I'm feeling slightly ill. I just read Ann Rmoney's op-ed on motherhood.

[cali]

I'm not going to say much about it; I'll put in the link if you want to read it, but one thing that struck me as odd is that she begins by saying that until her son was born, she'd never held a baby. Other than that it was the usual load of mashed up cliches that people trot out on Mother's Day. The crap about how every mother is wonderful- which is a ridiculous lie.

anyway:

http://www.usatoday.com/news/opinion/forum/story/2012-05-10/ann-romney-mitt-stay-home-work-mom-grandkids/54862378/1?AID=4992781&PID=4166869&SID=186o0wqazaozw

[spanone]

1. drivel

[Siwsan]

2. I don't think I know any other woman who never held a baby until she gave birth!?!?!?!?

I can include most men I know, too, as having at least HELD an infant. Honestly, I am GOB SMACKED.

[JDPriestly]

13. That Ann Romney never held a baby until she gave birth just cannot be true.

How in the world is that possible?

By that time, I had done so much babysitting that I knew the entire routine. The only thing that was new to me was bathing a tiny baby. I had bathed babies that were a few months old, but not the just-home-from-the-hospital kind of baby or the this-tiny-human-belongs-to-me kind of baby. That was a shock.

Surely, there is some mistake.

[kestrel91316]

20. Perhaps Ann Rmoney came from a family well-enough-off that

babysitting simply wasn't DONE by the young ladies.

[riderinthestorm]

30. She does. nt

[hfojvt]

32. I have three sisters

and I think only one did much babysitting, although my sisters might correct me on that. But also, babysitting is often not done for infants, but for older children ages 1-10.

[REP]

45. I never have in my entire life; I'm an adult woman.

See my other post

[Maraya1969]

50. I remember being young enough that I had to sit on the couch

and have the baby put on my lap just to make sure I would not drop him so I could say I "held the baby". I thought that is what all families did.

Perhaps not.

[REP]

44. I have never held or otherwise touched a baby; I'm a 47 year old woman

I (obviously) don't have children. Didn't babysit much as a kid, and never infants. Have no desire to change this

[goclark]

3. Ms. Mitt

didn't hardly write that ~ her staff wrote it.


If she was stupid enough to write ... or even allow the staff to write without her approving " every mother is wonderful" can you even imagine what she would say/do as First Lady?

EVERY mother is not "Wonderful" ...... my precious mother happened to be but I know some other Mother's that are hardly, "wonderful."

[JDPriestly]

14. Judging from what I have heard throughout my life,

maybe one in three mothers is really wonderful.

My mother still is wonderful and a great joy in my life. But then, she is a staunch Democrat, and that is no coincidence. She really cares and not just about her own children.

[greatauntoftriplets]

4. Why are the grandkids all dressed alike?

Do they think they are the Duggars?

[Gormy Cuss]

8. IIRC that's a tradition for the annual family photo.

They don't dress alike normally.

[marlakay]

5. Well she obviously didn't have to

Babysit for money as a teen like me!

[goclark]

7. This statement tells a lot about Ms. Mitt

If she wrote this -- she is crazy.
If she had someone else write the words below, she is crazy for apprving it......


Talking about her own mother !!!!!!


"I think the thing she loved the most was that I was always the ringleader, always more likely to get others into trouble than to follow along"

[jp11]

11. If I had to pick one of those two things to be true for my own kid or even niece/nephew I'd

rather they were the ringleader instead of the one who does other people's bidding. It says something about the kid's willpower to be manipulated like that.

Of course you could argue the ringleader is worse for choosing to manipulate other people but that can be used for 'good' or 'bad'. Blindly following other people because of your own insecurities I think is inherently 'worse' because you defer your own judgement to another's good or bad.

We can pick just about any 'bad' movement and find the ringleaders rallying up people to carry out their will when all it would have taken to stop them is for the people who followed to not do so, to stand up for themselves. Perhaps even fightback against that single 'leader' to have the movement stall or perhaps fall apart completely.

Just saying it isn't as 'crazy' as you seem to think it is.

[JDPriestly]

15. I'm with you, marlakay, and the happier and better off for the experience.

[Iris]

6. Oh, dear. When I read this, I thought it said Ayn Rand.

wtf?

[gratuitous]

10. I shall forbear clicking on the link

Are we treated to the trials and tribulations of finding decent help?

If you are in such a state that your children have no bread to eat, I hope Ann advises us to feed them cake.

And, naturally, the difficult choice faced by a large number of parents across the country: Sick child, do you stay home to care for him or her, risking your lousy job that at least puts food on the table, or go to said lousy job and hope that the child doesn't take a turn for the worse while you're getting screamed at for not reading the boss's mind. What say you, Ann? Summary termination of the maid, or do you pay out a little more rope to make the final firing that much more satisfying?

[Faygo Kid]

12. I wonder who wrote it for her.

Ann has never had to lift a finger herself.

[JDPriestly]

16. "she begins by saying that until her son was born, she'd never held a baby"

That explains how she can be a Republican.

She never understood how helpless humans are.

She does not realize that for humans, long-term survival is not of the fittest, but survival of the most nurtured.

Once a threshold of physical strength and health has been passed, human survival depends on how well a human baby's parents and society, especially the mother and the social group that supports the mother can and are willing to care for it.

And that is why the society that Democrats strive toward -- a society of free people who provide each other basic support and nurture succeeds while the Republican model -- in which it is each child for himself cannot.

It's all about parental love and nurture. You either value it or you don't. And if you value it, you want to make sure every child, every person gets it.

[Viva_Daddy]

17. I thought it was very revealing opinion piece.

Lots of self-pity and not a single thought on the plight of those less fortunate than herself - the single mothers, the low-income mothers, the unemployed mothers...all mothers without the support, money and privilege that she's had all her life. Like her husband, emotionally isolated from the rest of mankind.

[goclark]

18. I just looked at the photo

I see what they do now ~ Men all wear blue,
little girls all wear orange etc.


I'm not from a big family so we just take snap shots.

Can others tell me if their family dresses up in colors for Mother's Day???
I'm not putting it down at all, just wondering.

Seems like they are a very "organized" family ~ but it doesn't in my opinion carry over to the way The Mitts act on the campaign trail.

He " can't remember" ever abusing a classmate ~
She "can't remember ever meeting a mother that wasn't a "good mother."
He "forgets" to make his tax returns public etc. etc. etc.

[kestrel91316]

21. Marching in lockstep and the APPEARANCE of family unity

are hallmarks of Mormonism.

[hfojvt]

19. I guess people can always find reasons to hate

I don't find all that much objectionable in it. Nor did she explicitly say that every mother is wonderful. Would you really expect that a column on Mother's Day is gonna include "mommie dearest"?

As a son, I did sorta object to this

"There were times I wanted to tear my hair out. I can remember visiting my friends' houses, seeing their daughters' manners, the way they helped with the chores. Then I would return home to my boys, hoping only that my house was still intact."

Excuse me, mom? Sons never do chores? The number of times I swept the stairs, cleaned the basement, filled the dishwasher, cleaned the cupboards and the refrigerator (this was when I was 18 and they left me home alone I went through all the leftovers in the fridge and either ate it or threw it away, but mom came back to a clean fridge), cut the grass, set up the camper, hauled cement blocks and other things, etc., etc., etc. And you would joke that sons don't help with chores??? edit (oh and I forgot - took out the trash, shovelled snow. 16 tons of snow shovelled and what do you get, your mother joking that sons don't do chores? (But of course, the column was not written by my mother, just a stand-in for all mothers.)

But that's okay too. Not a reason to hate. I expect to be under appreciated (cue the violins)
(edit 2: though that reminds me of sort of a funny story. We visited my 86 year old grandmother in the nursing home, and when we said hi she seemed confused. Marie? Marie? Who the heck is Marie? Mom says, you know Marie and Neil. Her face lights up "Oh, Neil". Her own daughter, she does not remember, ah, but her handsome son-in-law. So mom can relate to being unappreciated. She often complains that her mom would gush about "her boys" and she complains "I was the one doing all the work". So happy mother's day, mom.)

[kestrel91316]

22. In Mormonism, men join the priesthood while quite young

(ALL males attain the priesthood and NO females do, by definition) and so their mothers become subservient to them while they are still teens and Mom CAN NOT DISCIPLINE them or correct them or find fault with them in any way.

It's the LDS way.

[hfojvt]

27. my own mom was very subservient

although I made cookies (probably with lots of help) even in the 5th grade. (Although I think that may have been the only time, generally I would not be allowed to mess up mom's kitchen). I can remember a few times when I would be sitting down, sorta note to myself that I did not have any milk, get right back up and run into mom who was running to the refrigerator to get me milk. She was a workaholic, somewhat, and took some pride in doing what she perceived to be her job.

But she was also the "bad cop" doing much of the disciplining, while my dad was more easy going.

Not that my family is normal, but I relate things to my own experiences. What you describe as the LDS way sounds very strange, but I think that the LDS also have a very strict code, so somebody must be disciplining and correcting the young men to conform to that code, unless that only happens at church and they run wild in their own homes.

[kestrel91316]

39. They are all about superficial appearances, you notice how they all look like

Stepford people - the women have the perfect hair, nails, clothing, submissive demeanor. The men all look like Ken dolls. I think they are subject to public shaming of a sort and airing of their dirty laundry in church if they do not act perfect anytime anybody in the church is watching. It's quite bizarre and controlling.

[cali]

23. I don't hate her. I didn't like the column and I think there's a lot

about her to comb over. I don't think she has a clue real life outside the most privileged bubble imaginable.

Oh, and one doesn't have to include mommie dearest to avoid the most hackneyed cliches.

[hfojvt]

29. I happen to like hackneyed cliches (and saccharine)

it's better than a bitter, judgemental, cynicism. Heck, if I want that, I can just go look in a mirror, or read one of my poems.

[cali]

35. the problem with hackneyed cliches is they're often employed in a dishonest way

meant to prey on the emotions. I've always thought that saccharine sentimentalism is a dangerous tool.

[hfojvt]

36. I don't think so

although in this case, her column is meant to mine for votes, but otherwise "a noble spirit really does embiggen us all."


And just to explain. That "quote" is from an episode of The Simpsons. Lisa discovers that the founder of Springfield was really Jedediah Sprongfeld, a bit of a rapscallion (or worse) and she is about to tell the town, but then she sees the town out there happy and enthusiastic about Springfield Day and the founder Jedediah Springfield, whose signature quote was "a noble spirit embiggens us all", and she basically sees that the myth of Jedediah Springfield is a foma - a harmless untruth. As Vonnegut (or maybe it was Bokonon) wrote "believe in the foma that make you brave and strong and happy".

[chowder66]

24. Um....

I have never held a baby. I am in my forties. And I babysat.
I babysat toddlers and older children. My family is scattered so I was not around them when they started having children.
My apologies for making you ill for a second time by revealing this.

The funny thing is I can't find that statement in that story about every mother being wonderful. Not that there would be anything wrong with making a general statement in that respect. It's an article about her experience as a mom and a tribute to her mother. It's not like she is trying to say this in an article about mothers who kill their children.

If anything I see her being specific about good mothers that wipe away tears, etc.

If you want to be angry and frustrated - there is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much more to choose from...starting with her husband who is the one running for office. If she is injecting herself into his politics then by all means have at it but this is not a political article on policy or an attack on democrats/liberals/progressives.

There are battles to fight and then there are these.

[cali]

25. sorry, she's actively campaigning and you need to read more closely.

and she's supposedly an important asset to the campaign. Her husband has certainly injected her into policy. She has herself. I'm neither angry or frustrated by it, I simply think the facts are important. They're using her to project empathy and caring. She supports her husband's policies that hurt the most vulnerable among us.

You want to feel bad for Ann Romney, feel free. And I'll post the facts about her. Too, too terribly bad, dahling that you find it distasteful. I'm sure you have smelling salts and a lace hanky on hand.

[chowder66]

37. My My My

I agree that she is part of the imaging but this article is not one to be digging for turds in.There are plenty of arguments in other respects to the imaging she is trying to portray on behalf of her husbands campaign. You did a much better job of it in some of the healthcare issues you raise in other posts..you are even "careful".

The problem I have is that you state you are posting facts. What facts are you referring to? That she wrote an article about being a mother and paying some tribute to her mom? Or is it that you are so upset that she didn't hold a baby. I just don't get your fact finding argument or even a reasonable argument based on that article.

It is your opinion on your part. NOT FACTS.

Do tell. What is it that makes women who don't hold babies before they have their own so sickening to you?
Where is the sentence in the article saying all mothers are wonderful. I am not the only person stating I could not find that. (FACT PLEASE).

And finally, just because I take issue with your issue-taking; in regard to the article you linked to... and your "feeling ill" over a mysteriously missing sentence and her lack of holding babies does not make me "feel bad for Ann Romney". Nice try to get a dig in at someone who is seriously confused by your opinion on that article that really doesn't justify anything worth noting. (you might ask, if it isn't worth noting then why are you posting about it? Because I find it confusing and lazy. I would hope you would continue to pick battles of import and not tabloid type fodder).

I don't find it distasteful - as you like to try to put words in my mouth. I find your opinion about it odd when there is so much to choose from. It is your right to go after petty things but it is my right to call it petty when I see it. Oh and just stop it with the bullshit "dahling, smelling salts and lace hanky" crap. It's childish and once again..... Petty.

[magical thyme]

26. what a load of crap

"Some might say it was the mothering gene kicking in, the same one that every mom throughout history has possessed."



People would tell her, as people are wont to do with little girls, that she had a beautiful daughter. "If only you knew," she would say, "how much more beautiful she is on the inside."

Such words gave me my place in the world.

Oh well aren't you just so speshul.


Women wear many hats in their lives. Daughter, sister, student, breadwinner.

Oh really? When were you the breadwinner, Ann? What the fuck would you know about it?

[RB TexLa]

28. What's odd? Who's baby would you have held before you have one??????

[cali]

31. let's see: babysitting, friend's children, relatives, siblings...

[Safetykitten]

33. Exactly. She can say with absolute certainty she has never, ever held a baby...

But again, I suppose the line of infants at the robot factory was not in production when she was there.

[RB TexLa]

38. I still don't think it's that odd. I've never held a baby.

I wouldn't think that's any kind of major feat. Or anything that would cause someone to pause over.

[RB TexLa]

42. No, it's because I don't have any children and have never held anyone else's.

[Johnny Rico]

43. I've never held a baby either.

What's so strange about that?

[REP]

46. Not a goddamned thing.

And I'll repeat - I'm an adult woman. Never held or touched one; have no desire to do so (besides, my immune system is too messed up to be around them because of the e coli). My brother is a year younger than I am, and I rarely babysat as a kid; when I did, it was for school-age kids, not infants.

[riderinthestorm]

34. Kids who have had to work for $$ like babysitting or taking care of younger siblings usually.

Very few kids get out of performing chores or working except if you're rich or in a very rare subsection that managed to avoid this (happens but it is rare)

[REP]

47. I did work that actually paid as a kid. Babysitting is a sucker's game.

When I did do it, I charged $10/hr - and that was in the early 80s! My mother would not let me do it for less (and that's what she paid sitters who watched us when we were the age that needed sitters).

[MadrasT]

48. I held my first and last baby when I was 44.

My niece. For 2 minutes. I don't find it odd at all.

Ann Romney is a clueless member of the 1%, but I can't work up any emotion over the "never held a baby" remark.

[Dawson Leery]

49. Ann is a bad her Mittens.

Neither one of them have sympathy for the average person.
By the contents in this article, clearly she knows nothing about parenting.

[zappaman]

51. Wow.

How becoming of you.
I would never vote for her husband under ANY circumstances, but to denigrate his wife for voicing human emotions is disgusting and says far more about you than her.