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Amimnoch

(4,558 posts)
Thu Apr 19, 2018, 08:20 PM Apr 2018

Need immediate help. How the hell do we get buried together??

Living in Houston, TX. A fairly blue spot in the middle of a sea of red.

I’m helping a very good friend arrange services for his husband (legally married) who passed away on Tuesday after a long fight with cancer.

We can now live together without ridiculous sodomy laws giving LE rights to invade our homes.
We can now be married.
But we can’t be buried with our husbands/wives???

We have tried 5 different funeral homes in the area. 4x outright refused to recognize their relationship. 1 has allowed to perform services, but on the condition that my friend not be identified as a spouse or husband during any of the services. We have likewise found no place that will allow him to purchase a plot where they both may be interred together. Best we’ve found is allowing his husband to be cremated and he can take the ashes, or a couple of seperate single plots near each other.

We can’t seem to find anything at all online about overcoming this kind of discrimination.

Gaypages don’t have any providers listed that are friendly to us in the area, houstonlgbtchamber likewise doesn’t have anything of this nature.

Anyone here by any chance have experience in this area??

8 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
Need immediate help. How the hell do we get buried together?? (Original Post) Amimnoch Apr 2018 OP
What a shame RandomAccess Apr 2018 #1
No experience, but... teenagebambam Apr 2018 #2
THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!! Amimnoch Apr 2018 #4
Oh, that's great teenagebambam Apr 2018 #7
My husband and I (I'm a woman) decided we will both be cremated. blueinredohio Apr 2018 #3
Buy two single plots, side by side left-of-center2012 Apr 2018 #5
If you want to burn their asses mercuryblues Apr 2018 #6
Buy a family plot and prepaid funerals. n/t Odoreida Apr 2018 #8
 

RandomAccess

(5,210 posts)
1. What a shame
Thu Apr 19, 2018, 08:33 PM
Apr 2018

Unfortunately, I can't help -- but I do send my condolences and sense of outrage that he has to go through this along with the death, the mourning, etc. after a long bout of illness. Shameful.

teenagebambam

(1,592 posts)
2. No experience, but...
Thu Apr 19, 2018, 08:34 PM
Apr 2018

...maybe investigate Episcopal Churches that have an on-site cemetery or columbarium?

 

Amimnoch

(4,558 posts)
4. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!
Thu Apr 19, 2018, 08:45 PM
Apr 2018

We’ve only been on the phone with them for a few minutes now, but in those few minutes we’ve made more progress than in the last 10 hours. St. Andrew’s Episcopal church is helping us now, and even has a regular cemetary called Glenwood that they work with that will have no problem accommodating my friends needs! We’d just assumed going a church route was going to be a non-starter for us, and hadn’t even considered trying to arrange services through one.

teenagebambam

(1,592 posts)
7. Oh, that's great
Fri Apr 20, 2018, 07:59 AM
Apr 2018

Hopefully everything works out. Please extend my sympathies to your friend for his loss.

blueinredohio

(6,797 posts)
3. My husband and I (I'm a woman) decided we will both be cremated.
Thu Apr 19, 2018, 08:38 PM
Apr 2018

Whoever goes first will keep the ashes, then when the other one goes the ashes will be mixed together and a tree planted over us. That may be a better way if no one will sell you plots by each other. I'm so sorry for your situation.

mercuryblues

(14,530 posts)
6. If you want to burn their asses
Fri Apr 20, 2018, 07:27 AM
Apr 2018

Have your friend and a woman go in and buy 2 cemetery plots, 1 for her and 1 for him. Then she can transfer the ownership of hers to him. It will take years for them to find out they've been had.

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