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milestogo

(16,829 posts)
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 08:58 PM Jun 2020

Update: He died overnight at home. (Tonight I'm saying goodbye to my 12 year old dog.)

Last edited Tue Jun 23, 2020, 07:31 AM - Edit history (1)

He died in my bed. I was holding him and petting him all night and I knew it was the end. I am in shock that he is gone.

Thank you everyone, for your kind words and support.


He had his pancreas removed in March due to a carcinoma of the duodenum. He became diabetic. He as had health issues the entire time and on Saturday he stopped eating. Today they did an ultrasound and found that the cancer has grown back.

I took him home tonight to say goodbye. Tomorrow morning he will be euthanized.

I did everything I could to try to save his life, to no avail.

I'm devastated.

93 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Update: He died overnight at home. (Tonight I'm saying goodbye to my 12 year old dog.) (Original Post) milestogo Jun 2020 OP
I am sorry. 12 yrs of constant love and care, that is a long time. Peace to you both. LizBeth Jun 2020 #1
thank you, lizbeth milestogo Jun 2020 #37
So sorry to hear this. You did all you could. cayugafalls Jun 2020 #2
thank you milestogo Jun 2020 #38
So sorry. Best wishes. JDC Jun 2020 #3
Thank you. milestogo Jun 2020 #39
I am so sorry. My 4 cats are all getting up there in age (15.5; 15; 10; 7.5) I dread tblue37 Jun 2020 #4
They don't live long enough. milestogo Jun 2020 #40
Yes. Dogs, too. nt tblue37 Jun 2020 #54
I am very sorry. madaboutharry Jun 2020 #5
Thanks. milestogo Jun 2020 #41
So, so sorry 😢 TruckFump Jun 2020 #6
Thanks, me too. milestogo Jun 2020 #42
I'm so sorry! That decision is so, so hard. The Velveteen Ocelot Jun 2020 #7
I'm sorry for your losses. milestogo Jun 2020 #43
I know exactly what you are going through, tonight. Frustratedlady Jun 2020 #8
thank you milestogo Jun 2020 #44
((miles)) blm Jun 2020 #9
... milestogo Jun 2020 #45
We have had to do this too many times... Freedomofspeech Jun 2020 #10
Thanks. milestogo Jun 2020 #46
So so sorry 😢 SheltieLover Jun 2020 #11
Thank you. milestogo Jun 2020 #47
You are welcome SheltieLover Jun 2020 #62
So so sorry. redstateblues Jun 2020 #12
thank you milestogo Jun 2020 #48
I'm so sorry. We had to put our 14 year old cat to sleep last week ms liberty Jun 2020 #13
damn cancer milestogo Jun 2020 #49
I'm so sorry milestogo. You both fought hard. Hugs for you and your livetohike Jun 2020 #14
Thank you. milestogo Jun 2020 #50
I am so sorry for you bottomofthehill Jun 2020 #15
Thank you. milestogo Jun 2020 #51
I'm extremely sorry. Letting them go is so very hard. But he sinkingfeeling Jun 2020 #16
thanks for saying that milestogo Jun 2020 #52
My little 17 year old dog died on June 2 BigmanPigman Jun 2020 #17
I'm sorry milestogo Jun 2020 #53
I would miss mine when she was gone only two hours BigmanPigman Jun 2020 #89
My dog didn't eat all day Saturday, and I thought he was dying then. milestogo Jun 2020 #90
The vet who did come and put her to sleep BigmanPigman Jun 2020 #91
What is his name? LakeArenal Jun 2020 #18
Oliver milestogo Jun 2020 #55
You did everything right; there was no more you could do. And tomorrow morning, you'll again Karadeniz Jun 2020 #19
Thank you. milestogo Jun 2020 #56
I'm sorry for your loss vercetti2021 Jun 2020 #20
Thank you. milestogo Jun 2020 #57
I'm very sorry. brer cat Jun 2020 #21
Thanks. milestogo Jun 2020 #58
Oh no. I'm so so sorry to hear this. MontanaMama Jun 2020 #22
Thank you. milestogo Jun 2020 #59
Hold him tight and remember all of the love he gave you Kaiserguy Jun 2020 #23
Thank you. milestogo Jun 2020 #60
So sorry milestogo. I hope you can find comfort knowing that you have done everything littlemissmartypants Jun 2020 #24
thank you milestogo Jun 2020 #61
Sorry to hear this. I know it is tough. Midnight Writer Jun 2020 #25
Thank you. milestogo Jun 2020 #63
I am so sorry. Solly Mack Jun 2020 #26
Thank you. milestogo Jun 2020 #64
Holding you and your buddy in my heart. n/t TygrBright Jun 2020 #27
Thank you. milestogo Jun 2020 #65
I absolutely dread this day. BobTheSubgenius Jun 2020 #28
My last one lived to be almost 16, but he had lots of problems along the way. milestogo Jun 2020 #66
So sorry. FuzzyRabbit Jun 2020 #29
I hope he knew. milestogo Jun 2020 #67
Believe me, Oliver knew. niyad Jun 2020 #78
thank you milestogo Jun 2020 #84
Love and light to your and your companion. 😥❤ flibbitygiblets Jun 2020 #30
thank you milestogo Jun 2020 #68
I'm sorry, having him home during the process will comfort him Ellipsis Jun 2020 #31
I had him home overnight and he died in my bed at dawn. milestogo Jun 2020 #69
Lady of the Beasts, please take Your little one gently home in Your loving arms, and send niyad Jun 2020 #32
Thank you. Its very hard. milestogo Jun 2020 #70
I saw your update, and am glad that he was in your arms to the last. niyad Jun 2020 #77
thank you milestogo Jun 2020 #83
That was a really beautiful sentiment, niyad. flibbitygiblets Jun 2020 #76
It is my prayer as we say goodbye to our beloved companions. niyad Jun 2020 #80
Deepest condolences. Behind the Aegis Jun 2020 #33
Thank you. milestogo Jun 2020 #71
I saw your update. Behind the Aegis Jun 2020 #75
Oh, I Am So Very Sorry DarthDem Jun 2020 #34
Thank you. milestogo Jun 2020 #72
I am so sorry for the coming loss of your beloved dog. phylny Jun 2020 #35
Yes he had a good life. milestogo Jun 2020 #73
Saw the update - again, I'm sorry. The Velveteen Ocelot Jun 2020 #36
I'm not sure how aware he was. milestogo Jun 2020 #74
... Skittles Jun 2020 #79
thanks skittles milestogo Jun 2020 #82
I know the feeling Skittles Jun 2020 #86
I'm so sorry... Phentex Jun 2020 #81
thank you milestogo Jun 2020 #85
Farewell Oliver, Run Free, Awoooooo! Donkees Jun 2020 #87
Made me laugh and cry... milestogo Jun 2020 #88
Oh no, I am so very sorry! Rhiannon12866 Jun 2020 #92
Thank you. milestogo Jun 2020 #93

cayugafalls

(5,631 posts)
2. So sorry to hear this. You did all you could.
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 09:00 PM
Jun 2020

I'm sorry your losing your friend.

I wish there was more I could do.

tblue37

(64,982 posts)
4. I am so sorry. My 4 cats are all getting up there in age (15.5; 15; 10; 7.5) I dread
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 09:01 PM
Jun 2020

losing them. It's hard to let them go.

milestogo

(16,829 posts)
40. They don't live long enough.
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 12:33 PM
Jun 2020

Just long enough for us to get deeply attached and have our hearts broken.

TruckFump

(5,812 posts)
6. So, so sorry 😢
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 09:04 PM
Jun 2020

I love all the dogs I have had at any time. They are so much a part of my life and always will be.

The Velveteen Ocelot

(115,280 posts)
7. I'm so sorry! That decision is so, so hard.
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 09:04 PM
Jun 2020

Is it too soon or not soon enough? But sadly there's no way to avoid it eventually, and it's the last loving gift you can give him. I'm sure he had a great life with you.

A week ago today I had to do the same for my 17-year-old cat, and a month before that it was my 14-year-old cat. If you have animal friends it's what you do and it's a terrible burden but we take it on because they are worth it. "We who choose to surround ourselves with lives even more temporary than our own, live within a fragile circle; easily and often breached. Unable to accept its awful gaps, we would still live no other way. We cherish memory as the only certain immortality, never fully understanding the necessary plan." (Irving Townsend)

milestogo

(16,829 posts)
43. I'm sorry for your losses.
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 12:35 PM
Jun 2020

I'm glad I took him home so he was with me when he passed. But I really didn't understand how close to death he was.

Freedomofspeech

(4,218 posts)
10. We have had to do this too many times...
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 09:08 PM
Jun 2020

But how blessed are we to give them the love and peace they deserve? Take care and know you are doing the best for your beloved dog.❤

ms liberty

(8,479 posts)
13. I'm so sorry. We had to put our 14 year old cat to sleep last week
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 09:26 PM
Jun 2020

After he suddenly began acting sick. The vet found he had a cancerous tumor in his lungs, as well as a bad infection. I know how you feel, it does not ever get easier.

livetohike

(22,084 posts)
14. I'm so sorry milestogo. You both fought hard. Hugs for you and your
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 09:28 PM
Jun 2020

sweet dog. Holding you both in my thoughts .

bottomofthehill

(8,261 posts)
15. I am so sorry for you
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 09:32 PM
Jun 2020

We went through this with our family dog, we did everything we could to keep her comfortable, but her seizures were getting so bad she bit through her tuong. Than is when we knew it was time to let her go. We were at the point that she was suffering for us. You Know what and when it is best for your baby. It is a terrible and difficult decision, and one that that will leave your sad for a while, but again, you do what is best for the suffering of your baby.

BigmanPigman

(51,432 posts)
17. My little 17 year old dog died on June 2
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 09:48 PM
Jun 2020

and I have been a wreck ever since. I knew I would be since I was after my first baby died in 2002. I hope you can deal with it better than I have been. She was better than an actual child and I miss her SOOOOOO much it physically hurts. Three weeks ago was our last day together. She went downhill relatively quickly (only 2-3 weeks). It had been the two of us so now my home is so very empty.
Now I am crying again/as usual.

milestogo

(16,829 posts)
53. I'm sorry
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 01:10 PM
Jun 2020

It was just me and my dog too. It feels strange just moving my home without him being here. I miss taking him out to pee.

BigmanPigman

(51,432 posts)
89. I would miss mine when she was gone only two hours
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 09:56 PM
Jun 2020

at the groomers. Now the apt is SO damn empty. It has been 3 weeks but the pain of my loss hasn't diminished one bit.

She stopped drinking water the day before I had made arrangements for her to die at home the next day. I think that she probably would have died sometime that day anyway (3 weeks ago today...I spent all day in bed...depressed). She lost control of her bladder, etc and I know people do that before they die. I am glad she was with me and at home and not in pain. That is the only thing I am glad about.

If you miss your baby like I miss mine, I feel terribly for you. This is Hell! No, this is worse than Hell, in my opinion. I hope you are doing better than I am.

milestogo

(16,829 posts)
90. My dog didn't eat all day Saturday, and I thought he was dying then.
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 10:12 PM
Jun 2020

Suddenly it occurred to me to take him to the emergency clinic, which is also where he's been treated. They put him on IVs and started trying to figure out what was going on with him. Ultimately he was transferred to their other clinic, where the vet who is a "criticalist" did the right test (an ultrasound) and told me that his cancer had recurred. When I asked him if there was anything other to do than euthanize him he said no. He said it was ok to take him home and say goodbye. I asked if he could be the one to put my dog down when I came back, but since my dog died at home there was no need.

So I was right, when I thought he was dying. It probably wouldn't have happened that night, but I knew he was getting worse. The thing is, the internist who was supposed to be managing him suggested that he wasn't eating because he had lyme disease or leptospirosis... which is beyond ridiculous since he hasn't been cavorting in the woods for months.

I am angry and the internist for not looking out for him. Also because she has to know by now that he died, and she hasn't even sent me an email. I'm prepared to vent on her if I don't hear from her by tomorrow.

The dying process can take a couple hours or a couple of weeks, but losing interest in food and water is a very important sign. A doctor once told me that death is actually the brain shutting down various organ systems, one by one. I could really see it with my last dog - in a matter of about 5 minutes.

I feel a lot of things. I have a little bit of regret that I didn't euthanize him when I found out he had pancreatic cancer... but I went for the best care possible and hoped for the best. Well, he's gone now and he went through hell. So I am sorry for that.

BigmanPigman

(51,432 posts)
91. The vet who did come and put her to sleep
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 10:38 PM
Jun 2020

here at home must have notified the regular vet since she sent me a condolence card. That made me start crying all over again. I am very dehydrated these days.

My first dog died at home and her ghost came several times over the 10 days, it was comforting in a way and not scary. She also visited my friend who loved her a lot. My dad's ghost came the night he died, before I even knew about it (a year ago...out of the blue). I am still getting over that! I told my baby to do the same to let me know she is OK but NOTHING. That has me feeling sad. My neighbor's dog also came back after it died so it isn't uncommon.

LakeArenal

(28,729 posts)
18. What is his name?
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 10:11 PM
Jun 2020

Ask him to send my love to all the good boys ahead of him.

Please give him a kiss on the head from me.

Dog is L❤️VE.

Karadeniz

(22,283 posts)
19. You did everything right; there was no more you could do. And tomorrow morning, you'll again
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 10:12 PM
Jun 2020

Be doing the right thing. When my Maltese 's spleen ruptured and I had to make that call, it was horrible. He spent the first night of his life by my bed. He moved to Germany with us. The way he was treated all over Europe, included in tourists' home movies, the only dog allowed in Astoria beach outside athens, the only dog allowed inside ludwig's palace to enjoy a musical performance...he broke down barriers everywhere. Then we took him all over great Britain. Next, he moved to Honolulu with us. His last move was back to Texas where he'd been born. I found that the only thing that helped was to go through all our photos and chronicle his and our lives. Then I could see what a great life he'd had...I could appreciate all the time and experiences we'd shared instead of that final event.

I'm sorry you have to experience this loss...btw, animals survive death, too.

brer cat

(24,402 posts)
21. I'm very sorry.
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 11:01 PM
Jun 2020

He will go in peace and be without pain. Whatever comfort that gives you, you are doing the right thing for your beloved pet.

Kaiserguy

(740 posts)
23. Hold him tight and remember all of the love he gave you
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 11:12 PM
Jun 2020

I'm sure that he also is remembering all the love you gave him.

littlemissmartypants

(22,418 posts)
24. So sorry milestogo. I hope you can find comfort knowing that you have done everything
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 11:12 PM
Jun 2020

you could to show that you've loved him. I hope you find more comfort in the happy memories he leaves behind.

BobTheSubgenius

(11,535 posts)
28. I absolutely dread this day.
Mon Jun 22, 2020, 11:49 PM
Jun 2020

I'm so sorry you have this to face...but I'm happy you had 12 years with him.

Our dog was 12 in April. *sigh* That makes your sorrow even worse for me to imagine. Please focus on the good.

milestogo

(16,829 posts)
66. My last one lived to be almost 16, but he had lots of problems along the way.
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 02:40 PM
Jun 2020

This dog was industrial strength... until he wasn't.

He sure was a sweetheart.

niyad

(112,435 posts)
78. Believe me, Oliver knew.
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 05:06 PM
Jun 2020

Do not be surprised if you hear his bark, or his paws on the floor, or something similar. It will be a message of love to you from him.

flibbitygiblets

(7,220 posts)
30. Love and light to your and your companion. 😥❤
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 12:00 AM
Jun 2020

We're getting very close with our 13yo; she's barely eating and can't walk without assistance. we just have to remember what a good life they had with us, it's all we could do.

I wish you peace and comfort.

Ellipsis

(9,123 posts)
31. I'm sorry, having him home during the process will comfort him
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 12:02 AM
Jun 2020

I recently put my 16 plus year cat down that way, It was first for me to see the process and the vet left out of respect and came back after she passed.

The one thing I would say in preparation... she pulled the scent of his office off him. Her memory of the vet was never positive. She was a rescue and had a rough life.

Just something to think on.

I'm sorry again.

12 years is good run.

milestogo

(16,829 posts)
69. I had him home overnight and he died in my bed at dawn.
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 02:45 PM
Jun 2020

I knew he was dying for the last hour and there was nothing to be done but comfort him. My last dog died in my arms too. Better than at the vet, I think... but one can't always control these things.

Thank you.

niyad

(112,435 posts)
32. Lady of the Beasts, please take Your little one gently home in Your loving arms, and send
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 12:02 AM
Jun 2020

peace and comfort to his loved ones.


I am so very sorry. Having to say goodbye to our beloved companions, even though we know it is the loving thing to do, is just so damned hard.

niyad

(112,435 posts)
77. I saw your update, and am glad that he was in your arms to the last.
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 05:01 PM
Jun 2020

It is so very hard, but when it happens this way, they know that they are safe and loved.

Know that we are all grieving with you, and are here for you.

niyad

(112,435 posts)
80. It is my prayer as we say goodbye to our beloved companions.
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 05:11 PM
Jun 2020

And I love your sig. Feels very reassuring.

Behind the Aegis

(53,833 posts)
75. I saw your update.
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 02:59 PM
Jun 2020


The same happened to us with our cat, Tony. He was scheduled to go in on a Monday, but died at home, with us, on Sunday. My husband, I and our four chihuahuas all by his side.

Again, my deepest condolences. I know how hard this is and how pained and sad you must be now. While it may not be much, or any comfort, I am sure there are many of us who are grieving with you.

Take care of yourself.

phylny

(8,353 posts)
35. I am so sorry for the coming loss of your beloved dog.
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 06:43 AM
Jun 2020

You gave him the best life. My husband will remind me, when we have to go through this, that our dogs live a better life than many humans. I'm sure the same goes for yours. Hugs to you.

The Velveteen Ocelot

(115,280 posts)
36. Saw the update - again, I'm sorry.
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 10:23 AM
Jun 2020

I hope it comforts you a little that you were with him. I'm sure it made it easier for him.

milestogo

(16,829 posts)
74. I'm not sure how aware he was.
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 02:50 PM
Jun 2020

When we went to bed I reminded him of all the good times we had. I rested his head on my chest. Towards morning I don't know what he knew, but I held him until he passed.

Skittles

(152,966 posts)
79. ...
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 05:10 PM
Jun 2020

so very sorry, milestogo


Grieve not,

nor speak of me with tears,

but laugh and talk of me

as if I were beside you…

I loved you so –

‘twas Heaven here with you.


~Isla Paschal Richardson

Skittles

(152,966 posts)
86. I know the feeling
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 06:23 PM
Jun 2020


it's like they take a piece of our heart with them

time doesn't heal all wounds but it makes them easier to bear, be good to yourself

Phentex

(16,330 posts)
81. I'm so sorry...
Tue Jun 23, 2020, 05:31 PM
Jun 2020

many of us have been there. Many of us will be there again. It's never easy. You did your best and I'm sure he knew it.

My heart goes out to you!

Rhiannon12866

(203,030 posts)
92. Oh no, I am so very sorry!
Thu Jun 25, 2020, 02:29 AM
Jun 2020

And, like so many here, I have been there, as well - and it never gets any easier. The best that I can offer is my sympathy and to remind you of the love and care that you gave to Oliver and how fortunate he was to have had you...

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