Betcha Melania has a rolling pin ready for Dirty Donny's homecoming

In the annals of human relationship, it is, I suspect, noteworthy that Cohen testified yesterday that he liked and respected Melania, but that he passionately regretted having to LIE to her about Dirty Donny*s ADULTEROUS republican affairs. The republican family-values role model Dirty Donny* made his longtime fixer, Cohen, lie to his wife about his routine, habitual f*cking around behind her back.

Put yourself in her $1,500 Manolo Blahnik spike heels for a minute, and imagine how you would feel about that skanky scrap of testimony broadcast before the entire world. I'd bet a cup of vinegar that it registered KICKASS on the piss-me-off marital scale.



* aka republican Draft-Dodger-in-Chief

Revealing line from Cohen's written testimony

This would be a good epitaph for the tombstone of the republican Draft-Dodger-in-Chief, Comrade Dirty Donny (R)

As tweeted this AM
Maggie Haberman @maggieNYT 1

“He is capable of behaving kindly, but he is not kind. He is capable of committing acts of generosity, but he is not generous. He is capable of being loyal, but he is fundamentally disloyal.”

Nano-narcisissm

Zombie Harold Stassen* tosses hat into Presidential contest

"I have come back from THE BEYOND to root out and defeat the KGOP republican enemies of truth, justice, freedom, and The American Way. The profound harm they are doing to America cannot be tolerated. Therefore, I have climbed out of my cozy crypt, and will henceforth haunt by day and by night the KGOP's Comrade Dirty Donny, aka the deceitful and ignoble republican Draft-Dodger-in-Chief." - Zombie Stassen (WD)

Then a great cry arose from republican ranks: "Make Mexico Pay"

Oh, wait, my bad. That's not really happening. I guess I was dreaming. Unless, I wonder, you don't suppose it was all a big, fat, stinking republican lie from the git-go?

Instead republicans are going to make you (Mr. & Ms. Hard-working, Tax-paying Citizen of the USA) pay for the stupid, ugly, evil, needless republican wall that will keep the money flowing to russian mobsters.

Ha ha, we've all been suckered again by the republicans and the lies of their casino-hustling, republican Draft-Dodger-in-Chief. Ha ha. What stupid suckers we American taxpayers are. Guess we'll all just need to be "good sports" about it.

It's a great day for luxury, gourmet, tax-funded GOLF!

Gosh, wouldn't it be swell if the republicans would use our tax money to set us all up for a couple of days of glorious, golden, sunny, fabulous gourmet golf ?

Ha ha, suckers. Unless you are a republican "billionaire" casino hustler who dodged the draft five freaking times, cheated contractors, and lied repeatedly to America, you are shit out of luck. republicans say you are on your own, and should pull yourself up by your own Bruno Magli patent leather booties.

Instead, they suggest, why don't you spend the day cleaning your toilets, or basement, or better yet: write out a nice fat check to the IRS so republicans can continue to gin up the excitement around their FAKE emergency, and play with their diamond-studded putters.

Did the republican Draft-Dodger-in-Chief sign the bipartisan budget bill ???

Everybody is honking about the fake "republican emergency."

But I can't seem to find anything saying whether he signed the bi-partisan bill, or just pissed on it.

BarrBurr BarrBurr BarrBurr (KGOP)

Baaaaaaaaaaah!

That is all.

Grazie Mille to all bestowers of hearts

Thank you for supporting DU, and for acknowledging me.

We are the Champions. Of the World.

Deal with it. Celebrate it. And notice that with admirable humility, I will make no reference whatsoever to the Red Sox World Series triumph.