This 4-Year-Old Boy Isnt Allowed At School Because Of His Long Hair

[RKP5637]

His hair is a little long, but if you read the dress code it reads like a 1950's dress code, FFS!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/this-4-year-old-boy-isnt-allowed-at-school-because-of-his-long-hair_us_599c790ae4b06a788a2c718f?section=us_queer-voices&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=__Queer%20Voices__082417&utm_content=__Queer%20Voices__082417+Version+A+CID_0be75ef11131be9510fb5a35a81a8fe4&utm_source=Email%20marketing%20software&utm_term=4%20Year%20Old%20Haircut&ncid=newsltushpmgvoices__Queer%20Voices__082417

When Oates brought Jabez to school on Monday, she attempted to meet the dress code requirements by pulling his hair back into a bun with a black hair tie, but he wasn’t allowed out of the car. She met with the principal and the assistant superintendent, and was told Jabez’s hair was still in violation of dress code. On Tuesday, she had to call in sick to her job because Jabez couldn’t go to school. Still, she won’t consider a haircut.

“I will cut his hair the day he asks me to get his hair cut,” she told HuffPost.

The school has a policy for boys that hair must not extend below the collar, the ear lobes or the eyebrow. A copy of the dress code policy for grades pre-K through 5 states, “The district’s dress code is established to set the standard of excellence, set our students apart from others, teach grooming/hygiene, prevent disruption, and minimize safety hazards.”

[BumRushDaShow]

1. Here is the pic

?

[DetlefK]

29. Pull the hair into a ponytail or bun and he's fine.

[obamanut2012]

42. Nope, not as per the school

She tried that and in a "man bun," and both are nopes.

[Hortensis]

138. This is a public school district in Texas, also.

Very likely with a conservative board of directors. Conventionalism is pretty strong among conservatives in general. This district will be getting state and likely federal taxpayer dollars, though, a big consideration if they fight this.

[Ken Burch]

146. So, it's another example of the "liberty means the right to be petty tyrants" thing.

n/t.

[delisen]

161. Look out kid, it's somethin' you did. God know when but you're doing it again.

[Petrushka]

207. Samson as a youngster? (n/t)

[Turbineguy]

2. "Howz about

we put a little black mustache on him?"

Or better yet: "he's like this guy:"

http://badassoftheweek.com/index.cgi?id=579429818534

[RKP5637]

8. Wow!!! n/t

[fleabiscuit]

80. Excellent.

[pansypoo53219]

139. now. how in the hell do i know that dutch dude's name? must have been in

some entry in my 1891 encyclopedia britannica. i can't wait to get to R now.

[bdtrppr6]

201. FUCKIN A

Adventure is Thy Name! thanks for sharing my new favorite website.

and that kid needs to grow it some more! i've always had long hair, really long occasionally, and always had comments about it.

fuck you, it's long, deal with it, motherfucker. who are you to comment?

[JimGinPA]

3. Dangerous Looking Individual...

Definitely deserves to be stigmatized!


(for the humor-impaired)

[5X]

4. all the way through school for me, first grade through senior

in high school, our hair had to be above the collar, off the ears all together.
could be why my hair now is past my waist.

[Glamrock]

15. Hahahaha

Same here! Well it's not to my waist, but it's well past me collar.

[RKP5637]

16. I've always thought of it as an authoritative thing. This school might be an indoctrination center

for molding young republicans. Some of my friends, when we moved into management, started getting razor cut haircuts, close to the scalp, but long enough for a comb over. I always had well kept stylish long hair. None cared, but one of the senior managers once asked me if I combed my hair with a brick in the morning. We all laughed, was no big deal.

[Drunken Irishman]

208. Of course it is. Same with school uniforms.

Luckily, I missed the boat on all of this. I remember kids in my elementary who had long hair and we didn't have to wear uniforms. The class after I left 6th grade, did, though.

[RKP5637]

210. Fortunately, none of our schools got into the uniform bit. n/t

[R0ckyRac00n]

5. Well...

What else would you expect from a place called Barber's Hill.

[RKP5637]

9. ...

[Demonaut]

6. cut his hair

[Ken Burch]

111. So she should just give in and make the kid lose himself?

Their relationship would never recover.

The kid would never be able to be free as an adult.

There's no good reason for a four-year-olds to have to look like Army recruits.

[Drahthaardogs]

116. If getting your hair cut would traumatize him that much

How is he going to function in life. Don't sweat the small stuff

[Ken Burch]

117. At age four, being forced to conform in such a harsh way

can leave lasting scars.

The school is out of line and the Fifties are over.

[Drahthaardogs]

126. Oh nonsense. Show me a peer reviewed journal with a p value

That substantiates such a claim.

[WinkyDink]

130. This is satire, right? Because a mother's taking her kid for a haircut IS NOT "HARSH."

[Warpy]

176. It is in some cultures

Check out the stories of kids who went to Indian schools in this country. First thing they did is chop their hair off.

[WhiskeyGrinder]

120. Four-year-olds can be tender. There's a difference between respecting emerging autonomy and

coddling, and there's still plenty of time for lessons about rules.

[Drahthaardogs]

127. You don't think claiming he would never get over having his

Hair cut and would ruin his relationship with his mother forever and never completely develop himself over a haircut a little fucking dramatic?

[WhiskeyGrinder]

134. I do think that how we treat children in this country is generally not the greatest, as evidenced

by the people who advocate with tough or dismissive talk cutting the kid's hair.

[moda253]

214. Why should they be forced to cut his hair?

Who gives a fuck why the kid and the parents don't want to cut his hair?

[Drahthaardogs]

219. That's not the point I spoke to. I spoke to the drama that it

Would wound him to his dying day. You can't expect an argument to be taken seriously when outrageous claims are made.

Personally, I don't see the big deal with his hair BUT if he had to cut it, I seriously fucking doubt his psyche is now ruined for life. That shit is why we are mocked. It's ridiculous.

[WinkyDink]

131. Well, let's hope nobody tells him about Santa or the Tooth Fairy. The shock to his system!

[WhiskeyGrinder]

136. Giving children the space they need to negotiate change actually makes them more resilient and

ready for change down the road. Showing a child that people respect his reasonable wishes teaches him he is worth listening to and gives him confidence. It's possible to do so without raising a tyrant. But I know some mean uncles like to tell kids they shot the Easter bunny and laugh at their tears, so mileage certainly varies.

[WinkyDink]

129. He's 4; he isn't going to "lose himself."

[Ken Burch]

132. Why should we ever give in to petty, pointless rules like this, though?

There's no greater good served from obedience for the sake of obedience.

Hard to imagine the kid would ever trust his mother again after this if she did obey the school.

Or that he could still be a free, poetic, spontaneous child with a military haircut.

The point of imposing conformity in grooming is to erase the individual and dull the soul. It can't ever shape anyone into being a whole, beautiful human being.

[gtar100]

143. I'm with you, Ken Burch.

It may be easy for others to see it as no big deal for him to get a haircut (and be *taught a lesson*) but I can relate to this as one who has made the choice to conform (or was made to under threats of punishment). It doesn't sit well and has gnawed away at me my whole life.

Hope this kid finds his rightful place without others throwing up their bullshit, useless rules coming from their own biases simply because they have a problem with something that really isn't a problem.

Choosing to conform with a group over individuality should not be taken lightly and without good reason. I think there are times and places when it's appropriate to conform to a group but this is not one of them. I'm not seeing the need for him to cut his hair except to appease the narrow minds of authoritarians who require external confirmation of their own prejudices and have a difficult time dealing with the nuances of individuals.

Integrity of character should matter over conformity.

[Demonaut]

173. is this sarcasm because I'm never sure onymore on DU

[Angry Dragon]

142. girls too .......... treat every one the same

[Demonaut]

174. yes..comrade

[Angry Dragon]

178. discrimination based on sex

[Demonaut]

179. is it?

[Angry Dragon]

180. yes

[WhiskeyGrinder]

181. Under Title IX, yes.

[Angry Dragon]

185. THANK YOU

[USALiberal]

216. FFS really? Why? If girls can have it why can't he? n/t

[oberliner]

7. Parent refuses to comply with school dress code

Would be another potential headline for this story.

[Blue_Adept]

12. Same could be said of the young black women kept from school because of their hair

Some policies are definitely outdated and counterproductive

http://www.npr.org/sections/ed/2017/07/17/534448313/when-black-hair-violates-the-dress-code

http://www.newsweek.com/malden-ma-dress-code-charter-school-policy-613691

[oberliner]

18. Agreed

Each situation can be looked at from different perspectives.

It is worth reflecting on whether or not schools ought to have dress codes. If so, are there nationally agreed upon standards for what these codes ought to include or does it make sense from them to vary based on the input of local residents?

Or are school dress codes of any kind inherently discriminatory?

[RKP5637]

25. I think they are often inherently discriminatory. I have no difficulty with logical and sensible

dress codes with great flexibility, but often in my experience they are used for discrimination and authoritarianism.

[Doodley]

94. Very good points. Maybe there should be research to see if the dress codes

deliberately discriminate.

[RKP5637]

19. Absolutely incredible! Horrific! Just another way to harasses black people. And, that was in the

Boston area, I can just imagine what it's like in other parts of this country.

[bluepen]

24. Not really surprising where that happened.

Boston has racial issues. Interesting data here:

https://www.bostonglobe.com/metro/2017/06/22/boston-racist-poll-shows-city-split-along-racial-lines/WRM3reSgkfpYtheDoCyxTM/story.html

Race has been a long-vexing problem for Boston, from the 1950s Red Sox’ insistence on becoming the last major-league team to sign a black player (the Globe’s publisher, John Henry, bought the team in 2002), to the busing uproar of the 1970s and the police department’s handling of the 1989 Charles Stuart case.

More recently, racism burst into the civic dialogue again this spring when a Baltimore Orioles player who is black said fans hurled racial epithets at him and a “Saturday Night Live” comedian labeled Boston the country’s most racist city. Those incidents launched a municipal — and sometimes national — conversation on how the city deals with race.

[RKP5637]

27. Thanks for the link!

[Doodley]

93. Disagree. Braided hair extensions do not define black children.

[Doodley]

91. Braided hair extensions do not define black heritage or a black child.

[csziggy]

163. Or the Navajo kindergartners sent home because of long hair

Navajo Kindergartner Sent Home from School, Ordered to Cut His Hair
Simon Moya-Smith • August 28, 2014

On Monday, a 5-year-old Native American boy was sent home on his first day of school and ordered to cut his hair short because it allegedly violated district policy, the boy’s mother said.

The child, Malachi Wilson, an enrolled citizen of the Navajo Nation, had been looking forward to his first day of kindergarten at F.J. Young Elementary in Seminole, Texas.

“After we had enrolled him he was excited. He was ready to go. Everyday it was—the question, ‘Mom, {am I} going to school?’” his mother, April Wilson, told CBS-affiliate Channel 7.

But that notable day in a child’s life would not happen for Malachi. He was turned away by school officials and sent home.
More: https://indiancountrymedianetwork.com/education/native-education/navajo-kindergartner-sent-home-from-school-ordered-to-cut-his-hair/

Or this child:

A Native American Family Fights Against Hair Length Rules
Wednesday, July 9, 2008 at 4 a.m.
By Paul Knight

<SNIP>

His father, Kenney Arocha, is part Native American. He teaches spiritual beliefs to his son that his grandfather and uncles taught to him. Michelle Betenbaugh, Arocha's wife and Adriel's mother, isn't Native American, but she supports raising her son as such.

<SNIP>

Adriel's parents want to enroll him at Needville Elementary School. Betenbaugh sent an e-mail to the principal, asking about kindergarten and explaining Adriel's long hair. The principal replied that the district doesn't allow long hair on boys.

On June 9, the family met with Curtis Rhodes, the Needville superintendent. Rhodes asked what religion upheld that Adriel could not cut his hair. The family explained there wasn't a church or doctrine they followed, but they believe that Adriel's hair is sacred.

Arocha said that his belief is to cut his hair after life-changing events, such as mourning the death of someone he loves.
More: http://www.houstonpress.com/news/a-native-american-family-fights-against-hair-length-rules-6575891

Even when it was presented as a religious belief and eve when the school district was provided documentation of prior court cases in favor of allowing long hair on boys for religious reasons particularly Native Americans, the school district refused to cooperate. The family in this case fought it in the courts and won: http://caselaw.findlaw.com/us-5th-circuit/1531060.html

[obamanut2012]

44. Nope, "Dress Code Gender Discrimination"

Which is what it is.

[oberliner]

60. That part isn't news

The dress code has been in place for a while there.

[kcr]

64. Interesting definition of news you got there.

So, no need to ever report on anything discriminatory, since that's not news. After all, that's been going on forever.

[oberliner]

83. The newsworthy nature of this story is the dispute over the student, isn't it?

That's all I am saying.

Restrictions on hair length are found in dress codes at many schools, I would imagine. There definitely could be an op-ed talking about how such a policy is discriminatory.

Dress code stories, though, tend to make the news when they are challenged by students or parents, as in this case.

[kcr]

115. Going by this thread, I think for some people it is news.

It's easy to forget how large and regionally diverse this country is. It might as well be a different country depending on where you live. For those who have only ever lived in one region, or haven't moved in a long time, they might not realize just how completely different it is elsewhere, and they have no idea these dress codes still exist. They figure they're a relic of the past everywhere. The same thing happens when paddling in schools comes up. There are still a lot of people who don't realize the red states STILL do that. It's news to them.

[Angry Dragon]

182. so true

[oasis]

10. "minimize safety hazards"?

I guess girls with long hair are less of a safety hazard.

[RKP5637]

13. I've never understood this hair thing. Back aways it was fully acceptable for men/boys to have

extremely long hair, prudent in government, and also for kings, warriors, etc., etc. I never would have met their admission standards my entire life. It seems to me to be an authoritative thing.

[oasis]

23. yup, a control thing. nt

[bdamomma]

11. the parent refuses to do it

until the boy gives his permission to have his hair cut???? what is wrong with that picture, usually it is the parent who has control over their kids, weird.

[WhiskeyGrinder]

21. Many parents look for ways to give kids autonomy over their own bodies.

[Doodley]

92. Thank you for making that point when many side with a 4-year old being the boss

[romanic]

177. For real!

Some people here got it backwards.

[moda253]

215. So for sake of argument....

What if the child hasn't identified himself gender wise yet. He's still pretty young but something is telling him that he likes his hair long for some reason. Now I have no idea if this is the case or not but if the kid is that adamant about his hair you don't go forcing him to cut his hair. Why would you? To meet some predefined societal rule that one must do this? That's absurd. There is really no good reason to say that this boy has to cut his hair. Not unless you are going to force girls to cut their hair too.

I'm actually pretty damned shocked to be reading some of these absurd opinions on DU today.

[TexasBushwhacker]

14. My brothers and I were in grade school '65 thru '80

Long hair was allowed, even facial hair. I often went braless. We still learned and graduated!

[RKP5637]

20. Exactly!!! Well said!!! To me this is often about allowing authoritative types to get their kicks.

IMO the educational system is often full of authoritative types.

[TexasBushwhacker]

34. Yes. Full of authorotative types

Who like to make life hell for caring nuturing type teachers like me. I lasted 9 years.

[Doodley]

95. I agree, but we all have to follow rules, whether we like them or not.

I think a four-year-old kid should not be empowered by the parents to change policy by that perhaps other kids and parents respect.

[RKP5637]

100. It seems that's the way they want it there. I would enroll my child in a different school. He well

might not like that school for a variety of reasons. It might be an uphill battle all the way.

[WhiskeyGrinder]

17. Making hair part of the dress code is ridiculous, especially for grade-school kids.

And good for the parent to listen to Jabez's preference.

[RKP5637]

22. Agree!!!!! n/t

[eppur_se_muova]

61. Absolutely ! Growing your hair out is not "getting dressed" -- it does that naturally.

If he likes it that way, who's it hurting ?

[JenniferJuniper]

26. Someone please explain to me what

the difference is between a girl with long hair and a boy with long hair?

I think boys in particular should be allowed long hair if they want it because they are much more likely than girls to lose it in mid-life. Work it while you got it, boy!

[RKP5637]

30. I agree, no difference. This hair thing is absurd. In my youth I developed tinnitus in high school.

The dr. told me it was because I had long hair and probably some of the hairs got into my ears. I guess I looked at him like WTF, are you really stupid or what. ... because then he said, well, that really doesn't make sense, does it ... and I said no!

[Doodley]

96. Are we going to say schools that have a dress code should not

accept that there is a difference between boys and girls?

[RKP5637]

108. We're saying a dress code for hair length seems pretty antiquated and authoritarian. n/t

[WhiskeyGrinder]

114. We're saying a dress code should follow the law, and requiring different haircuts for boys and girls

is against the law.

[Lordquinton]

144. Are you saying they should enforce it?

Sexist rules are sexist regardless of age. Rules that violate bodily autonomy are bad regardless of age or location.

[Ken Burch]

188. Uh...trans and gender-fluid DUers may be here to have a word with you in a minute

That said...is there no way to note gender differences without insisting they be expressed through hair length?

Would you say a 4 year old girl who liked her hair short should be obligated to grow it out?

[obamanut2012]

45. None

Just like how some schools allow boys to wear muscle shirts/tank tops or shorts, and girls can't.

It is literally illegal gender discrimination.

[MineralMan]

28. No doubt girls at that school are allowed to have hair that length.

So, this is discrimination on the basis of sex. Any decent attorney could settle this school's hash in about ten minutes with a well-worded letter.

Stuff like this is bullshit, plain and simple. It's not the school's place to dictate how kids wear their hair according to what sex the kid is.

[RKP5637]

33. Exactly!!! Pure bullshit! I get so tired of this type of crap. n/t

[smirkymonkey]

41. I agree. Besides, I think he looks cute.

He should wear his hair the way he wants. There is no valid reason for forcing him to cut it.

[MineralMan]

47. Exactly.

The kid's 5 years old. Leave him alone. Soon enough, peer pressure will start coming into play. Let him enjoy being 5 years old.

That anyone cares about this is just silly.

[HAB911]

31. True story

In 1972 I left the Army after a three year tour, one on the DMZ in Korea. I returned to my pre-Army life with a telecommunications central office manufacturing company, installing and testing equipment around the country. I was working in a small town in South Carolina for almost 6 months, and having just left the Army, had let my hair grow. My company did not have a dress code pertaining to hair, but the local telephone company did. Moustache could not extend beyond the corner of the mouth, hair could not touch the ear or collar, standard military code. My hair was starting to be out of compliance by this time. They told me I could not enter the building, which had a camera on the door with electronic lock, and if they didn’t like your looks, you were locked out. If locked out, I would lose my job, so I bought a short hair wig. Of course, all this did was piss them off.

Eventually, a strand of hair would fall out from under the wig and when it did they reported it to my boss and threats ensued. Having been a member of the ACLU since before I can remember, I wrote a letter to the state ACLU detailing my problem. They sent me a letter describing my legal position, and stating that about the only option was a civil rights suit. I gave the letter to the telephone company, and within a week, my boss and his boss flew into town and offered me my job in any state of my choosing. I chose Florida and finished my 45 year career with one fine company, IMO.

I learned later, that company was at the time under federal scrutiny for other civil rights violations for discriminatory hiring practices regarding African-Americans.


RESIST

[RKP5637]

35. OMG! And there are probably others similar to yours that go unheard, The sheer nonsense is

unbelievable.

[HAB911]

40. For sure

LOL, from my old age vantage I can't believe the balls I had

too funny, now

[MineralMan]

51. For a while, I worked at a gas station after getting out of

the USAF in 1969. I had stopped shaving and had a full beard, which I still have. The guy who owned the station said I couldn't have a beard if I worked for him. I said, "How about sideburns?" He said that was OK, so I shaved a 1" wide strip on my chin. It looked ridiculous. I was a good worker, though. One day, he told me to go ahead and grow that patch out. Then, he made me the manager of his station.

Sometimes, people figure out that their rules are just stupid.

[HAB911]

57. LOL! Very true. Another true story......

A common thread in my life.........

After Korea I was stationed at Ft. Benning. The company commander was Catholic. He regularly assigned details of Army road grading equipment on weekends to clear land for the Catholic church in Alabama. I was in communications, but as a non-comm I was assigned to supervise the crews on several weekends. Beyond my personal religious beliefs, I didn't take kindly to losing my weekends for his church, and let it be known. Needless to say, that put me on his shit list and he started riding my ass. I could never have hair short enough for him. I essentially had a buzz cut, but what I did was use Brylcreem to make it lie flat, then I parted it down the middle, which has stuck with me to this day. (not the Brylcreem, the part). It was all counter productive for me, as he would at every opportunity assign me extra duty which meant supervising lower rank guys doing extra duty.

good times!

[MineralMan]

59. Oh, there were always ways to strike back while in the military.

As long as you didn't mind being on someone's shit list, it could be entertaining, at a minimum.

My favorite was blocking 100% participation on my unit's United Way donations. I remember a long discussion with a Colonel over that one. I walked it right up the chain of command. It ended when I mentioned the Inspector General's office to the Colonel. Voluntary contributions are voluntary, after all, and that was documented in official orders. He was not amused, but the harassment ended once and for all.

At the time, the USAF was paying me $256 per month as an E-4. Half of that was going into a savings account, and I needed the rest for beer and snacks. There was nothing left for the United Way. Besides, I only donate to individual charities, even now, after making sure they deserve that donation.

[HAB911]

65. Oh boy

I went through that exercise too and again at work years later, voluntary means voluntary.

[Angry Dragon]

189. sounds like the commander should have been brought up on charges

stealing from the army

[HAB911]

211. No, as I remember it

that's called community outreach

[Doodley]

32. So, the wishes of a four-year old take precedent over the school?

I call this child abuse by the mother who thinks he can do what he likes and not follow rules.

[MineralMan]

37. Child abuse? Really?

Rules that are stupid need to be changed. Moms who don't care if their kids want long hair? They're fine. Who cares how long the kid's hair is. That has nothing to do with anything.

The school is wrong. The rules are wrong. If there are any girls at that school with long hair, the school will lose. Simple.

Sexual discrimination is illegal.

[Doodley]

87. Abdicating parental responsibility by letting a small child do as he wants

and then blaming the rules is child abuse.

I was in a restaurant a few years ago in which small children were screaming and had turned the floor around the table into play den filled with ripped up paper, pens, menus and everything else. Nobody did a thing and the parents just sat at the table without a care in the world. I walked over to the table. "This is child abuse," I said. "failing to give your children any barriers whatsoever." Other customers stood up and clapped their hands at me.

This is what we are doing to this country, turning it into a namby pamby state in which kids don't have to follow any rules, everyone else is to blame and people are too afraid to say anything. And the political correctness that you speak of that girls can have long hair so there is no problem is one reason we have a bigoted idiot in the White House.

[WhiskeyGrinder]

102. Cool story, bro.

And yeah, letting a child's hair grow long is just like letting them run around in a restaurant. Get a hold of yourself.

[Warren DeMontague]

151. It's threads like these where DU really shows its age.

Oh God, the "a baby in TGIFs ruined my fine dining experience" threads... a spectacle not to be believed.

[WhiskeyGrinder]

153. I thought the other diners applauding was a nice touch.

[Warren DeMontague]

155. isn't that how it always works out?

like that time everyone in the checkout aisle cheered me when I told off the welfare queen buying vodka and bon-bons with her food stamps.

[WhiskeyGrinder]

158. Nothing like being in the right place at the right time!

[Major Nikon]

172. Gotta love a happy ending

[WhiskeyGrinder]

183. Hee!

Well said!

[Doodley]

162. I have no problem with a kid having long hair.

[Warren DeMontague]

149. Cool story, bro!

[Angry Dragon]

190. ..............

[obamanut2012]

48. lulz

[kcr]

66. Just like it was child abuse for girls to want to wear pants!

Time go go to the good old days, right?

[Doodley]

88. Please don't make excuses for a 4 year old calling the shots. Look what we have in the White House

[kcr]

110. Long hair is the reason Trump's in office?

Well, now that I think about it, I have seen Melania wearing pants. Who knew that we had the demographics so wrong?

[Major Nikon]

187. Most people consider it a civic duty to stand up against chickenshits

YMMV

[Angry Dragon]

191. We have a 2 year old in the White House

[Voltaire2]

77. Arbitrary bullshit is bullshit.

[delisen]

133. She is teaching him to be a Democrat and the importance of not

following an unjust rule so that he may grow up to be a protector of freedom rather than a follower of Putin or Trump.

She is also teaching him that his body is for him to control, not others.

[OnDoutside]

36. Head lice in schools is one reason for these rules, it's hard

Enough to get kids into the shower or bath as it is !

One other thing I've noticed is how many kids of bald or balding male parents, are allowed grow their hair extra long.

[MineralMan]

39. Girls in that school have long hair, I have no doubt.

It's not lice. It's weirdness on the part of school officials. They should not care. That they do is suspect.

[RKP5637]

43. That, is a valid point. I remember in our school system they used to check for head lice about

one or two times a year, it was no big deal to us. This is true. I remember once the dr. found a bug colony in one girls hair. She had one of the tall beehive styles popular in the 50's and somehow a bug had climbed in a made a nest. She was clean and all that, but just one of those things that sometimes happen. We all giggled, but were glad he found it for her.

[obamanut2012]

49. Except girls can have long hair, so nope

[jberryhill]

54. Girls magically repel lice?

That's amazing. I did not know girls had this power.

[Voltaire2]

78. Yes they have magic cooties.

Lice die. Boys are repelled. Policy makes perfect sense now

[jberryhill]

79. And I thought all that stuff was just made up!

[Nevernose]

171. I had to shave my daughter's head bald in 1st grade

I had a clean house and a clean child, but lice don't care about that. What they DO care about is hair that is, weirdly and insidiously, the exact same color as nits.

After maybe the tenth reoccurrence I took her in the backyard and shaved her head. She said "Daddy? Why didn't you shave your head?" So of course I shaved my head on the spot and have kept it shaved ever since (and I could have hair if I wanted!).

Now that she's an adult, she keeps short hair. Turns out it looks better on her, and she figured that out from looking at old pictures hanging in the hallway.

[Angry Dragon]

193. Now that is love

[phylny]

212. Lice prefer clean hair, and they do not care for kinky hair, so

we also had a double-whammy. Two kids with very blond hair, yes, same color as the nits.

Nit picking. It's a real thing.

[Ilsa]

123. Girls usually are the lice carriers because of their hair.

Been there, done that, as a school nurse for elementary schools.

If boys get lice, they usually get a cut short enough to make nit removal easier.

My guess is that the school has these rules for other reasons, though.

[Doreen]

202. So, long haired boys get lice easier than long haired girls?

[NoChildSupport]

38. It's pretty simple

You can't follow the rules, you are not allowed in

http://www.bhisd.net/uploaded/parents/Dress_and_Personal_Appearance_PK-5_Grades_Rev_9-2-2014.pdf

[obamanut2012]

50. Nope, not when the rules are illegal gender discrimination

Which this is. Which almost all dress codes are.

So, wrong.

[vi5]

63. Hasn't this been sorted out in courts?

If it's a private school then it's their rules.

Same way that Bob Jones or LIberty U can have horribly regressive and sexist rules and dress codes.

Same way Country Clubs can still not allow women.

It's stupid, but if it's private then they can do it.

http://www.riaclu.org/know-your-rights/pamphlets/know-your-rights-school-dress-codes


Per the ACLU, laws do not apply in the private school setting.

[kcr]

74. Schools in red states have been pushing the envelope and getting away with it for so long

The egregious shit they've been getting away with is so bad that many in this thread are assuming the school in the OP is a private school. Having lived in a hell-hole state until recently, I knew better. I got my family out and my kids are thriving.

[Doodley]

98. Has political correctness gone so far that every boy should have an automatic right to

go to school with hair down to his chest?

[WhiskeyGrinder]

104. They DO have that right, actually, unless the rules require neck-short hair for both boys and girls.

That's what Title IX is all about. It has nothing to do with political correctness; it's the law.

[MrsCoffee]

105. Why not?

What harm is it doing? What are the differences that you are speaking of upthread that we should be made aware of through a dress code?

What makes it bad for a boy to have long hair but ok for a girl?

[Lordquinton]

145. And girls can wear pants

What is the world coming to!!!!

[Angry Dragon]

194. yes

[Hell Hath No Fury]

196. Dood -

Are you sure you're on the right website?

As long as it's clean and well-kept, who cares how long his hair is? Hair length is an arbitrary and out-dated gender rule.

[Proud Liberal Dem]

46. More senseless stupid gender policing

I get why schools have some basic dress codes but I don't get why they also get to prescribe hair length depending on gender? The school is wasting this young child's ability to get an education and his parent's ability to earn a living. This silliness needs to stop. His long hair isn't going to hurt anybody.

[RKP5637]

53. I completely agree! n/t

[BannonsLiver]

52. These things tend to sort themselves out

If his hair is different than that of his male classmates he will likely be ostracized by them, which will in turn motivate him to get his hair cut. Viola! Problem solved.

[RKP5637]

55. I've been thinking that too, and also possibly he might decide this is not a school he wants to

attend and people he wants to be around. I think when I read the article there were other schools he could attend.

[JenniferJuniper]

56. Or he'll be a trendsetter

and long hair will be all the rage for boys at the school.

And it's only a "problem" because the school is run by gender discriminating idiots.

[lunasun]

70. But he is not allowed in class...so...?I knew a boy who was growing hair to donate to Locks of Love

(cancer pt. wigs) . He started the 2016 school year while it was still growing the required length. He didnt make the cut length before school started so he showed up with some long hair as school started. At his school the opposite happened
Some of his male classmates joined him and grew long hair to donate. Some made it to the required length some didnt keep it well enough to continue or they or parents got tired of the maintenance and cut it early. And of course it was only a small group of the boys but no other kids gave them flak that i know of , or teachers
http://www.locksoflove.org/get-involved/

I guess it depends on the area if someone with long hair will be ostracized. This was in the Chicago area so most areas around here no biggie to have long hair, fro, or fades or bun or hair color and be a boy. Seen it all. One older kid does pink hair dye during breast health awareness month every year because his mother had breast cancer.
I did ask if he got hassled about the color. My kids said no that everyone thinks its cool he does it.

Jabez looks fine to me. I hope he gets to keep his hair which imo looks neat, clean ,combed, and not disheveled. I have seen a lot worse upkeep on little girls his age

[rurallib]

112. Just had a friend do that

he was our mentee while in K-12. After HS he let his hair grow just so he could someday donate it to locks of love.

[DFW]

58. When I graduated high school, two students had beards

I was one of them, and I was pressured endlessly to shave it off. The other guy was a staunch Republican, and they didn't say a word to him. I don't know if his parents were prominent or not. Since I have extremely sensitive facial skin, if I shave my beard off, I turn red like a boiled lobster, so I refused. They let me graduate anyway, but not without a lot of grief.

A a minor revenge, this school, which counts at least two US presidents among its alumni, got stuck with a prank they will never be able to erase. My brother, a junior at a rival school across the state line, was at my graduation, and was with me when we were herded together for the official class photo. He tried to get away, but was pushed into the center with me. I was a nobody, and so none of the school's top administration gave it a second thought when they didn't recognize the guy next to me. So, our official class photo is the only one to contain a ringer from the rival school. The administration was so uncaring about their non-elite students, they never even noticed until someone informed them months later. By then it was too late. These people were so narrow-minded, it really upset them for a long time afterward! Luckily, I was only at this school for that one year, and as you might have guessed, both of the presidents who graduated from there were Republicans. Now, they come begging for alumni contributions, and swear the school has become much more progressive. I always tell them, then get your contributions from alumni who were NOT harassed during the time they were there, and consider that even nerds you thought were nobodies might someday go on to be successful.

I admire this mother's courage, although her boy will be the object of unmerciful bullying if he keeps his hair this way, unless this is one incredibly enlightened school--which seems to be anything BUT the case.

[RKP5637]

67. Just from a far far far outside view, I don't think this is the right school for this child. It's

probably quite authoritative.

[DFW]

72. I can understand that

The high school I graduated from was quite authoritative, and it sure as hell wasn't right for me.

For that matter, I, as well as many other boys, got harassed in the Middle School I went to, to get haircuts all the time. It was supposedly a "Quaker" school, but it was hardly friendly, despite the "Friends" in its official name. I have heard that in the meantime, it has done a complete 180° and has become one of the most enlightened schools in Washington (Clinton and Obama sent their daughters there, something I would never have recommended when I attended).

[vi5]

62. It's a private school, right?

So as stupid as it is, it's their rule.

I'm not sure why parents WANT to and actively fight for their right to send their kids to such regressive, idiotic institutions.

If it's because the school is good and that the education they provide is your priority then do what is required to send your kid to that school.

If your priority is you child developing an independent mind and free-spirit then send them to a school where they are free to be themselves and to follow that path in life.

[RKP5637]

68. Yep, I agree. It seems the wrong fit for this child. n/t

[kcr]

71. Nope, this is a public school n/t

[Doodley]

99. Good point. And are they fighting for their kid or just trying to

fight for themselves?

[bluestarone]

184. so what if

your boss said you need to be bald to work there? this school policy is BS! it's a complete family affair and NOT school affair! There policies suck! Next they will tell people how to vote?

[kcr]

69. Bullshit authoritarian mindset like this is why I moved to civilization

and have never been happier. They will soon start requiring skirts for girls. Mark my words.

[left-of-center2012]

73. Wow! Huffington Post is still around?

I stopped reading it after they kept revamping their site to "uninteresting" (to me)

[bdtrppr6]

203. yup

always hated going there, just like walking into a house of ill repute, but the change shut it down entirely. she's as evil as drumpf so good riddance. i bet we're not the only ones. insignificance happens fast on the net.

[cwydro]

75. As a girl, I had to wear dresses every single day.

I HATED dresses, and I wore jeans everywhere else back in the 60's.

Girls couldn't wear pants until I was in the 8th grade, and only then if the temp was below freezing. Not making this up. Somehow I survived.

I don't have a problem with this kid's hair, but what is it nowadays that NO ONE thinks their children should obey ANY rules?

[Runningdawg]

76. This child and his family

are dealing with an issue VERY familiar to Native American families. In 1976 my HS dress code required "boys hair when combed from the crown should not touch the eyebrows, ears or collar." For years NA boys got around this by putting their braids up under a wig that complied with the dress code. Then, they decided that wasn't good enough. Ultimately NA parents had to hire lawyers and won the case. The school board would not relent on the rule against long hair but had to accept the courts decision on the wigs. As far as I know, to this day, the dress code has not changed and NA boys still wear wigs.

[RKP5637]

89. And we're in the 21st century and this nonsense goes on. n/t

[maveric]

81. I'm glad I live in CA.

I can't believe some of the shit going on in other states.
Who sets these standards. Didn't dress codes go out in the 70s?

And Jesus had long hair.

[RKP5637]

90. I thought they had too! I can't believe all of this sh** still goes on! n/t

[ecstatic]

82. The school is wrong, but here is the part I object to:

“I will cut his hair the day he asks me to get his hair cut,” she told HuffPost.

She's the parent and she should be the one making decisions, not the other way around. The school shouldn't make the decision, but neither should her 4 year old child.

[Blue_Adept]

84. I'm sure the parents make plenty of decisions

But there's something to be said with kids in giving them some bodily autonomy to how they want to look, espescially since so many thing "we" find problematic tend to be gender-codified foolishness.

[ecstatic]

86. That's true, but she did force her will on the child

when she made the decision not to cut his hair at 12 months, 18 months, 2 then 3 years old. The long hair thing was her decision, and now she's pretending that it was her 4 year old's decision all along.

[Doodley]

101. You make a very important point. The kid is just a pawn. This is why I earlier

described it as child abuse. They are teaching him that rules don't have to be followed - just complain about them because the world revolves around the child. You end up with kids that grow up to be Donald Trumps.

[marybourg]

85. Yes. Those are my thoughts also. nt

[WhiskeyGrinder]

106. What does a parent lose by allowing a child to control his own body and appearance in a way that

hurts no one?

[VermontKevin]

165. This. It's his hair. As a parent you expect them to keep it clean, nothing else.

[delisen]

135. I disagree. His body is his to control. He should be able to choose his

hair length so long as it is not dangerous to others. His has no obligation, even as a child, to enforce the gender stereotypes of older people who seem to be living in the past.

[ecstatic]

159. He's 4 years old. A toddler practically. nt

[USALiberal]

217. Maybe a tattoo also if he wants one? n/t

[delisen]

220. The length of one's hair and a tattoo or scarring of the skin

are fundamentally different.

One does no damage to the body,is not permanent, and does not inflict physical pain. The other does damage, is considered permanent, and does inflict physical pain.

As there does not seem to be any significant difference between the head hair of boys and the head hair of girls, and if there is no rule regarding the length of hair of girls, this seems to me to be foremost a matter of discrimination based on gender.

[cagefreesoylentgreen]

103. What if the boy was Sikh?

Forcing a Sikh man or boy to cut his hair is religious discrimination. Makes me wonder if the school would demand such a thing if it were the case.

[RKP5637]

107. Probably. It seems they are pretty determined. n/t

[Warpy]

109. What's the policy for NA kids? Sikh kids?

I can't believe how many narrowminded assholes there are in parts of this country who are still stuck in Leave it to Beaver land.

I agree pulling it back would be a good idea, it would tend to get in the way a lot. Otherwise, not their kid, not their business.

[RKP5637]

113. To me, pulling it back would be more than adequate. FFS! A lot of this country does live back in

Cleaver days. I was surprised this was still so much of an issue.

[LeftInTX]

175. This kid is NA

I read it in the NY Post

[Skittles]

118. ridiculous

the rules for hair should be quite simple: clean and groomed

[rurallib]

119. Couple of relevant stories

My grandson is just over 7. As far as I know he hasn't had a haircut yet. But his hair is quite curly, so by nature it doesn't fall in his eyes but does go a bit past his collar. Wonder what the school would do about that.
His parents let him decide and he is quite happy with the way it is.
Having been subject to a buzz cut to the skin by my dad growing up every Friday, I really don't care if he gets it cut or not.

Among the kids we worked with in a mentoring group a few years back was a native American bot named Brandon. Brandon was ten when I first met him. His hair was almost to his waist. Yet that was the custom and it made no difference in his intelligence demeanor or manners. He was simply a nice young boy.

I note that in the handbook the school claims that among the goals are to "set our students apart from others." Looks like having all the boys with similar haircuts kind of negates that goal.

Substitute teaching one day I got into a discussion with a couple of 16YO boys on how most teen boys wore a uniform of tshirt, jeans, and running shoes. They were trying to tell me they were individuals.

[RKP5637]

121. Thanks!

[rurallib]

122. This sounds so much like the hair wars we went through in the 60s

so much is starting to sound like the early 60s again - racism, fear of getting nuked, misogynism.

But in this case, it sure seems like this is almost a repeat of something from my past.

When my dad bought a gas station when I was in college one of his best employees had hair down to the middle of his back. My father, who used to skin my head every week had an employee with the ever hated long hair.

I tried to grow mine out but it just got so thick and curly.

[RKP5637]

124. Exactly, I remember those days so well. I've always had long hair. I've never really

gotten why so many people whine about long hair. It must be an authoritative thing. And now this country is sliding back to the 50's/60's and what were some good parts back then will be left out, I'm sure. I'm so fed up with all of the sh**.

[erpowers]

125. Not A Little Long

That young man's hair is not "a little long"; his hair is really long for a boy. However, it is his body and he should be able to wear his hair however long he and his parents choose.

[delisen]

128. So Jesus would be barred from entering. He's in good company.

If girls are allowed long hair, so should boys be allowed.

We are living in a new authoritarian age. Too many people in America scared of freedom. How can we allay their fears?

[Mike__M]

137. This story is circulating in Native social media.

The family apparently has Cocopah heritage, and views the long hair as part of the boy's identity.

[TheFrenchRazor]

140. can't believe the shamelessly slavish capitulation to authority and arbitrary gender roles here; oh

oh wait, yes i can. when it comes to gender roles, "liberals" can be extremely primitive and superstitious.

[Exultant Democracy]

141. This is like telling a little orthodox Jewish boy no kippah.

Sue the shit out of the public school and pay for the kids college.

[TeeYiYi]

147. School dress codes...

...are about cleanliness, grooming, hygiene, and conforming to structured uniform standards like clothing color, shoe style, etc.

Dress code enforcement rights end where the human body begins. Since hair is connected to the head and part of the body as a whole, the school has no right to demand that it be cut.

As long as a child's hair is clean and groomed; styled so as "not to be a distraction," that should be the end of it.

No person has the right to demand that another person alter their body through the use of scissors, razor blade, scalpel, etc., to conform to some antiquated, arbitrary "dress code."

What if this school's dress code included a requirement that the school mascot be tattooed onto every student's forearm?

How about a policy for boys that the foreskin must not extend past the tip of the glans... purely for hygienic reasons, of course.

I applaud this woman for standing by her son's right to autonomy and control over his own body. His hair was clean and styled above the collar. End of story.

This school is finding itself on the wrong side of history. I hope they realize it and adjust themselves accordingly.

TYY

[RKP5637]

150. It's a school I would never want any of my kids near. And, I bet this antiquated authoritative

policy/rules extend into similar authoritative policies/rules. It sounds like an indoctrination school.

[Warren DeMontague]

148. Texas.

Figures.

[RKP5637]

152. Yep, my immediate thought too! n/t

[Warren DeMontague]

154. Not saying there's a connection, but that's also the state where cops can sexually assault motorists

because they "smelled weed"

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/lawyer-says-dashcam-video-shows-11-minute-search-of-womans-vagina_us_5991abd1e4b08a247275e473

[RKP5637]

156. I was only in Texas a couple of times as a kid. I hated it there, couldn't wait to leave. n/t

[Warren DeMontague]

157. I'm not gonna condemn the whole place.. Lots of great music, especially out of Austin.

I have nothing but praise for the 13th Floor Elevators, The Butthole Surfers, Steve Earle, James McMurtry...

but I've never had much desire to spend time down there.

Still hoping for the best for them in this storm, though.

[RKP5637]

160. Yep, definitely there are some good places.

[Major Nikon]

192. California

https://www.aclunc.org/sites/default/files/2015.08.24_ACLU-NC_to_Clovis_USD_re_dress_and_grooming_code.pdf

[Warren DeMontague]

195. Outside of Fresno? Sure.

Not surprising one bit.

I feel like Peter Fonda in Easy Rider myself, going through Fresno.

[Major Nikon]

199. Just sayin' Texas doesn't have a monopoly on the chickenshit

The problem in Texas, and probably most everywhere else is school board elections are off cycle from major elections, so the only people who tend to vote in them regularly are old people due to a big GOTV effort among wingnut churches. That's why the creationist nutbags have taken over our schools.

I think if Democrats really wanted to crush the GOP, they should focus some effort on getting progressively minded people to show up to off cycle elections and crush the overwhelming influence of the chickenshits over local elections. When these people lose their influence, they will stop showing up at the ballot box.

[csziggy]

164. Damn I thought this fight was over by 1970

[RKP5637]

166. Yeah, so did I! I can't believe this BS is still going on. n/t

[csziggy]

167. We're going to have to fight all the same battles over again

I'm female so my fight was the ability to wear pants to school. While I was still in high school they never allowed girls to wear jeans - we had to wear "pants suits" purchased from a store. Until my Mom raised hell - she asked why were girls required to take Home Ec if we couldn't wear the clothes we made to school. So then they allowed pants suits if we had made them.

Mom had helped me make a outfit from red brushed denim to wear when I showed my horse - nice boot cut pants with a neat vest. I wore that to school and was sent to the office since "Denim has to be jeans!" The pants were not cut the same as jeans, were not made of the standard at the time blue denim, and the principal decided that the vest made it a pants suit.

On the other hand, my husband and his brothers fought for long hair in their high school in a different town - and they won. By the time my husband graduated, his hair was halfway to his waist. He's cut it twice since - once for court and once for job hunting. It's still long and will remain that way so far as I am concerned.

[RKP5637]

168. It all is just damn incredible, the authoritarians! Damn, I really hate those people! n/t

[bluestarone]

186. this

100%

[LAS14]

169. Oh, wow. I don't know whether or not to share this...

.... with my son and daughter-in-law, just FYI, since my 6 yr old grandson has beautiful long locks and doesn't want them cut. My son says, if he doesn't get them cut, he'll just be a hockey player with really long hair.

What has become of us???/

[RKP5637]

170. I thought all the crap about hair went out in the 70's. One step froward in the US, then

three backward. The US is going nowhere in the future and will be a second rate power with no respect by the international community.

[Warren DeMontague]

197. If we let him have the long hair, before long he'll be on our lawn

[RKP5637]

198. ...

[raven mad]

200. We shut down a high school (ours) in 1970 because of this!

It worked then.

[bdtrppr6]

204. FEAR OF A HAIRY PLANET

let your freak flag fly

[Doreen]

205. This reminds me of something that happened in high school.

The school just out of the blue told the boys that they were no longer allowed to wear shorts. This was in the 80's and mini skirts for the girls were in style. Well, the next day half of the boys ended up in school with mini skirts. By the time school ended that day the school announced that boys could wear shorts.

[RKP5637]

209. K&R!!! n/t

[Joe Fields]

213. My son was born in 1987. My wife and I decided to not cut his hair.

By the time he was in the sixth grade, his hair almost reached his butt. He was very proud of his hair and took good care of it. Not once, not one time did ANY school official make an issue of it. Thank God he was in a progressive, inclusive school district. Most importantly he made straight A's all throughout his school career.

He decided, in his senior year, to cut his hair and have it donated to Locks For Love. It was entirely his decision.

What type of stone age school makes an issue of hair? I can't wrap my head around that.

[RKP5637]

218. I'm so happy to hear this. Your son, wife and you are so lucky! I was rather stunned when I

came across this article. I thought much of that nonsense went out decades ago. It really is a stone age school. I haven't researched the school at all, but if the child is not interested in being educated in an authoritarian environment, he will might enjoy another school.