thedailybeast.com/why-conservative-media-and-the-far-right-love-tulsi-gabbard-for-president

[font size="4"]Next Week:[/font]

Next week we’ll get back to business by talking about Beto O’Rourke’s controversial gun buy back program!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]Sturgill Simpson[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen my next guest is country music’s anti-hero! His latest album is called “Sound And Fury”. Playing his song “Make Art, Not Friends”, give it up for Sturgill Simpson!
https://media.pitchfork.com/photos/5d8d0e675d366d000838d1eb/1:1/w_320/sturgill_soundandfury.jpg

Thank you Las Vegas! This was fun! We’re off to Oregon State next for our big Halloween specia! See you next week!

Credits

Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: University Of Nevada, Las Vegas, Las Vegas, NV
Special Thanks To: UNLV
Holy Shit Gospel Choir: Fremont St. Baptist Church Choir, Las Vegas, NV
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October 16, 2019

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #7-15: Dancing With The Czars Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #7-15: Dancing With The Czars Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! Websites, please stop asking me to review your updated privacy policy because we both know that ain’t happening! Wait, what do you mean that you sold my account to a call center in New Mexico and my account has been hacked? Damn! I should have read the privacy policy! What’s up Arizona State? How you guys doing? Fucking good? Yeah! So you know that it’s very rare that I start with a Top 10 update. Thank you sir! I always love the one guy in the back who yells out “wooooooo!!!”. But remember back in Idiots #7-3, I know that was only 3 months ago but it does feel like an eternity doesn’t it? The story I specifically want to talk about is that remember the Ford dealer who gave you a flag, a gun and a Bible when you bought a new F-150? And then Ford put the kibosh on that faster than you could say “Jesus walks”? Well guess what? There’s another dealer trying the same stunt! Yes, we go to South Carolina for this one where another Ford dealership is giving away a flag, a gun and a Bible with the purchase of their cars. Yes, that is happening again! Well, summer might be over - it’s too early for rerun season! I mean really, first of all way to placate the stereotype guys. And my other favorite part of this – just like the last guy, they say this is “non political”. Bullshit! You just made it political! Guns and Bibles are political statements! And where is Ford in this? They put the kibosh on the last guy who tried but this one? Not a peep because apparently they exploited a loophole that allowed for “local promotions”. Well, this one stinks and we are going to keep an eye on it, especially since we're not doing People Are Dumb this week. That’s enough of the intro, we got a lot of idiocy to get to. But first John Oliver trolls Accuweather by using their own imagery to explain why nominating their CEO to head the National Weather Service is a terrible idea:

Holy shit, Trump is losing it big time. in the first slot, is of course Donald Trump (1) we have to talk about the insane video that aired at his resort during a pro-Trump event in which it was a doctored scene from one of my favorite movies of the last few years, this is shockingly evil. In the second slot, is of course the guy who we currently call president, Donald J. Trump (2) and he may have jumpstarted World War III when he pulled US troops from the Syrian border because, reasons, and his explanation is even more jaw-dropping! At slot #3 this week, is also Donald Trump (3) and we have to talk about his relentless mocking of disgraced FBI agent Peter Strzok at his Minneapolis rally, but the scary thing is that these rallies are actually working. Taking the fourth slot this week, is Trump’s crooked fixer attorney Rudy Giuliani (4) and is anyone shocked that his aides may have violated campaign finance laws? Anyone? Bueller? Well, we’re not either! Taking the 5th slot this week – is our weekly investigative piece, Top 10 Investigates (5). The city of Stockton in California has a rather interesting proposal to help people deal with their financial woes, and we will tell you about their new free money program and what is entitled! In slot #6 this week of course is our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in "Holy Shit" (6), and this week our resident pastor is back from attending the Values Voters Summit. How long before he casts an exorcism on the Unholy Dark One? For the seventh slot this week, is our favorite segment “Beating A Dead Horse”. Is it OK to show your support for the protestors in Hong Kong? Well, in a perfect example of life imitating art, China is censoring people’s opinions on the Hong Kong protests, and South Park called them out on it, and the result is as utterly predictable as you might expect. In the 8th slot this week, after the Atlanta Braves fail to advance in the playoffs again, we ask how their obnoxious chant known as the “Tomahawk Chop” is still a thing. Taking the #9 (NEIN!!!) slot this week we have a new “I Need A Drink” and we’re going to combine two separate entries and tell you about a fun new way to drink whiskey and a fun new way to take your frustrations out at sporting events! Finally this week, we have “Keeping Up With The Candidates” and we’re going to talk about what went down in the Democratic Debates last night and there was quite a lot to unpack there! And the palate cleanser for all this madness, we have some live music from a band who I am personally a fan of, Fitz & The Tantrums! Really buy their new album "All The Feels" or you are no friend of this show! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

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[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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Where does the line between creating a meme and threatening violence go? Well, one of my favorite movies as you know has been Kingsman: The Secret Service. And if you are not aware of the plot of that movie, the movie’s villain, Richmond Valentine, played by Samuel L. Jackson, uses a high-pitched frequency found in cell phone SIM cards that was discovered by Professor Arnold, played by Mark Hamill. This frequency makes people go on an absolutely batshit crazy destructive rampage. One of the scenes in that movie involves Valentine testing out this frequency on a church full of worshippers, to which Harry Hart, played by Colin Firth, proceeds to shoot up the church, to the tune of Lynyrd Skynyrd’s classic song Freebird. So this movie is back in the news this week because this happened.

The latest incarnation in President Trump's years-long antagonism with the media and Hollywood has raised more than a few eyebrows, after organizers at a pro-Trump event edited him into a particularly violent scene from 2014's Kingsman: The Secret Service. The scene depicts Trump in place of a character played by Colin Firth, as he slaughters a church filled with dozens of enemies - whose own faces have been replaced with political and media critics of the President.

In the original Kingsman, Harry Hart (Firth's character) is inside the church, which is located in the Deep South, in order to follow a lead on a hate group. When the movie's villain Valentine (played by Samuel L. Jackson) uses mind control to turn the churchgoers against Hart, he's forced to shoot his way through at least three dozen people. The scene, like much of the violence in the Kingsman franchise, is mildly graphic, but that violence takes on an undeniably different meaning in this edited version.

The edited Kingsman scene presents President Trump shooting the superimposed images of figures like Kathy Griffin and former President Barack Obama, as well as logos representing various media companies such as CNN. It was made by and presented at the American Priority Conference, an explicitly pro-Trump alternative to the Conservative Political Action Conference, which was held at Trump Doral Miami, a hotel owned by the President. Attendees included his son Donald Trump, Jr. and former press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders, but not Trump himself. The White House has since stated that the President "strongly condemns the video" based on what's been relayed to him.
https://screenrant.com/president-donald-trump-kingsman-movie-edit-press-killing/

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! We’re not going to show the GIF because we don’t want to encourage that sort of thing. But yeah, really fuck these people. It’s pretty clear that they want us all dead, so yeah fuck you. Maybe you should take a page from Mr. Hart here, manners maketh man. Let me show you what that means. But how far does this go? Well shit, even Geraldo thinks this is going too far, and this is the man who claimed to know what was in Al Capone’s vault!

The hosts of Fox News’ The Five this afternoon mostly dismissed the outrage over the video of President Trump edited into the infamous church scene from Kingsman depicting him killing the “fake news.”

Geraldo Rivera, however, said it went too far for him:

“I was very, very outraged by Kathy Griffin when she had the head of the president, remember, and she was excoriated for it, almost wrecked her career, which rebounded because Trump hatred was sufficient and brought her back and made her popular again. But I think it’s very dangerous when you start going there. I don’t like it. It’s not funny. It may be satire, but it’s a bridge too far for me. I think that you’ve got to, you know, you have to condemn it and have no tolerance for it.”

“It is not inciting violence,” Jeanine Pirro responded.

“I’m not a shrink, I don’t know,” Rivera said.

“It’s a legal question, inciting violence,” Pirro said.

“I don’t like when the president is the target of the parody and I don’t like it when the president is the parody-er,” Rivera said.
https://www.mediaite.com/tv/geraldo-rivera-that-trump-video-a-bridge-too-far-for-me-you-have-to-condemn-it/

That is a good question! And what’s really ironic is that these are the same people who thought that Kathy Griffin’s famous severed head photo was a threat to Trump but this video? Ah, come on, it’s just a harmless video! And you know what? Why don’t we ask Ms. Griffin what she thinks about this unbelievable atrocity?

A violent video recently shown at a Trump resort shows a gunman made to look like President Trump hunting down the president’s critics and members of the media.

The video was shown last week during a conference of the president’s supporters at the Trump National Doral Miami, the New York Times reported Sunday evening.

The Times said it obtained the video from a man who attended the conference and recorded the footage with his phone. The clip was posted online and is disturbing.

The video includes a logo for Trump’s 2020 re-election campaign and shows the gunman walking through a church, shooting, stabbing and beating members of the news media, celebrities, and Trump’s political rivals. The Trump campaign told the Times it had nothing to do with the video.

“That video was not produced by the campaign, and we do not condone violence,” said campaign spokesman Tim Murtaugh.

The footage includes a scene from the film Kingsman: The Secret Service.

The video shows Trump’s head on the body of a man who walks through the “Church of Fake News,” and opens fire on people resembling his critics. The footage is set to music and shows the gunman targeting parishioners whose faces have been replaced by the logos of media organizations..
https://deadline.com/2019/10/video-shown-at-trump-resort-shows-presidential-look-alike-shooting-critics-1202759269/

Oh come on, you know Trump saw this and laughed his ass off. I mean this is the guy who threw Paper Towel brand paper towels at the Puerto Rico victims! Paper Towel brand paper towels: For the 1st world leader who treats 1st world disasters with a third world budget! Seriously though, Trump, we suspect, is the kind of guy who gets his jollies from torturing puppies and denying his employees bathroom privileges. So who made this video? Well there’s plenty of people who we could point fingers at, but one thing is perfectly clear who’s behind it:

The creator of a gruesome video that showed a fake President Donald Trump killing journalists and political opponents and that was played at a meeting of a pro-Trump group over the weekend is part of a loose network of right-wing provocateurs with a direct line to the White House.

The unidentified creator of the video operates under the name of “The GeekzTeam” and has proclaimed on Twitter to be a “red blooded American with ZERO tolerance for the liberal agenda.” Like many in the online group, the person specializes in creating pro-Trump internet content, often by remixing the president’s image into clips from popular movies and television shows.

Another of the provocateurs, Logan Cook, who often has posted the videos on MemeWorld, his website, participated in a social media summit at the White House in July and took his children to meet the president in the Oval Office, accompanied by Dan Scavino, the White House social media director.

The connections underscore how the president’s escalating war on what he calls the “fake news” media has elevated people from the far-right fringe into allies who defend Trump with extreme language and images.
http://www.startribune.com/violent-video-was-product-of-right-wing-provocateurs-and-trump-allies/563102492/

[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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While we’re arguing about videos here, the guy who we currently call president, Donald J. Trump, has just one thing on his mind:

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/1183722535961202689

That’s right – he may have inadvertently started World War III, but at least he has time to take time out of his busy schedule to watch TV and tweet about it! Really, Dancing With The Stars is what he cares about today? Well, he’s dancing with the czars! Ah, see what I did there? Yes, of course I’m stalling because we’re about to talk about something extremely horrifying! Yes, we got to talk about Trump’s escalating conflict between Turkey and Syria, and remember how I keep pointing out that the Trump administration takes the wrong answer to everything? Why it looks like he’s about to bring back ISIS, and they’re about to be bigger and stronger than ever!

President Donald Trump’s betrayal of the Kurds stung deeply. “They trusted us and we broke that trust. It’s a stain on the American conscience.” These, according to The New York Times, are the searing words of an Army officer who has worked alongside the Kurds in northern Syria.

Kurdish forces played a central role in aiding the United States in fighting the Islamic State. But in a phone call a week ago Sunday, Trump gave the green light to Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdoğan to invade northern Syria—and, in the process, to engage in what even one of Trump’s most loyal supporters, Senator Lindsey Graham, describes as the “ethnic cleansing” of the Kurds.

According to Jennifer Griffin and Melissa Leon of Fox News, Trump was supposed to tell Erdoğan to stay north of the border, but instead “went off script.” By Wednesday, the Turkish offensive began, with Erdoğan’s aim to push back the Syrian Kurds from the border region. The results have been swift and brutal: the displacement of more than 100,000 people, executions and war crimes, the escape of hundreds of Islamic State prisoners. (If Islamic State fighters escape, they’ll “be escaping to Europe,” Trump said last week—as if Europe’s problems don’t affect the United States.) For the Kurds, the consequences of America’s policy change will only get worse. “I don’t know how many people will die. A lot of people will die,” a senior military source told Fox News. Yesterday the Trump administration tried frantically to make Turkey stand down, but enormous damage has already been done.
https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2019/10/trump-betrayed-kurds-whos-next/600004/

Yes, why so serious? See, Trump isn’t like your normal president. He’s a guy without a plan or a clue, and he has zero fucks to give to anyone who doesn’t kiss his ass 100%. See, the Art Of The Deal is all about loyalty, and the more loyal you are to him, the better. Well, that’s where we get ridiculous excuses for what he’s doing to that region like what Liz Cheney said:

In spite of President Donald Trump’s effective endorsement of the incursion, House Republican Conference Chair Liz Cheney, R-Wyo., has blamed Turkey’s invasion of northern Syria on the Democrats pursuing an impeachment inquiry against the commander-in-chief.

In a White House statement announcing that Turkey “would soon be moving forward” with their operation after the withdrawal of American troops, Trump appeared to endorse Turkey’s “long-planned’ attack on Kurdish allies in the region. The president later claimed that he had not endorsed the invasion, and he has since announced sanctions against Turkey (though they do not seem to have stalled its assault).

Cheney, who has been outspoken against allowing Turkey to slaughter U.S. allies, told Fox News that she blames Democrats for the Turkish operation, which Trump essentially green lit after a call with Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan.

"I also want to say that the impeachment proceedings that are going on and what the Democrats are doing themselves to try to weaken this president is part of this — it was not an accident that the Turks chose this moment to roll across the border," Cheney said during a Monday interview on "Fox & Friends." "And I think the Democrats have got to pay very careful attention to the damage that they're doing with the impeachment proceedings."
https://www.salon.com/2019/10/15/president-trump-abandoned-the-kurds-but-liz-cheney-blames-turkeys-invasion-of-syria-on-impeachment/

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Remember there was a Top 10 one time that I did where the news got so disturbing that I had to abandon the entry and talk about puppies instead? Well we might be doing that depending on how dark this gets. But with these two buffoons Trump and Erdogan in charge, you know they are laughing at this. If you’re wondering how bad this can get, well, we’re just getting started!

President Donald Trump didn’t make a “mistake” in pulling troops out of northeastern Syria last week, as many have charged. It’s what he has long wanted to do. The mistake was not understanding—and, more to the point, not caring about—the consequences.

Trump’s fateful phone call with Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan on Oct. 6, giving him the green light to cross the Syrian border and crush the Kurds without U.S. resistance, did more than any single act has ever done to demolish the post-WWII global order and isolate America from the rest of the world. This, again, has been Trump’s goal since he entered the White House.

Until recently, one or more of his advisers—Jim Mattis, H.R.
McMaster, John Bolton, or Gen. Joseph Dunford—obstructed or dissuaded him from withdrawing. Now all of those advisers are gone, and their replacements lack either the clout or the gumption to push back.

Trump may believe that he’s doing the right thing, that abandoning the rest of the world’s problems will “make America great again.” He doesn’t realize that America’s might and wealth depend, in large measure, on the cooperation it receives from others—either offered or coerced—in pursuing its interests around the world.
https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2019/10/trump-kurds-world-order-betrayal.html

By the way, in case you’re wondering what actual Marines think of this move, let’s ask them! Yeah, actual Army officers are well, let’s say less than amused at what is happening with the Turkey – Syria – Kurdistan conflict that could escalate into World War III. We have some absolutely maniacal people in charge and they are stabbing even their own armies in the back! Who knows how horrifying this could possibly get?

A former top Marine officer who led special operations troops in the fight against ISIS is denouncing President Donald Trump's decision to pull American troops out of Syria amid a Turkish attack on the Kurds, saying it amounts to a betrayal of allies that will harm U.S. national security.

Andrew Milburn, a Marine colonel who retired in March as the deputy commander of U.S. special operations forces in the Middle East, told NBC News that the small number of U.S. troops in Syria "bought us a lot for a very low price."

"By withdrawing these guys, who knows where this will end," said Milburn, who is one of the few prominent battlefield veterans of the ISIS campaign to express on the record what many current and former soldiers have been saying privately.

"As a guy who has fought [alongside] the Kurds," he said, "on an emotional level this is gut-wrenching."
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/mideast/top-special-ops-marine-who-fought-kurds-blasts-trump-move-n1065901

[font size="8"]
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So there’s plenty of reasons to hate Donald Trump right now, so let’s add to the pile, shall we? Yeah we got to talk about his rallies in Minneapolis and NOLA, and we’re not done. There’s apparently more MAGA hate rallies planned in the next couple of weeks. Yeah Donald Trump is on his Deplorable America tour and he also has a stop planned in Houston! Better get your tickets guys and gals! Because you won’t want to miss Trump’s classic routines like this when he mocked Peter Strzok and read his texts like he was operating a phone sex line. You know what? Forget the story, let’s show the clip first then talk about the story because it’s spectacular.

Yeah I know that clip is from Fox News, sue me. But still… I don’t know whether to get a room or not, seriously, that’s hot!

Donald Trump appeared to perform an impression of former FBI agent Peter Strzok and attorney Lisa Page having sex while the president was in the middle of a speech during a rally in Minnesota on Thursday.

Mr Trump slammed his hand on the podium and shouted “I love you, Lisa,” and “I love you too, Peter” before moaning “Lisa, I love you, Lisa! Lisa! Oh, God, I love you Lisa!”

The president had previously called Mr Strzok a “sick loser” amid investigations by special counsel Robert Mueller into Russian meddling in US elections. Mr Mueller removed Mr Strzok from his team after discovering anti-Trump text messages between Mr Strzok and Ms Page, who had an affair.

The president has falsely claimed that the texts had been deleted and has frequently argued that the messages amount to “corruption” within an investigation that followed Hillary Clinton’s loss in the 2016 presidential election.
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/trump-sex-video-fbi-rally-peter-strzok-lisa-page-a9152806.html

Yeah seriously! Whew… I mean if that’s the kind of family friendly content you’d come to expect from him at this point, wait until you see what he has in store for Houston! By the way, what the Trump cult lacks in subtlety, they more than make up for in comedic timing, just look at this video that was circulating around Twitter last week:

https://twitter.com/JordanUhl/status/1182819516042170368

Yeah that happened! So here’s what actually happened outside while Trump was barfing his brain inside:

Rep. Ilhan Omar protested outside President Donald Trump’s Oct. 10 campaign rally in Minneapolis.

AP’S ASSESSMENT: False. Omar was visiting Morocco from Oct. 6-11 and was not in her home state of Minnesota.

THE FACTS: Omar was on a five-day trade trip to Morocco with Democratic Reps. Marcia Fudge, from Ohio, and Karen Bass, of California, when social media users began circulating photos and video suggesting that the congresswoman was involved in protests outside the Trump rally in Minneapolis.

The scene was chaotic outside the Target Center where anti-Trump protesters filled the streets well before the president’s arrival. Andy Mannix, a reporter with the Star Tribune, captured video of the scene, which included a woman wearing a headscarf and face covering. After he posted the video on social media people began sharing it, falsely stating it showed Omar at the protests.

Mannix said he hadn’t given any thought to the woman in the video at the time.
http://www.startribune.com/ap-factcheck-u-s-rep-ilhan-omar-did-not-protest-outside-trump-s-minneapolis-rally/563103062/

As if the Minneapolis rally weren’t enough, Trump went to NOLA to campaign against Louisiana governor Jon Bel Edwards. I mean come on, haven’t the people of NOLA suffered enough already? Last thing they need is the Smoothie King Center full of MAGAholes. I mean come on people, this is Donald Trump live and uncensored here! Well, he’s been uncensored before but now you can buy his stand up comedy specials for the low low price of $29.99 each!

First he claimed the political establishment was rigging the 2016 election against him. Then he accused special counsel Robert Mueller of overseeing an “attempted takeover of the government.” Now President Donald Trump is telling his supporters he’s the victim of a “coup” that House Democrats have disguised as a legitimate impeachment inquiry.

It’s the same warlike strategy Trump has employed throughout his presidency: complain relentlessly about partisan constraints on his power, furiously berate political opponents, and use the victim card to bond with Americans who feel similarly betrayed by the political system. And yet, it’s unlike anything voters have seen before.

Story Continued Below

The president made it known on Friday, in his second appearance on the campaign trail since Democrats launched their impeachment probe, that he is eager to stoke an already-toxic political environment by being the rawest, angriest and least censored version of himself.

Story Continued Below

“They’ve been trying to stop us for the past three years with a lot of crap,” he stated matter-of-factly about his Democratic opponents on Capitol Hill.
https://www.politico.com/news/2019/10/11/trump-impeachment-campaign-044829

Yeah we can expect a lot of thumbs up in his next HBO special! Although I really want to see the tentative boxing match between Trump and Bill Maher, you know that’s going to happen. But while we mock and mock the ridiculous shit that Trump says on a daily basis, we should be paying more attention to what’s happening behind the scenes, because, while, Trump’s rallies are insane, they surprisingly are effective. Hold your boos.

Louisiana Gov. John Bel Edwards, a Democrat, will face a Republican candidate in a runoff after he failed to get more than 50 percent of the vote in Saturday's "jungle primary" in his GOP-friendly state.

President Donald Trump rallied on Friday in the state to support the Republican candidates on the eve of the election, calling Edwards "a liberal Democrat who has sold you out." On Saturday the president tweeted his congratulations, predicting the state would soon have businessman Eddie Rispone as a new governor.

The jungle primary meant that instead of top candidates of each party facing off one-on-one, any number of candidates from any part could compete for a final against the top two.

On Friday Trump asked both Republican candidates, Rep. Ralph Abraham and businessman Eddie Rispone, to join him on stage to offer brief remarks. Rispone will face Edwards after narrowly edging out Abraham.

The president said that didn't matter, as long as they kept Edwards under the 50 percent threshold in order to force a runoff next month between the governor and whoever was the top-finishing Republican.
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/2020-election/incumbent-governor-democrat-faces-runoff-trump-territory-n1065461

[font size="8"]Rudy Giuliani
[br] [/font] [br]

Let’s lighten things up and talk about Rudy Giuliani shall we? Hoo boy did he step in some seriously deep shit! And, as par for this administration, he stepped in a perpetually huge, steaming pile of certified grade A bullshit. So while Trump is making a spectacularly failed attempt to get the impeachment scandal off him and onto Hunter Biden, because reasons, it turns out that Rudy Giuliani is indeed stepping into that pile of bullshit that Trump is accusing Hunter Biden of. So to recap, Giuliani’s associates got arrested and now he’s being questioned. This gets better and better!

Federal prosecutors unsealed charges on Thursday against two men who have aided President Trump’s efforts to gather damaging information in Ukraine about his political opponents, a criminal case that signaled growing legal exposure for the president’s allies as Mr. Trump tries to blunt an impeachment inquiry in Congress.

The indictment of the two men, Lev Parnas and Igor Fruman, sketched a complex scheme to violate campaign finance laws and did not accuse Mr. Trump of wrongdoing. But it revealed new details about the push to pressure Ukraine: a campaign encouraged by Mr. Trump, led by his private lawyer Rudolph W. Giuliani and assisted by obscure figures like Mr. Parnas and Mr. Fruman.

Mr. Trump continues to defend the effort, which is the focus of the impeachment inquiry that House Democrats opened last month. The new indictment, however, suggests the first criminal implications of the shadow foreign policy that Mr. Giuliani pushed on behalf of the president.

And it is another example of the extent to which the messy power dynamics of Ukraine — a former Soviet republic and close American ally with a recent history of political upheaval — now dominate discussions about Mr. Trump’s future. The impeachment inquiry began after a C.I.A. officer who has worked at the White House raised alarms about a July telephone call in which Mr. Trump seemed to suggest that American military aid was contingent on Ukraine’s help in unearthing information that could help Mr. Trump politically.
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/10/10/us/politics/lev-parnas-igor-fruman-arrested-giuliani.html

I’m pretty sure that’s a live look in on Trump when he got that news! While Trump is off barfing his brain in an attempt to flip districts, his attorneys are stepping in some steaming bullshit. You know things are fucked up when your attorneys have their own attorneys. Is this Attorney-ception? So just how far does this “dark money” case go? Just like your favorite quarterback, it could… GO… ALL… THE… WAY!!!

TOUCHDOWN!!!!!!! WOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Now you might be asking what’s Trump’s stock in all of this? Is he going down with the sinking ship known as the S.S. Trumptanic? Well while he’s attempting to dig up dirt on his political foes and it’s backfiring in his face big time. Well, just like George Bluth, Trump may have accidentally committed some light treason here, and he’s dragging everyone down with him.

President Donald Trump sought Friday to distance himself from attorney Rudy Giuliani, even casting doubts about whether the former New York mayor is still his lawyer.

Asked whether Giuliani remained his personal attorney, Trump said: “I don’t know.”

“I haven't spoken to Rudy,” Trump told reporters as he was leaving the White House for a political rally in Louisiana. “I spoke to him yesterday, briefly. He's a very good attorney and he has been my attorney, yeah sure.”

Giuliani told USA TODAY shortly afterward that he’s still Trump's lawyer. “He hasn't told me otherwise,” he said.

Giuliani has emerged as a central figure in the Ukraine scandal that has led to an impeachment inquiry against Trump over efforts to push Ukrainian officials to investigate former Vice President Joe Biden, the Democratic presidential frontrunner.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2019/10/11/rudy-giuliani-donald-trump-wont-say-if-ex-mayor-still-attorney/3945806002/

Extra point is good!!! Trump has indeed distanced himself from his crooked attorney. He might be a step away from hiring Bob Loblaw. But my favorite part of this has to be the fact that Giulani is playing an armchair detective here. You can be Adrian Monk or Shawn Spencer or the Hardy Boys, but no, Giuliani is more like Mr. Magoo in this case. Hell, he looks like Mr. Magoo anyway!

When I last saw Rudy Giuliani for lunch, at the Trump International Hotel in Washington four weeks ago, his most pressing concern was that he had been locked out of his Instagram account. Giuliani, the former mayor of New York City and current personal attorney to President Donald Trump, had a young woman named Audra, who told me she had won the “hottiesfortrump” Reddit channel’s “Miss Deplorable” contest three years in a row, there to assist him. As Giuliani and I spoke, roughly a dozen tourists asked him to pose for photos and congratulated him on the “work” he was doing for the country.

Today, Giuliani, and specifically his “work” on behalf of the president’s 2020 reelection campaign, is a key part of a whistle-blower complaint describing alleged efforts to solicit foreign interference in the upcoming election—perhaps the most damning scandal of the Trump presidency to date. The complaint alleges that White House officials sought to “lock down” all records of Trump’s call with Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky, during which Trump offered the help of Attorney General William Barr and Giuliani to investigate the dealings of former Vice President Joe Biden’s son Hunter in the country. It also alleges that State Department officials were “deeply concerned” about Giuliani’s subsequent conversations with Ukrainian leaders.

Even among the president’s closest allies, Giuliani is now the subject of scorn. When I reached him by phone this morning, following House Intelligence Committee Chairman Adam Schiff’s release of the full whistle-blower complaint at the center of the Ukraine scandal, he was, put simply, very angry.

“It is impossible that the whistle-blower is a hero and I’m not. And I will be the hero! These morons—when this is over, I will be the hero,” Giuliani told me.
https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2019/09/giuliani-ukraine-trump-biden/598879/

[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Free Money
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It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines! This is Top 10 Investigates!

Everyone could use a little extra money, right? No matter if you’re spending money on a new appliance, putting that toward a car or car repairs, or taking that much needed vacation, an extra added bonus could be your ticket out of this mess. Well, that’s precisely the kind of thing that the city of Stockton, California was experimenting with. Universal income is a concept that is fairly common throughout most of Western Europe. But is relatively uncharted territory here in the United States. And there’s many reasons why – excessive corporate and billionaire greed among them. But what could you do with that extra money? Let’s find out!

The first data from an experiment in San Joaquin County where needy people get $500 a month from the government show they spend most of it on things such as food, clothing and utility bills.

The 18-month, privately funded program started in February and involves 125 people in Stockton. It is one of the few experiments testing the concept of “universal basic income,” an old idea getting new attention from Democrats seeking the 2020 presidential nomination.

Stockton mayor Michael Tubbs has committed to publicly releasing data throughout the experiment to win over skeptics and, he hopes, convince state lawmakers to implement the program statewide.

“In this country we have an issue with associating people who are struggling economically and people of color with vices like drug use, alcohol use, gambling,” Tubbs said. “I thought it was important to illustrate folks aren’t using this money for things like that. They are using it for literal necessities.”

But critics say the experiment likely won’t provide useful information from a social science perspective given its limited size and duration.
https://sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com/2019/10/05/data-basic-income-stockton-experiment-spending/

Shocker – while most conservatives feel that the concept of universal income would bring crime, poverty and a huge spike in excessive drug and alcohol use, turns out that it had exactly the opposite effect! People used it to pay off credit cards and student loans, among other bills they don’t want. That talking point is officially bullshit. So was the experiment a success?

What would a needy person do if you gave him $500 a month, no strings attached?

Stockton, Calif., is finding out. The city is eight months into an 18-month experiment with basic income, the idea that the government should give citizens a regular infusion of unconditional free cash. And it just released the first batch of data about how recipients are spending the money.

It turns out, they’re mostly spending it on food, clothes, and utility bills.

The data is provisional — the basic income experiment still has 10 months to go — and the number of participants is small: 125 people (out of an estimated 311,000 Stockton residents) who live at or below the median income line (around $46,000), nearly half of whom are working full- or part-time.

But it offers a counter to critics of basic income, who often claim that people getting free money will blow it on frivolous things or addictive substances, and that they won’t bother to find work. The evidence does not support that belief.
https://www.msn.com/en-us/money/markets/a-california-city-is-giving-some-residents-dollar500-a-month-and-heres-how-they-spend-it/ar-AAIsvXB

So now what are the pros and cons of having such a program put into place? There’s plenty of arguments for, especially if you look at the increasingly escalating homeless crisis growing in nearly every major city in the United States. But with the checks rolling out, what can you expect in the future – poverty to continue or people to get out of poverty or pay the bills they need to pay?

Residents of Stockton, California have been through a lot: from widespread foreclosures to the city going bankrupt. But for a handful of residents, some help is here.

One hundred Stockton residents started getting monthly payment of $500 on Friday. They'll receive the extra money for 18 months as part of an experiment testing the impact of universal basic income, also known as UBI.

The goal of UBI is to reduce poverty and inequality by giving people a regular minimal income. It's gained support from billionaires such as Elon Musk, Richard Branson and Mark Zuckerberg.

The Stockton project is a collaboration between Stockton Mayor Michael Tubbs and the Economic Security Project, an organization that advocates for basic income. Its fund contributed $1 million to the Stockton project.

"Too many families and Americans are trying to piece together multiple jobs and incomes and aren't able to make ends meet," Dr. Stacia Martin-West, a researcher who will be studying the Stockton participants, told CNN Business.
https://www.cnn.com/2019/02/16/tech/stockton-universal-basic-income/index.html

Yes – even mega billionaires like Mark Zuckerberg and Elon Musk are on board with this. But there won’t be anyone making it rain anytime soon. Especially with credit card debt increasing and basic necessities like the price of cars and gasoline increasing. So could it work in the United States? While the Stockton experiment is just an experiment, there’s plenty of room for growth and expansion in the area of universal income.

Young, sincere and raised on the edge of poverty, Sukhi Samra has a mother who worked two minimum-wage jobs when she was a kid — days at a gas station and nights at a Subway. Her father is disabled. She knows what an extra $500 a month would have bought her family.

“I spent a lot of 5th and 6th grade just, like, in those tables at Subway so that I could keep my mom some company and spend some time with her,” Samra said. “Five hundred a month would have meant that my mom spent a couple more hours at home with us every night.”

At 23, Samra is now head of the Stockton Economic Empowerment Demonstration, a pilot program to test a universal basic income. For the next year and a half, 130 residents of this struggling Central Valley city will get $500 every month, with no strings — such as employment or sobriety requirements — attached, in a social experiment that is as much public relations as rigorous research.

Although its organizers have promised transparency, so far, much of the program has been a closely guarded secret. The identities of the recipients have remained confidential while organizers plan a media strategy. Multiple requests by The Times to conduct interviews were denied.
https://www.latimes.com/local/california/la-pol-ca-basic-income-stockton-reparations-20190415-story.html

That’s it this week for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Gather around my fair brothers and sisters of Arizona State! It’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate, for the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it’s time to remind you that the holiest among us are the most full of:

My fair congregation!! You know last week was one of my favorite events of the year. And that’s mainly because it really gives a platform to the craziest among us. And unfortunately the craziest among us also happen to be among the most GAWDLY. Which is a damn shame, because it’s only been within the last 10 years that the right has just teetered off into the unfathomable edge of darkness! And how did they get aligned with the unholy, ungodly Dark One, whose name shall not be spoken in my church! And when corruption at the top is so bad then this is what you get. The Dark One has people going out of their minds, and yet, he claims that he speaks for JAYSUS!

President Donald Trump has claimed liberals are attempting to "silence and punish" Christians, and pledged never to allow the federal government to harass communities of faith.

Speaking at the annual Value Voters Summit, which is hosted by right-wing anti-LGBT group the Family Research Council, Trump suggested on Saturday night that his views were "under assault."

"Frankly, these people are crazy," the president said of the "radical left."

"We're under assault, very simple, we're under assault," the president continued, speaking to his right-wing Christian audience. "We believe in the right to free speech, we believe in the right to life."

"They're trying to silence and punish the speech of Christians and religious believers of all faiths. They are trying to hound you from the workplace, expel you from the public square and weaken the American family and indoctrinate our children," he added.

Trump became the first sitting president to speak at the summit in 2017, when he delivered an address at the event run by a group that has previously been criticized for its anti-LGBT stance.
https://www.newsweek.com/trump-speaks-anti-lgbt-groups-event-liberals-are-trying-silence-punish-christians-1464930

Seriously, sir, you know we’re not trying to silence you right? We’re just laughing at you. In fact I think the good LAWRD JAYSUS would scoff at how dumb people at the Values Voters Summit are! In fact if you want to see just how crazy the religious right can be, look no further than when they gather in large groups, because as we all know, people in large groups like that tend to say some ridiculously dumb stuff.

Texas House Representative Louie Gohmert stepped up Republican rhetoric against trans people this week, warning that the country would be in danger if LGBTQ+ people are provided the same job protections as other groups.

Gohmert was speaking at the Values Voter Summit, an annual conservative gathering for anti-LGBTQ+ activists, hosted by the Southern Poverty Law Center-designated hate group Family Research Council. A longtime opponent of LGBTQ+ equality, the Congressman brought up R.G. & G.R. Harris Funeral Homes Inc. v. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission, one of three employment discrimination cases currently pending before the U.S. Supreme Court.

If the court rules that employers cannot fire people on the basis of gender identity, Gohmert claimed the country would face “such obscurity for right and wrong that it will chaos [sic].” He also predicted chaos would come from “these great dictators,” presumably referring to trans people who simply want equal rights.

Gohmert went onto attack Supreme Court plaintiff Aimee Stephens, who was dismissed from her job after she began transitioning. He misgendered Stephens, while saying that people who transition are simply in violation of their employers’ policies.
https://www.out.com/politics/2019/10/14/texas-congressman-says-trans-equality-leads-dictatorship

Yes, Mr. Gohmert – even JAYSUS thinks you’re doing it wrong! I mean that’s not how this works, that’s not how any of this works! We support our trans brothers and sisters at the Holy Church Of The Top 10 – as we have said before everyone is welcome! By the way, in case you’re wondering the kind of Christian holy warrior the VVS attracts, look no further than this!

An Arizona artist who successfully sued the city of Phoenix over an ordinance that would have forced her company to provide services for same-sex weddings despite their religious objections has encouraged American Christians “to take a stand” for their beliefs.

The Arizona Supreme Court ruled last month in Brush & Nib v. City of Phoenix that Joanna Duka and Breanna Koski, owners of Brush & Nib Studio, cannot be compelled by a local antidiscrimination ordinance to provide their artistic services to same-sex weddings.

Duka was part of a panel at the Values Voters Summit on Friday comprised of people who were part of religious liberty litigation. When asked how she handled the pressure of the highly publicized lawsuit, Duka said her faith was a great help.

“Breanna and I put a lot of prayer into it. Is this something that God wants us to do? Are we on the right path? Because we wanted to do the right thing and we believed that God was leading us to do it,” explained Duka.
https://www.christianpost.com/news/artist-who-defeated-ordinance-forcing-her-work-gay-weddings-urges-christians-take-a-stand.html

Yes, that is not how this works! I mean whatever happened to the Golden Rule? It’s in our Good Book, but is it in theirs? That’s what the good LAWRD JAYSUS would have wanted, isn’t that right? But the big head of the event came when… yes, good sir, thank you. PHRASING!!! When the unholy, ungodly Dark One made an appearance himself! He’s not a godly man which makes him a hypocrite of the highest order, and JAYSUS would hate him. Which is why his name is not to be spoken in my church!

President Donald Trump on Saturday delivered a full-throated defense of his presidency at the Values Voter Summit, calling Democrats “crazy” over their impeachment inquiry, touting his recent withdrawal of troops from Syria and pledging to fight for religious liberty in America and around the world.

"These are bad bad people," Trump said of House Democrats, telling some 3,000 attendees at the Omni Shoreham Hotel in Washington, D.C., that “we’re going after” House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and House intel chair Adam Schiff, while raising the prospect of suing them, in a 79-minute address that hewed closely to his stump speech.

Pelosi “hates our country,” the president continued, before further lashing out against the House impeachment inquiry that followed revelations from a whistleblower alleging Trump sought the help of a foreign government to dig up dirt on a political rival.

"Look we've all seen it, we all seen what's going on. There was no compromise," Trump said of the phone call with Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky. "Frankly, these people are crazy. They're crazy. I shouldn't say it because we're all the same but they are crazy."
https://www.politico.com/news/2019/10/12/trump-values-voter-summit-2020-045162

Yes, Dark One, I cast thee out! Yes, I know the LAWRD says that we should welcome all, but we do not welcome a man who puts children in cages and decimates our allies! That’s what separates my church from the Values Voters! Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]Beating A Dead Horse: Support For Hong Kong
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In what may be the most insane and direct case of life imitating art, one of my favorite shows, South Park, called out China on its’ censorship and got banned for it. So the question on the table here is, how far is too far when life imitates art? And what the hell is China doing? Both of those are perfectly good questions. Unless you’re living under a rock, you know that the people of Hong Kong are rising up and protesting non stop against the brutal Jianping regime. And that’s having people’s opinions on a particularly touchy subject like this. In fact the subject of whether or not you should be allowed to support China has been such a tricky subject that the Jianping regime has gone into some serious damage control on the subject.

As political tensions between Hong Kong protesters and the Chinese government grow, the animated comedy South Park once again finds itself at the heart of the conflict.

In the wake of reports that China has outright banned all South Park content from the Internet, protesters have found other ways of disseminating the episode "Band in China." As spotted by The Hollywood Reporter, protesters in Hong Kong's Sham Shui Po district screened the episode to an impromptu but very appreciative crowd.

While it's unknown who exactly organized the screening, THR writes, "the screening inspired considerable discussion on the online forums favored by the protest movement though. Many praised South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone as 'prophets,' and rare Western media figures willing to show 'strong backbone' in response to the Chinese government's efforts to stifle international free speech."

Word that China has completely banned South Park content first surfaced last week following the original airing of "Band in China." The episode repeatedly criticizes the Chinese government's crackdown on free speech, including referencing a current Internet meme comparing Chinese President Xi Jinping to Winnie the Pooh and showing Mickey Mouse censoring his fellow Disney and Marvel characters at China's behest. The series continued to reference the China controversy in its most recent episode, "Shots!!!"
https://nordic.ign.com/south-park-14213562/30083/news/south-park-band-in-china-episode-screened-in-hong-kong-streets-after-china-banned-series

By the way here’s what is awesome about Matt Stone and Trey Parker – the twisted minds behind South Park – is that they troll. And they troll pretty damn good. In fact if you want to see how you should apologize to a brutal dictator who has a fragile ego like Xi Jianping, just look no further than how they actually apologized.

The creators of "South Park" have issued an "apology" to China after the show's most recent episode mocked the country's censorship and Hollywood's reliance on its theatrical market for movies.

The official "South Park" Twitter account on Monday tweeted the comedic statement below:

OFFICIAL APOLOGY TO CHINA FROM TREY PARKER AND MATT STONE.

"Like the NBA, we welcome the Chinese censors into our homes and into our hearts. We too love money more than freedom and democracy. Xi doesn't look just like Winnie the Pooh at all. Tune into our 300th episode this Wednesday at 10! Long live the Great Communist Party of China! May this autumn's sorghum harvest be bountiful! We good now China?"

The statement came after The Hollywood Reporter on Monday reported "South Park" has been banned from the Chinese internet and that videos, mentions, and discussion forums for the Comedy Central animated series had been removed or shut down.
https://www.businessinsider.com/south-park-creators-issue-mock-apology-to-china-after-ban-2019-10

Now here’s the thing. You don’t fuck with a dictator with a fragile ego like Xi Jianping. In fact we probably got the Top 10 banned from China as we were putting this edition together! And you know what? I don’t give a shit! And you want to know how fragile an ego Jianping has? Just look at what he did to DJ Zedd for simply liking a tweet about last week’s episode!

Zedd, a high-profile DJ and music producer, has been permanently banned from China for liking a tweet from “South Park’s” official account.

On Friday, Zedd tweeted about the ban, and CNBC verified the claim with his publicist on Saturday.

“This is true, yes, but we don’t have anymore info to give you at this time,” Adam Guest, senior entertainment publicist at U.K.-based SATELLITE414 agency, told CNBC. It’s unclear at the moment whether this means that Zedd has a travel ban to China. As of Saturday, his music was still available on Chinese music streaming site QQ Music.

“South Park” stirred up controversy in the world’s second-largest economy with an episode called “Band in China” which pokes fun at the country’s strict censorship regime and ridicules American firms doing business there.

Beijing responded by heavily censoring content related to “South Park” on search engines like Baidu and other online services.

The tweet that Zedd liked on Twitter was one celebrating “South Park’s” 300th episode.
https://www.cnbc.com/2019/10/12/dj-zedd-banned-in-china-for-liking-a-south-park-tweet.html

Holy shit! If you’re a celebrity, you can now get banned from China for simply liking a tweet relating to the most recent South Park episode! Which is why we also liked that tweet! In fact we followed the official South Park feed! Now if you’re Xi Jianping, how do you react to South Park? Well, you delete the whole fucking show from your country. It’s not enough to ban South Park, he wants every single mention of South Park ever banned.

South Park creators Matt Stone and Trey Parker hit back at China after the government scrubbed the show from the Chinese internet.
The episode, "Band in China" is a critique of how Hollywood shapes its content to avoid offending Chinese government censors.
"South Park" has never been afraid to be offensive, which is why the show now virtually no longer exists in China. Every clip, any online discussion from Chinese streaming services, social media and even fan pages have been deleted by the government, according to the Hollywood Reporter.
Stone and Parker issued an apology on Monday after China's crackdown -- well, kind of.
https://www.cnn.com/2019/10/07/us/south-park-apology-chinese-internet-trnd/index.html

And by the way, South Park wasn’t the only one who got this kind of insane treatment and censorship from the Jianping regime. Look at what they did to the Houston Rockets. It’s not enough to just ban that person, they’re banning the whole team and the league. The Jianping regime is doing some serious damage control right now and we may all get fucked!

Basketball fans attend a match between the NBA’s Brooklyn Nets and Los Angeles Lakers at Shenzhen, in the southern Chinese province of Guangdong on Saturday. Photo: APBasketball fans attend a match between the NBA’s Brooklyn Nets and Los Angeles Lakers at Shenzhen, in the southern Chinese province of Guangdong on Saturday. Photo: AP
Basketball fans attend a match between the NBA’s Brooklyn Nets and Los Angeles Lakers at Shenzhen, in the southern Chinese province of Guangdong on Saturday. Photo: AP

Live broadcasts of the National Basketball Association’s preseason games have resumed in China – except for matches with the Houston Rockets – as Beijing cools its rhetoric on a controversial tweet by the team’s general manager in support of anti-government protesters in Hong Kong.

Tencent, the NBA’s exclusive digital partner in China, streamed two games live with commentators – Chicago Bulls vs Toronto Raptors and Maccabi Haifa vs Minnesota Timberwolves – on Monday morning after skipping live broadcasts of two exhibition games in China last week.

Games featuring the Houston Rockets, who are next on court on Wednesday, have been taken off the schedule. Tencent last week offered subscribers who chose the Houston Rockets as their preferred games to change to another team or be refunded.

Monday’s live broadcast came days after Tencent’s announcement that it would not broadcast two of the exhibition games in China, which took place last Thursday and Saturday, after league commissioner Adam Silver said the NBA supported Houston Rockets general manager Daryl Morey’s right to exercise free speech.
https://www.scmp.com/news/china/society/article/3032849/nba-games-return-china-screens-houston-rockets-not-included

[font size="8"]How Is This Still A Thing: Tomahawk Chop
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It’s time once again to ask:

This week – the Tomahawk Chop. How is this still a thing? One of the oldest and most annoying chants in sports belongs to teams with Indian or Native American names. We’d ask how that’s still a thing but we will save that for another edition. But after the Atlanta Braves failed to advance in the playoffs yet again, attention is being turned to their signature chant – the Tomahawk Chop. But it’s not capturing the spotlight the way you would imagine. See in an era where people love to “trigger the snowflakes”, the Tomahawk Chop is attracting a particular kind of asshole to its’ fanbase. And well, because the Braves are trying to distance themselves from the chant because it might be, well, a little racist, there’s some that aren’t having any of it.

After receiving criticism from St. Louis Cardinals reliever and Cherokee Nation member Ryan Helsley over their promotion of the so-called “tomahawk chop” chant, the Atlanta Braves did not distribute foam tomahawks on seats before Game 5 of the National League Division Series as they typically do for playoff games.

The Braves issued a statement Wednesday addressing the changes:

“Out of respect for the concerns expressed by Mr. Helsley, we will take several efforts to reduce the Tomahawk Chop during our in-ballpark presentation today. Among other things, these steps include not distributing foam tomahawks to each seat and not playing the accompanying music or using Chop-related graphics when Mr. Helsley is in the game. As stated earlier, we will continue to evaluate how we activate elements of our brand, as well as the overall in-game experience. We look forward to a continued dialogue with those in the Native American community after the postseason concludes.”

Helsley told the St. Louis Post-Dispatch earlier in the series that he felt the chant was disrespectful of his Cherokee heritage.

The Braves and their fans adopted the chant in the 1990s, importing it from Florida State when former Seminoles football player Deion Sanders played for Atlanta. It has continued to be part of the Braves’ in-game presentation ever since.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/mlb/2019/10/09/atlanta-braves-tomahawk-chop-chris-helsley-nlds/3923352002/

Now remember when we said that abandoning the chant would attract a particular kind of asshole to actually do the chant? Well, conservatives took the “don’t do the chant” message and interpreted it as “do the chant and be a colossal asshole about it!”. So when the Atlanta Braves began their downfall in game 5, conservatives gleefully cheered it was because they abandoned the chant.

Georgia conservatives tore into the Atlanta Braves on Wednesday for making game-day changes revolving around the “tomahawk chop” chant after Ryan Helsley, a pitcher for the St. Louis Cardinals and a member of Cherokee Nation, called it “disappointing and disrespectful.”

The MLB team said in a statement that, "out of respect for the concerns," it would not distribute foam tomahawks to the seats before Game 5 its divisional round playoff series against the Cardinals, which St. Louis went on to win. The Braves also altered some accompanying music and chop-related graphics.

“As stated earlier, we will continue to evaluate how we activate elements of our brand, as well as the overall in-game experience,” the Braves said in a statement. “We look forward to a continued dialogue with those in the Native American community after the postseason concludes."

Team officials told The St. Louis Dispatch that it is considering how it will promote the tomahawk chop this offseason.
https://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/465254-conservatives-rail-against-braves-for-reducing-tomahawk-chop

Yes, be prepared to throw your pretzels because Georgia conservatives were actively cheering for their own team to lose because they couldn’t do the Tomahawk Chop. But that didn’t stop the fans from doing it anyways. Because it takes a special breed of asshole to be a conservative Trump supporter who loves to “trigger the snowflakes”.

When the Atlanta Braves faithful arrived at their seats in SunTrust Park for Wednesday’s Game 5 of a National League Division Series, there was something missing, something subtle, and yet something substantial.

The type of foam tomahawks that awaited fans as giveaways for games 1 and 2 of the series were not distributed before the series finale, and that was just the beginning of changes the Braves made to their in-game entertainment Wednesday as a response to Cardinals rookie Ryan Helsley’s concerns.

After Game 1, Helsley, a member of Cherokee Nation and grandson of a full-blooded Cherokee, said he found Atlanta’s “tomahawk chop” cheer “disappointing” and “disrespectful.”

“We’re sensitive to it,” a Braves spokesperson said.

The Braves also reduced the times they used the scoreboard and sound system to encourage their fans to do the tomahawk chop cheer, and the team promised not to use it if Helsley was in the game.
https://www.stltoday.com/sports/baseball/professional/updated-comments-by-cards-rookie-helsley-prompt-tomahawk-chop-changes/article_1e66a95f-00b0-565e-bc09-2686685bd033.html

Now that’s the kind of insensitive joke we shouldn’t be making here. But the fact that the Braves are waking up to the atrocity that is the Tomahawk Chop is certainly telling. And what’s even more telling is that Native American elders have now recognized that the Tomahawk Chop is becoming a serious problem and will be for the foreseeable future. But once again republicans are the reason why we can’t have nice things.

The Atlanta Braves’ front office says it will hold talks with Native Americans during the offseason in deciding whether to keep or axe the 27-year-old tomahawk chop tradition.

The team hasn’t offered any clarity on which indigenous groups or individuals it intends to approach, but if it’s the two major tribes that once inhabited Georgia, the Braves could be in for some difficult conversations.

In statements to The Atlanta Journal-Constitution, Cherokee and Creek tribal chiefs backed up St. Louis Cardinals relief pitcher Ryan Helsley, a Cherokee Nation member who said earlier this month that he found the fans’ chanting and arm-motions insulting. Helsley said the chop depicts natives “in this kind of caveman-type people way who aren’t intellectual.”

“The Cherokee Nation is proud of tribal citizen and Cardinals pitcher Ryan Helsley,” Principal Chief Chuck Hoskin Jr. said in a written statement, “for speaking out against stereotypes and standing up for the dignity of Native Americans in this country.
https://www.ajc.com/news/chiefs-georgia-native-tribes-call-tomahawk-chop-inappropriate/7SHzrtpEHXuPdOP03xpz1N/

Yeah probably. So Native American elders realize the problem, but once again the GOP shows themselves for the classless assholes that they are. That said, did the Braves lose because of reducing the Tomahawk Chop? Well, Georgia Republicans sure seem to think so. This is why we can’t have nice things.

Georgia’s conservative political figures have blamed Wednesday night’s humiliating playoff defeat for the Atlanta Braves on the team’s decision to ban its Native American-mocking Tomahawk Chop from the game. The team didn’t distribute giant foam tomahawks at the Game 5 playoff against the St. Louis Cardinals, and discouraged fans from doing the chopping-motion and chant traditionally used to fire up the crowd. The team took the decision after Cardinals pitcher Ryan Helsley, who is a member of the Cherokee Nation, called the chop disrespectful. “Have to feel this is karma for the unjustified and rash decision to do away with foam tomahawks,” tweeted State Rep. Trey Kelley during the defeat. Nick Ayers, former aide to Vice President Mike Pence, wrote: “Maybe don’t ban the tomahawk chop next time?” Debbie Dooley, a Georgia Tea Party organizer, said the Braves had “jinxed itself” by doing away with the offensive symbol. Ahead of the game, Helsley said the chop misrepresented Native Americans and depicted his ancestors “in this kind of caveman-type people way.” The Cardinals won 13-1, clinching a place in the National League Championship Series.
https://www.thedailybeast.com/atlanta-braves-georgia-republicans-say-their-team-lost-because-of-ban-on-tomahawk-chop

There you have it, you actually have Georgia conservatives cheering against their own team because they can’t do a chant that is deemed offensive. We can’t have nice things. That’s enough to make you ask – the Tomahawk Chop:

[font size="8"]I Need A Drink
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Hey everyone I really need a drink!

Of course you know the idea behind this segment is that we take a break from talking about all the bad shit going on in the world, have some drinks and talk about anything in the news as long as it doesn’t relate to politics. Well for this edition of “I Need A Drink” we figured that we’d do something different and combine two entries into one! We’re going to tell you about a fun new way to drink and a fun new way to enjoy sports! So tell me bartender, what goes well with a story about whiskey capsules and smashing things? What? No, I’m not taking one in the form of a suppository thanks! I’ll just stick with my usual Jack Daniels mixed with Jack Daniels. I call it the Double Jack. Well, this week, the makers of venerable scotch brand Glenlivet introduced what could be an absolutely terrible way to drink whiskey, and possibly send you to the ER in the process.

After the Tide pods craze, now we have Scotch pods, or "glassless cocktails" for drinkers who can't be bothered to pour.

"No ice. No stirrer. No glass. We're redefining how whisky can be enjoyed ... #noglassrequired," The Glenlivet tweeted as part of its "Capsule Collection" roll-out, timed with London's Cocktail Week.

People have been enjoying Scotch whisky for hundreds of years, usually in a glass and often on the rocks, of course.

Now, The Glenlivet, one of the world's top producers, offers this twist:

"A first of its kind for a spirit brand, the edible capsules are 23ml in size, fully biodegradable and provide the perfect flavour-explosion experience," read the Scottish brand's promotional materials. "Enjoying them is simple, the capsules are popped in the mouth for an instant burst of flavour, and the capsule is simply swallowed."
https://www.cnn.com/2019/10/05/world/glenlivet-scotch-whisky-capsule-glassless-trnd/index.html

Seriously, Glenlivet! I mean the ice, the stirrer, and the glass is why I drink whiskey! It’s the beauty of man and machine! I mean if I wanted to eliminate those things, I’d be mainlining cans of Coors Light straight to my veins like Barney! And you just know that someone, somewhere will be putting one of these in their ass. I mean it’s inevitable. In fact the makers of Glenlivet have already been preparing for the worst.

It's unclear what the alcohol content is in the pods, or how many of them you would have to ingest before you would be over the legal limit to drive.

"The Glenlivet only promotes responsible drinking, and the capsules are designed to be enjoyed in moderation by adults in a regulated and licensed environment," the statement said. "The cocktail capsules are not for sale and there are no plans to make them available in the United States or any other market at this time."

The Glenlivet also posted an update on its social channels saying the seaweed capsules are not available anywhere but London.

According to the Facebook event page, the whisky company partnered with Notpla, a packaging start-up, “to create an original consumption experience.”

“The seaweed used grows at a speed of around 1m per day and if discarded, the capsules biodegrade in 4-6 weeks, faster than fruit peel, meaning no waste,” the company said..

Many who commented on social media talked about memories of the Tide Pod challenge where teens were ingesting the colorful detergent packs as dares.

"Does it do laundry too? Who thought this was a good idea?" Twitter user @JohnGeyerman wrote.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/food/2019/10/07/whisky-pods-stir-up-controversy-and-bring-up-tide-pod-memories/3902266002/

Great, that’s just what we need! One simple pod that gets you drunk and does your laundry for you, what proof is that? 300? Yeah, industrial strength! Now before we go to the other half of this entry, we need some music!

Let’s go smash some shit!!! So say you’ve ingested a few of these and you’re watching your favorite team lose again. Well, the Philadelphia Flyers have got just the perfect way to take your frustrations out on losing.

Picture this: The Flyers are going through a February slump. The orange and black just inexplicably lost a 5-1 home game to the New York Islanders.

You need to blow off some steam before sitting in traffic.

So you go into the Wells Fargo Center’s Disassembly Room and smash some dishes, take a sledgehammer to a TV and unleash your rage upon everything in sight.

Sixers Fan Claims He Was Ejected From Team’s Exhibition Vs. China’s Guangzhou For Supporting Hong Kong

That’s right. The Wells Fargo Center has unveiled the first-ever rage room in a major professionals sports arena.

The rage room allows fans and guests to let out some stress by breaking, smashing and crushing items inside of the brand new Disassembly Room. Some of the breakable items even include the opposing team’s logos.

In a tweet from the Flyers, ESPN’s Katie Nolan and Gritty — who gave Gritty a weapon? — show off the rage room.
https://philadelphia.cbslocal.com/2019/10/08/wells-fargo-center-unveils-rage-room-where-fans-can-break-stuff-and-unleash-their-anger/

Yes, if you’ve ever wanted to take your frustrations out on your office equipment, used cars, or the opposing sports team, for a small fee, and a ticket to the next Flyers home game, you too can go apeshit until your heart is content! So you might be thinking “hey somone’s gonna die” while this room continues to exist, but guess what? it’s a huge hit and a huge money maker for the Flyers. I mean come on, this is Philadelphia sports fans we’re talking about here! Add a few Glenlivet pods, and as Doc Brown once famously said “You’re gonna see some serious shit!”.

Plenty cheeky, sure, but the new Disassembly Room inside Wells Fargo Center for the Philadelphia Flyers was all the rage during the team’s home opener. As part of the fresh approach to creating a fan experience, visitors could swing sledgehammers or bats while cranking through the room smashing typical household products.

But just how did this “rage room” concept play out on opening night for the Flyers? To the tune of 35 gallons of freshly disassembled New Jersey Devils-logoed junk, the Flyers were pleased.

When the Flyers released word of the Disassembly Room prior to the home-opener on Oct. 9, the rage room created plenty of buzz. That buzz lasted well into the first night as participants in the event “took their best shots at every intermission and throughout the entirety of the game,” says a team spokesperson.

Fans destroyed 35 gallons of junk on night one, including an array of common household items, such as dinner plates, cups and glass vases. Each item had a New Jersey Devils logo on it, the opponent for Philadelphia that night. The Flyers say that placing the logo of the opposing team on the items in the room is a theme they will carry forward each game.
https://www.forbes.com/sites/timnewcomb/2019/10/11/the-philadelphia-flyers-rage-room-opening-night-destruction-included-35-gallons-of-nj-devils-items/#7c8b803f54b2

[font size="8"]Keeping Up With The Candidates Ep. 11
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Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to our annual 2020 voters’ guide Keeping Up With The Candidates! Just like actual 2020 voters’ guides out there, we have absolutely no rhyme or reason as to why we’re doing this guide but we are powering through until the 2020 election! Or at least until our Stupidest State contest, whichever comes first. Now last week we had hinted that we were going to hang out with the Buttigeig camp but instead we’re going to talk about something much different since last night was yet another democratic debate. Where does your favorite candidate stand on the issues? Well there’s plenty of that going around including the recent shocking news from the Bernie camp about his recent heart attack. But that was not part of the debate last night. So what was? Well there is one clear winner from last night and that was Bernie Sanders.

Bernie entered this debate on the ropes. After spending most of the campaign solidly in second place behind Joe Biden in national polls, he is now a distant third behind Biden and Elizabeth Warren. He’s also in third in Iowa (which he nearly won in 2016) and in New Hampshire (which he won in 2016 in a huge landslide). By the numbers, he seems to be underperforming his last run, despite having a vastly more professional campaign infrastructure and not facing a juggernaut like Hillary Clinton.

As if that weren’t enough, his biggest liability — being 78 years old, 79 by the time he’d be inaugurated — came into sharper relief when he was hospitalized following a heart attack and had emergency surgery. It feels gross to hold someone’s health issues against them and I’m extremely glad that Bernie appears in good health now. That said, being president is an uncommonly demanding job and it’s reasonable for voters to wonder if a 78-year-old is up to it.

Sanders’s performance Tuesday night provided an answer to that worry. He was more animated and on his game than much younger candidates like Tulsi Gabbard or Amy Klobuchar. He was more effective than Warren at defending the Medicare-for-all plan they both support (but which, he’s quick to note, he wrote), replying to concerns about its realism, “I’m tired of people defending a system which is dysfunctional, which is cruel. 87 million uninsured. 30,000 people dying every year. 500,000 people going bankrupt. For one reason: They came down with cancer.”
https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/2019/10/15/20916495/democratic-debate-october-2019-winners-losers

So yeah Bernie was the big winner in the debates last night, even though we need to face some serious facts – if Bernie wins he would be the oldest president in US history. And add his recent health scare and that’s not good. Now switching subjects, with the Ukraine scandal constantly in the news how does former vice president Joe Biden stand up?

As expected, the first focus of this debate was the impeachment inquiry led by House Democrats. At its center is the allegation that Trump pressured Ukraine's president Volodymyr Zelensky to investigate Biden and his son Hunter Biden.

When asked about his son's business interests in Ukraine during his vice presidency, Biden redirected the focus to Trump. The question came after Biden's declaration over the weekend that his family members won't have foreign business relationships if he is elected.

Foreign business deals: Hunter Biden says he won't serve on foreign boards if Joe Biden elected president

“Look, my son did nothing wrong. I did nothing wrong,” Biden said.

“My son’s statement speaks for itself,” Biden said, before pivoting back to Trump. “What we have to do now is focus on Donald Trump. I’m proud of the judgment he (Hunter) made.”

Hunter Biden said in an interview with ABC News earlier in the day that he made a "mistake" and exercised "poor judgement" regarding the political consequences of his seat on the board of a Ukrainian natural gas company during his father's time in office. He denied any misconduct.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/elections/2019/10/15/top-moments-tuesdays-democratic-debate/3991377002/

No no no one’s firing anybody just yet. But really this whole thing with Hunter Biden is just Trump using the classic “I’m rubber you’re glue” defense. I mean what is he? A kindergartener? So speaking of impeachment you know the last time we did that big impeachment special. And of course that was brought up during last night’s debate. So how did your favorite candidate flare?

The October Democratic presidential primary debate kicked off Tuesday with the question that has taken over Washington D.C. in recent weeks: Should President Trump be impeached?

All of the candidates in the Democratic race support an impeachment inquiry into Trump, which began after a whistleblower filed a complaint alleging that Trump had pressured the president of Ukraine to investigate former Vice President Joe Biden and his son, Hunter Biden. The moment marked a significant difference from past debates, which have typically begun on the topic of healthcare.

Massachusetts Sen. Elizabeth Warren answered first, after being asked why Congress, rather than voters, should decide whether Trump should be impeached.

“Because sometimes there are issues that are bigger than politics, and I think that’s the case with this impeachment inquiry,” Warren said.
https://time.com/5701673/democratic-candidate-impeach-trump/

Seriously though there’s no one getting fired yet. We hope that @realDonaldTrump gets fired before his term is up, but that’s currently very wishful thinking at this point. So to recap so far we have a clear winner last night and that’s Bernie Sanders. A clear… I don’t know if you can call him a loser because he still beats Trump in the polls and that’s Joe Biden. So what can you expect for the November debate? I mean holy shit I can’t believe that it’s November already! But we do got to talk about the Ellen controversy before we go this week.

With the United States heading into one of the most important and divisive elections in its history, as the nation wrestles with challenges like climate change, health care costs and immigration, the final question at Tuesday's Democratic primary debate centered on comedian-turned-talk-show-host Ellen DeGeneres.

Though Americans generally find DeGeneres' goofy dancing and good-natured pranks adorable, many social media commentators – and at least one presidential candidate – were not amused that CNN's moderators chose to ask about a celebrity rather than the more weighty issues facing the country.

"No, you are not closing with an Ellen question," tweeted one viewer.

"This question about Ellen is so stupid," tweeted another.

DeGeneres was brought up at the political debate because she was recently spotted enjoying a Dallas Cowboys game while seated beside former President George W. Bush. The images of DeGeneres, who is a lesbian, yukking it up with Bush outraged some LGBTQ-rights activists who remembered his opposition to gay marriage. Others criticized DeGeneres for playing nice with a man they consider a war criminal for the 2003 invasion of Iraq.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/elections/2019/10/16/democratic-debate-question-ellen-degeneres/3995105002/

[font size="4"]Next Week:[/font]

Next week, one of the biggest hot button issues is guns, and nobody has a more thorough plan to beat mass shootings than Beto O'Rourke, so we are going to do a deep dive into Beto's controversial gun buy back program!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]Fitz & The Tantrums[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen, my next guest is an awesome band from LA, you can see them on tour next March. Their new album is called “All The Feels”. Playing their song “123456”, give it up for Fitz & The Tantrums!

Thank you Arizona State! This was fun! We’re off to Las Vegas and UNLV next! See you next week!

Credits

Host: Initech
Top 10 Conservative Idiots Recorded In Front Of Live Audience At: Wells Fargo Theater At ASU, Phoenix, AZ
Special Thanks To: University Of Arizona
Holy Shit Gospel Choir: ASU Honors Choir, Phoenix, AZ
Images: All images copyright belongs to respective copyright holders.
Videos: All videos copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Articles: All article content copyright belongs to respective copyright holders
Writing: Top 10 Writing Department
Graphics: Top 10 Graphics Department
Research: Top 10 Research Department
Lighting & Stage Props: Top 10 Lighting Department
Legal: Top 10 Legal Department
Advertising: Top 10 Advertising Department
HR: Top 10 Human Resources Department
Initech’s Wardrobe Provided By: JAB Inc.
Wheel Of Corruption By: Studio 1 Stage Props, Burbank, CA
Fitz & The Tantrums Appear Courtesy Of:
Management: Initech Productions, CCC Management
Follow The Top 10 On Twitter at: @10Idiots
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Questions? Comments? Complaints? Hate mail? E-mail The Top 10 at: Top10ConIdiots@gmail.com

Initech Productions: Yes, We Got The Memo

https://twitter.com/JordanUhl/status/1182819516042170368

October 2, 2019

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #7-14: Wheel Of Corruption: Sign O The Times Edition

Top 10 Conservative Idiots #7-14: Wheel Of Corruption: Sign O The Times Edition

Welcome back to the Top 10 Conservative Idiots! What’s up University Of Kansas? How are you guys doing? You doing fucking good? Great! Man, I thought last week was insane, holy shit. This week is like watching Avengers: Infinity War when Thanos shows up and everything starts going to shit, then Dr. Strange does that weird thing with his head and comes up with 1.4 million scenarios this could all play out and there’s only one that works. Whew, I mean I could talk about this all day but we got 10 items to get through and plan each one out accordingly. So do we have time for the thing? You know we’ve been doing this show for about 3 years now and we’ve been doing it live for over a year. We’ve had a few heckles, sure, but nothing like Chevy Chase experienced while doing a show in Atlanta. See he’s out promoting the 40th anniversary of his cult classic hit Caddyshack. So during the question and answer part of the show following the movie screening, an audience member yells out “YOU’RE BORING!!!”. And this is my favorite part – he attempts to fire back with an SNL insult from way back in the 70s, from a sketch that he wasn’t even in – “Jane, you ignorant slut!”. Oh yeah and he wasn’t even in that sketch, it was between Dan Akroyd and Jane Curtin. Thank you sir! Yes, I’m boring you all! You aren’t here to listen to me babble, you’re here for the idiots! That’s enough of the intro, we have a lot of idiocy to get to, but first John Oliver is back and he enlists the help of his celebrity friends to warn you about the dangers of unregulated compound pharmacies:

Holy shit! Nancy Pelosi dropped the big one and called for an impeachment inquiry against Trump and it is getting crazy! In the first slot this week is of course the guy who we currently call president, Donald J. Trump (1). And whew, it is going to take a lot to unpack the impeachment inquiry, but we can and we must power through it! In the second slot this week is also Donald Trump (2). So who are the whistleblowers who launched this complaint? We will get to know them and still keep them anonymously, because we have that coveted Wed at 2:00 PM slot! In the third slot this week, holy shit, is also Donald J. Trump (3)! And we have to unpack his absolutely bonkers speech at the UN General Assembly last week and dear god, I might need to take a breather after this one. Taking the 4th slot this week is Climate Change Deniers (4). So unless you’re living under a rock, you know about the journey of 16 year old Greta Thunberg, who hitchhiked across the ocean to speak to the UN about climate change, but why is she being compared to a Nazi? Yeah they suck. In the fifth slot this week is our weekly investigative piece, Top 10 Investigates (5), and last week one of England’s oldest travel companies and airlines, Thomas Cook unexpectedly shut down and left travelers stranded. So what happens next? We will find out! Taking the sixth slot this week is of course our weekly visit to the Holy Church Of The Top 10 in “Holy Shit (6) – and after the Dark One snubbed climate change activists to talk “religious freedom”, our resident pastor is going to do a deep dive on the subject. Taking the 7th slot this week is a new “Beating A Dead Horse” – can a movie be too dangerous? We’re going to explore the controversy surrounding the new Joker movie and who’s to blame for it – SJWs or incels? In the number 8 slot this week – is a new “This Fucking Guy”. This week after he got a subpoena from the House Intel Committee, we’re adding Trump’s crooked attorney and former New York mayor Rudy Giuliani to the list. In the number 9 (NEIN!!!!) slot this week we have a new “People Are Dumb”, because of course they are! And finally this week we’ve got another installment of our 2020 voters’ guide “Keeping Up With The Candidates” and this week we’re going to take a break from profiling and find out – where does your favorite candidate stand on impeachiment? The results might shock you! Plus we’ve got some live music from reggae legends Steel Pulse! Enjoy! And as always don’t forget the key!

[div style="padding: 20px; background-color: #ffffff; border-radius: 10px; box-shadow: 0px 2px 4px 1px #aaa;"][div style="font-family: arial, helvetica; font-weight: bold; border-bottom: 1px dotted #999; padding-bottom: 8px;"]

[font size="8"]Treason Season
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Hey everyone say it with me: It’s time for the WHEEL OF CORRUPTION! YAY!!!!!

Of course you know the rules by now – I spin the wheel and we have to talk about whatever it lands on. Of course if it lands on the guacamole option, you know that it costs $1.50 extra. So here’s what is on the wheel this week:

- Guns
- Abortion
- Crime
- Poverty
- Elections
- Buy A Vowel
- Sex
- Clip Without Context
- Death
- Greed
- Spying
- Walls
- Food
- Elections
- The Border
- Donald Trump
- Clip Without Context
- Chance
- 5,000
- Bankrupt
- Community Chest
- Top 10 Investigates
- A Random Tweet
- Something Random In The News
- ‘Merica!
- Golf
- 10,000
- Morally Bankrupt
- Guacamole
- Clip Without Context
- Talk Shows
- Holy Shit
- Beating A Dead Horse
- This Fucking Guy
- How Is This Still A Thing?
- Intermission
- 15,000
- People Are Dumb
- Keeping Up With The Candidates
- I Need A Drink
- Infowars
- Go Directly To Jail
- T-Shirt Cannon
- Lightning Round
- Bonus Spin

So you remember last time we debut our brand new, completely redesigned Wheel, to much acclaim from the press! And we stopped using bad sequel titles and have moved on to using Prince album titles as the names. So let’s get this going! Spin that shit! Come on, no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop! Clip without context!

Trump is his own whistleblower? How does that work? Like the scene from Fight Club where Edward Norton turns himself in and then he’s greeted by the cops who want to mutilate his genitals? Yeah kind of like that. Spin it again! Donald Trump. Or wait.

Yeah these are the people we’re up against. Of course if you know anything about anything that is going on right now, you know that Nancy Pelosi dropped the big one regarding impeachment, and Trump is losing it big time. See, MAGAs? We’re not hysterical lunatics, we’re laughing at you. And you can’t get it through your stubborn heads that you might be wrong. I mean we’ve covered a lot of stupid shit on this program from Trump and Trump fans, but asking a foreign power to investigate dirt on your opponent’s sons’ business dealings, that is crossing a line. Especially after you were previously investigated!!! How much lower can they get? Well a whole hell of a lot lower!

If the Trump administration has riveted the world -- a family saga of unexpected power, spiked with geopolitical tension and market upheaval -- the latest twist has international observers wary and agog as Democrats pursue an impeachment inquiry into the President.
After almost three years of turbulence that include presidential tweets insulting foreign leaders, abrupt withdrawals from international pacts and policy reversals as US officials say one thing and Trump emphatically says another, observers are almost inured to the chaos.
But current and former diplomats tell CNN that this chapter stands out, as much for what's at stake within the US as the potential fallout around the world.
"It's always something with this administration," said one European diplomat, "but this feels different."

Wag the dog?
CNN spoke to current and former envoys based in the United States as well as diplomats gathered from around the world for the 74th United Nations General Assembly to hear their countries' views and concerns as the impeachment drama unfolds.
Some said the turmoil could mean that US global leadership -- seen as waning under Trump -- will fade ever further. Others argue the President may try to draw attention from his domestic troubles by making a splash on the global stage, though few see a "wag the dog" scenario of war.
Some worried about the ripple effects -- that their leaders' call transcripts with Trump could also be released or that global markets could eventually be destabilized. Several said they see the impeachment battle ultimately strengthening Trump, while others marveled at just how far political discourse in the US has fallen, and how fast.
https://www.cnn.com/2019/09/28/politics/trump-impeachment-saga-diplomats-world/index.html

Yeah how about that? I mean we’ve been covering this shit show since the beginning and I feel like we might actually start seeing this come to an end and we might get the adults back in charge. There is just one problem though – we might not yet witness the full raw power of the right wing media machine, which has done nothing but divide us.

Rush Limbaugh, the popular right-wing personality who is widely regarded as the king of conservative talk radio, was on a fiery rant.

"The whole thing is a sham," Limbaugh told his listeners on Friday, speaking about the whistleblower complaint that has ignited a political firestorm which could ultimately imperil the presidency of Donald Trump.

"Bottom line, there isn't anything really new here," Limbaugh said. "This is just the next phrase of 'Get Trump.' This is the next phase of the operation to overturn the election results of 2016."
Limbaugh's comments, while extraordinarily misleading, were largely representative of how the right-wing media machine has reacted to the deepening scandal Trump finds himself in over his dealings with Ukraine.

A complaint filed by a whistleblower in the intelligence community, made public this week, alleged the White House engaged in a cover-up after Trump pushed the president of Ukraine to investigate former Vice President Joe Biden, the leading Democratic presidential contender. A rough transcript of a July phone call released by the White House this week confirmed Trump had, indeed, asked the Ukrainian president to "look into" Biden.

Now, as Trump faces an impeachment inquiry in the Democratic-led House of Representatives, right-wing media, which grew out of talk radio in the 1990s into a cultural behemoth in the 2000s, will be crucial to his survival.
https://www.cnn.com/2019/09/29/media/trump-impeachment-right-wing-media/index.html

Go blow it out your ass Rush, Trump is going down and you’ve got a first class ticket on the Republican Titanic! And in case you can’t tell or you don’t follow @realDonaldTrump, boy is he mad! He is frothing at the mouth psychotic mad. And he’s escalating the rhetoric very quickly! Really, someone needs to take Twitter away from him, he’s going to cause some serious damage and fast.

President Donald Trump on Monday attacked the whistleblower at the center of the growing Ukraine scandal and House Intelligence Chairman Adam Schiff, after promoting comments from a supportive pastor who told Fox News that impeaching the president would lead to a "Civil War-like fracture in this nation."

Trump's comments on Twitter came as he faces an impeachment inquiry in the House over a phone call with Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskiy in which he asking Zelenskiy to investigate former Vice President Joe Biden's family. The Trump administration, around the same time as that July conversation, placed a hold on hundreds of millions of dollars in Ukrainian military aid, only to release it earlier this month.

Trump called the whistleblower complaint at the center of the scandal "fake" on Monday and said it was "not holding up," even though it lined up with a record of the July 25 call between the two presidents that the White House released, was deemed credible by a Trump-appointed intelligence community inspector general, and was authored by a whistleblower who Trump-appointed acting Director of National Intelligence Joseph Maguire told Congress last week had acted in "good faith."

Then Trump went after Schiff, who he said "illegally made up a FAKE & terrible statement, pretended it to be mine as the most important part of my call to the Ukrainian President, and read it aloud to Congress and the American people.."

"It bore NO relationship to what I said on the call," Trump added. "Arrest for Treason?"
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/donald-trump/trump-attacks-whistleblower-schiff-tweets-impeachment-would-cause-civil-war-n1060191

Really, is anyone taking him seriously at this point? I mean the guy who is leading the investigation into your corruption is the bad guy? Seriously WTF is wrong with this guy? And now he’s calling for a second civil war? He’s losing it big time folks. I mean just the tweets over the weekend themselves are enough to get him impeached. But ah, probably nothing will happen, which is par for the course at this point.

President Donald Trump's recent tweet quoting a longtime evangelical pastor who warned of a "Civil War" if Democrats seriously pursue removing him from office could actually be grounds for impeachment, one Harvard Law professor said.

"If the Democrats are successful in removing the President from office (which they will never be), it will cause a Civil War like fracture in this Nation from which our Country will never heal," Trump tweeted on Sunday night.

The tweet was a quote from Robert Jeffress, a Southern Baptist pastor who gave the comment during an appearance on Fox & Friends Weekend. Trump added his own parenthetical aside to Jeffress' quote, in which the president asserted that Congress won't be successful in their impeachment efforts.

The president's tweet was immediately met with backlash, and Harvard Law professor John Coates argued that the social media post itself is an "independent basis" for lawmakers to remove him from the White House.

"This tweet is itself an independent basis for impeachment - a sitting president threatening civil war if Congress exercises its constitutionally authorized power," Coates wrote on Twitter on Monday.
https://www.newsweek.com/trump-civil-war-tweet-grounds-impeachment-1462044

[font size="8"]Meet The Whistleblowers
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Let’s give the wheel a good strong spin shall we? And it lands on… wait for it… a random tweet!

https://twitter.com/RandyRRQuaid/status/1178649797710024704

Yes, that’s Cousin Eddie threatening civil war. You know what they say about politics making for strange bedfellows, right? Spin it again! Donald Trump! Yeah so the whistleblower is all over the news and Trump is losing it big time. So here’s where we’re at – the whistleblower has already sought federal witness protection because – wait for it – Trump supporters put a $50K bounty on his head. Yes, an actual hit man movie style bounty on his head. And just when you think the MAGAs can’t sink any lower, it gets worse. Don’t boo just yet!

The intelligence whistleblower whose complaint has rocked the White House is concerned for his safety amid a flurry of attacks by President Trump and a $50,000 price on his head, but is not asking for federal protection, his lawyer said.

Andrew Bakaj, a lawyer for the so-far unidentified whistleblower, wrote a letter to acting Director of National Intelligence Joseph Maguire warning that the whistleblower could be put in "harm’s way” should his identity be disclosed.

The lawyer quoted Trump’s reported statements that the whistleblower is a “spy” who should be harshly punishedand demanding to know his identity in defiance of federal law that bars any retaliation against those who file whistleblower complaints.

The letter also cites reports circulating on right-wing social media sites that Trump supporters have offered a $50,000 reward for the identity of the whistleblower.

“We expect this situation to worsen for our client and any other whistleblowers as the investigation continues,” wrote Bakaj, of the Compass Rose Legal Group. The firm did not immediately return calls for comment.

After the letter surfaced, CBS News reported on “60 Minutes” that the whistleblower had been placed under federal protection. The lawyer for the whistleblower denied that report, although "60 Minutes” said it stands by its reporting.
https://www.nydailynews.com/news/politics/ny-whistleblower-trump-federal-protection-20190930-dul5by6l3raqna7hns56xuenp4-story.html

Yeah BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Now really Trump, or Tmurp as we’re now calling him, really brings out the worst in people doesn’t he? So what, are we going to play a game of the Masked Whistleblower? Who is the masked whistleblower??? Well, whoever it is, Trump wants to meet this person face to face – as is his constitutional right. But… as we’ve seen in that previous clip that we played, even they don’t know who the hell it is.

President Donald Trump escalated his attacks against the anonymous whistleblower at the center of the Ukraine call controversy that could soon see the U.S. leader impeached. The president's comments came on Sunday, just a day after the whistleblower's lawyer warned that the president's earlier remarks were already putting their client's "personal safety" at risk.

In a letter addressed to Joseph Maguire, the acting director of National Intelligence, the anonymous whistleblower's lawyer, Andrew Bakaj, warned on Saturday that Trump's public outrage over the whistleblower's report had already created "serious concerns for our client's personal safety."

"The events of the past week have heightened our concerns that our client's identity will be disclosed publicly and that, as a result, our client will be put in harm's way," Bakaj said of the whistleblower, who flagged concerns around Trump pressuring Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky to investigate 2020 presidential candidate Joe Biden and his son in a July phone call.

Of particular alarm, the lawyer said, were Trump's comments on Thursday, demanding to know "who's the person that gave the Whistleblower the information, because that's close to a spy."

"You know what we used to do in the old days when we were smart? Right? With spies and treason, right?" Trump said at the time. "We used to handle them a little differently than we do now."
https://www.newsweek.com/donald-trump-ukraine-whistleblower-demands-meet-attorneys-warn-personal-safety-concerns-1462003

Yeah that happened! I mean can we blame the whistleblower for not wanting to meet the guy who’s been openly threatening him and causing a bounty on his head? I mean really when you have a Commander In Chief who is an absolute loose cannon, and is stirring up his supporters to do something really bad, can you imagine what is going to happen when the whistleblower makes their appearance before Congress?

The lead attorney for the whistleblower that set off an impeachment inquiry into President Donald Trump expressed "serious concerns" for his client's safety to the acting Director of National Intelligence over the weekend.

Andrew P. Bakaj, the attorney, in a letter to acting DNI Joseph Maguire, said that he has appreciated the National Intelligence office's "support thus far to activate appropriate resources to ensure their safety," but also wanted to alert him of concerns over the whistleblower's safety.

"The purpose of this letter is to formally notify you of serious concerns we have regarding our client’s personal safety," Bakaj wrote. "The events of the past week have heightened our concerns that our client’s identity will be disclosed publicly and that, as a result, our client will be put in harm’s way."

Bakaj cited comments Trump made last week during a private event in New York, where he said: "I want to know who’s the person that gave the Whistleblower, who’s the person that gave the Whistleblower the information, because that’s close to a spy."

"You know what we used to do in the old days when we were smart? Right? With spies and treason, right? We used to handle them a little differently than we do now," Trump continued.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2019/09/30/whistleblower-attorney-expresses-concern-for-client-safety-impeachment/3817246002/

Yes, Trump, you’re a very bad person. And not in a comical Billie Eilish kind of way. Not even in a Mr. Burns kind of way, you’re pure fucking evil. And by the way, Russian trolls – don’t bother trying to out the whistleblower. Instead, you know who are better trash talkers? That’s right – these guys are the true masters of flinging shit. After all, AM radio talk show hosts get paid to fling shit.

From Donald Trump on down, prominent Republicans used part of their weekend to falsely accuse Trump’s hand-picked intelligence community inspector general (IC IG) of secretly changing the requirements for intelligence workers to submit whistleblower tips as part of a “deep state” plot to clear the way for the Aug. 12 complaint about Trump’s phone call to the president of Ukraine.

The smoking gun in the putative conspiracy is an obscure government form, IC IG ICWSP Form 401, also known as the Disclosure of Urgent Concern Form. The document is put out by the IC IG for intelligence workers who need to file urgent complaints that trigger special treatment under the Intelligence Community Whistleblower Protection Act.

According to the GOP and an army of conservative commentators, the old version of the form prohibited workers from submitting urgent complaints based on secondhand information; only misconduct witnessed personally could be reported. That changed in early August, the false claim goes, when ICIG Michael Atkinson snuck through a hasty revision to the complaint form that reversed longstanding policy.

“Whistleblowers were required to provide direct, first-hand knowledge of allegations,” reads a Saturday tweet by House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy. “But just days before the Ukraine whistleblower came forward, the IC secretly removed that requirement from the complaint form.”
https://www.thedailybeast.com/gop-shows-russian-trolls-how-its-done-with-trump-inspector-general-whistleblower-smear

[font size="8"]Donald Trump
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Let’s give the wheel a good strong spin shall we? And it lands on… wait for it… Donald Trump! But we just did Trump! Is the wheel broken? Oh it’s performing a system update. See, I’m still not used to the fancy controls of the new wheel. Please hold!

We’re back! Spin it again! Oh it lands on Trump again! Fine. Yes, we got to talk about how batshit fucking crazy his speech at the UN General Assembly was. Because, whew. There was quite a lot to unpack from that word salad. It was quite insane. But this might be my favorite part of the whole speech because if there’s anything Trump shouldn’t do, it’s compare himself to former presidents. And he definitely shouldn’t compare himself to Abe Lincoln. Oh no, he’s the exact opposite of Abe Lincoln. See, Honest Abe was the Great Uniter. President Shit For Brains, on the other hand is the great divider.

TRUMP: But you know you look at that — most presidential, I just said I’m the most presidential except for possibly Abe Lincoln when he wore the hat — that was tough to beat.

(Laughter)

Honest Abe, when he wore that hat, that was tough to beat. But I can’t do that, that hat wouldn’t work for me. Yeah, I have better hair than him. But Honest Abe was tough to beat. Remember we used to do that during the campaign. They used to say, when I speak, the crowd would be crazy, I’d go crazy — we would all go crazy. We had a lot of fun together. We had 25,000 — We’ve never had an empty seat. From the day I came down the escalator, with a potential — unbelievable woman who became a first lady.

(Applause)

The crowds loved her, the people love her.

But we’ve never had an empty seat, not one. I really believe that. There was one case where we had a tremendous snowstorm, and it was just about frozen. It was like a monster storm, I don’t even know how it got there. I said, “how’s the crowd?” “It’s just not full, sir.” I said what does that mean. There’s like two seats on top. Thousands and thousands of people couldn’t get there. So they show pictures of the empty seats. The worst storm they’ve had in years. They show pictures of like nine empty seats. They could have been people just went to the bathroom together.
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/09/26/us/politics/trump-treason-spies-whistle-blower.html

Was Honest Abe tough to beat? I couldn't gather from that mess of a speech whether or not he was tough to beat or not. And we’re going to get into the subject of religious freedom in a bit when Holy Shit starts. But really, when Trump speaks is anyone listening but the MAGA base? I would be curious to know the answer.

Today marks the first day of the high-level debate at the U.N. General Assembly in New York, with U.S. President Donald Trump set to deliver his third speech on the world’s biggest diplomatic stage. This year, the issues at the top of the U.N. agenda may differ from Trump’s. The president’s address follows Monday’s U.N. climate summit—where the most striking speech was delivered by teenage climate activist Greta Thunberg.

One topic that could capture attention in Trump’s speech? Iran. The U.S. president has already said that he will discuss regional tensions in the Persian Gulf in his address. On Monday, the leaders of Britain, France, and Germany backed the United States in blaming Iran for the recent attacks on Saudi oil facilities and endorsed the idea of talks with Iran over a new nuclear deal.

Chipping away at a legacy. The Trump administration has been quietly eroding one of former Vice President Joe Biden’s foreign-policy legacies, Colum Lynch reports. The 1999 Helms-Biden act resulted in the repayment of nearly $1 billion to the United Nations. But under Trump, the United States has stopped paying hundreds of millions in dues—potentially damaging Washington’s standing at the United Nations.

Another president’s speech. As is tradition, Brazil’s President Jair Bolsonaro will open the U.N. General Assembly debate today, speaking immediately before Trump. Bolsonaro—still recovering from abdominal surgery—will stay in New York only briefly. His speech is expected to irk other world leaders, particularly as he defends his controversial environmental policies, which many observers blame for contributing to fires and deforestation in the Amazon.
https://foreignpolicy.com/2019/09/24/trump-delivers-third-u-n-speech-united-nations-unga-iran-nuclear-deal-jair-bolsonaro-climate-summit-boris-johnson-britain-brexit-illegal-supreme-court-prorogue-israel-netanyahu-gantz-elections/

Yeah I’m about ready to do that too. But what’s crazier is that Trump is channeling his inner Alex Jones and speaking about the dangers of globalism. I will repeat that. He is speaking at the UN about the dangers of globalism! This would seriously be like speaking at the Peta convention about getting food poisoning from eating tofu! Just…. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!

Donald Trump has used his address to the UN general assembly to deliver a nationalist manifesto, denouncing “globalism” and illegal immigration and promoting patriotism as a cure for the world’s ills.

Trump’s third UN speech of his presidency was a largely philosophical tract delivered in a muted monotone, which bore the hallmarks of his most long-serving hardline White House adviser and speechwriter, Stephen Miller.

In his address, the US president echoed the rhetoric of far-right nativist groups who argue that citizens with long family history in a country have a more profound grasp of national interests than recent arrivals, and that the established population should be on its guard against forces aimed at its “replacement”.

“The free world must embrace its national foundations. It must not attempt to erase them, or replace them,” Trump said. “The true good of the nation, can only be pursued by those who love it, by citizens who are rooted in its history, who are nourished by its culture, committed to its values, attached to his people.”

In the course of his 36-minute speech, Trump repeatedly referred to “patriots”, an undefined group of citizens uniquely able to interpret national interest.
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2019/sep/24/donald-trump-un-address-denounces-globalism

I believe that’s the actual live feed from Alex Jones watching this speech in the Infowars studios. But this might be my favorite part of the UNGA last week. Apparently Wilbur Ross pulled his best Homer Simpson and fell asleep during Trump’s speech! Do I have to be the one to say it? OK – Wilbur Ross is officially the smartest person in the room there!

President Donald Trump used his Tuesday morning speech before the United Nations General Assembly to criticize global free trade, illegal immigration, social media, and others of his favorite rhetorical and political targets.

Part of the way through Trump's speech, Commerce Secretary Wilbur Ross, sitting in attendance with other Trump administration officials, appeared to fall asleep. Video of the General Assembly shows Ross with his head down and eyes closed during parts of the president's speech.

In a statement provided to USA TODAY afternoon, Ross responded, saying his was not a schedule of someone with "low energy."

"This is fake news," the Commerce secretary said in the statement. "I wear hearing aids and, during President Trump’s inspiring speech, which covered in detail the entire range of significant issues facing the world, was concentrating on what was being said."

Ross continued: "Immediately following the President’s remarks, I attended bilateral meetings with the leaders of the United Kingdom and India, and, later in the day, will have follow-up meetings with officials from the United Kingdom and South Korea. Additionally, throughout the entirety of the UN General Assembly, I attended events or am planning to participate in meetings with the governments of Pakistan, Poland, Egypt, Japan, Greece, and Vietnam."
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2019/09/24/donald-trump-un-speech-wilbur-ross-appears-fall-asleep/2427740001/

[font size="8"]Climate Change Deniers
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Let’s spin it to win it! And it lands on… DEATH! Well, Death Metal anyway!!! m/ m/

Hey two Swedish exports in one! How cool is that? Spin it again! The environment!

Well, Milhouse’s words are empty but the point is clear that people don’t care about the planetary environment they live in. How little do they care? I mean shit it’s been 15 fucking years since Al Gore won the best documentary for An Inconvenient Truth, and people still don’t give a fuck. Hell, the subject of this next entry – Greta Thunberg – was in fact just one year old at the time. Now at age 16 she’s an international celebrity for having the guts to call out our politicians for not giving a shit.

When Greta Thunberg began her speech to the United Nations, it was clear from the start that her address to world leaders would be different.

"My message is that we'll be watching you."

The line was met by applause and some laughs, but her expression signaled that this was no laughing matter to her.

If you listen to the scientists, as Thunberg urged Congress to do earlier this month, it's easy to understand why.

If the planet continues to warm, the evidence suggests the future awaiting her generation could be frightening..

The 16-year-old's fiery speech was a milestone of sorts for a movement that's been given new urgency by a group of savvy young leaders.

Around the world, young people are increasingly leading the push to address climate change. They are filing lawsuits, marching in the streets in massive numbers, and pressuring world leaders to act.
https://www.cnn.com/2019/09/28/world/climate-change-youth-activists-greta-thunberg-world-leaders-inaction/index.html

Unfortunately Homer, it doesn’t work that way. And you know what? Climate change is an issue that affects everyone. And it doesn’t take an environmental scientist to see what’s going on in the world around you. Deadly fires. Tornadoes in places where they weren’t before. Lighting during a heavy snow storm. Hurricanes the size of small cities. And if you keep denying it, it’s only going to get worse. But thankfully we have people looking to enact real change on this issue!

Six million people have taken to the streets over the past week, uniting across timezones, cultures and generations to demand urgent action on the escalating ecological emergency.

A fresh wave of climate strikes swept around the globe on Friday with an estimated 2 million people walking out of schools and workplaces.

Organisers say that during the week of protests – that began with a global climate strike last week – a total of 6 million people, from trade unionists to schoolchildren, have taken part in thousands of towns and cities.

“This week was a demonstration of the power of our movement,” said a spokesperson for the FridaysForFuture group which has helped coordinate the demonstrations. “People power is more powerful than the people in power. It was the biggest ever climate mobilisation, and it’s only the beginning. The momentum is on our side and we are not going anywhere.”
https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2019/sep/27/climate-crisis-6-million-people-join-latest-wave-of-worldwide-protests

Yeah and the sugar won’t be the only thing that’s melting, Homer! And by the way if you want to know where all this madness revolving around climate change is so important, and why Ms. Thunberg needed to speak before the UN, most of it can be traced back to one guy – the late, not great, king climate change denier himself – David Koch. Yeah, fuck that guy.

David Koch, who died Friday at the age of 79, is best known as a major funder of right-wing political causes, from tax cuts to deregulation, an enthusiastic patron of the arts and a man-about-town. But to his critics, his most lasting political legacy might very well be the rapidly warming world that he has left behind.

Koch Industries realized early on that it would be a financial disaster for the firm if the American government regulated carbon emissions or made companies pay a price for releasing carbon into the atmosphere. The effects of such a policy would be measured over decades for Koch. The company has billions of dollars sunk into the complex and expensive infrastructure of crude-oil processing. If a limit on greenhouse gas emissions were imposed, it could dampen demand for oil and diminish the value of those assets and their future sales. The total dollar losses would likely be measured in trillions over a period of 30 years or more.

In the face of this political problem, David Koch and his brother Charles built a political influence machine that is arguably unrivaled by any in corporate America.

Construction on the Koch political machine began in the 1970s, after Charles Koch took over the family company. He and David began funding and orchestrating a political project to restrain government power in the United States through lobbying, think tanks and political donations. The effort accelerated in the 1990s after a Senate committee, following a long investigation, accused Koch Industries of stealing oil from Native American reservations where the company was operating. That experience convinced David and Charles Koch that they needed to have a stronger presence in Washington to fend off their critics.
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/08/23/opinion/sunday/david-koch-climate-change.html

Yeah if we keep getting climate change deniers like Mr. Koch in charge, we’re gonna get more killstorms and they will be a whole lot worse than class 3! But you know what’s really scary about climate change deniers? Is that even the people who are in a position of power where they could actually do something about it, are fucking terrified! Well? What are you waiting for? Fucking do something!!!

The Duke of Sussex says there is "a race against time" to halt global warming, adding that he is "troubled" by climate change deniers.

"I don't believe that there's anybody in this world that can deny science," he said.

He called it "an emergency", adding "the world's children are striking" after teenage activist Greta Thunberg led a worldwide protest on Friday.

Prince Harry is visiting Botswana as part of a tour of southern Africa.

He says it was the place he went to "to get away from it all" after his mother's death.

The duke had visited the country soon after Diana, Princess of Wales, died in August 1997 and had made "some of my closest friends" there.

"Now I feel deeply connected to this place and to Africa," he said during a visit to the Chobe Tree Reserve.
https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-politics-49836292

[font size="8"]Top 10 Investigates: Thomas Cook Shut Down
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Let’s spin it to win it! Oh hey it’s one of our patented clips without context!

He is aware that there’s only 329 million people in this country, right? I think Lance might have been off by a zero there. If he wasn’t then…

Spin it again! Hey it’s time for Top 10 Investigates!

It’s time to investigate beyond the headlines. This is Top 10 Investigates!

What happens when a holiday turns into a nightmare? While we in the United States don’t get the European style holidays that most of us only dream of, it can be a nightmare when the company who booked your vacation shuts down. That happened last week when one of England’s oldest companies, Thomas Cook, shut down entirely and ended it’s hotel and airline reservations, ruining the vacation prospects for thousands of people. In short, it’s a category 5 shit storm and it doesn’t look like it’s going to be resolved any time soon.

British tour operator Thomas Cook collapsed on Sunday night, stranding hundreds of thousands of travelers and putting 21,000 jobs at risk.

The 178-year-old company said in a statement that its board "concluded that it had no choice but to take steps to enter into compulsory liquidation with immediate effect" after talks on a financial rescue failed. All Thomas Cook bookings have been canceled, the UK Civil Aviation Authority tweeted.

Peter Fankhauser, Thomas Cook's chief executive, apologized to customers, employees, suppliers and partners.
"This marks a deeply sad day for the company which pioneered package holidays and made travel possible for millions of people around the world," Fankhauser said.

"Despite huge efforts over a number of months, and further intense negotiations in recent days, we have not been able to secure a deal to save our business. I know that this outcome will be devastating to many people and cause a lot of anxiety stress and disruption," he added.
https://www.cnn.com/2019/09/22/business/thomas-cook-collapse/index.html

Well, the Thomas Cook shutdown is having a whole lot of people being fooled because the economic implications of Thomas Cook being shut down are simply put, catastrophic. Add Brexit into the mix and you’re looking at a category 6 shit storm. The craziest thing is that some ½ million travelers got stranded all over the world. You heard that right – a half MILLION.

Thomas Cook, the world’s oldest travel company, suddenly collapsed on Monday, stranding hundreds of thousands of passengers across the world.

The British company, which has been operating since 1841 but in recent years has been struggling under $2 billion in debt, entered liquidation after failing to secure a deal with creditors and being denied a government bailout. All of its flights were canceled, and thousands of employees found themselves without work.

The chaotic scenes did not come at British airports—passengers who had not yet left were warned not to show up—but from airports abroad, where as many as 500,000 customers (at least 150,000 of whom were British residents) were stranded without a return trip home. The result: The British government is now conducting what is being called the country’s largest ever peacetime repatriation effort.

On Monday, the U.K.’s Civil Aviation Authority began organizing for British tourists to be flown back. The CAA said it expects to run 1,000 flights from 55 destinations to retrieve the British passengers. Some passengers are still waiting for guidance and worried about the possibility they may not recoup the cost of their vacations. (Thomas Cook operated its own airline, hotels, and resorts, but it also booked hotels and other travel amenities from third parties in its popular vacation packages). Many customers are guaranteed their money back under a British financial protection scheme that safeguards most package holidays sold by British businesses. Non-British travelers may have other aid from their home countries or travel insurance.
https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2019/09/thomas-cook-travel-company-collapse-details.html

Yeah so Thomas Cook was a whopping $2 billion in debt – another example of a company getting too big for its’ own good.. So how were dream holidays ruined for many Brittoners? Well, we Americans don’t get holidays like this but it must be nice to dream what it’s like. Even still, it must be horrible to feel stranded when it the company leaves you hanging like this.

Thomas Cook customers may have to wait as long as two months to receive a refund for holidays they have booked with the collapsed travel firm.

The Civil Aviation Authority (CAA) said direct debit customers would be refunded within 14 days but others would have to wait up to 60 days.

Lucy Aydinalp said the delay meant her "dream holiday" to the Dominican Republic in November was now ruined.

"I have three children who don't get their holiday; it's such a sad time."

Ms Aydinalp from Manchester was a Thomas Cook employee for six years up until the collapse of the holiday firm.

She is currently on maternity leave but previously worked in a Thomas Cook High Street store.
https://www.bbc.com/news/business-49876407

Yes, when disaster strikes the only thing to do is to press on. In fact it wasn’t reckless ransacking by hedge fund billionaires that brought down Thomas Cook, as one would have you believe. Instead it was gross managerial incompetence that brought down one of the world’s oldest travel companies. Yes, terrible management! As a certain world leader might say.

Almost a week after the collapse of Thomas Cook, the cost of failure looks as severe as feared. Repatriating 150,000 holidaymakers could mean a bill of £100m. Hoteliers have to be compensated, probably to the tune of tens of millions of pounds. And the biggest cost involves refunding customers for future bookings. The whole bundle could run to £500m. The travel industry has an insurance scheme, but taxpayers could still be on the hook for a shortfall.

Consideration must also be given to the pain caused to employees and customers. On social media, you can find desperate former Thomas Cook airline crew and branch staff appealing for new employment opportunities. Operation Matterhorn, the Civil Aviation Authority’s repatriation effort, has been slick but holidaymakers have nonetheless suffered stress and disruption.

Should the government have saved Thomas Cook instead? No. That argument was aired immediately after the company’s collapse but its credibility has weakened by the day.
https://www.theguardian.com/business/2019/sep/29/thomas-cook-failure-incompetence-not-corporate-greed

That’s it for Top 10 Investigates. Good day.

[font size="8"]Holy Shit
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Let’s give the wheel a good strong spin shall we? Chance! Oh sweet, I get a Get Out Of Jail Free card!

I’ll just put that away for later! Gather around my fair brothers and sisters of Kansas! It’s time to take a seat in the pew and pass the collection plate, for the Holy Church Of The Top 10 has convened and it’s time to remind you that the holiest among us are the most full of:

My fair congregation!! There is turmoil around the world over the future of the planet. But that said, the unholy, ungodly Dark One, whose name shall *NOT* be spoken in my church, has taken it upon himself to spread the world that people are free to worship the religion that they please! Except maybe for Islam, he hates that sort of thing. But that’s the Dark One, that’s not me. All are welcome in my church, you know that! So what is religious freedom?

Describing the USA as a country founded on religious tenets, President Donald Trump urged other nations Monday to join him in trying to end “religious persecution.”

“The United States is founded on the principle that our rights do not come from government,” Trump said at the United Nations. “They come from God.”

It was an unusual address, which the White House billed as the first time an American president convened such a meeting at the United Nations. Critics scoffed because of Trump’s immigration travel restrictions against predominantly Muslim countries and other policies.

Trump's push is a major departure from his tendency toward a go-it-alone strategy on foreign policy.

"Today, I ask all nations to join us in this urgent, moral duty," Trump said, announcing the United States is committing an additional $25 million to protect religious freedoms, religious sites and relics from attacks.
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2019/09/23/un-trump-pence-religious-freedom-global-agenda/2389704001/

Now is anyone really surprised that the Dark One, in all of his infinite GAWDLY wisdom, gets it wrong again? That’s why his name shall not be spoken in my church!!! So why is he pushing this so hard lately and what’s the incentive for him? There’s really no incentive for the churches other than they get screwed and their parishioners get subjected to hate and bigotry the likes of which we haven’t seen before that would make even JAYSUS squirm. But yeah this is what he’s proposing.

President Donald Trump announced new initiatives as part of a global call for protecting religious freedom at the United Nations General Assembly on Monday, which his aides have characterized as the centerpiece of his visit to the conference of world leaders.

Trump announced that the US would dedicate "$25 million to protect religious freedom, religious sites, and relics." In addition, the US will be "forming a coalition of US businesses for the protection of religious freedom."

Trump said he is the first US president to host such a meeting.
"That's very sad in many ways," he said. The President also called the issue one of his "highest priorities."

"Today, with one clear voice, the United States of America calls upon the nations of the world to end religious persecution. Stop the crimes against people of faith," Trump said. "Release prisoners of conscience. Repeal laws restricting freedom of religion and belief. Protect the vulnerable, the defenseless, and the oppressed."
https://www.cnn.com/2019/09/23/politics/donald-trump-religious-freedom-unga/index.html

Of course even the good LAWRD JAYSUS wants you to deal with it! But of course they get it wrong, especially when they fail to mention that one of the chief allies of this wretched administration is quite literally the WORST offender in terms of religious freedom: Saudi Arabia! By the way folks, give it up for my gospel choir how great are they? So who’s persecuting who? That is the question on the table here!

Nearly four years after proposing a ban on Muslim immigrants as part of his presidential campaign, Donald Trump devoted his first major appearance at this year’s United Nations General Assembly to religious liberty, a topic that has increasingly emerged as a central administration talking point.

“Approximately 80 percent of the world’s population live in countries where religious liberty is threatened, restricted, or even banned,” Trump said at the event, citing a statistic from a Pew Research Center report that also attributed anti-Muslim sentiment, in part, to him. “When I heard that number, I said, ‘Please go back and check it because it can’t possibly be correct.’ And, sadly, it was. Eighty percent.” (It’s actually 83 percent.)

Trump and his advisers, including Vice President Mike Pence and Secretary of State Mike Pompeo, love this statistic. They’ve invoked it several times during the administration’s months-long push to make religious freedom a central plank of American foreign policy, which has included two State Department summits and Trump’s Oval Office meeting in July with victims of religious persecution.

And while they’re quick to highlight American adversaries like Nicaragua and Venezuela, as Trump did in his Monday speech, they often fail to mention an ally which Pew rates as one of the worst suppressors of religious freedom: Saudi Arabia.
https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2019/09/donald-trump-un-religious-freedom-saudi-arabia/

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Yes, even the good LAWRD JAYSUS thinks this is ridiculous! I mean do we really want to join the Saudis as far as this goes? I think that my position on Saudi Arabia is known far and wide, and well, let’s just say I’m not a fan. Yeah leave it at that. But this might be the worst offender of this administration by far – and a prime example of why his name shall not be spoken in my church!

President Donald Trump said at the United Nations this week that "protecting religious freedom is one of my highest priorities." But his promise rings hollow to advocates for persecuted religious minorities seeking refuge in the United States.

Trump's administration already has slashed the nation's refugee admissions ceiling to a historic low and on Thursday proposed a further cut for next year, to 18,000 — an 84% drop from the cap proposed during the last year of Barack Obama's presidency.

The president's promotion of global freedom to worship prompted the State Department to set aside 5,000 refugee slots for religious minorities. But faith-based groups that resettle refugees had urged him to avoid more erosion of a program dedicated to helping the persecuted worshippers whose oppression Trump has decried.

The list of persecuted religious groups whose access to refugee admission has withered under Trump includes Christians in Iran, Syria, Pakistan, Myanmar and Sudan, as well as Iraqi Christians and Yazidis — whose mass slaughter and enslavement by the Islamic State was labeled "genocide " by Trump's State Department in 2017.
https://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/trump-condemns-religious-persecution-amid-refugee-squeeze-65936323

That’s why the Dark One’s name shall not be spoken in my church – for he is the face of EEVIL and hypocrisy – things that the good LAWRD does not stand for! Mass has ended, may you go in peace! That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]Beating A Dead Horse: The Joker Controversy
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Spin it to win it! Come on no whammy no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop!!! Clip without context!

No Bob it is happening and it’s happening because God is pissed!!! Spin it again! Oh it’s time for Beating A Dead Horse!

Can a movie be too dangerous? Ever since the 2012 shooting at the midnight showing of the Dark Knight Rises in Aurora, Colorado, naturally people have been a bit squeamish when it comes to the releases of new Batman movies since then. But the latest chapter in the 80 year old Batman saga – the origin story of Gotham’s favorite villain, the Joker is coming to life in a new movie being released this Friday. On one hand the movie is getting just unbelievable praise for Joaquin Phoenix’s portrayal of down on his luck stand up comedian who rises to become the ultimate supervillain that we all know and love. On the other hand, the movie just might be too good. So good that you might see some extra guests when you buy your movie tickets this weekend.

Amid concerns about potential violent situations, the opening weekend of Warner Bros’ controversial Joker in New York City will see an increased police presence both in and out of uniform.

Earlier this week, the NYPD’s Chief of Patrol Rodney Harrison told officers that the department plans to visibly station cops at theaters showing the Joaquin Phoenix-starring film. Now Deadline has learned that a significant undercover detachment will also be deployed to make sure nothing untoward occurs inside cinemas in Manhattan, the Bronx, Queens, Brooklyn and Staten Island.

“This is 360-degree policing approach to ensure safety for ticket buyers in their seats, as well as on the streets,” a law enforcement official said of the strategy to have plain-clothed police in a number of theaters in America’s largest city starting with the October 3 previews and throughout the expected heavily attended weekend. “If something happens inside one of the screenings, we intend to be able to pacify the situation quickly and conclusively,” the well-placed source added, noting that large-scale and security-hefty events go off without a hitch in New York every day.

Still, concerns about threats have bedeviled this latest take on Batman’s arch nemesis since Joker debuted at the Venice Film Festival in late August. Set in a near-collapsing and crime-invested Gotham City of 1981, the Todd Phillips-directed and Golden Lion-winning Joker, which co-stars Robert De Niro, pays distinct homage to Martin Scorsese’s 1976 film Taxi Driver and 1982’s King of Comedy – both of which featured his The Irishman lead De Niro and both of which were stationed in a decaying NYC.
https://deadline.com/2019/10/joker-movie-theaters-new-york-police-plan-opening-weekend-undercover-1202749565/

Yes, it is, Joker! I mean as if the world is getting crazier, now we have people making violent threats on movie theaters showing the Joker. So how did we get the Joker? Well let’s ask the film’s director, Todd Phillips, the guy responsible for beloved bro comedies like Old School and The Hangover who’s responsible for this controversy.

Joker director Todd Phillips has revealed how "woke culture" directly led to his upcoming take on the Clown Prince of Crime.

Prior to working on Joker, Phillips was primarily known for such comedies as Old School and The Hangover. In a profile on star Joaquin Phoenix in Vanity Fair, Phillips revealed how he began to find making comedies difficult due to "woke culture" and that directly led to Joker, which he pitched as a dark movie without many of the typical conventions of superhero movies.

“Go try to be funny nowadays with this woke culture,” he said. “There were articles written about why comedies don’t work anymore—I’ll tell you why, because all the f*cking funny guys are like, ‘F*ck this shit, because I don’t want to offend you.’ It’s hard to argue with 30 million people on Twitter. You just can’t do it, right? So you just go, ‘I’m out.’ I’m out, and you know what? With all my comedies—I think that what comedies in general all have in common—is they’re irreverent. So I go, ‘How do I do something irreverent, but f*ck comedy? Oh I know, let’s take the comic book movie universe and turn it on its head with this.’ And so that’s really where that came from.”

Despite initially positive reviews following the movie's premiere at the Venice Film Festival, Joker has proven controversial, with many wondering about the potential real world impact of the movie and its portrayal of violence. In September, a question about whether Joker might inspire violence led to Phoenix walking out of an interview. Still, despite the controversy, Joker is tracking to be a major box office success.
https://www.cbr.com/todd-phillips-woke-culture-ruined-comedy-joker/

Yes, why so serious, Todd? Really you’re blaming “woke culture” for the reason why nobody is going to see comedies anymore? Except you missed Zombieland, The Dead Don’t Die, Good Boys, Booksmart, Between Two Ferns, and Long Shot – all R rated comedies that did pretty well at the box office. Bro culture is going out the window for a different kind of humor. So yeah if you can’t be funny, be as violent as possible is the message we seem to be getting from this! But yeah let’s blame “woke culture”.

Joker, starring Joaquin Phoenix as a clown who eventually becomes Batman’s arch-nemesis, doesn’t hit theaters until Oct. 4. But the film has already caused a backlash, with some critics saying its message is dangerous while others continue to staunchly defend it.

Directed by Todd Phillips, Joker strays far from the cartoon villain known for tormenting Batman in the DC Universe comic books. In an origin story which explains the forces that shaped the character, Phoenix plays Arthur Fleck, a lonely man who lives with his mother and for whom life is a revolving door of disappointment, violence and isolation. The lack of love, and a feeling that the world is consistently beating him down, pushes Fleck into crime as he morphs into the murderous, now-iconic villain.

But for some critics, Fleck’s homicidal tendencies—which the movie depicts as having spawned from his sense of being treated badly at at every turn—cut a little too close to reality. In a time when headlines all too frequently report mass shootings and other acts of violence committed by people whose motivations are later tied to anger at the world or specific groups, they argue that giving the Joker such an origin story could encourage misplaced sympathy at best, and violence at worst. Here’s what to know about controversy surrounding the movie.

Critics who saw Joker during its run at the Venice and Toronto film festivals in late August and early September, respectively, have called it “dangerous”, “deeply troubling” and “a toxic rallying cry for self-pitying incels.” In a review that prompted a flood of angry reactions from the movie’s defenders, TIME’s film critic Stephanie Zacharek wrote: “In America, there’s a mass shooting or attempted act of violence by a guy like Arthur practically every other week. And yet we’re supposed to feel some sympathy for Arthur, the troubled lamb; he just hasn’t had enough love.”
https://time.com/5684823/joker-movie-controversy/

Yeah incels are the ones who really should take the blame here. I mean people who complain about “SJW” movies are the ones who are the biggest SJWs themselves. But really you know what people? Just watch the damn movie and take it in before you start shooting your mouth off on social media about how great it is or how much it sucks. I mean have we learned nothing from the Dark Knight Rises?

Every six months or so, there’s a movie that everyone has formed a strong opinion about long before it’s actually released in theaters. This fall, it’s Joker, the Warner Bros. film starring Joaquin Phoenix as the iconic Batman villain. Joker doesn’t officially come out until October 7th, meaning most of the people talking about it haven’t even seen it yet. Yet it has sparked a flurry of debate on topics ranging from gun violence to toxic masculinity to censorship to the Disney company monopoly. Even the U.S. military has weighed in, with a memo leaking earlier this week warning servicemen about credible threats of mass shootings at screenings of the film.

So what, exactly, is it about Joker that has engendered so much controversy? We tried to break it down for you.

Many claim the film is a romanticization of incel culture.
Joker tells the story of Arthur Fleck (Phoenix), a mentally ill aspiring comedian whose rejection by society prompts him to snap and embark on a life of crime. He is also rejected sexually by a single mother (Zazie Beetz) who lives next door to him. This narrative is very similar, in numerous ways, to that of many disenfranchised young white men who become radicalized, or black-pilled, and embark on shooting sprees. And this parallel was not lost on many critics, including Richard Lawson of Vanity Fair, who wrote that the film “may be irresponsible propaganda for the very men it pathologizes. Is Joker celebratory or horrified? Or is there simply no difference?” he asks.
https://www.rollingstone.com/culture/culture-features/joker-criticism-fallout-891081/

[font size="8"]This Fucking Guy: Rudy Giuliani
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Let’s give the wheel a good strong spin shall we? And it lands on… no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop!!! A random tweet!

https://twitter.com/RightWingWatch/status/1179094673064898562

Meanwhile prepare for nuclear Armageddon by buying my industrial grade 10 gallon bucket of mac n cheese! Just perfect for post-apocalypse dining! Guaranteed to last 10 years! Only 2 easy payments of $69.99 each! Spin it again. This Fucking Guy!

This week’s This Fucking Guy is none other than Trump’s own attorney – Rudy Giuliani! Well, they say crime doesn’t pay. But when your administration is full of criminals like the Trump administration is, well does it? Even Trump’s attorneys are criminals. Just look at his rotating cast of players. One crook in the Trump administration who still inexplicably remains is former New York Mayor and current poster boy for divorce lawyers and auditors everywhere, Rudy Guiliani. I mean whew, if you dig into what he’s been up to lately, it is the stuff of pure, 100% Grade A batshit fucking insanity.

House Democrats on Monday subpoenaed President Trump’s private lawyer, Rudolph W. Giuliani, a key figure in their impeachment inquiry, even as the president vowed to learn the identity of the anonymous whistle-blower whose accusations of presidential impropriety toward Ukraine lie at the center of the scandal.

The Giuliani subpoena punctuated another day of confrontation in the capital, rife with accusations by both Democrats in Congress and an increasingly combative president.

“Our inquiry includes an investigation of credible allegations that you acted as an agent of the president in a scheme to advance his personal political interests by abusing the power of the office of the president,” three Democratic House chairmen wrote in a letter to Mr. Giuliani, who has served as Mr. Trump’s personal representative in Ukraine.

Democrats also requested documents and testimony from three of Mr. Giuliani’s associates who are said to be connected to an effort to pressure the Ukrainians into investigating Democratic rivals of Mr. Trump. They promised more subpoenas for other witnesses in the coming days.
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/09/30/us/politics/impeach-giuliani-subpoena.html

Ha ha!!! Yes, Rudy is going down with the sinking GOP ship known as the SS Titanic. But the more you dig into Giuliani’s affairs, the more he is the perfect lawyer to represent Trump. This is the perfect example of that age-old cliché, “how the mighty have fallen”. Because if you remember after 9/11, there was talk that Guiliani was going to succeed Bush as president. Now he’s reduced to watching Youtube clips on his iPad because he can’t buy a TV. Yeah.

Former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani was praised for his handling of the attacks on September 11, 2001, but amid divorce proceedings, his wife, Judith Giuliani, criticized him for going from "hero" to "liar."

After 15 years of marriage, the the Giulianis filed for divorce in April. They initially told Page Six they hoped to do it "as amicably as possible," with the former mayor saying there were problems "on both sides."

However, The New York Times reported the couple's divorce has included fights over kitchen renovations, fountain pens, cigars and the dividing of their assets. They also argued over Rudy's income, which has decreased since he left a law firm to work for President Donald Trump pro bono.

Now, the two have a trial date set for January and Judith told The New York Times that court was the only way she could prove his financial worth and receive what she was entitled to.

"I feel betrayed by a man that I supported in every way for more than 20 years," Judith said. "I'm sad to know that the hero of 9/11 has become a liar."
https://www.newsweek.com/rudy-judith-giuliani-hero-september-11-liar-divorce-1459140

I’m pretty sure that’s live footage of Trump after finding out the predicament that his own private attorney is in. And if this guy is representing Trump, who are the good guys in this equation? Oh that’s right – there aren’t any! So the question remains – just what the hell are they hiding exactly? Well the only way to answer that question is to wait for the whistleblower.

It was another busy afternoon of news for Donald Trump’s associates caught up in the House’s impeachment inquiry.

The Wall Street Journal reported Monday that Secretary of State Mike Pompeo listened in on the phone call between Trump and Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky that triggered the whistleblower complaint at the heart of the matter.

House Democrats on Monday also announced they had subpoenaed Rudy Giuliani for his records related to the call in which Trump asked the country’s president to “look into” his political rival Joe Biden.

Pompeo and Giuliani are both strident defenders of the president, but Giuliani’s unwillingness to stick to careful talking points has placed the two men somewhat at odds. Giuliani, Trump’s lawyer and attack dog who has repeatedly confirmed his own guilt in the Ukraine story while muddling the White House’s messaging, placed some of the blame for the scandal on the State Department. He insisted that he had “40 texts from the State Department asking me to do what I did.” He asserted repeatedly that when he pressured Ukraine to investigate Biden, he was doing so for upright, officially sanctioned reasons. “A President telling a Pres-elect of a well known corrupt country he better investigate corruption that affects US is doing his job,” Giuliani tweeted after one bizarre CNN interview.
https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2019/09/trump-impeachment-inquiry-rudy-giuliani-subpoena-mike-pompeo.html

Yeah probably. As if that’s not enough that Trump’s fixer and cleaner may have committed treason, they’re knee deep in it! And by the way if you’re looking for the quality of person that Donald Trump associates himself with, just look no further than Rudy Giuliani! I mean all this and he’s got a podcast too, people! Just imagine the shit they will fling on this show!

If you want to know what Rudy Giuliani’s up to behind the scenes — just hang out at the Grand Havana Room cigar bar.

The former mayor was at the stogie spot amid hubbub over his boss’s impeachment, telling pals loudly that he’s launching a new podcast.

President Trump’s personal lawyer was spotted at the Grand Havana Room at 666 Fifth Ave. “holding court with a big crew. Huge smile on his face, laughing. You could literally see CNN and Fox News on the TVs behind him as everything was unfolding,” said a witness.

The podcast would only up Giuliani’s already-ubiquitous media presence. He’s been on the offensive defending Trump from accusations included in a whistleblower’s report that the president repeatedly pressured Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky to cooperate with Giuliani and investigate allegations of corruption against Hunter Biden.
https://pagesix.com/2019/09/26/rudy-giuliani-brags-about-new-podcast-in-cigar-bar/

Yeah if everything goes the way we think it will, Giuliani might be sharing a cell with Trump! That’s Rudy Giuliani, this week’s:

[font size="8"]People Are Dumb
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Now entering the spin zone! Come on no whammy no whammy no whammy… stop! Oh hey it’s another one of our patented clips without context!

Funny, I don’t remember that being part of the party platform! Spin it again! Oh hey it’s time for People Are Dumb!

Of course you know by now that people are people and people are dumb. I always love this segment because there’s plenty of these stories out there, they’re all crazy, and I could just spend all day posting these and talking about stupid people doing stupid things. So I want to start with this story out of Argentina where a couple who ran a Peruvian restaurant. If you’re going to smuggle drugs, maybe don’t do so through easily identifiable containers, like I don’t know, hollowed out dildos! Yes, this is a thing that happened!

Police in Argentina have arrested members of a gang of drug dealers accused of smuggling cocaine hidden inside plastic penises.

The cocaine-loaded members, of the kind found as costume adornments at party shops, were sold by dealers operating in the red light district of the city of La Plata, about 36 miles south of Argentina’s capital city of Buenos Aires.

A video showing 10 of the phallic containers was released by police following a bust on the home of a Peruvian couple alleged to have led the organization.

Police say they seized more than a kilo of cocaine, half a kilo of marijuana and the cocaine-loaded penises at the home of the couple, who managed a Peruvian restaurant called Little Corner of Peruvian Flavor (Rinconcito de sabor peruano).

The gang’s alleged leader was already serving time under house arrest at the moment of the raid.

According to investigators, hours of telephone intercepts revealed that the gang and its clients used special codes for their phone transactions: a “grandmother” represented 10 grammes of cocaine, while a “baby” was five grams.
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/sep/20/argentina-police-arrest-gang-accused-of-smuggling-cocaine-in-plastic-penises

Ah, I miss Robin Williams. It’s a rocket ship!!! Next up – continuing our international trek through People Are Dumb, we head to the Russian city of Leningrad where a group of grandmas destroyed children’s playground equipment. Yeah sorry Junior but grandma was angry at your sea saw, and well just don’t go outside for a while.

Two women in Russia's Leningrad region have been filmed destroying a children's seesaw after complaining about the noise.

Brandishing a saw, the two women took turns cutting the playground equipment into pieces.

Video of the incident was uploaded to social media network VKontakte on Wednesday, Russian media reports.

Since then, the footage has been shared widely, accumulating hundreds of thousands of views.

According to the regional Russian news service 78 News, the women were acting to help their 100-year-old neighbour, who had been disturbed by the noise.

In the video, residents can be seen remonstrating with the pair as bewildered children look on.
https://www.bbc.com/news/blogs-trending-49673953

By the way Vandal Grannies, I saw them at the Troubadour last week, awesome band! Next up – back in more familiar territory, America’s most penis shaped state, the state of Florida, always brings the crazy! And what is it about Florida that makes everyone just go fucking batshit crazy everywhere you go? Even the animals are crazy! I just… how does this happen where you are in a position where you get sit on by a camel?

Video surveillance capturing a bizarre encounter at an Iberville Parish truck stop shows a Florida couple trying to retrieve their deaf dog from a camel's enclosure before the startled 600-pound animal responds to the intrusion by sitting on the wife, prompting her to bite its genitalia to free herself. Authorities allege Gloria Lancaster, 68, and Edmond Lancaster, 73, were feeding their unleashed dog some treats near a pen belonging to Caspar the camel before the small pooch slipped under the fence and they crawled in after it. Video footage provided by the truck stop's owner Thursday shows the Pensacola, Florida-area couple not notice their dog stray away until it was on the camel's side of the fence.

The couple told Iberville Parish sheriff's deputies the camel attacked the dog, but the sheriff's office said the couple invaded the camel's space last Wednesday and cited them for trespassing and violating leash laws. Caspar, the largest animal at the roadside menagerie, is used to entertaining hundreds of visitors each week when they pull off Interstate 10 for a rest at the Tiger Truck Stop, 16 miles west of Baton Rouge. But the peculiar attraction has drawn fire from animal rights groups who for years have sought to remove the animals, including a tiger that was euthanized in 2017.

Video surveillance shows the couple appearing to shoo away the camel by swatting it when they tried to get their dog. During the frantic retrieval, the camel turns around and knocks Gloria Lancaster down and then sits on her for several seconds as her husband appears to try moving the massive mammal off her. She told deputies she bit the camel's genitals to free herself, according to witnesses and statements they gave to law enforcement.

"Edmond stated that his wife bit the camels (sic) private parts in desperation to get the camel off of her as it bit him on the left elbow," an affidavit says.
https://www.theadvocate.com/baton_rouge/news/communities/westside/article_28c414ea-e0a7-11e9-beb2-87479de5f583.html

Next up – what happens when you get pulled over by the cops for drug possession? Do you tell them the truth or do you run? Or do you pull what Clint Eastwood did in the Mule and just admit what you did and turn yourself? Oh spoiler alert – shut up! That movie was terrible and it was based on a true story – something you can easily look up using that weird thing called “Google”. Well, you can’t fault this woman for her honesty, at least!

During a traffic stop early Sunday, Jacqueline Hubbard did not hesitate to answer when a Florida cop asked if she “had any drugs on her person.”

The 59-year-old Hubbard, who was in the front passenger seat not wearing a seat belt, reportedly told a patrolman that she was in possession of crack cocaine that was stored in what she called her “felony purse.”

The purse, which was around Hubbard’s neck, contained two crack rocks, a small baggie of cocaine, and two glass crack pipes, according to arrest affidavits.

The contents of the "felony purse" resulted in Hubbard’s bust on two criminal charges: possession of drug paraphernalia, a misdemeanor, and possession of a controlled substance, a felony.
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/buster/cocaine/felony-purse-contents-673902

“Felony Purse” by the way – another great band name! Finally this week – another story out of the sunshine state and this one has everything! It has Florida Man, it has Florida Woman, it has fighting, it has potential cop murder, and they got caught doing the nasty. But this is why we do this segment and it has everything that we love about the Sunshine State in one story!

A Florida homeowner found two strangers having sex in her yard Monday afternoon, according to cops who arrested the pair on trespass and indecent exposure charges.

Officers responding to a 911 call confronted the couple around 5 PM as they were lying down in the yard. The suspects, Stephen James Dean, 36, and Teresa Ann Behan, 49, both smelled of alcohol and appeared intoxicated, police reported.

Asked what they were doing at the Margaret Street residence, Behan claimed that “James,” her “music promoter,” lived there. But Dean was more forthcoming, and “spontaneously uttered” that they were having sex in the yard, cops reported.

Dean and Behan were arrested for indecent exposure and trespassing, both misdemeanors. Behan was also charged with a pair of felonies after she allegedly kicked and punched a patrolman. Dean was also hit with a felony for allegedly threatening to kill two Key West cops.
https://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/florida/more-fun-in-key-west-305912

That’s it this week for:

[font size="8"]Keeping Up With The Candidates Ep.
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Let’s spin the wheel one final time this week! What? Go directly to jail? Nooooooooooooooooo!!!!!

Wait a minute, I've got that get out of jail free card! Sweeeeeeeeet!!! Ha, suck it!! Oh it’s time for Keeping Up With The Candidates!

Welcome back to our 2020 voter’s guide Keeping Up With The Candidates! While we may be a week behind on the news, we’re a year ahead in the polls because after what happened in 2016, we need to jump ahead by keeping track of all of the candidates – the highs, the lows, the drop outs, the senate, local and national candidates, and of course most importantly – the issues! Which is the subject of our guide this week. Now remember that episode of Seinfeld where Jerry went around and was asking people what their stance on abortion was? Well we’re going to pick a few candidates and simply ask – what is your stance on impeachment?

Other strategists said Warren can use the moment to remind voters how strongly she came out on the idea of impeachment, months before the Democratic-led House moved on it.

“She can justifiably take credit for helping lead the charge on impeachment,” said Democratic strategist Eddie Vale. “But then like Elvis she needs to keep taking care of business.”

Biden, for his part, has an opportunity to take the fight to Trump, as the architects of his campaign designed from the beginning.

“Much of how this turns out for Biden depends on him,” said Basil Smikle, who served as the executive director of the New York State Democratic Party. “He’s getting the one-to-one match-up with Trump he wanted when he kicked off his campaign."

“He just needs to show that strength in his interaction with Democratic opponents by deflecting arrows thrown at him and proactively launching some of his own,” Smikle added.
https://thehill.com/homenews/campaign/463447-impeachment-shakes-up-democratic-white-house-race

Elizabeth Warren is a solid *FOR* impeachment! I mean you can’t overlook the guy who made fun of your heritage the last 3 years and expect him to get away with it. Next up – Bernie Sanders! Where do you stand on impeachment? “Trump is a member of the upper 1%! He and his rich billionaire cohorts cannot get away with the implications of this crime!”.

Vermont Sen. and Democratic presidential candidate Bernie Sanders spoke Monday about his campaign and about the Republican incumbent, who he called “the most dangerous president in the modern history of this country.”

Sanders was referring, of course, to President Donald Trump, who is facing an impeachment inquiry launched by the Speaker of the House of Representatives.

“It doesn’t give me any pleasure to say this, because it will put the country through another trauma that we don’t need to go through. But I think you have a president who is incredibly corrupt, mostly focused on the needs of his own wealth and his own power. I think that he does not understand the Constitution. I don’t think he understands or respects the rule of law,” Sanders told WCVB during an interview in New Hampshire, where Sanders was campaigning for the second consecutive day.

“He is a racist and a sexist and a xenophobe and a religious bigot,” Sanders said about Trump. “It gives me no pleasure to say this, but this is the truth.”
https://www.wcvb.com/article/sen-bernie-sanders-believes-incredibly-corrupt-pres-trump-should-be-impeached/29309492

Count Bernie Sanders as a solid for! “I can’t believe Bernie is for impeachment. I mean he promised free refills on sodas for everybody. That’s socialism! I won’t stand for it!”. We’re pretty sure Trump didn’t say that but we’re also pretty sure that’s what he probably would say since we know he hate watches Saturday Night Live. Next up – Mayor Pete! Mayor Pete, come on down! Where do you stand on impeachment?

Pete Buttigieg is among the Democratic presidential candidates who publicly stated that they supported impeachment proceedings against President Donald Trump.

The mayor of South Bend, Indiana, first joined that chorus during a town hall event in April of 2019. At the time, Buttigieg said that he felt President Trump “deserves impeachment” but did not specifically call on Congress to do it.

But Buttigieg has also reiterated in TV interviews that he believes the only way to remove President Trump from office is to defeat him at the ballot box in 2020. He told MSNBC on September 23, the day before House Speaker Nancy Pelosi announced the beginning of a formal impeachment inquiry, that he did not believe the Republican-controlled Senate would vote to remove him.

Hours after the announcement, Buttigieg spoke about the beginning of the impeachment proceedings with CNN’s Chris Cuomo. “This is a moment of truth for the country. This is a moment of truth for the Republican party. Sooner or later it had to come because any one of these abuses that we’ve seen over recent years, any one of them could have been career-ending for any other president… now, the constitution is kicking in and there’s going to be a process that leads to some sort of accountability.”
https://heavy.com/news/2019/09/pete-buttigieg-trump-impeachment-inquiry/

Woohoo!!! That’s 3 for 3! Everyone is a solid for so far! Do we need to go any further? No? I think 3 in a row is a pretty solid majority. But how are they handling it where it counts – on the campaign trail? I mean maybe you don’t make it the primary issue. Instead focus on the positive, not the negative, because that is what will win votes!

As House Democrats push forward with their impeachment inquiry of President Trump, the Democratic presidential candidates continue to make their case on the campaign trail — often ignoring the drama in Washington.

A case in point came Monday, in Manchester, New Hampshire, where Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders held a town hall to push his signature Medicare For All plan.

"Despite spending $11,000 for every man, woman and child woman in this country, we have 87 million people who are uninsured or under-insured," Sanders said.

Sanders made just one passing reference to the latest scandal engulfing the president, saying, "I don't want to get into the whole Trump thing." Instead, he stayed focused on his signature proposal, which would do away with private insurance, premiums and co-pays — replacing them with a government-run system.
https://www.wbur.org/news/2019/10/01/democratic-race-president-trump-warren-sanders-impeachment-inquiry-campaign-trail

[font size="4"]Next Week:[/font]

We’re going to Indiana to hang out with the mayor of South Bend, Pete Buttigieg!

[font size="8"]And Now This:[/font]
[font size="8”]Steel Pulse[/font]

Ladies and gentlemen, my next guest is celebrating their 45th year as a band, they have a new album called Mass Manipulation. You can see them on tour through New Year’s, and that stop is at the Belly Up in San Diego. Playing their song “Cry Cry Blood”, give it up for Steel Pulse!!

Thank you Kansas University! We’re taking a short break next week, we’ll be back on October 16th with a brand new edition live from Arizona State! See you in two weeks!

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This is the official DU account for the new format Top 10 Conservative Idiots separate from the host account Initech. The new format Top 10 will launch June 13th, 2018 and all posts related to the Top 10 (promos, etc) will be posted from this account only. The Top 10 is posted once a week on Thursdays at 2:00 PM. There is a full archive of all past, present and future Top 10 editions that can be found here: https://www.democraticunderground.com/100218599098\ Announcements for our current season schedule are posted in our Best Of editions that appear at the end of each season. Updates are posted regularly on the official Top 10 Mastodon account and the official Holy Shit Mastodon account. The Mastodon accounts are used to announce what's going to be in next week's edition, new content, advertising our segments, and so on. This account will post official Top 10 editions, and any related content including our spinoff series: Holy Shit The Sunday Sermons. If you wish to contact the Top 10 you may do so here: E-mail (all questions, concerns, suggestions, and hate mail welcome): Top10ConIdiots@gmail.com Follow the Top 10 on Mastodon: Top10ConIdiots@mstdn.party Follow The Holy Church Of The Top 10 on Mastodon: ChurchOfTop10@mstdn.party **This account will ONLY be used to post official Idiots editions, promos, and things related to the Top 10. No other posts will come from this account** Top 10 Wiki: https://www.democraticunderground.com/100211322508