DU Golfers, A Topic From The Course

[ProfessorGAC]

After 9, 2 of the 8 had to go home.
The rest of went out together, so a six some. (Yeah, I know, but we're all really fast, and nobody was within 2 holes of us.)
We were talking about the highest number we ever saw anybody post on one hole.
Three of the guys said they always had folks pick up at 10.
Other 2 guys had numbers. I had 2, because one is amazingly honest, and one happened in a tournament.
Story 1:

Played in a credit union outing for directors & staff. 11th hole at one course is super tough. Water left, the whole way, deep fescue right and at around 120 yards you have to cross the water.
One of the guys in my group took a 22! I gave him credit for honesty and perseverance.

Story 2:

Playing in a county tournament. Guy I played with regularly goes 4 under in 1st round. 2 under on front 9, 2nd day. Birdies 10. He's 7 under with 8 to play, 2 stroke lead.
3 wood off tee, blocked right, to bad lie. Smart play, punches to safe area, 80 yards out. Shanks 4 in a row into the water!!!! He was lying 2, now he's lays 10.
On green in 11, 3 putts (he was out of his mind at this point).
He shot 14. A dectuple bogey. He went from 7 under to 3 over in one hole. Finished last in the championship flight as he was 2 over from there. 5 A flight guys beat him because he took a 14!!!

What's the worst you've seen or heard about?

[Thomas Hurt]

1. This is some kind of weird golf code langauge right?

[ProfessorGAC]

2. I Did Say "Golfers"

So yeah, I guess so!

[underpants]

3. My foursome was 10 over in a best ball tournament

We were bad and were getting hammered. We had fun.

I think I’ve seen a 17 before.

[dem4decades]

4. The worst? 1st hole, 3 guys record all 6's. the fourth guy hits

his first tee shot out of bounds. Second tee shot goes in the woods, he takes his ball and improves his lie so he has a shot at the green. He lands short, pitches up and two putts.

The guy keeping score asks him what he got and he says " I have to say 5".

[ProfessorGAC]

5. Good One!

Sounds like how PINO keeps score!

[Foolacious]

6. Yeah, I've played with some guys who keep their own score like that.

One fellow never lost a ball in the woods. He always found the ball. Eventually. Somehow. When no one else was with him.

[dem4decades]

7. we're all friends but after each of us said 6 it would have been fine if he lied and said 6 instead

he shit on all of us. Ever since that time everyone watches him. We won't say anything except to each other, It's non stop, he doesn't count strokes and improves his lie by yards. Yesterday he had a birdie, I was informed later that he moved his ball out of the heavy rough for his second shot. Why keep score?

[DEbluedude]

8. I am the proud owner of two "Dead Ass Last" trophies.

[SCantiGOP]

9. Golf is not supposed to be a blood sport

I think every time I play there’s been a “triple bogey pickup” rule.
Two years ago I hit a perfect wedge shot on a Par 5 from just inside the 100 yard marker, took one bounce and rolled like a perfect putt into the hole. Guys waiting on a tee box adjacent to the green clapped and yelled, “Eagle or birdie?” My group was choking they were laughing so hard as I yelled out, “A damn proud bogey!”

[ProfessorGAC]

10. Great Story!

BTW, 2 weeks ago tomorrow, I knocked in a 4 iron from 170 out for a 2.
It was in a scramble, but we chose my drive, so it was a natural eagle.
I've lost count of eagles since it was 60 something.
But, never on a par 3.
No aces, for me.
I agree with you on the "bloodsport" thing.
We're all recreational golfers. Recreation is supposed to be fun, for goodness sake.
When that guy shot the 22, I was actually helping another guy in the group look for his ball.
I saw him hit three balls into the water, until I told him, "hit it over there". It still need to be over the pond, but was so short he relaxed.
I didn't realize he hit 7 in the water, plus 8 more shots.
If I knew, I would have told him to drive up to the green. He wasn't going to break 115 even if he parted that hole.
Created his own misery. Had I been more observant, it wouldn't have occurred.
As to the other guy...
Well, this was competition with $1,000 for first place, $600 for second. I think 3rd was $200. I finished 4th. I got a money clip and $50 in the pro shop.
That makes it more serious, and perhaps bloodier.

[SCantiGOP]

12. Yeah, I've won a couple of those '$50 pro shop' certificates

They often end up being two nice pairs of socks.
I took my son to Harbourtown at Hilton Head (where they play the Heritage Tournament, normally the week after the Masters) a few years ago, and he decided to try a 200 yard shot over water instead of laying up. I made him a safe bet and told him I would buy him a shirt in the Pro Shop if he hit the green.
We still call that his “$85 golf shirt.”

[Dem2theMax]

11. Since you are all talking about golf, I have to share a funny story.

Some years ago I was staying at a neighbor's house, watching their dog while they were on vacation. While they were gone, I received a phone call from yet another neighbor down the street. He was looking for a missing golf club.

He had looked high and low, couldn't find it. Turns out he had played golf with the gentleman who was on vacation, and he thought maybe he left it in the back of that man's SUV. So I looked. Nope, no golf club. I looked all over the house, on the off-chance that the gentleman who was on vacation had found it and had put it somewhere for safekeeping. Nope, no golf club.

A few days go by, and I get another phone call from the man who had lost his golf club. He found it!

Where was it? In a closet in his house. He had had such a bad game with one particular club, that he brought it home and put it in the closet for punishment! And then totally forgot that he had done so!



I couldn't believe he actually called me to admit he had done this. We laughed our heads off. And every time I saw him, we would start laughing. His name was Jay. He has since passed away. But I will always remember this, and him.

[SCantiGOP]

13. The proper way to handle a club like that

Is to launch it into the nearest pond while using every curse word you know.

[Dem2theMax]

14. LOL!

I knew people would relate to this story!

[ProfessorGAC]

16. Here's My Funny Club Story

Credit union outing. One of partners is a fellow director who represented the cops. He was a police captain. Wonderful guy, crappy golfer. Probably shot 110-115 that day.
One par 5, he hit a pretty good drive. Then low right squib. Another. Another near a bunker.
He tells he thinks there's something wrong with the club. I tell him "Let me have a look."
I look at it and threw it into the bunker, telling me to leave it there.
It was a 2 iron!
I told him "Jim, you're not good enough to hit a 2 iron. I'm going to shoot 72 today and you'll be 40 shots higher. I don't have a 2 iron!"
A couple years later, when my dad died, I sold him the clubs I bought for my dad for $25.

[world wide wally]

15. One time I had to take a sideways 8 (infinity)