Why would a gay person frown on gay PDA's?

[closeupready]

In your opinion:

How would you make sense of a gay person who says he doesn't like seeing gay couples holding hands outside the gay ghetto?

[Drale]

1. Why would any gay person vote Republican?

Because Gay people can be just as stupid as everyone else thats why.

[closeupready]

3. True, or maybe not stupid, but

as BtA says, self-loathing.

[Behind the Aegis]

2. Two words come to mind...

"Self" and "loathing.

That is all.

[closeupready]

4. That's what I think.

Can I send you a PM?

[Behind the Aegis]

5. Of course you can.

[William769]

8. +1.

[mitchtv]

6. holding hands? no problem

I would say"get over it Mary"." Milking" each other in public is tasteless strait or gay. In that case its "get a room"

[closeupready]

7. Ditto.

Though I guess I'm a bit unfair, in that I enjoy seeing gay people make out like straight people feel entitled to do in the laundromat, at the grocery store, on the subway, etc.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

9. internalized homophobia. nt

[closeupready]

10. Yes, that disturbs me.

Particularly when it's someone you care for.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

11. it would disturb me too, unless they feel like they don't like ALL pda.

[closeupready]

12. I have a question that you can maybe answer about India.

Is it true that straight men in India hold hands publicly, sometimes?

And if so, can you explain to a non-Indian why that gets no opprobrium where the same people, living in the West, condemn it? (Obviously, I'm generalizing, but for purposes of the discussion.) And obviously, you may not precisely know why, it's just the way it is and that's all you know.

But if you can shed light, I would be grateful, as always.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

13. Is it true that straight men in India hold hands publicly, sometimes? yes

I think in india, it just means frienship where as people here know this to be homosexuality. also, i think there is a class issue, people of lower SES can hold hands but i have never seen the upper middle class (and consequently most westernized) people don't.

still if its a gay person against gays holding hands, i would say there is way too much internalized homophobia there

[closeupready]

15. Thanks. that is interesting to think about.

Very good food for thought. (BTW, I am planning a trip to South Asia at some point soon.)

Curious that it appears either education or the importation of Western values seems to lead to ... what's the word here ... selfishness? Introversion? Anti-social affect?

(I really love sociology, can you tell? lol)

[Pab Sungenis]

14. I don't like ANY PDA's personally.

Straight or gay.

[Rowdyboy]

17. Typically I don't care for PDA's-its just sort of tacky....but this one was okay in my book....so

I'm pretty much a hypocrite now aren't I...

[tjwmason]

18. I'm somewhat torn on the issue.

I would much prefer no PDAs - though wouldn't include holding hands in that.

However, given the extent to which straight couples are more than happy to eat each other's faces in public I do like it when gay couples feel that they have the same freedom; and certainly wouldn't expect gay couples to 'calm down' whilst not expecting the same of straights. My sense is that in London gay couples have become more willing to engage in PDAs recently, and in so far as this is a measure of them feeling safe in doing so, I am happy for them.

[closeupready]

19. Likewise, if heteros frown on gay PDA's, I have a right to frown

on hetero PDA's. Right?

[mitchtv]

20. most certainly you may look askance

On a recent trip to Argentina. after dark the public park benches became a haven for young lovers(I figured they mostly live at home and don't have cars like we do) Some of them got pretty vulgar for being out in public.I still kept thinking "eewwww'

[tjwmason]

23. Exactly.

[Creideiki]

21. IMHO, holding hands isn't PDA. Tonsil hockey...

that's PDA.

[Fearless]

22. Undoubtedly for the same reason...

A straight person would frown on PDA's from straight couples. I don't know what that reason is for any given individual, but I would assume it is the same general idea.

[stevenleser]

24. I see it a lot and it always makes me smile.

Of course I live in NYC, but I see a lot of same sex couples holding hands. And it always makes me happy to see that we are at least at the point here where they feel comfortable to do so.

[closeupready]

25. Ditto. I love seeing gay or lesbian couples doing

stuff together; has a way of really making my day. I don't mean having sex, I mean just being openly affectionate. In some areas, it takes boldness.

[Democrats_win]

28. Also, gay PDA is empowering to gays.

It's really neat to see gays kissing in public and it's evolved from only happening in the inner city to occuring in the 'burbs. I always try to look away, though, so as not to intrude on their private moment. Maybe that's part of why people don't like it, because they consider it "private." Nevertheless, kissing in public is like telling the world that life is good--gay or straight.

PDA away!

[Zorra]

26. Don't know. It's such great fun!

I love kissing and holding hands in public, and I get cheap thrills thinking about how I may be ruining some conservative bigot's day.

[JI7]

27. they are too worried about what anti gay people will think

"ohhh nooooo, they will think we are ............................"

[closeupready]

29. Probably in part, but who cares?

I live in a neighborhood that is mostly working-class heterosexual couples and families and heterosexual college-age young people, and you know what? The likelihood that I will EVER cross paths with them in my life is next to nil. That can hardly be my experience alone.

So I'm left to wonder, does it matter if a complete stranger hates you if you will never include them in your life in any way whatsoever?

My answer to that is 'no'. And if they condemn me for being gay, I can condemn them for some characteristic which they posses that I dislike. I try not to go there, but I can't be perfect 24/7.

editing to say, I meant 'who cares' rhetorically, not 'who cares what you think.'