Trip to Olive Garden lands alleged dealer in jail

[The Straight Story]

ROSWELL, Ga. – What should have been an easy food order from Olive Garden Feb. 15 turned into a major bust for police, after a man was arrested for dealing drugs.

...

Employees told police Perez was wearing a baseball cap low on his brow and wearing glasses, all of which hid his face. While he was waiting for his food, Perez went to the restroom, where employees noticed him peek out to see if anyone was watching. At this point, employees said they suspected Perez would try and rob the business, and the manager loudly called out that the police should be arriving soon.

Perez quickly paid for his food. As he was leaving, he was allegedly seen taking several knives and forks from a table and possibly a bottle of salad dressing.

When Perez finally left the restaurant, police were waiting for him. He admitted to taking the silverware. When asked about the salad dressing, Perez denied taking it.

When police asked to look through his car for the missing dressing, Perez allegedly became very nervous. A search of his car turned up a trove of narcotics and other illegal drugs and paraphernalia, including digital scales and glass pipes, as well as dozens of bags of suspected marijuana, cocaine, methamphetamine and psychedelic mushrooms.

http://www.northfulton.com/articles-c-2012-02-23-191768.114126-trip-to-olive-garden-lands-alleged-dealer-in-jail.html

[bigwillq]

1. So maybe that's why that Radio woman liked OG so much

[jberryhill]

2. But did they find the salad dressing?

[pinboy3niner]

4. He didn't do it--the dressing was Rushin'

And it's prob'ly far away by now.

[jberryhill]

6. ...probably on one of a thousand islands

But it might have been an unlawful search and Caesar.

[pinboy3niner]

10. I suspect the dressing headed to Catalina

Possibly on a refugee visa.

[jberryhill]

14. Naw, it's relaxing on a ranch in a hidden valley

It was Paul Newman's own ranch, in his salad days.

[Warren DeMontague]

13. You are going to burn in hell

for that little vinaigrette.

[jberryhill]

15. Please, stop with the crudities

[pinboy3niner]

16. Lettuce not ban olive 'em just 'cause you're nettled

Parsnips we could tolerate a few?

[jberryhill]

18. If its okra with you, then it's okra with me

But enough of this chive talk, you unsavory rapscallion.

[pinboy3niner]

19. I wouldn't turnip my nose at a deal

We should have some tolerance a mung us. No more casting asparagus.

And, btw, flattery will get you nowhere.

[jberryhill]

20. I think we should turn over a new leaf

Because we tossed out all the good ones and are scraping the bottom of the bowl.

[pinboy3niner]

25. Our bowl must have sprung a leek

It's fast becoming arugula dead endive here. But I shallot weep, as I'm getting sleepy anyway.

[pipoman]

3. Did the dealer have a pitbull?

[Eleanors38]

23. Yes, it was reading an extended magazine.

[bluestate10]

5. Dumbass. Way to get noticed, moron. At some time during the long prison sentence the

bonehead is going to get, he may realize that wearing a low hanging cap and sunglasses into an eating place wasn't a good idea.

[Incitatus]

9. Neither was stealing a few dollars worth of utensils when you have hundreds, maybe thousands

of dollars worth of drugs in your car.

[pinboy3niner]

12. When you're having a big dinner party and you're short a few place settings...

...it's common to get a little panicky.

[Eleanors38]

24. Probably did that as a matter of principle.

[Captain Stern]

7. This guy pretty much hit for the cycle...

...he fucked up almost every way he could.

1. Went into the restaurant looking like he was hiding his face.
2. Aroused the suspicion of employees by acting like he was casing the place.
3. After he was called out, and given a chance to leave....steals some stuff.
4. Admits the theft to the police (except for the salad dressing, wtf?)....and then apparently gives them permission to search his car

I'm guessing he was using more of his product than he was selling.

[hfojvt]

8. "Olive Garden, we're all family here"

Yes, I remember the family dinners we had growing up. My parents called the cops on us all the time.

Well, if they had, they could have made a strong case for "disturbing the peace" or, worse yet, something like Deuteronomy 21: 18.

[KinMd]

11. If stupidity was a crime....

this guy would get life with no parole

[bobduca]

17. For some inexplicable reason the police called it

operation mind crime

[PD Turk]

21. Incomplete story

A story about Olive Garden and it didn't mention anything about the breastfeeding pitbulls?

[denem]

22. Mushrooms to go; Would you like Coke or Ice with your order?

No, just breast milk.

[TeeYiYi]

26. Thanks, no. I have coke and ice in my car.

TYY

[pinboy3niner]

27. The first thing the cops asked...

[center]U TENSILE BRO?

[/center]