when someone you have lived with

[onethatcares]

for a long, long, long time comes out in agreement with the losers of the civil war, what are you to do?

after a little less than 50 years, i find out my wife thinks the statues are alright, and that it's all a big to do about nothing.

I'm gobblesmacked.

She is of the opinion that the nazis at UVA were just protesting the take down of the REL statue and history will be lost
when they are taken down.

I'm gobblesmacked further.

I don't know how to respond anymore.

[Solly Mack]

1. I don't think anyone is going to forget the Civil War as long as people write books.

And can read.

There are museums that tell the story of the Civil War. They just don't necessarily glorify the Confederacy.

And there is a difference.

[NightWatcher]

2. fart and hold the covers over her head while she sleeps

She says its much ado about nothing. Maybe she's just not been paying attention to all of the details of the news. As long as she doesn't hold the views of the nazis and is still the person you've been with for 50 years, just let it slide. Don't let it destroy you.

Smile smugly, knowing she breathes your farts.

[whathehell]

7. No.

That's using force and somehow I don't think the poster is here asking for "punishment" ideas.

[AlexSFCA]

3. some people are just not political

we are all fired up here on DU. E.g., most of my friends are very apolitical and avoid all news. They say things cause they don't really care and not knowledgable. They only start to care once it affects them directly.

[kerry-is-my-prez]

4. One of my "good" friends said the same thing. She's an Indy and is not from the South.

[sinkingfeeling]

5. Why do we need statues? Lee's and the others' faces can be found

In books.

[LisaM]

6. I didn't know that most of these statues were put up much later.

Not that I've ever held sympathy for the Confederacy, but in fact, most of the statues were put up due to a 20th century effort by the United Daughters of the Confederacy to tint the past in a rosier light. Apparently Lee himself didn't hold with putting up these statues. There were some memorials to family members of people in the confederate states, put up at the time that perhaps should be treated differently, but many of the statues people are discussing now were part of a broad effort taken well after the Civil War, at a time when the US was, unfortunately, enacting Jim Crow types of statutes. In a sense, they have nothing to do with history or even the Civil War.

There aren't any of these statues in the cities I where I live or spend the most time, so I never run into them. I now consider that I was uneducated about when and where they were put up. I've learned a lot this past week (and the SPLC has done a yeoman's job putting up maps where these statues are).

I'm glad I know more now, because as a one-time history major, I don't believe in erasing the past. However, these statues were put up not as memorials, but, basically (as I see it) an affront to civil rights efforts.

[Qutzupalotl]

8. Remember when everyone forgot about the Berlin Wall after they tore it down?

And why did we ever erect statues to traitors in the first place?

[onethatcares]

9. thank you for the replies

I guess I'll just let it ride for now. I've attempted to explain the significance of people being sold to others but she's heard teh George Washington/Thomas Jefferson meme and even though I've tried to explain the world was different back in the 1700s compared to the late 1800s she thinks the statues are no big deal.

It's been a long time, I now know how she thinks.

Again,thank you all.

[gratuitous]

12. Try this

Statues on public lands in the United States - lands that belong to all of us, not just the white people who controlled them for so long - should commemorate the good citizens of our country, not to people who took up arms against the United States and killed thousands to perpetuate slavery.

[HeartachesNhangovers]

10. Now hold on there.

when someone ... comes out in agreement with the losers of the civil war...

Thinking that Confederate statues aren't a huge issue isn't anything like being a Confederate sympathizer. The statues are a big deal today, but for decades they mostly weren't.

Now if your wife is a modern-day slavery advocate, that would be a different story.

[grantcart]

11. Well

1) If someone has started to change their personality after 50 years it might be medically related.

2) whether 1),in which case you need a doctor's opinion is required or some other issue and you need a marriage counselor DU is not the go to place for professional assistance.

3) I am gobsmacked at your repeatedly being gobblesmacked which I can only imagine involves getting hit on the side of the heat by a turkey.