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sheshe2

(83,347 posts)
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 05:31 PM Mar 2020

Let this sink in.

Two hours ago I was watching CNN with Brianna Keillor. She was talking about the death toll here in the US, then 1067. She was saying there would be One Thousand Sixty Seven funerals, that no one would be able to attend. 1067 people died without a loved one beside them, because they were not allowed. The virus is highly contagious.

Their last days of life were surrounded by strangers, albeit caring ones that have been working around the clock to save them.

I can't imagine the pain of a loved one dying and not be able to say goodbye.



Since that broadcast two hours ago the death count rose by 100 to 1161. Two hours, that is all it took.

I can't even.

49 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Let this sink in. (Original Post) sheshe2 Mar 2020 OP
The idea that people cannot gather to memorialize their loved one mcar Mar 2020 #1
Yes, mcar. sheshe2 Mar 2020 #5
That is one of the worst things about this. Initech Mar 2020 #42
And while this is happening, Trump is trying to convince his followers that it is NOT happening. guillaumeb Mar 2020 #2
Anyone from MS from this moment on should NOT be allowed to go into any Eliot Rosewater Mar 2020 #6
It is insanity. guillaumeb Mar 2020 #7
And rump and the GOP are doing everything they can NOT to send equipment and to get Eliot Rosewater Mar 2020 #3
Even worse, holding back aid for ass kissing the monster? Brainfodder Mar 2020 #9
"Two hours, that is all it took" jberryhill Mar 2020 #4
Many, perhaps most people, are math illiterates. guillaumeb Mar 2020 #11
yesterday handmade34 Mar 2020 #8
We buried my father in law a week ago. MontanaMama Mar 2020 #10
I am so sorry for your loss, MM. sheshe2 Mar 2020 #12
Deepest sympathy malaise Mar 2020 #25
I'm sorry to hear this. calimary Mar 2020 #30
I like that idea calimary. MontanaMama Mar 2020 #32
Hugs back atcha, MontanaMama! calimary Mar 2020 #34
And I don't think the Covidiot in Chief has expressed one word of sympathy tanyev Mar 2020 #13
Covidiot in Chief! calimary Mar 2020 #35
No, a sociopath like him is incapable of it. Initech Mar 2020 #43
It would be bad for anyone to have to go through this alone blueinredohio Mar 2020 #14
Largely because One. Dipshit-In-Chief must have his ego stroked. lastlib Mar 2020 #15
By Easter Sunday this country will be reeling. CrispyQ Mar 2020 #16
The churches will be packed Easter Traildogbob Mar 2020 #21
I fear you are right. -nt CrispyQ Mar 2020 #39
Most of the funerals have been cancelled Mariana Mar 2020 #17
And the death and infection rate is going to get far worse PufPuf23 Mar 2020 #18
Meanwhile Don the Con and Mother's Boy malaise Mar 2020 #19
It will get much worse... lefthandedskyhook Mar 2020 #20
And they kept warning us. sheshe2 Mar 2020 #22
There was a good article in the Boston Globe on this topic today. smirkymonkey Mar 2020 #23
Am I mistaken? jaxexpat Mar 2020 #24
The embalming process takes care the sanitizing defacto7 Mar 2020 #31
Perhaps cremation should become mandatory. Sogo Mar 2020 #48
Yes, it's HEARTBREAKING that loved ones can't be there to console those who are dying. nt iluvtennis Mar 2020 #26
I said that to 2naSalit Mar 2020 #27
When my sister died in October last year LastLiberal in PalmSprings Mar 2020 #28
Multiply by 1000. NT warmfeet Mar 2020 #29
Cruise ship companies need relief! JenniferJuniper Mar 2020 #33
No words. The tragedy and scars of the past and present, and those to come. 58Sunliner Mar 2020 #36
I have no words apkhgp Mar 2020 #37
Perhaps cremation will become far more common. PoindexterOglethorpe Mar 2020 #38
no words MustLoveBeagles Mar 2020 #40
I know. sheshe2 Mar 2020 #41
My mom died in 2009, my dad two years ago this week MustLoveBeagles Mar 2020 #44
Love to you and yours, MLB. sheshe2 Mar 2020 #45
Same to you and your family sheshe MustLoveBeagles Mar 2020 #46
I had a conversation with the local hospital recently and the local funeral director recently 47of74 Mar 2020 #47
I would like to know if Trump locks Mar 2020 #49

mcar

(42,210 posts)
1. The idea that people cannot gather to memorialize their loved one
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 05:34 PM
Mar 2020

or be there in the hospital with their loved one is just heart-rending.

guillaumeb

(42,641 posts)
2. And while this is happening, Trump is trying to convince his followers that it is NOT happening.
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 05:34 PM
Mar 2020

And as the Covid 19 pandemic inevitably spreads into red states, Trump will still speak about re-opening the country for Easter.

Eliot Rosewater

(31,097 posts)
6. Anyone from MS from this moment on should NOT be allowed to go into any
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 05:36 PM
Mar 2020

state where shelter in place is practiced, ANY state that refuses to do the right thing should be isolated from the rest of us.

This is going to be so fucking bad and I am so fucking angry...

Eliot Rosewater

(31,097 posts)
3. And rump and the GOP are doing everything they can NOT to send equipment and to get
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 05:34 PM
Mar 2020

people out to spread it more.

I used to say that the rank and file con would change their tune when their life was on the line.



I was wrong, they have the minds of children and they are going to let rump kill them...and us.

Amazing.

 

jberryhill

(62,444 posts)
4. "Two hours, that is all it took"
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 05:35 PM
Mar 2020

It's what people don't get about exponential curves. The rate itself accelerates.

The time it took to go from 100 to 1000 was about a week.

It is linear on a log scale as you can see here:

https://www.worldometers.info/coronavirus/country/us/

Scroll down to "deaths" and select "logarithmic".

If you look at that line, we are on track to hit 10,000 toward the end of next week.

Considering that deaths lags cases, you can see where cases have gone.

guillaumeb

(42,641 posts)
11. Many, perhaps most people, are math illiterates.
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 05:43 PM
Mar 2020

They cannot understand how this curve will bend upward, and they cannot calculate simple percentages. So they are math deficient on both the practical and theoretical level.

handmade34

(22,755 posts)
8. yesterday
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 05:41 PM
Mar 2020

I took my partner to a local hospital for laser treatment on one eye (about 3 hour appt)
...wasn't really thinking because we hadn't been out
pulled the car up to the front entrance and volunteer came to car with wheelchair... I said I will be up (5th floor) as soon as I park uh, no... no one goes into the hospital except patients, so, because stores are all closed, I just sat in the car for 3 hours thinking

it really hit home... if he was going in to stay for period of time, I couldn't see him, all those people with loved ones in the hospital, can't be with them... this is horrific!

I have been a caregiver (for loved ones) off and on for 30 years... I have spent many, many days and nights in hospitals with those I care about... I am just devastated by the reality that people cannot do that now

MontanaMama

(23,242 posts)
10. We buried my father in law a week ago.
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 05:42 PM
Mar 2020

No funeral because...the virus. We had a small graveside service where there could be no groups larger than 6 around the grave. We were all with Bill when he took his last breath and I am grateful he wasn’t alone. No one should have to die alone. But this...this thing we have now. I can’t imagine the terror of going on a ventilator without my husband and son with me holding my hand, telling me that I’ll be okay. Or, getting a call that my loved one died without me there to comfort and hold them...It’s too much. It is painful to think this is happening everyday...all day and night.

calimary

(80,699 posts)
30. I'm sorry to hear this.
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 07:53 PM
Mar 2020

Sorry to hear you can't even grieve together or hold each other too close, without risk.

Maybe we all need a national wake when this is over - where we can all sit and mourn together, physically as well as online - what is the Jewish tradition - sitting shiva?

Maybe we need something like that. For whenever this is over. And burn some sacred sage for purification and dispelling evil spirits. Maybe we do that when this is over, and maybe do it again on (or wait til) Biden's inauguration day? I was going to suggest the day after the November election, assuming Biden wins. But the problem with that is that trump can be expected to fight it, drag his heels, not concede, defy the results of the election and dismiss them as fake news, blame somebody/everybody else, and maybe start a war. Or loot the White House of its art and priceless antiques.

(NOTE: The White House keeps in storage all kinds of historical treasures and furniture, rugs, draperies, paintings, and collectibles. I bet he loots THAT place because he knows nobody'll check - at least not for awhile. And in the meantime, he'll have spun out a whole slew of distractions and tweet storms and hissy-fits and lies to distract so we're all looking the other way.)

MontanaMama

(23,242 posts)
32. I like that idea calimary.
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 08:04 PM
Mar 2020

Some sort of national remembrance for those we lost during this nightmare. There will be so many...related to the virus and not.

I regularly burn sage for purification and reflection. That and frankincense. I think you’re on the right track.

tanyev

(42,360 posts)
13. And I don't think the Covidiot in Chief has expressed one word of sympathy
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 05:56 PM
Mar 2020

yet for the loved ones of those who have died.

Initech

(99,915 posts)
43. No, a sociopath like him is incapable of it.
Fri Mar 27, 2020, 12:35 PM
Mar 2020

"We have the best death, the best. Tremendous, tremendous funerals. It's amazing, believe me."

blueinredohio

(6,797 posts)
14. It would be bad for anyone to have to go through this alone
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 05:58 PM
Mar 2020

much less have to die alone. But now that we know this virus does hit children too, I can't imagine leaving a child with strangers. Makes me tear up just thinking about it.

lastlib

(22,981 posts)
15. Largely because One. Dipshit-In-Chief must have his ego stroked.
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 06:42 PM
Mar 2020

I would put my working vocabulary up with anybody, but when I think of the evil that exudes from this basturd, words fail me.

--- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

Traildogbob

(8,584 posts)
21. The churches will be packed Easter
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 07:09 PM
Mar 2020

With dead bodies in coffins while there are assembly line funerals to take care of all trumps murders. It will be like Chapel weddings in Vegas on a Saturday Night when a half price weekend is in full swing.

Mariana

(14,849 posts)
17. Most of the funerals have been cancelled
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 06:58 PM
Mar 2020

for a couple of weeks now. It's not just those who die of the virus. My daughter's friend works in a funeral home, and she assured us that it is not pleasant telling family members they won't be able to hold a traditional viewing and funeral service. It's just too dangerous to have a bunch of grieving people crammed together in a room, crying and hugging and comforting one another. It's awful.

PufPuf23

(8,689 posts)
18. And the death and infection rate is going to get far worse
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 07:02 PM
Mar 2020

and even when the virus ebbs there will be medical, social, psychological, and economic impacts that linger for years.

malaise

(267,823 posts)
19. Meanwhile Don the Con and Mother's Boy
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 07:03 PM
Mar 2020

want everyone to get back to work - and forget the real pain of this virus - they don't want us to pay attention to this horrific situation.

 

smirkymonkey

(63,221 posts)
23. There was a good article in the Boston Globe on this topic today.
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 07:26 PM
Mar 2020
https://www.bostonglobe.com/2020/03/26/opinion/coronavirus-cautionary-tale-italy-part-ii-us-should-find-ways-better-honor-dead/

Lesson from Italy: As US coronavirus deaths climb, country should find way to honor the dead

In Italy, where the death toll has climbed to 6,820, funerals have been banned for weeks, and many graveyards are closed to prevent grieving families from visiting the tombs of loved ones. The absence of ritual burial breaks something that is deeply ingrained in the human spirit.
By Mattia Ferraresi

In the wee hours of March 19, a line of 30 military vehicles transported several dozen coffins out of the city of Bergamo, in northern Italy, as the local crematories could not keep up with the pace of people dying from COVID-19. Watching the footage of the heartbreaking procession through the eerily empty highways made me want to cover my ears and scream when my neighbors started singing from their balconies.

It wasn’t just the deaths that bothered me. They are a reality that I, like all other Italians, have been forced to reckon with at least once a day, at 6 p.m., when the authorities update the death toll and the number of the newly infected.

It was the profound sense of loneliness that really affected me — the lack of funerals and communal rituals to commemorate the departed. Many victims of the coronavirus have died without family members being able to say goodbye or to be present when coffins are buried.

In Italy, where the death toll has climbed to 6,820 — making it the country with the most victims — both civil and religious funerals have been banned for weeks, and many graveyards are closed to prevent grieving families from visiting the tombs of loved ones. Upon request, one priest is allowed to give a blessing to the coffin before the burial. Very few mourners are allowed to be present. [snip]

But I can’t stop thinking about what we lost during those weeks. Thousands of people died alone. And many more family members will forever feel a void. People have died without dignity. Without ceremony. Families have been left without an outlet for mourning.

It’s something that I have worried about: What might happen to my own family if someone should fall ill? A friend confided to me that his greatest fear is that his mother, who lives alone, may get infected and die without him being able to see her for the last time. I was moved when I heard about an 84-year-old priest in a hospital who held his phone next to dying patients to allow their family members to say goodbye... [more at link]

jaxexpat

(6,703 posts)
24. Am I mistaken?
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 07:27 PM
Mar 2020

I thought I'd heard that the virus was able to remain infectious on the host's corpse for a period of time, days?
If this is true, there won't be too much concern about funeral attendance because the embalmers will be sick. Perhaps, don't pay the funeral home costs up front.
My memory might be wrong. But this may be another issue to absorb here.

defacto7

(13,485 posts)
31. The embalming process takes care the sanitizing
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 08:00 PM
Mar 2020

But until then there is nothing that would keep the virus from being viable for a very long time. There's plenty for the virus to attach to.

2naSalit

(86,061 posts)
27. I said that to
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 07:41 PM
Mar 2020

my siblings and other relatives last week. My mom is not well and in her nineties in assisted living which is in isolation from the outside. It's not a good situation.

28. When my sister died in October last year
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 07:43 PM
Mar 2020

I flew from Palm Springs to Denver so that someone from our family would be holding her hand when she passed away. Even though she was in a coma the whole time I was there, having her die alone in a nursing home was anathema to me. Even her son, who lives in Malaysia, didn't make the effort to be with his mother because "the trip would take too long and cost a lot of money."

I can't even imagine the pain the family of coronavirus victims are going through. Amy Klobuchar was almost in tears last week when she told Rachel that she couldn't even go into the hospital where her husband, John, was being cared for.

apkhgp

(1,068 posts)
37. I have no words
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 08:30 PM
Mar 2020

to describe the anger I feel at the entire 45 administration letting our whole country wide open to this crisis. Back in the 2016 Election campaign it was said that anyone elected to the White House would face a crisis. This is it right here. Now we see how much of a miserable failure he is.

PoindexterOglethorpe

(25,750 posts)
38. Perhaps cremation will become far more common.
Thu Mar 26, 2020, 08:37 PM
Mar 2020

That doesn't solve the problem of not having some kind of service or memorial, but it might be a lot better than bodies just piling up.

MustLoveBeagles

(11,563 posts)
44. My mom died in 2009, my dad two years ago this week
Fri Mar 27, 2020, 06:29 PM
Mar 2020

I miss them a lot but am glad they didn't live to see this. I do worry about my remaining relatives, especially my 7 year old half brother in the Philippines and my two half chinese cousins here in the US.

sheshe2

(83,347 posts)
45. Love to you and yours, MLB.
Fri Mar 27, 2020, 06:35 PM
Mar 2020

Trying to keep my 94 year old mom alive, homecare here.

Stay safe my friend.

 

47of74

(18,470 posts)
47. I had a conversation with the local hospital recently and the local funeral director recently
Fri Mar 27, 2020, 11:48 PM
Mar 2020

I am not expecting anything to happen anytime soon, but I told the hospital if something did happen to me and it got to the point where they had to decide between me and someone else let me go and save the other person. I'd rather the ventilator be saved for someone else and to just make me comfortable.

Also talked to the funeral director I have my arrangements with that we normally do. Again I'm hoping it's another 50 years before my arrangements need to be put into use but doesn't hurt to be prepared. My plans before now were that I would have the traditional wake and funeral followed by cremation and later burial as they did with my aunt when she passed in 2015. I told him if I did go unexpectedly while all this is going on to go to cremation right away and hold on to the ashes until it was safe to do a regular funeral service.

locks

(2,012 posts)
49. I would like to know if Trump
Sat Mar 28, 2020, 06:21 PM
Mar 2020

has said or written one word of condolence to the families of the 1,600 Americans who have died from the coronavirus, 402 of them yesterday.

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