red dog 1
red dog 1's JournalIrish Joke
Milo says to Paddy,
"Close your curtains the next time you're shagging your wife. the whole street was watching
and laughing at you yesterday."
Paddy replies:
"Well, the joke's on them stupid bastards because I wasn't even home yesterday."
The Deaf Wife Problem (Joke)
Ed feared his wife Peg wasn't hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid.
Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family doctor to discuss the problem.
The doctor told him there was a simple informal test the husband could perform to give the doctor a better idea about her hearing loss.
"Here's what you do," said the doctor, "Stand about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone, see if she hears you.
If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response."
That evening, his wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he was in the den.
He says to himself, "I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens."
Then, in a normal tone, he asks "Honey, what's for dinner?"
No response.
So the husband moves closer to the kitchen, about 30 feet from his wife, and repeats:
"Peg, what's for dinner?"
Still no response.
Next, he moves into the dining room, where he's about 20 feet from his wife, and asks
"Honey, what's for dinner?"
Again he gets no response.
So he walks up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away, "Honey, what's for dinner?"
Again there is no response.
So he walks right up behind her, "Peg, what's for dinner?"
"For God's sake Ed, for the FIFTH time, CHICKEN."
The Little Girl and the Construction Crew
A young girl was looking out the window at the construction crew who were beginning to build a house on the empty lot next door.
She watched with amazement as they poured the cement for the foundation and decided to go outside to get a better view.
The construction workers waved to her, and she waved back.
Soon she was talking to them and asking questions about the work they were doing.
They enjoyed talking to her as much as she enjoyed talking to them.
After a while, they gave her little jobs to do around the site.
At the end of the week, they gave her a check for the work she had done.
When she showed the check to her mother, her mother suggested that she take the check to the bank and open her own account.
At the bank, she proudly handed the check to the teller.
The teller asked her where she had gotten the check from, and she told the teller that she had been helping the men building the house next door.
"Oh my," the teller replied, "Will you be helping them again?"
"Yes," the little girl replied, "As soon as the assholes from Home Depot deliver the fucking sheet rock."
Politico's Poll Showing Democrats In Trouble This Midterm Election is a Total Crock
Source:
Politicususa.com
By Justin Baragona
May 19, 2014
This week, political news site Politico released a poll showing that Democrats are at a seven-point disadvantage against Republicans in the upcoming midterm elections.
The poll is supposed to reflect voter sentiments in the most competitive House and Senate races this year.
For the House races. the poll shows that Democrats trail Republicans by 9 points. 39%-30%.
As for the Senate, Republicans hold a seven-point advantage, 43%-36%.
This poll seems to predict a gloomy outcome for the Democrats in November.
It is certainly possible that Republicans can gain control of the Senate and retain their majority in the House.
However, this poll is s total crock.
It is always important to look into the methodology used by a poll to see how credible it is.
In this instance, the poll was tilted heavily in Republicans' favor from the outset, creating the results that we see.
The claim of the poll is to show "competitive" House and Senate races, so the interviewees were only from those areas.
Yet the poll shows that 39% of the respondents are Republicans, 34% stated that they're Democrats....Only 26% identified as Independents.
Compare this with the country at large, where 31% identify as registered with the Democratic Party, 25% identify as Republican, and 42% claim to be Independents.
Read more:
http://www.politicususa.com/2014/05/19/politicos-poll-showing-democrats-trouble-midterm-election-total-crock.html
7 Things About the Inevitability of Hillary Clinton You Probably Haven't Thought About
AlterNet
May 7, 2014
By Guy Saperstein
"In December, 2007, just as the 2008 presidential primaries were beginning to heat up, and with Hillary Clinton 26 points ahead in national polling of Democrats, I wrote an article for AlterNet arguing that she was beatable, that she had vulnerabilities the other candidates did not have, that she had historically high 'unfavorables,' that she polled poorly against Republicans and that Democrats should rethink the "inevitability" of her candidacy.
Apparently, they did, and we know how that turned out.
Once again, Clinton is riding high in polling of Democrats; once again, her supporters are claiming she is "inevitable," and once again she has vulnerabilities other candidates lack, including extremely high "unfavorables," as well as additional liabilities in 2016 she didn't have in 2008 --
some of her own making, some not."
More:
http://www.alternet.org/news-amp-politics/seven-things-about-inevitability-hillary-you-probably-havent-thought-about/
The Penguin Joke
2 penguins on an ice flow.
1st Penguin says. "You look like you're wearing a tuxedo."
2nd penguin says. "What makes you think I'm not?"
America's Ongoing Rebellion for Fairness and Justice
Jim Hightower
April 29, 2014
The corporate Powers That Be keep thinking we'll stay hitched to their plow no matter how severely they lash us economically and kick us politically.
But, to borrow one of George W.'s convoluted phrases, they're badly "misunderestimating" America's workaday people.
As the Occupy Wall Street movement demonstrated, and as shown by the ongoing actions od fast-food workers and others who've been shunted into poverty-wage jobs, we Americans are innately rebellious....In fact, from the revolutionary Declaration of 1776 forward, Rebellious R Us!
Shays rebellion in the 1780s, strikes by women mill workers in the early 1800s, the Populist movement of the 1880s, and on into today's uprisings, we've never taken well to the moneyed powers grabbing more for themselves at our expense -- and now they are grabbing more than ever.
Wall Street elites, corporate profiteers, and inheritors of multi-billion-dollar fortunes are trying to divert our attention from their oligarchic greed by spending lots of money on PR campaigns, front groups, and politicians to tell us that "Big Government" is our problem.
I was born at night, but not last night!..The ones knocking down the middle class and holding down the poor today are the same elites, profiteers, and heirs.
The corporate media won't talk much about this reality, but a growing majority see it and are participating in a spreading rebellion against it...Because, after all, they are experiencing the abuse.
The great anthem by rocker Patti Smith pretty well sums up where we Americans are -- and where I think we're going.
"People have the power - to dream, to rule, to wrestle the world from fools."
Ordinary folks are awakening to the realization that the fools have seized power, and the folks are now making moves (and movements) to seize the fools by their short hairs and reclaim our dreams.
http://www.jimhightower.com/
Democratic Election Official Rules All Restrooms In Dade County Closed On Election day
Jim Hightower
April 24, 2014
FLORIDA OFFICIAL CAN'T SEEM TO GET THE HANG OF RUNNING ELECTIONS
It's our civic duty to vote, right?....Well, that depends on who you are....The disgusting reality is that many of the power elites don't want certain people to vote, so they go to extremes to discourage and even harass those people to prevent them from exercising their civil right.
In 2012, Florida's highest officials disgraced their offices by engaging in this thuggish electoral thievery.
Republican Governor Rick Scott and his party's legislative henchmen officially rammed voter suppression into law, targeting Latino, African-American, student, elderly and other likely-Democratic voters.
From purging such people from voting rolls to making them use broken-down voting machines, voters in Democratic-leaning precincts faced procedural chaos and up to six-hour-waits --deterring at least 200,000 Floridans from casting their ballots.
But now comes an added discouragement in Miami, where a ruling by a Democratic election official will literally leave voters p.o.'d.
Advocates for People with Disabilities had asked whether rest rooms in Miami-area polling places will be accessible to voters in wheelchairs or having other physical needs.
They expected to get "yes" for an answer, as required by the Americans with Disabilities Act,
but instead they got this jaw-dropping shocker:
"In order to ensure that individuals with disabilities are not treated unfairly, the use of restrooms by the voters is not allowed on election day."
Yes, in a perverted twist of logic, "fairness" to people with special needs will be assured by treating everyone unfairly.
Thus, the political right to vote will be trumped by the biological need to pee -- especially if they wait in line six hours.
More:
http://www.jimhightower.com/node/8314#.U1mAy3Q5mTM
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10024799969/
http://www.democraticunderground.com/10024816197#top/
How Evil Will a Republican Be To Deny a Poor Person Health Care?..This Evil.
Daily Kos
April 22, 2014
By Joan McCarter
Back in February, news broke of Georgia Gov. Nathan Deal's efforts to make sure that no governor of Georgia could ever decide to take Medicaid expansion, giving the legislature veto power over any future governor's decision to do so.....But it's not just Deal.
Kansas Gov. Sam Brownback is doing it too.
Georgia and Kansas have left a combined 487,000 residents uncovered under Obamacare because they refused to expand Medicaid....And, though the law remains unpopular, a recent poll found that majorities of Georgians (54 percent) and Kansans (53 percent) support Medicaid expansion.
One of the architects of the Affordable Care Act, Jonathan Gruber told Harold Pollack that the Republican resistance to Medicaid expansion - leaving nearly 5 million people deliberately out of the system - is "almost awesome in it's evilness."
With Deal and Brownback, I think we can get rid of that "almost" qualifier.
http://www.dailykos.com/story/2014/04/22/1293881/-How-evil-will-a-Republican-be-to-deny-a-poor-person-health-care-This-evil
Stop the Slaughter...Tell Canada to End the Seal Hunt
Source:
International Fund for Animal Welfare
Right now baby seals are being killed in the commercial hunt in Canada.
People around the world continue to say "no" to seal products, but the Canadian government stubbornly continues trying to sell these cruel products.
They are fighting the EU ban at the WTO and trying to overturn the ban in Russia.
The bans must be defended!
Last year, 88,573 innocent baby seals were reported clubbed or shot - many as young as 21 days old.
They were killed for products no one wants or needs.
Last year the sealers admitted dumping 6,000 pelts into the ocean because there were no markets for them
Seal pups lie defenseless on the ice as hunters approach; but even the fastest pups are no match for men with clubs or rifles....The pups die in agony.
The seal hunt has a long history; but it's a relic of the past.
Rather than determine a plan to help sealers transition out of the failing industry, the Canadian government has thrown away over $50 million in tax dollars since 1996 trying to prop up the industry
There is no reason for this merciless slaughter to continue.
The fight to protect seals is more urgent than ever.
Ask the Canadian government to end commercial sealing
http://www.ifaw.org/united-states/get-involved/end-canadas-seal-hunt/
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Gender: MaleHometown: San Francisco, Ca.
Home country: U.S.A.
Member since: Tue Sep 14, 2010, 03:05 PM
Number of posts: 27,845
