Family of bullied girl to sue school district over suicide

[Judi Lynn]

Source: Associated Press


David Porter, Associated Press
Updated 11:20 pm, Tuesday, August 1, 2017





ROSELAND, N.J. (AP) — The family of a 12-year-old New Jersey girl who killed herself said Tuesday it will sue her school district for not stepping in to address the problem of cyberbullying.

An attorney for the family of Mallory Grossman said he will file a notice of intent to sue the Rockaway Township school district for negligence. The notice is a required precursor to the filing of a lawsuit.

Mallory took her own life in June after months of bullying by several of her classmates, in person and through social media, her mother, Dianne Grossman, said Tuesday.

Attorney Bruce Nagel said some of the messages were "vile and malicious."

Read more: http://www.chron.com/news/education/article/Family-of-bullied-teen-to-sue-school-district-11723526.php

[Docreed2003]

1. This should be spread far and wide for exposure...

My oldest daughter was a victim of bullying and cyber bullying in middle school. A young man began by tormenting her in school and then made a series of YouTube videos where he pretended to be our daughter while saying the most heinous stuff imaginable. It was devastating for her and we're still dealing with the repercussions to her self esteem. It finally took going to the cops, with the school code of conduct, and getting a restraining order and filing charges before the school woke up and got their act together. This was in one of "the best public schools" in the state that we lived in at the time. Unfortunately, I think this is an issue that is paid lip service but isn't fully appreciated and certainly not dealt with in a serious enough fashion.

[bucolic_frolic]

2. in loco parentis

a long-standing and well established responsibility of the school district and the state

[VWolf]

3. This scares the hell out of me

I have a 13 yo daughter, and, thankfully, she hasn't been cyberbullied. Yet.

I just hope that if something did happen, she would let me know before it escalated.

[Skittles]

4. I don't understand why it is so hard to address bullying

I grew up as a GI brat and the bullies were in every school - I got to where I could identify them my first week.....I gave them hell - well, it was easier for me, of course, since I never stayed anywhere very long

[RobinA]

6. Yeah, But

as a student you were inside the culture and the grown-ups are not. As a kid I realized and now even more as an adult I realize the amount of stuff that goes on that the powers that be have no idea of. This is anywhere, actually, not just school. And how does a school stop a dedicated bully? I sure don't know. It represents the worst of our herd animal behavior.

[Skittles]

12. teachers know who the bullies are

they know

bullies do not go to great lengths to hide their behavior

[RobinA]

17. I Know

the teachers know who SOME of the bullies are, but what can the school reasonably do to stop them? I'm asking honestly. I don't know what the solution is here. Bullying starts at home, not school. School is just one place bullies and non-bullies meet. There are many others. Plus, I think bullying can be rather subtle, especially as the kids get older. I was bullied for one brief period of time on a week long school trip in the summer. We were teenagers. I can pretty much guarantee the adults involved didn't know anything about it. I sure didn't tell them. The bullying happened well away from adult presence. I never blamed the chaperone. I blamed the person who started it and the people she sucked into her nasty little clique. Thankfully it was an isolated week and then we all went home.

[Skittles]

20. it's the children who need to be educated how to react to bullies

whether you're bullied and especially if you witness the bullying. What also needs to be taught is what constitutes inappropriate touching and the dangers of posting something online you might very much regret

[NCDem777]

22. And the thing about cyberbullying is

giving schools power to police what students say online is a bad BAD idea.

We already have cases of students being disciplined for saying things critical of schools, school personnel.

[Kaleva]

5. For months the parents forced that poor child to go to school to be emotionally tortured.

Despite her pleas to stay home and her complaints of headaches and stomach aches.

Now they, the parents, are looking to cash in.

[ProgressiveValue]

7. Exactly!

It isn't the school who should take care of the problem or the bullies who should be forced to change their behavior, it is the victim. Those parents should have just stopped sending her to school so they could be arrested for not taking her to school. And how great was it that the school ignored the bullying when it came to her drop in grades? Isn't that awesome?!?! When someone is getting bullied, they need to be victimized even more. Maybe we could start assuming all victims of bullying are going to either do a school shooting or kill themselves, then we could lock them up preemptively because of how they may respond to the poor bullies who are just doing their thing.

I like how you think!!!

[Kaleva]

10. Doing it the way you suggest, the child dies.

I would glady risk jail for protecting a child of mine from torture. I assume most parents would feel the same way. But maybe jail would have interfered with the girl's parent's social life or messed up weekend plans.

And I don't see anyone blaming the victim which is the girl. She's the only victim here.

[christx30]

8. Some schools are pro-bully.

They won't do anything to stop the bullying, but they'll punish the victim for fighting back. This leaves the victim with no options. if the school knew about the problem and did nothing about it, they are liable. If it was a gas leak and a kid died, same thing. It's a toxic environment. Kids have the right to go to school in a safe environment without being harassed.

[Kaleva]

9. The child was trapped between her parents and the school

The parents wouldn't heed her pleas to stay home and the school did little if anything. The child should have been kept home or transferred to another school until the bullying was stopped. The adults, including the girl's parents, failed her. Thus she felt the only way to escape the torment was to end her own life.

[christx30]

13. A lot of times parents can't just pick up and move,

or transfer the student to another school. I was relentlessly bullied in 5th grade, and the teacher, the principal, and the counselor wouldn't do a thing to help me. They met with my parents time and time again. So my parents couldn't exactly come to class with me. It was really up to the teachers to listen to me and do something, but they were useless. I wasn't allowed to transfer to another school. I can't remember the reasoning, because I'm 42. I hated it, and everyone in that class.
The next year we were able to move and I never looked back. In 8th grade, someone in gym tried to mess with me. I ended up breaking his arm, and he never spoke to me again. That was my year of peace.

[Kaleva]

14. When I was young, a child sometimes went to live with a relative.

I dont buy the excuse the parents couldn't have done nothing. This bullying had been going on for months and was having a very visable impact on the girl. And it wasnt just happening at scool. The girl was being attacked via social media outside of school. Why didn't the parents screen her messages or limit her access to a smart phone?

[LanternWaste]

15. Many people believe their knowledge of others so absolute

"I dont buy the excuse the parents couldn't have done nothing..."

Many people believe their knowledge of others so absolute that they are in a relevant position to pretend to know what the others should have done, what they themselves would have done, and ask rhetorical questions only the parents could answer.

Tedious and petulant finger pointing, without cause and which does nothing except allow the preening pointer to feel more clever than what reality may otherwise dictate. Which seems to be the actual raison d'être of knee-jerk blame.

[Kaleva]

16. I have a right to express an opinion

It is my hope the parents suffer greatly and never find peace. It is also my hope that the parents of the bullies face justice along with those in the school who were aware of what was going on.

[47of74]

11. I hope they take the school district to the fucking cleaners

Having been the victim of bullying I have no sympathy for the school district, and I hope they get taken to the fucking cleaners by the parents. That's the only way to get school districts to do a goddamn thing about bullying is to hurt them financially in a court of law.

[oneshooter]

18. My granddaughter was bullied in the 5th grade.

Our son had just been discharged from the Army at Ft.Hood. We moved him down here and got their daughter enrolled in school. She came home several times about 3 kids that were bullying her. Took the problem to the teacher, principle and the School District cops. The problem persisted, I even went to the school and videoed it happening. Still nothing was done. It got so bad that one of the bullies cut off a hunk of her hair while the other two held her down! Still nothing was done, the parent of the three boys, who had been held back a year, denied that they had done ANYTHING wrong. And had threatened the school with legal action if this "harassment" did not stop.
SO, My son and I taught her to defend herself. Simple throws, how to punch, where to strike and, most importantly.
when to stop. It all came to a head 5 weeks later, the boys decided that she needed another "hair cut" This time on the playground in front of others. According to the video tapes they approached her from behind and one of them grabbed her in a bear hug while the second tried to get her feet, She hit one in the nose 3 times with the back of her head, then did a simple throw. The second slapped her and she punched him in the solar plexus then kicked him in the knee. The third one, with the scissors then raised them above his head and she kicked him in the balls.
The School District expelled all for fighting. We went to court and got her reinstated as it was proved, with the video, that she was defending herself against 3-1 odds. The parent of the boys sued the district, and lost. Tried to sue my som, thrown out of court. My son is now suing the parent for cost of defense.

In my humble opinion, teach your kids to defend themselves, and just as important WHEN to defend themselves.

[Old Vet]

19. It sucks, But your right oneshooter...........

When I was in elementary school I was bullied terribly. At the time my family bought new clothes once a year and that was it, They may of got old but never dirty, Although many would ask and joke I didn't have any other clothes.(I didn't)I also had bright red hair and did have a step dad, I couldn't catch a break. To make a long story short, A military father saw me being bullied while with his son(my friend). That weekend he took me to stewart airport and I began karate lessons paid for by my friends parents. Even when my friend and his family were stationed somewhere else he was kind enough to pay a full year of lessons. I agreed to mop up every weekend in exchange for gees and supplies. I will never forget the fight that changed everything, that's what it took.

[oneshooter]

21. " I couldn't catch a break "

Are you left handed? If not then maybe you did catch a break, albeit a small one.