Sorry, but if you did your job as a parent, your kid would NOT be rioting in the streets!!!

[Yavin4]

The responses to this thread make me want to vomit.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1002&pid=6581724


To say that she's a great mother is utter nonsense. Being a great mother/parent means your kid stays in the house while rioting is going on. That's a lesson that should be instilled from day one. Next, she resorts to violence to get him to go home. Again, a good parent gets her kid home without hitting him in public which only teaches him that violence and public humiliation are acceptable forms of behavior.

This woman is a disaster as a parent.

[Beaverhausen]

1. On yeah

[mfcorey1]

137. Well, well. Wisdom dispensed from the Dr Spock of DU. Bucket!

[Ed Suspicious]

2. I don't judge other parents too harshly. My glass house is super fragile.

[Warpy]

61. No shit! At some point, usually during the early to mid teens,

the larger kid culture takes over and conformity with them becomes a necessary survival skill.

I was a teenager from hell. My upbringing was weird but solid in most ways and I outgrew being a teenager from hell and turned into a very solid citizen because of that upbringing. These rioting kids will likely do the same if they are allowed to grow up outside a prison.

Blaming parents is a loser's game.

[JDPriestly]

81. But their violence in this situation is hurting their cause.

They are shifting the focus from the violence and killing by the police to their own violence. That is not a good strategy. It is a stupid strategy.

Kids need to learn at ages 2-3 to use their words and not violence to express their anger. And parents need to listen and understand the anger of their children on the one hand and on the other strictly demand self-control when it comes to the expression of physical violence toward others or their toys. It is a question of being firm with children.

When parents hit their children or yell at them, the children learn that is what grown-ups do.

There are excellent courses on parenting and on non-violent communication. Parents should take them. There is no reason and no excuse for being violent with children.

[Warpy]

165. Of course it's hurting them

and will continue to hurt them as the businesses they loot and burn don't rebuild in that neighborhood.

However, expecting them to have an adult perspective on this at 14-15 is pretty silly. A very few of the smartest ones will. The rest won't. They have to live it themselves to get it.

It's also a losing game to ASSume this mother is consistently violent to her children from this one video. You don't know that. I don't know that. She saw her son doing something that could have gotten him shot and lost it. That's all we know.

[JDPriestly]

168. True about the mother. She was frightened for her son.

[JonLP24]

185. Was it your upbringing or your brain developing?

I was very similar but I can't say I credit my upbringing but mine & yours' story of being wild & crazy during teen years to being normal & well-adjusted is remarkably common.

FRONTLINE's "Inside the Teenage Brain" focuses on work done by Dr. Jay Giedd at the National Institute of Mental Health in Bethesda, Md., together with colleagues at McGill University in Montreal. In a particularly interesting study, Dr. Giedd looked at the brains of 145 normal children by scanning them at two-year intervals. This was work Giedd was only able to do with magnetic resonance imaging, because it requires neither harmful dyes nor radiation, making the study of normal children, as opposed to sick ones, ethically tenable.

What the researchers have found has shed light on how the brain grows and when it grows. It was thought at one time that the foundation of the brain's architecture was laid down by the time a child is five or six. Indeed, 95 percent of the structure of the brain has been formed by then. But these researchers have discovered changes in the structure of the brain that appear relatively late in child development.

Changes in the Prefrontal Cortex

Giedd and his colleagues found that in an area of the brain called the prefrontal cortex, the brain appeared to be growing again just before puberty. The prefrontal cortex sits just behind the forehead. It is particularly interesting to scientists because it acts as the CEO of the brain, controlling planning, working memory, organization, and modulating mood. As the prefrontal cortex matures, teenagers can reason better, develop more control over impulses and make judgments better. In fact, this part of the brain has been dubbed "the area of sober second thought."

The fact that this area was still growing surprised the scientists. Although they knew that the brain of a baby grew by over-producing synapses, or connections, they had not known that there was a second period of over-production. In a baby, the brain over-produces brain cells (neurons) and connections between brain cells (synapses) and then starts pruning them back around the age of three. The process is much like the pruning of a tree. By cutting back weak branches, others flourish. The second wave of synapse formation described by Giedd showed a spurt of growth in the frontal cortex just before puberty (age 11 in girls, 12 in boys) and then a pruning back in adolescence.

Even though it may seem that having a lot of synapses is a particularly good thing, the brain actually consolidates learning by pruning away synapses and wrapping white matter (myelin) around other connections to stabilize and strengthen them. The period of pruning, in which the brain actually loses gray matter, is as important for brain development as is the period of growth. For instance, even though the brain of a teenager between 13 and 18 is maturing, they are losing 1 percent of their gray matter every year.

http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/teenbrain/work/adolescent.html

The Pre-Frontal Cortex is a key area of the brain of what makes a sociopath a sociopath, its a very fascinating area of the brain.

This isn't to say I disagree with your overall points, I agree 100% -- especially the prison part.

[Warpy]

186. Probably equal parts

I was a serious hell raiser, to the point my parents actually kept a bail fund. They never needed it, of course, I was the right color to stay out of jail and could talk my way out of anything. I never hurt people but I was a little hard on property here and there.

The point is that I survived it out of prison. Most kids will, given half a chance.

Throwing them in prison based on the color of their skin is pure evil. It's the best way to make sure their lives are ruined and stay that way.

Adolescents are not adults and should never be treated as adults.

[JonLP24]

187. I certainly agree with all that, of course

Especially considering from my POV that a teen's brains isn't fully developed hence a lot of rebellious stuff as well as my own actions growing up to now where I live a very boring lifestyle but it also appears in this case there is a strong evidence of "kettling" noted by the Mother Jones from the Mondawmin Mall and so on. Looking at overhead footage of the CVS looting clearly riot police are blocking off an intersection

Clifton Norbury @seabethree

These are not gangs. These are children. You close Mondawnin, close the metro stop. And wonder why children are just "around" Mondawnin.

http://static.guim.co.uk/ni/1430215178448/baltimore_riots.svg

In any case, I agree 100% with you.

[riderinthestorm]

164. +10 million. SMH at the simplistic BS nt

[bravenak]

3. If our society was decent, there would be no reason for Riots!!!

Dumb.

[Yavin4]

7. Bullshit. The majority of the kids in those same neighborhoods stayed home.

Only a small percentage are rioting.

[bravenak]

8. Bullshit yourself.

There are always sparks to the fire of riots. Usually a police officer beats or murders somebody and then riots. Not everybody participates, most stay home.

[marym625]

21. You said it baby!

But I am referring to it as the uprising it was. Now being controlled by unconstitutional curfews and military on streets of our cities firing tear gas at peaceful protesters showing civil disobedience

[Yavin4]

26. I get it. This is just what all Black kids do, right?

We're all like that. Huh?

[R. Daneel Olivaw]

52. Kids, students, youth when they see injustice all around that never is rectified.

[BlueCaliDem]

80. Perish the thought!

When White kids do it, it’s not a riot, it’s a “celebration”, damn it!
When Black kids do it, it's always, always A RIOT111!!!

http://www.salon.com/2015/04/28/lest_we_forget_when_white_kids_do_it_its_not_a_riot_its_a_celebration/

[leftynyc]

85. Except you didn't see even one person here

defending that behavior.

[MH1]

101. ^^^ This.

Sure, there are plenty of reasons for the people rioting to be pissed at "the system" and the circumstances that have them trapped. But some of them are taking their anger out randomly against other people who are NOT the source of their problems. There are many other people being hurt now who are part of the original victim's neighborhood, not part of "the system" ... and this rioting is taking the focus off the wrongs of the police.

Two wrongs DON'T make a right.

[BlueCaliDem]

149. Not outright, but by implication. Did you even follow the thread before you came to my post? eom

[Gormy Cuss]

155. Because drunk rioting has no purpose whatsoever.

There is no social or political justification for violence in the name of sports wins or losses.

[BlueCaliDem]

163. ^^^This x 1000^^^ eom

[leftynyc]

167. I don't think tearing apart

your neighborhood is a good idea no matter what color you are. Those people that worked at CVS are now unemployed. I saw one family owned store that had been there for years was completely torn apart and one of their employees (had been there for 5 years) now doesn't have a job and she has 3 children to feed. Do I understand the frustration, anger and hopelessness of those rioting? Yes but the reality is they're only hurting themselves and their neighborhood. The media people are going to go home to their comfortable lives and the people of Baltimore are going to be stuck with the mess.

[Gormy Cuss]

171. If you understand the frustration, anger, etc. it should be easy to understand the destruction.

However, be careful on that assumption that the rioters are hurting their own neighborhood.

Yeah, Baltimore will be stuck with the mess. It's stuck with its PD too.

[bravenak]

122. I don't know jack about you and assumed you were an adult. Apparently I was wrong.

[JDPriestly]

82. That is why Martin Luther King trained people to remain non-violent

prior to demonstrations or civil disobedience. It is not an easy thing. The police will become violent just because the can. And that is why we need both to train our children about how to deal with the police and how to protect themselves in a non-violent way from police violence.

It is time for community action to train citizens to deal with police violence, how to report police violence, how to photograph police violence, etc.

These killings are too frequent.

But when the demonstrators become violent, the violence of the demonstrators shifts the focus of the press and the public away from the police violence and on to the violence of the demonstrators. Martin Luther King understood that that was what would happen if he did not train those who marched with him.

We need that kind of training for those who are demonstrating today.

[bravenak]

123. That shit did not work.

It may have helped, but there was always Malcolm in the background threatening violent revolution. Nobody want to sit around getting beat and fire hosed just to make white folks see us as human. Been there, done that, if it had worked we wouldn't be here. Peopke in the street be marchin and cops be beating. Those kids martin dealt with were college students, not the poorest of the poor living in run down projects who had already lived hand to mouth and were brought up with violence on all sides. And they skip the billy clubs these days and just shoot us in the back. Just because something brings back good memories to you, don't mean we gonna do a replay of history so's y'all can watch us get beat on for 14 years while marching. People who expect nonviolent marching singing we shall overcome are not the ones who gon get bit up by police dogs or get the shit beat out of them.
I'd rather we didn't have to constantly fight to be human. I'd rather we didn't hav riots because the poorest and blackest get ignored.

[JDPriestly]

140. Believe it or not. It is also frustrating to be a white person who strongly

disagrees with the racism of the police.

The core of the problem is racism, and it is hidden from those of us who are white because by definition, it does not happen to us. It especially doesn't happen to a person like me. And that is the fact even though I live in a neighborhood that is under a gang injunction.

It is so definitely racism and so definitely strongest in black neighborhoods that are poor that we barely even see it out of the corners of our eyes. And that goes for me even though I worked with homeless people, mostly single, black men for years and visited jails, etc.

But when I for one look at the statistics, the arrests, and, as I have said, dealt with homeless people or visited a juvenile hall or some other place in which there are a lot of accused people (like the criminal courthouse or a jail), then I see a disproportionate amount of people of color. In LA that includes not just black people, but a lot of people who are clearly Spanish-speaking. (Though the victims of harassment and excessive force according to the statistics are overwhelmingly black).

We just don't see the racism. We don't experience it. The police know they have no free pass to abuse us. Besides, the assumption is that we are innocent until proven guilty. This brutality really is about racism. Although as you say it is also about poverty. There is an assumption in our society that black people are poor and will always be poor, and it goes back hundreds of years. That assumption holds even with regard to people about whom it is clearly false.

I think there is a difference between the widespread harassment by police and the conduct of the police when confronting demonstrators. In the latter situation, in demonstrations, police officers surely know that cameras are running. And similarly, the demonstrators should know that. The police are brutal, but they wait until on the camera, it looks like the brutality is the fault of the demonstrators. They wait until the demonstrators do something dramatic that looks bad to the TV viewers.

Therefore, the demonstrations need to be better organized, better directed. I think that will happen as black people and their supporters realize that the problem of police aggression against them is racial and is not going away without raising the awareness of white voters in an effective way.

The point in the demonstrations, it seems to me (although who am I to say this but then maybe it will help make the demonstrations that are needed more effective) has to be to raise WHITE consciousness of the fact that the police sadism is strangely and effectively targeted at black people. The point is not to give demonstrators an opportunity to vent their anger. The demonstrations should be a means to communicate the reality to the majority which is white.

Regardless how understandable or even justified black people may see the violence of the demonstrators, black people need to understand that even the slightest reaction to the police brutality in front of a rolling camera defeats the purpose of demonstrating. It makes the police look justified when out of the view of the camera the police brutality continues.

To be effective, the demonstrations need in my opinion to contrast the racism of the police with peacefulness of people in the black community. To convey a meaningful message, the demonstrations have to be peaceful. When the demonstrations turn violent for any reason, then white people who have no idea about what is really going on with police racism will see the black violence or disruption and think the police are attacking black people because the black people did something wrong.

I know it is difficult. I know it is unfair. But knowing that most white people have utterly no understanding of and no experience with police brutality in this country, it seems to me that the first task of black people is to make sure white people who are in the majority at the polls understand beyond any doubt that it is racism that is the problem, not some flaw in black people.

Please let me know if you think I am wrong. As I said, that racism in the police is a big problem is very clear from these individual incidents and from the statistics as well as from my own experience. But how to get other white people to SEE that? If you think something else would work, what would you suggest?

I don't think things will change until knowledge of the reality of the problem goes much further beyond the black community. I understand the frustration, but it is going to take organizing and some strategy to make the movement toward decent policing a reality.

[bravenak]

143. Sadly.

If white peopke don't see the racism for what it is by now, no amount of marching peacefully is going to do shit.
Remember how Martin marched peacefully and Malcolm preached black power and necessary violence? Nothing would have been done Martin's way if had not Malcolm been in the bachground scaring the shit out of power.

We tired of begging and asking. Soon we won't be asking. We will be demanding just like white foljs demanded freedom. Can't ask or beg or supplicate yourself to those who hate you for your color.

And this generation is worse off than that generation was with all their fathers in jail in this drug war. We ain't got no Daddies to teach non violence no more! They all in jail now. Being raise on one poor ass income with all those sibling to support. These kids done already been beat down. They not all finna sit around singing we shall overcome while getting beat in order to put on a show for white folks to feel sorry for them. That's already been done time and again.

It's time to change shit without expecting us to beg. Ain't gonna beg.

[Gormy Cuss]

158. ^^^This^^^

Both MLK's and Malcolm X's approaches were necessary to effect change.

[treestar]

141. I give MLK way more credit

He would have accomplished the same; he did not need Malcolm in the background threatening violent revolution.

[bravenak]

146. I don't give white folks that much credit to do it without Malcolm.

It ain't Martin that was the problem. It was white society that was the problem.

[treestar]

142. +1

Keep the high ground.

the riots only give complacent white people the chance to use the riots to affirm their prejudices.

[marym625]

19. many kids were involved in the uprising

And it was the police that caused it. I am sure you know this since you felt compelled to chastise a woman that was obviously very upset and scared.

[libdem4life]

145. Agree, Bullshit. Most of these kids were there because the police had locked down their school

buses. Don't hear much about that. It was a long tweet from one of the teachers. They couldn't even get home.

[sabrina 1]

15. Thank you, I was about to say that, you saved me the trouble.

As someone said today, these are the children who have been marginalized by this society and to call them 'thugs' is reprehensible.

In an equitable society they would be included. But it isn't and they aren't.

I am shocked at the lack of awareness of what has been going on in this country frankly.

I wonder how these critics would manage if they found themselves in the position these children and their parents, are in?

I'm thinking, not very well.

[Yavin4]

44. Your point would make sens if...

the majority of the kids in Baltimore were rioting which it was not. How do you explain the hundreds of thousands of kids who stayed home and did not riot? Stop excusing poor behavior.

[sabrina 1]

57. I just explained it. If you want to ignore the racism, the lack of opportunity, education, jobs, the

murders by cops in Baltimore and in so many other cities around the country, you are free to do so.

There should be no poor in this obscenely wealthy country. And there should be no marginalizing of US Citizens because of their ethnicity, there should NOT be, but there is, that is a fact. And if you grow up knowing you are regarded as less than others and you see your community being brutalized by the very people who are supposed to protect you, if you are without hope, and all the peaceful protesting, the injustices, the attempts to get justice, fail, as you see it, it should not be surprising that this will happen.

And I'm not condoning it, but I am understanding it.

Same attitude in Britain when the pressure finally erupted in riots. Blindness towards what contributed to it.

[JDPriestly]

83. Yes. But the violence of the rioters contributes to the avoidance of the

essential problems of racism and poverty. That is why when people decide to demonstrate, even if the demonstration is quite spontaneous, they need to be trained in nonviolent resistance. As Bravenak pointed out, the police instigate the violence on the part of the demonstrators. Add to that the fact that many of the demonstrators are undisciplined and have not been taught self-control and on top of that the knowledge of the police about how to anger demonstrators, and you have an explosive situation.

Demonstrators need to be reminded that they are there to achieve change and to focus the public attention on police violence, not to make the police look like the victims. When they make the police and the business owners look like victims, they distract from the real criminals -- certain of the police themselves.

[LittleBlue]

77. Bingo

If black Baltimoreans had reasonable employment opportunities, their frustration would manifest peacefully. If the police treated them humanely, they'd have no initial reason to riot anyway.

[bravenak]

159. Hell yeah.

Yep.

[phil89]

179. Oh I'm sure businesses will be rushing

to invest in the community now! Such a lack of common sense here is surprising.

[L0oniX]

114. Apparently some seem to have forgotten about those white people riots after the sports games.

[bravenak]

125. Those are just celebrations!!!!! No RIOTS! Only black people riot.

White people simply enjoy a nice fire when their team wins. It's purely for aesthetics.

[Hekate]

4. Unrec

[Number23]

72. + like, everything

God, this place...

[freshwest]

84. +2. Can't believe the utter outrage at this after...

Last edited Wed Apr 29, 2015, 08:02 AM - Edit history (1)

Oh, no, let's not talk about that! Let's talk about a BLACK PERSON doing something WRONG!

While a black man is killed every 28 minutes in this country, the nation sleeps...

Just read this until it sinks in folks:

Freddie Gray from Baltimore, who despite committing no crime, was taken into custody and savagely beaten by the police until they severed his spine in three places and collapsed his voice box, only to die in agony seven days later?

severed his spine in three places and collapsed his voice box, only to die in agony seven days later

severed his spine in three places and collapsed his voice box, only to die in agony seven days later

severed his spine in three places and collapsed his voice box, only to die in agony seven days later

severed his spine in three places and collapsed his voice box, only to die in agony seven days later

severed his spine in three places and collapsed his voice box, only to die in agony seven days later

severed his spine in three places and collapsed his voice box, only to die in agony seven days later

severed his spine in three places and collapsed his voice box, only to die in agony seven days later

severed his spine in three places and collapsed his voice box, only to die in agony seven days later

severed his spine in three places and collapsed his voice box, only to die in agony seven days later

Priorities, people!

[ann---]

127. We can talk about both

[treestar]

144. Yep.

The internet sure knows how to move on to the next "outrage." No matter how trivial compared to the really outrageous event.

[Orsino]

103. Yeah. Baltimore wasn't built last week.

There's blame enough for every one of us who failed to build a just society.

A kid running off to join--or even just to watch--one of the last avenues for change still possible is completely understandable, as is the panic of a parent who knows her child isn't immortal.

[steve2470]

109. me too! nt

[MaggieD]

5. She is clearly frustrated in that video

And I am sure, in fear for her child. Are you a mother? I think it's hard to describe how much a mother can fear for her child in certain situations. I'm not going to judge her.

As for rioting, meh. If the kid is normal for his age he probably does not have deep seated political beliefs about injustice. He may be just wanting to get involved in a riot for the experience. Kids do stuff like that. No matter how fantastic their parents are.

But, I am not surprised that people are fed up enough to riot. I mean these cops are killing people for no reason. And POC have put up with serious police harassment for decades. At some point it boils over. It just has to at some point.

Hell, we started a revolutionary war based on less than POC have had to go through. I don't find it surprising that it is boiling over, and I sure as hell am not going to condemn them.

[cherokeeprogressive]

6. No judgment from me. What I saw though was a Mother who was maybe afraid for her Son's safety.

[akbacchus_BC]

11. Holy moly, you remind me of myself! We do say stupid things

whilst inebriated. Got to be more careful in future, lol.

[vanlassie]

28. ROFL!

[akbacchus_BC]

36. You made my night, thank you!

I do type stupid shit when am frustrated but I promise to be more careful in the future.

I love DU and it is the best ever for Democrats/Progressives to share their points of view.

[delrem]

9. Is this entered in the "who can post the uliest OP?" contest? nt

[R. Daneel Olivaw]

53. Sounds like it.

[akbacchus_BC]

10. Are you a parent? Parents give birth to their children!

Parents do not control what their children do. When children get together it is a different story!

Please go vomit whilst we converse!

[lumberjack_jeff]

14. Only half of them do. n/t

[akbacchus_BC]

20. Which half.? You Americans confuse me, man!

I love you all though but not republicans!

[seabeyond]

31. you said parents give birth. he says only half. meaning the women. not the men.

and there you go.

ya. silly american, huh?

[akbacchus_BC]

40. Oh Sea, no, why are you focusing on something that I did not mean.

[seabeyond]

60. i know you did not mean that. i was just telling you what jeff meant by half. half of the parents

give birth. of course you did not mean both father and mother give birth.

he was being silly.

[akbacchus_BC]

27. I think you responded to the wrong person and

then I responded to you.

I am still waiting for Yavin's response!

[lumberjack_jeff]

124. Dads don't give birth. Yet, shocking as it may sound, they are parents. n/t

Last edited Wed Apr 29, 2015, 01:31 PM - Edit history (1)

[Yavin4]

29. So, it's all a crap shoot?

Parenting has nothing to do with it. Message received.

[akbacchus_BC]

45. Nobody said that parenting is not important!

When the scale is against a certain group of people, and the police is shooting blacks left right and centre, you expect them to sit down and take that shit forever? No. Canadians riot after their team lost a game, and that is not effing civil rights.

Buddy, you need to get your ducks in line and your perspective in order. What blacks are saying is enough is enough. Please stop killing us! Is that so hard to understand?

Which pedestal you standing on that you think you can lecture to us?

[WillowTree]

12. How many kids do you have? How many who always do EVERYTHING exactly as you taught them?

Yeah. I thought so.

[underahedgerow]

47. Right? Because teenage kids always use great judgement and never, ever do stupid things

even when raised by the very best parents!

FFS judging this woman on one minute in her life is despicable. We don't know her, we don't know her son or their circumstances. We know one minute out of their life where she took control and knocked that kid up side the head to save his life. If my kid made that kind of BIG mistake, you can sure as hell bet that I, who have never, ever raised a hand to my child or anyone else, ever, would knock my kid up side the head if I caught her doing such stupid, stupid shit like this.

People of all types, mentalities & cultures get caught up in the heat of mob mentality. Kids sneaking off to join the army when their country is at war, villagers with their pitchforks to chase down the witches, 'mob mentality' is a fever that can grip a person leaving them irrational and feeling all powerful.

Is she a bad person? Is her son a bad person? We don't know, but I do appreciate a desperate, angry and ashamed mother doing the best she can for her kid in one single moment, in the most horrific situation imaginable, so just leave it alone until you've been in her shoes. We have no right to judge her entire life on this one single incident.

Damn. Anyone criticizing her and judging her should be ashamed of themselves. Knock it off and find something more important to do with your time.

[MaggieD]

51. Well said

[AgingAmerican]

63. I was a monster when I was a teenager

Ran away, stole cars, did drugs, robbed parking meters, squatted in abandoned buildings. Endless stupidity. I was a rotten teenager.

All the other kids in my family were normal teens. I survived it and ended up doing just fine.

[Hekate]

66. Blistering reply -- and spot on. That's a real mother bear, there. nt

[PADemD]

112. Agree

[WillowTree]

118. Oh Lord! I was a major pain in the youknowwhat as a teen.

To be honest, there are times I consider myself lucky that my parents allowed me to live to adulthood.

That woman has 7 children and he is her only son. He's obviously living in an environment where it would be easy for him to take an unhappy path if his parents don't keep him on a fairly short leash. I've heard her speak. This is a very smart lady.......and wise, too, if you catch the difference. She did what she needed to do to extricate her son from a situation that was dangerous for a multitude of reasons. I applaud her. Loudly.

[Spider Jerusalem]

13. Sorry, but if America did its job as a society people wouldn't be rioting in the streets!

Fixed that for you.

[steve2470]

110. agreed

You are undoubtedly one of the very most intelligent posters on DU, bar none. Yes, I'm being sincere.

[NOLALady]

16. Interesting POV.

The way that I see it, the parents of the police had to be disasters. They raised their children to believe that murder is OK. But, at least they taught them to not riot.

[Yavin4]

30. Not defending the police nor the idiotic drug war

This is a separate issue.

[raouldukelives]

138. Hey, no room for common sense here. nt

[TheKentuckian]

17. Huge leap of logic combined with a deep misunderstanding of humanity

Guess what? Sometimes incredibly bad parents have wonderful kids and vice versa.

Further, all kinds of kids do all kinds of stupid shit and it doesn't even mean they are bad kids.

I'm thinking either the weighting, the diversity, the depth, focus, or all of the above of your sample of humans and the shit they do has to be fucked up to even say something like that.

[Yavin4]

32. Own the failure.

Your logic misses the point that there are good parents whose kids stayed home. Those are the parents we should be celebrating not her.

[TheKentuckian]

65. I'm not celebrating anyone. Who is we? I'm saying you seem to have a skewed view

of magic parenting.

Again, some of the shittiest parents ever have produced wonderful children and vice versa. Everytime someone does something wrong it doesn't mean they are holistically bad nor are all the kids who stayed out this trouble going to be wonderful going forward.

Are you seriously trying to say in your travels through life you've never met a good parent with a bad seed of a kid? Never seen a kid with awful parents that was good as gold? Never known anyone particularly young people that behaved badly but we're generally good?

BULLSHIT or get out of your house and your head. Talk to some people. Get our of your bubble.

[backscatter712]

18. Oh joy, another sanctimonious lecture directed at Those People.

[akbacchus_BC]

23. I think Yavin missed his calling!

Probably somewhere out there giving out flyers for Jehovah Witness. I could be wrong!

[Yavin4]

42. If by "Those People", you mean awful parents.

Yes, I am sanctimonious. Beating your kids teaches them a behavior that they will carry with them in life.

[G_j]

22. for your consideration,

Baltimore teachers and parents tell a different story from the one you've been reading in the media."

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10026585697

[beam me up scottie]

24. Pfft.

Speaking of things that make me want to vomit...


Unrec.

[Yavin4]

39. When you read stories of spousal and child abuse...

you now know where this behavior is learned.

[beam me up scottie]

43. Get a grip.

You're just making shit up to defend your witch hunt.

Again, pffft.

[Yavin4]

46. And you have no counter to my argument

Other than a b.s. dismissal.

[beam me up scottie]

50. What argument?

You saw one short video and made it your mission to smear a woman that you know nothing about.

You're a self-righteous prig who deserves much more than I'm allowed to post here.

[marym625]

55. +1

[Hassin Bin Sober]

89. +1

[newfie11]

99. +1

[TheSarcastinator]

162. "self-righteous prig" is exactly correct

So much pearl clutching, finger waving and sermonizing is difficult to bear.

[akbacchus_BC]

58. Shakes my head!

You are unbelievable incoherent. Can some one be so stupid? Never try to be on Jeopardy or Wheel of Fortune, you will be a loser!

[beam me up scottie]

67. I think that ship has sailed.

They're already a loser, yanno what I mean?

[Hekate]

148. When your toddler lets go of your hand and steps into the traffic...

...do you squat down in the traffic with them to have a reasoned conversation?

Or do you dodge in front of the cars yourself and grab that child so fast it makes their little head spin? And deliver a swat on the bottom to drive the point home because you yourself are about to vomit from terror?

Teenagers, especially boys, are risk-prone. That mother in the yellow blouse must have been out of her mind with fear that her boy was going to end up dead in the street.

To say I relate is an understatement. I tried to tell my husband about the incident this morning and suddenly I was choking with tears, as I am now.

How dare you judge that mother.

[seabeyond]

25. how very naive. ya. easy for my kids. dont i get to pat me on the back. whole stories you missed

in your very naive conclusion.

[Yavin4]

34. Again, it' acceptable for African American kids to riot. Check.

It's acceptable to beat and humiliate a young African American male in public. Check. Got it. Let's throw her a victory parade why don't we?

Here's something else to think about. How will this young man view women as he gets older? When you read stories about men abusing their wives and their children, where do you think they learn this behavior?

[beam me up scottie]

56. Straw man.

Faux concern for Those People - check

[seabeyond]

62. first part of your post you make shit up to give me. how dishonest.

you ignore so much of what these people are actually living that now i am going to back away. i cant hardly stomach your rigid inability to delve beyond your own motives in this post.

so go at it yavin.

i think your posts is as low as i have seen on du in quite a while.

[L0oniX]

113. To be fair ...it IS ok for white kids to riot after losing a hockey game.

[seabeyond]

132. she has 6 kids, who knows their circumstance and lives. we get 1 minute of their lives.

and then we tell the story.

i find that highly irresponsible, unreasonable, foolish and blind.

some people need to be able to rigidly define their world for comfort.

i am good with not living in that rigidity.

[L0oniX]

133. I guess I should have added a sarc tag.

I hate how the media is playing this ...it's so hypocritical. If it's white kids rioting after a hockey game it's # ...if its's black kids rioting after someone gets killed by a cop then it's *

[seabeyond]

134. ya. i pretty much figured you were being sarcastic, though not way sure. i was more using your post

cause i am just really bothered the attitude and what i am hearing in this thread, as a parent of two teenage boys.

[JayhawkSD]

33. I feel sorry for that kid.

Being cowed and intimidated, beaten up in public by his mother. The next time he shows up in school the treatment by his schoolmates is going to be brutal. He is going to be hating his mother with a bitter hatred while the other boys are mocking him and laughing at him.

Sorry, I cannot see that as good parenting. That is an awful way to treat your kid in public.

[Yavin4]

37. If anyone crosses his path in the future...

He will resort to how he was raised and use these same tactics on strangers in the street. He will have no problem doing so.

[justiceischeap]

90. ^ That right there is bullshit

There are plenty of people in this world that were abused as children that do not grow up to be abusers. We don't even know if this kid in the video is "abused" on a regular basis. For all we know, this is the first time this mother whacked her son upside his head.

You can have your opinions on her parenting skills but you cannot make such a blanket statement about child abuse and how people grow up out of that.

[PADemD]

117. That mother saved her son from getting wacked upside the head with a billy club.

[JayhawkSD]

129. Which he might prefer...

...compared to the brutal treatment he is going to get every single day from his street peers.

[arthritisR_US]

173. She may have prevented him from having his neck broken. I think her

terror of that potential outcome is what drove her reaction. Fear for those you love most dearly can drive extreme reactions, like those when a person lifts a car off of a dear one. It is far too easy to condemn another's parenting.

[ann---]

128. I agree with you 100%

The same people who believe the cops are wrong for beating
people on the head think it's okay for a mother to do it.
Violence breeds more violence. She was wrong.

[JayhawkSD]

131. Excellent point.

"The same people who believe the cops are wrong for beating
people on the head think it's okay for a mother to do it."

[arthritisR_US]

174. Poor comparison, the motivations for each are totally different. nt

[JayhawkSD]

182. Which is precisely what makes it so idiotic and hilarious. nt

[Lil Missy]

35. Pretty judgemental. And, what are your credentials to declare who is or who isn't a good parent?

She probably wants to protect her son, maybe even save his life. I didn't see her hurt him.

If I had a son who joined in with a bunch of thugs, thieves and rock throwers, I'd chase his ass home too.

[Yavin4]

38. My credentials? Common fucking sense.

Yes, I am judging her. She's a terrible parent and should not be celebrated.

[Lil Missy]

41. Common Sense? Apparently NOT!!

And your mother smells of elderberries. So there.

[akbacchus_BC]

49. You have no common sense, you talking side ways

out of your mouth! We understand, folks like you like to see folks like us being killed! Did you have a thrill?

Some of you on here make black people go away, because it is not a forum that respects us. DU will survive with dicks like you.

[R. Daneel Olivaw]

48. Do you have children? Are they clones? Do they have free will?

It doesn't matter how good a parent you are. Kids will do what they think is right; sometimes against the better nature of reason.

Don't judge too harshly the child or the parent.

The kid will learn with luck.

[akbacchus_BC]

54. You know what, it is not about the parents!

It is how children react when they are in a group. I never would have thought that a group of kids would kill a child in BC and deny it! We give birth to our children but then they get lost if we do not do good parenting and ensure that values should be respected. What are those values? Be kind, be respectful, etc.

For me, if my girls came home late, I would never say you cannot come home and we live to see that a parent in Toronto who turned her child out, got kidnapped by Bernardo and his wife and eventually killed.

Children will rebel but as parents, home is home, that is their sanctuary!

[Rex]

59. Yavin4...

[Arugula Latte]

64. If you did your job as a parent, your cop kid would NOT be breaking spines and shooting unarmed

black people!!!

[Hekate]

73. That oughta burn. Deeply. nt

[6000eliot]

68. You need to study group dynamics.

Most people who wind up in a riot never intended to do so.

[arthritisR_US]

175. Excellent and astute! nt

[killbotfactory]

69. To imagine: children have a mind and will of their own, and do things you don't like...

and that frustrates the hell out of you because you are sacrificing your life treading against water to try and make sure they have a better life than you do...

nah, could never happen

[gwheezie]

70. didn't like the beat down but understood the fear

That woman did not want her son to be the next dead child at the hands of the police. She wanted to get him out if there.
Kids do all kinds of reckless things no matter who raised them. I feel bad that the media exploited this.

[beam me up scottie]

71. I take it you didn't watch Larry Wilmore's Nightly Show.

He had on an advocate for the "Civil Unrest Mom Movement"



Does he make you want to vomit too?

[A-Schwarzenegger]

74. Sorry, but I wouldn't blame your parents for your OP.

[Guy Whitey Corngood]

130. .

.

[Scootaloo]

75. I'm sure she will take your opinion into consideration.

[LittleBlue]

76. Disagree. Parents can completely devote themselves to achieving an outcome and still fail

I hope that the young man let his emotions get the better of him and made an uncharacteristic mistake. There is no evidence to suggest anything beyond a lapse in judgment caused by peer pressure and intense emotions

[Wash. state Desk Jet]

78. Gee Whiz

Seemed to be more of a reflection of some seriously strong parenting. To the bottom line I think the point was is reversed actually.
You see in facing imminent disaster a quick thinking fast acting mother/parent, got her siblings out of there.
Her actions speak volumes.

The woman is no disaster and what she did is the right thing to do.

[JDPriestly]

79. Right.

I understand the anger. But the problem with the violence, the destruction of property, is that it encourages those who do not want to face the horrible crimes of police violence to shift the blame for violence to the so-called rioters.

The violence by demonstrators against police violence is a very stupid tactic. The violence by demonstrators distracts the attention of the public from the really serious problem of the police killing unarmed black people.

It is counter-productive to let one's anger give the press and some of the authorities the opportunity to distract attention from the real problem: police violence and failure to punish police officers who kill unarmed people and use excessive force.

Everyone needs to be non-violent.

[tazkcmo]

86. Mine would.

Because I taught him to fight for justice.

[JI7]

87. too simplistic

[SoCalDem]

88. There comes a time in most kids' lives, when

parents' wishes are on the back burner, and peer pressure/support is almighty.

Not ALL kids feel this way, but many kids rebel with a vigor, and no matter how "good" the parents/family are, there is no stopping them..

We had a rebel child, who fortunately managed to grow up and out grow his misdeeds.. and he was lucky enough to have committed his law breaking while he was a minor..:whew!!!

He cost us a FORTUNE...but he ended up giving us our one and only grandchild.. well worth the trouble he caused us...

[hobbit709]

91. If there is that amount of injustice going on, your kids SHOULD be in the streets

And you along with them.

[Katashi_itto]

92. Naive simplistic pap.

From someone who obviously is overestimating their intelligence.

[TexasProgresive]

93. To judge a parent by the actions of a child or vice versa

is really disingenuous. This woman may be a bad parent but you don't have enough evidence to make any kind of rational judgement. We have 4 sons and each one is different. All have done things that make us happy and other things that make us sad. Are we completely responsible for the good that they do or the bad?

One of our sons, the same age as this kid got drunk with a friend who then had an accident. I don't know why the PD didn't charge them but they were transported to the local hospital. When I arrived I could hear our son shouting loudly at the receptionist and everyone else. I was so outraged at his behavior that I drug him bodily out of the emergency room and lifted him off his feet up against a wall. I did not hit him. I don't know why, but I read him the riot act in that calm cold voice that seems to get more attention than screaming. I was unaware that we had and audience until I let him down and they applauded.

The behavior of this son was typical for him but not his brothers. So I guess Mom and I failed him and did right by his brothers as you would judge.

[Fumesucker]

94. Children are like a box of chocolates

You never know what you are going to get.

Sometimes you get the reasonable kid who goes along with the program and sometimes you get the rebellious kid from hell, they can even change back and forth from one to the other.

Bear in mind that in our culture a kid who is smart but growing up in an underprivileged society can easily see good reason not to accept the status quo, to be rebellious.

[demmiblue]

96. +1

[LiberalElite]

95. That horse you're on is pretty dmn high nt

[dembotoz]

97. I would hope my kids were at the protest and I would hope the would avoid the riot

There is some bad crap going on in our cities

[newfie11]

98. Until you walk in this woman's shoes

Seen what she has seen and knowing full well her BLACK child could be shot by police without provocation, I would not judge.
She may have saved his life.

[liberal N proud]

100. That momma just was trying to save her baby from the street

And don't try and tell me that that young man isn't a baby because I will guarantee you that the mother sees him as her baby weather he is her first, third or fifth child.

Her response is appropriate and should be a lesson to many who just let their kids run wild. There needs to be some accountability and it does start at home.

[CanadaexPat]

102. If you did your job, they would be...nt

[99Forever]

104. Great to finally get to meet the one parent who raised perfect children!

You are truly fucking awesome!

[ohnoyoudidnt]

147. I'm not sure if the OP even has kids.

I don't see any mention of it in this thread. As a kid I did things what were wrong despite my parents talking to me about the right things to do. I did get smacked a few times as a kid and I have never used violence to solve problems with other adults. And nearly everyone has done things as a kid that they know their parents s would not approve.

[gollygee]

105. Thanks for letting us all know you don't have any kids

Because if you had kids, at least over the age of about 3 or 4, you'd realize you can't actually control everything they do. If you had a teenager, you'd realize that no matter how hard you try to teach them right from wrong, their peers have a lot of influence on them and things still won't necessarily turn out how you want.

[fadedrose]

106. If you're talking about the lady

who went to the crowed, dragged her son out, chewed him out , and took him home, I think she's marvelous.

When I was growing up, there were no riots, just a feeling of togetherness because I was born in '38 and we had WWII to worry about, plus parents getting over the depression.

In these days of 1% wealth who have everything you can think of, you also have gangs who are also in the 1%, except it's the lowest 1%. Mothers and fathers of today have to make themselves look more desirable than the gangs who are recruiting their children.

Wise up. This lady needs YOUR support, and if all the mothers of ALL the gang members had her courage, there would be no gangs..

[Erich Bloodaxe BSN]

107. Was there actually any video that showed that her son was 'rioting'?

There were plenty of protesters out on the streets as well, and the simple fact that he was dressed 'anonymously' doesn't tell me that he was actually doing anything illegal. Being a protester of injustice is nothing to be ashamed of.

[CTyankee]

108. Exactly! We don't know diddly about what their individual situation was.

Kids that age "dress up" for things and for all we know she was saying "Don't even THINK about doing bad stuff!" And then was reeling him back in...

[bigwillq]

111. I disagree.

I can't say if she is a great mother or not, since I don't know her, but sometimes parents can't control what their kids do.

[brooklynite]

115. How does the kid "stay in the house"

The kid was in school. The mother was probably at work. The protests (especially the violent ones), were organized by the students after they got out of school.

[L0oniX]

116. ...and for those white kids that riot after a hockey game?

Yea that's what I thought. Hypocrisy gone wild.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

136. There were only two major riots after hockey games

Same city, in Canada about 17 years apart.

I know, I know, hockey = white people and all....

[L0oniX]

169. Sorry you didn't get it.

It's not just hockey.

http://www.wired.com/2012/04/kentucky-wins-but-students-lose-in-basketball-riot-photos/

It happens after sports games period. When white people do it it ain't nothin. When it's blacks then it's major national news. Fuck the racist media.

[ProudToBeBlueInRhody]

172. Los Angeles and Dallas have had riots after the Lakers and Cowboys won their championships

Were those all white people?

They got the same amount of coverage as the one in Kentucky. A couple of days of "Isn't that awful" and they move on. Sports riots are a one night thing. I agree these riots get the media far more riled up because of all the shit connected to it.

[malaise]

119. What if the kid could not get home from school because they stopped the buses

at the same time they closed down the schools.

[Starry Messenger]

120. Oh lord.

[liberal_at_heart]

121. You don't know anything about that mother or the circumstances in which she finds herself.

[ann---]

126. I agree

She should have been arrested for assault. When cops
hit a suspect in the head and keep beating on him, that is
not acceptable (of course it isn't). When a mother does it
it is not acceptable either. It is violence. She is not teaching
her son anything except that she believes violence is the
answer to a problem. She is wrong.

[Yavin4]

150. Thank you for the support

I'm getting blasted here but I am standing my ground. I don't think that she should be celebrated as "Mom of the Year" like so many others here want to do.

[pipi_k]

135. I had mixed feelings after seeing that

I didn't think it was cool of her to go off on the kid and beat him about the head, but...

At least she came out and GOT her kid off the streets.


As for equating a kid's being out with a wild gang of rioters and looters with his mom's parenting skills, that doesn't even make sense.

Especially if you pay attention to what others who posted in this thread about group dynamics and peer pressure. How easy it is for kids, especially, to be present in a situation with only the intent to watch, but then somehow get caught up in the rising emotions.


I don't think there's a parent in this country who knows every single thing his/her kid is up to at every moment of the day.

Kids are stupid. They do stupid things, even with the best of parents.


And unless you've been there yourself you have no idea what that mom must have been feeling at the time. Angry. Embarrassed. And possibly even scared to death that her kid could have gotten injured or killed.

Raising kids is one of the hardest jobs in the world.

[Pisces]

139. Don't judge things you don't understand.

[fredamae]

151. ^^^This^^^ n/t

[Gormy Cuss]

152. It's pretty hard to stay in the house when the buses set to take you there are blocked by the cops.

I don't defend the mother's use of physical violence but I have no doubt that my own mother would have responded the same way out of fear and frustration, and we were taught to keep our noses clean, walk away, and all the other good lessons needed to survive in a long income community.

[notadmblnd]

153. you know, I managed to raise my son without striking him

and I would expect that he would not participate in the destruction of other people's property. However, if I did find him engaging in that behavior with his friends, he would not be the only one in the bunch that would be shamed and marched/chased back home by me. Although I'd probably do it with out the hitting.

I'm not gonna judge, laud or speak badly of the woman. I know some of these kids out there are down right shameless despite how well of a job a parent has tried to do raising them.

[fredamae]

154. I would have done the same

thing to my 16 year old....any one of the 3 (Plus) boys I raised. Damn straight. And of course it is known that these kids....likely That kid was let off one of the school buses that was held up by the protesters right? They let the kids out in the midst of it.

Frankly, What the mom did (what I would do is) was Way better than a bullet in his back.

[Tom Ripley]

156. WTF? Where is the UNREC button?

[jwirr]

157. I can just see the rw saying that to the parents of all the protesters in the 60s.

[libdem4life]

160. The kids were trapped. They were pulled off their buses and had no way to leave.

http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2015/04/how-baltimore-riots-began-mondawmin-purge

This is a disaster as a judgmental Monday Morning Quarterback posting.

[TheSarcastinator]

161. this type of self-righteous indignation is pathetic

You do not know this woman, her family or her history -- you are not fit nor qualified to judge her.

[lostnfound]

166. I am a terrible parent! How do I quit this job and find another one?

I try but I just can't get it right. My teenage son doesn't listen, I work full time, I have six doctor referrals for myself that have been neglected for eight months because my job and my son are higher priorities.

Thank god he's growing up in a white bread suburb where the cops aren't likely to shoot him and my job pays well enough that I only have ONE full time job to work because it's already hard enough after my long commute to get home in time to cook dinner AND get through homework.

Yep. I suck as a parent. Too bad I didn't know that 14 years ago. Zero to ten? Piece of cake. But I am NOT cut out for raising a teenage boy. Got some suggestions? Cuz the rest of the world is always offering plenty (from the cheap seats).

I suck as a parent. He has ten or twelve behavior problems that appeared since puberty hit. I work on one or two at a time and feel like I'm being hit with a tsunami.

[A-Schwarzenegger]

170. Good post.

Thank you. You sound like a great parent.

[arthritisR_US]

176. I truly hope you are careful because the air up there can be very

thin resulting in you getting very dizzy and falling off that perch...you could hurt yourself. Come down from there, walk a mile in her shoes and please don't choke on your sanctimonious judgements.

[sub.theory]

177. Completely Disagree

Look, kids rebel. They disobey their parents. This is extremely common. Especially when peer pressure is in play. Add in strong emotions and you easily have what we see here. A young man who disobeyed his mother, made a bad choice, and her correcting him for it.

[Barack_America]

178. Are you a Duggar? Were you homeschooled?

I'm trying to figure out how you can have such an unrealistic view of teenagers, given that you were presumably one. I can only imagine you lived a profoundly sheltered childhood, a childhood vastly divergent to the experience of most teenagers, especially black teenagers.

You certainly have never been the mother of a societally-disposable black teenage boy, nor a mother watching her son be one rock throw away from death or potentially a lifetime of incarceration.

She went down there in the midst of danger to find him, hard to interpret that as anything other than love.

[sheshe2]

180. So...

You are her judge and jury? You came back with a guilty on all charges. Sadly you are misinformed. You wrote a story and made judgement on it, all from a 2 minute clip?

[Doctor_J]

181. I don't understand why she wouldn't just grab his arm and walk briskly away from the trouble

I have not been in such a precarious spot, but wailing on the son seems useless

[Quantess]

183. How about blaming the father for a change?

Where was he?

[Quantess]

184. How about blaming the father for a change?

Where was he?

[WinkyDink]

188. Totally disagree.

[Snow Leopard]

189. I disagree. Nt.