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Cary

(11,746 posts)
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 01:40 PM Feb 2020

My Problem: Any Thoughts Appreciated

Last edited Fri Feb 14, 2020, 06:52 PM - Edit history (1)

1. I am in distress over Orange Hitler and his moronic base. This should never happen in the United States of America.

2. I have grown to dislike discussing politics as facts and my logic seem to lack currency, leading to item 1.

3. The risk of losing in November with no checks on Orange Hitler is unacceptable, leading to item 1.

4. I dislike our primary, leading to item 1.

I don't believe in wishing my life away but the next 11 months are not a good time for me. On top of that I am encountering similar dysfunctional behavior in my profession. I feel anger. My confidence is lowered. I am disappointed.

I have been depressed and this isn't depression but I could see it perhaps progressing to that point. I am aging and while I am not that old I do feel less vibrant. I can think of all kinds of things to do to take charge and would have done those things at a younger age. That adds to my distress as well.

This place, well, it can be frustrating too with all of the conflict.

So I am throwing this at the wall to see what bounces back. Thanks for listening.

79 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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My Problem: Any Thoughts Appreciated (Original Post) Cary Feb 2020 OP
Just remember, you are not alone... Wounded Bear Feb 2020 #1
Find community IRL. Grasswire2 Feb 2020 #2
My main hobby is Shotokan Cary Feb 2020 #6
I could say find some boards with the Marmalade Shartcannon painted on... mwooldri Feb 2020 #18
Wado is cool Cary Feb 2020 #21
Is there a way you can make a difference to someone in your community? WhiskeyGrinder Feb 2020 #3
At the clip that Trump has accelerated his crimin', he might not make it 'til Nov Dennis Donovan Feb 2020 #4
You have more faith than I do Cary Feb 2020 #8
Exactly right pandr32 Feb 2020 #11
Why I call the GOP the Trump Party. NT mwooldri Feb 2020 #19
You mean like shooting someone on Fifth Avenue in NYC? CTyankee Feb 2020 #12
Boggles my mind Cary Feb 2020 #17
Well, I guess we were warned. CTyankee Feb 2020 #56
You overestimate them quakerboy Feb 2020 #62
oops, I assumed that you are older --- sorry Grasswire2 Feb 2020 #5
this is absolutely true. barbtries Feb 2020 #35
First, take care of yourself. When we get too far down, we need to remove ourselves enough Feb 2020 #7
Thanks. Yes, trying to do that Cary Feb 2020 #10
You have plenty of company pandr32 Feb 2020 #9
There was an article about School age children barring True Blue American Feb 2020 #30
Exactly and we have a monster role model in the WH pandr32 Feb 2020 #54
#BeBest (nt) TommyCelt Feb 2020 #60
Or, True Blue American Feb 2020 #63
Primaries are always messy. GoCubsGo Feb 2020 #13
Definitely, that is my plan Cary Feb 2020 #15
I don't believe that many of us are enjoying it. GoCubsGo Feb 2020 #27
Sad to wish away good years Cary Feb 2020 #29
Huh? GoCubsGo Feb 2020 #46
I am talking about all of Orange Hitler years Cary Feb 2020 #59
Oh, gotcha. GoCubsGo Feb 2020 #65
How are you with an axe, hammer, pick and shovel? Hermit-The-Prog Feb 2020 #14
I have had to cut down on my political news consumption. forgotmylogin Feb 2020 #16
Yes. Cary Feb 2020 #20
Same story True Blue American Feb 2020 #33
Did you see this thread? I found it very helpful: Amaryllis Feb 2020 #22
No I didn't. Thank you. Cary Feb 2020 #24
I understand where you are. peacebuzzard Feb 2020 #23
I love my cat! Cary Feb 2020 #25
THANKS FOR THE SUPPORT! Cary Feb 2020 #26
winter is half over Kali Feb 2020 #28
Thanks, yes Cary Feb 2020 #32
On the first day that it is nice enough outside, take your binoculars and GO. Read Nay Feb 2020 #72
You're not alone. And it's not just the U.S., it's worldwide. VOX Feb 2020 #31
it's really hard for me too. barbtries Feb 2020 #34
Feeling many of those things too n/t hibbing Feb 2020 #36
Item 1 OneCrazyDiamond Feb 2020 #37
From your lips to God's ear! Cary Feb 2020 #79
My suggestions: Find your inner stoic, work on humility and help others. KY_EnviroGuy Feb 2020 #38
Volunteer to sign up new voters randr Feb 2020 #39
Do you have a dog to snuggle with? They can be great reminders of Goodness. Karadeniz Feb 2020 #40
Instead of watching the news go to youtube, put on a good pair of headphones & pick one of many yaesu Feb 2020 #41
This is what I think Silver1 Feb 2020 #42
First things first--take care of yourself and stay strong Ponietz Feb 2020 #43
I've had a virus the last 2 days and started having nausea. 58Sunliner Feb 2020 #44
You have all of my best wishes. safeinOhio Feb 2020 #45
Tarnished marieo1 Feb 2020 #47
Watch this and think about it Dyedinthewoolliberal Feb 2020 #48
I feel ya - if trump wins/steals another election - I dont think I want to live in america anymore TalenaGor Feb 2020 #49
get away from politics for a couple of weeks and dedicate time to your sport or hobby Perseus Feb 2020 #50
It's anxiety. You might even experience a panic attack. PatrickforO Feb 2020 #51
You are battling the human condition. gembaby1 Feb 2020 #52
You are suffering from PTSD lunatica Feb 2020 #53
Not sure this is helpful one bit. But I go through KPN Feb 2020 #55
I feel your pain tiredtoo Feb 2020 #57
as a person with emotional disorders... stillcool Feb 2020 #58
Turn off the teevee and limit your Intertoobz to cat videos for a week. TygrBright Feb 2020 #61
Turning off the television is a good one. hunter Feb 2020 #68
Thanks. I learned 'em the hard way. TygrBright Feb 2020 #70
Everything you mentioned I am feeling too. Mickju Feb 2020 #64
I would recommend disconnecting from politics for 30+ days... Chakaconcarne Feb 2020 #66
Everyday I feel like this Pepsidog Feb 2020 #67
Oh yes, I completely understand. BigDemVoter Feb 2020 #69
Thanks for writing - some more thoughts in addition to the great ideas posted by others... jmbar2 Feb 2020 #71
Suck it up.... Toorich Feb 2020 #73
I totally understand and relate. hamsterjill Feb 2020 #74
Ideas McKim Feb 2020 #75
As others have stated, you are not alone. I, too pnwest Feb 2020 #76
Just hang out in the DU Lounge for awhile. It's fun and relaxing. patricia92243 Feb 2020 #77
This thread is a lot more fun than I have had here at DU in quite some time Cary Feb 2020 #78

Wounded Bear

(58,662 posts)
1. Just remember, you are not alone...
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 01:43 PM
Feb 2020

we're all trying to fight the good fighth.

Maintain hope, for some of us it's all we have.

Grasswire2

(13,571 posts)
2. Find community IRL.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 01:46 PM
Feb 2020

You certainly are not alone in your sentiments.

Senior community center?

Neighbors? Protest groups who gather and stand with signs?

You can certainly be actively resisting via Letters To The Editor, social media sharing of information.

Join the aclu for ten bucks or so and lend your voice to the cause of liberty.

Or get away from it altogether. Seek endorphins to lift your mood. (music, laughter, dark chocolate, beauty, walking...)

You might find some relief in watching old-time comedies (certainly PLENTY of that on youtube) like Marx Bros, Three Stooges, George Carlin, whatever suits you.

Have you got a hobby?

Cary

(11,746 posts)
6. My main hobby is Shotokan
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 01:52 PM
Feb 2020

Last week at a tournament I was very excited to do my kata, Kankudai. I get through the first 10 moves really well. I am in a zone but then what happens?

I transition into Heian Ni Dan. Now Kankudai is the Heian katas so this is somewhat understandable but I am embarrassed and this isn't helping me either.

Damn, I should have done Gojushiusho.

mwooldri

(10,303 posts)
18. I could say find some boards with the Marmalade Shartcannon painted on...
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:07 PM
Feb 2020

... and smash those boards to smithereens.

Practicing kata is good. Making me ashamed I gave up karate (Wado Ryu) those years ago, now I'm as stiff as those boards I'm advising to smash...

WhiskeyGrinder

(22,355 posts)
3. Is there a way you can make a difference to someone in your community?
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 01:47 PM
Feb 2020

Volunteering, direct action and direct donation outside of political parties are great ways to strengthen your community and make a difference to people now, without relying on the political process. It also helps build resilience for systemic change, whether within our outside the political process.

Dennis Donovan

(18,770 posts)
4. At the clip that Trump has accelerated his crimin', he might not make it 'til Nov
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 01:47 PM
Feb 2020

At some point there *will* be a line he crosses that will be too much, even for the GOP.

He is completely out of control - an implosion is coming.

Cary

(11,746 posts)
8. You have more faith than I do
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 01:54 PM
Feb 2020

Orange Hitler took a party that was "conservative" with a white supremacist fringe and transformed it into a white.supremacist party with some "conservative" hanger on-ers.

Attribution: John Fugelsang

Cary

(11,746 posts)
17. Boggles my mind
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:06 PM
Feb 2020

Yep.

I have a lot of experience with cults but I am still unsettled by those who gleefully follow.

quakerboy

(13,920 posts)
62. You overestimate them
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 04:10 PM
Feb 2020

Or underestimate how complicit they are.

They cant take him down without taking themselves down. Short of finding a deal that lets themselves off the hook, they will not turn, no matter what line he crosses. And the impeachment, needed as it was, just added to the visible complicity and made them all the less likely to turn on him, no matter the provocation.

Grasswire2

(13,571 posts)
5. oops, I assumed that you are older --- sorry
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 01:50 PM
Feb 2020

Didn't read your note well enough.

Have you talked to a doctor about how you are feeling? I know they are seeing increasing numbers of people affected by the politics of the day.

My suggestion about seeking endorphins holds.

Maybe stay away from the primary forum here.

barbtries

(28,798 posts)
35. this is absolutely true.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:39 PM
Feb 2020

when i went to my doctor after the election i asked him directly and he said yes, he had been seeing many people unnerved and discombobulated, afraid and feeling depressed, when trump took over.

enough

(13,259 posts)
7. First, take care of yourself. When we get too far down, we need to remove ourselves
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 01:52 PM
Feb 2020

from the constant barrage of information. Whatever you like to do, do that for a while. Also, get outside, move around. Maybe try something new, or something you used to do but haven’t done for a while. And don’t worry about being old. There’s still a lot you can do. I’m 75, so I know. I wish you well, these are really hard times.

pandr32

(11,586 posts)
9. You have plenty of company
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 01:55 PM
Feb 2020

Not all are people who are older, either. I have young adult children who have confessed similar worries and anxiety. Both work with the public to some degree and are discouraged with your number 1 and 2, same as you. It has led them to retreat politically and keep their liberalism to themselves. Both have lost some of their optimism for our country.
We recently had visitors from Canada and got a shock of our lives. A Canadian actually claimed Trump is the best president we've ever had, Hillary murdered people, and Trump Jr. will be elected in 2024 after his father serves another term. Being from Canada ourselves this was quite a shock. Not all our friends and family from there believe this way, but quite obviously social media and FOX News have had some success indoctrinating people across the border.

Our perpetual elections have become reality TV. There is much more opinion being circulated than facts. We are all seeing the nasty effects.

Happy Valentine's Day anyway. I refuse to give my hope for better away, but I will give you a heart.

True Blue American

(17,985 posts)
30. There was an article about School age children barring
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:26 PM
Feb 2020

Hispanics from moving,shouting,” This is Trump Country. One case took place in Ohio.

Children learning from the bullly. It was on my local station and MSNBC!

Children see, children do!

GoCubsGo

(32,086 posts)
13. Primaries are always messy.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 01:59 PM
Feb 2020

Pick who you like. Vote for them. When it's over, support whomever gets the nomination, even if you don't like them. ALL of them are infinitely better than Trump. Tune the rest out. A lot of the current discord and discouragement are being sown by outside sources. They saw what happened in 2016, and they believe it will work again, so here we go again. Judging by the levels of infighting we're seeing, it appears they are right. Time to stop falling for it. I get that people are scared, but we really need to stop doing the Right's bidding for them.

GoCubsGo

(32,086 posts)
27. I don't believe that many of us are enjoying it.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:24 PM
Feb 2020

I sure am not. Can't wait until it's all over.

GoCubsGo

(32,086 posts)
65. Oh, gotcha.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 04:19 PM
Feb 2020

Yep. The last 3 years definitely were not only wasted, but also a massive leap backwards in so many ways.

Hermit-The-Prog

(33,349 posts)
14. How are you with an axe, hammer, pick and shovel?
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:04 PM
Feb 2020

Strenuous physical activity can cure a lot of ails, both physical and emotional. (As long as there is no health impediment to doing so). I'm not being facetious.

forgotmylogin

(7,529 posts)
16. I have had to cut down on my political news consumption.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:04 PM
Feb 2020

I don't turn on MSNBC as much (love them, but it feels like they're screaming into the wind sometimes) and switched my car stereo and clock radio alarm away from NPR. I even occasionally declare a moratorium on reading here sometimes for a day or a couple of hours.

Now I make choices when I want to hear news and avoid it if I'm in no mood. Obsessing about politics can grate on the soul sometimes, so I specifically divert the choice from "wonder what I45 has done now" to "let me listen to some music or go outside and get some air."

Don't ever get the idea that taking time for self-care equates to apathy.

Cary

(11,746 posts)
20. Yes.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:09 PM
Feb 2020

I am watching less as well but the triggers are all around me.

Disinformation bothers me. I want to attack disinformation and crush it.

Amaryllis

(9,524 posts)
22. Did you see this thread? I found it very helpful:
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:13 PM
Feb 2020

https://www.democraticunderground.com/100212977409

Dan Rather: "They are counting on despair. That's how they win."
They are counting on despair. That's how they win.

Those who seek to undermine our democracy, to normalize corruption and hate and division... They are counting on despair.

Those who say our votes don't matter, that facts don't matter, that the truth doesn't matter... They are counting on despair.

Those who say there are "real Americans," that we need to go back to a mythic past, that we should close ourselves to the world... They are counting on despair.

Those who would despoil our environment and undermine science... They are counting on despair.

Those who would gaslight, lie, and revel in propaganda... They are counting on despair.

Those who look the other way, make excuses, and normalize autocracy... They are counting on despair.

There is a tendency to feel the despair well up from within, and not recognize it as a weapon being wielded with precision and purpose from without. They are counting on despair.

The greatest leaders in our history knew that despair is toxic to progress. Washington at Valley Forge. Lincoln at Gettysburg. Martin Luther King, Jr. in Birmingham. But more than the famous names are the countless women and men who have fought back against despair in the service of hope, and progress. I have seen it in foxholes, on picket lines, in classrooms, and in midst of natural disasters. I have seen it in the marches, movements, and moments where people rose up and said our world can be better, and we will do the hard work to make it so.

Despair these days is an understandable feeling. Our world seems in many ways upside down. To fight against the odds, against the powerful, against the morally bankrupt, is exhausting. But just remember, they are counting on despair. Will you let them have it?


https://www.facebook.com/theDanRather/posts/10163050285505716

Cary

(11,746 posts)
24. No I didn't. Thank you.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:18 PM
Feb 2020

Yes they are sowing despair to discourage us from voting and that was on my mind as I voiced my despair.

So I figured that the best way to deal with it was to voice that despair. The best way to deal with it was to share it and solicit replies like yours. Thank you. You are helpful.

Feelings have a beginning, a middle, and an end. They aren't good or bad, they just are. So okay I am despairing at the moment. It is ok. This too shall pass.

peacebuzzard

(5,174 posts)
23. I understand where you are.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:13 PM
Feb 2020

It takes guts and fortitude to even wake up or sleep at night, it seems.

Just way too many things wrong at the moment, and I can only offer this: understanding and, indeed, commiseration.

It did help me tremendously to tune out of MSM for the most part. I rarely, if ever go there. I do spend more time reading and writing during my off-work hours. I have cats I care for, which is great.

I rarely socialize, however. It seems to zap even more energy.

Best wishes....Peace.

Kali

(55,011 posts)
28. winter is half over
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:25 PM
Feb 2020

the daylight and weather will start to help improve mood, but getting outside anyway can really help. when at DU, avoid the primaries forum and stay in the Lounge.

Cary

(11,746 posts)
32. Thanks, yes
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:26 PM
Feb 2020

Winter blues. It is very cold today here in Chicago.

That is part of my problem too.

Nay

(12,051 posts)
72. On the first day that it is nice enough outside, take your binoculars and GO. Read
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 04:58 PM
Feb 2020

this poem a few times to get in the mood. Maybe start a nature journal? I have.

The Peace of Wild Things
Wendell Berry

When despair for the world grows in me
And I wake in the night at the least sound
In fear of what my life and my children's lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
Rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
Who do not tax their lives with forethought of grief.
I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
Waiting with their light.
For a time I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.


Like others here, I do not watch TV. (Only movies, etc, with no ads). I take an hour to read news on DU and that's it. Also, when I went to the Gulf Coast for 3 weeks, I did not have a computer and saw absolutely no political shit. I bird watched early every morning and make quite a list of spectacular birds, and then painted them all in my journal.

VOX

(22,976 posts)
31. You're not alone. And it's not just the U.S., it's worldwide.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:26 PM
Feb 2020

For multiple reasons (or lack thereof), much of the world is in a wrestling match with autocracy/nationalism vs. democracy/tolerance. The UK, France, Italy, Netherlands, Sweden, Denmark, Germany, Poland, Czechoslovakia, Hungary and even Brazil are grappling with toxic nationalist movements/governments. This isn’t helpful to your discomfort, but know that there WILL eventually be a reversal of this toxic tide.

I say this cautiously: your distress and overload make perfect sense, given what’s occurring. I’d be far more worried if you WEREN’T feeling this way. Again, small comfort, but realize that you’re completely stable, rational and heed reality. That’s no small feat these days.

Your depletion is also “normal,” as we’re witnessing some very strange and unsettling events. But in order to stay on-balance and not slide into depression, you must distract yourself from the “noise” for awhile. Whatever interest gives you life, go there, really delve into it. Example: I’ve gotten into playing guitar again; I collect vintage pre-WWII baseball and boxing cards; I also collect “military minatures” (toy soldiers ) and really delve into history. Astronomy is another interest that connects me with something bigger than the imagination. Anything that gives you life is on the table.

Final suggestion: Stay away from the media as much as possible. You’ll feel a compulsion to “check things out,” but don’t give in; think of it as toxic. Your rest and relaxation will build up your brain’s “feel good” neurotransmitters.

Hang in there. We’re right here with you. Go safely.


barbtries

(28,798 posts)
34. it's really hard for me too.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:34 PM
Feb 2020

right after the election I was still working including with people i knew had voted for trump, so for the first time in my life (i'm 64) I went to my doctor and got a prescription. I told him I need to maintain professionalism with certain people I feel extremely hostile toward, and from the start I recognized that trump would be a catastrophe. He prescribed klonopin, and anti anxiety medication, and i take about 2 every week. i don't take it daily because it is addictive. I find that I am more productive on days after I take it and so I would say it has been helpful for me.

I also see a counselor. There were other dramas in my life that precipitated that, including losing my job and a family tragedy, but at some sessions we talk extensively about the trauma of trump. This has been for over the past year now, and I've scaled down because I think I am better able to cope and stave off a full blown depression now, and my counselor agrees, but he's still there for me and I will probably continue to see him from time to time.

and this may sound anti-intuitive, but i Twitter. I block anyone who is a trumpster and have followed thousands of resisters and gained quite a few as well. I think of it as group therapy. Because I have a pretty well controlled twitter feed, I get a lot of information and a lot of validation of my views and my distress at what's happened to my country.

I don't know if any of this can work for you or not. Oh yeah I turn off the news on a regular basis and watch youtube videos about other things, happy things. Farmers and birth vlogs and cute puppies and vet shows and cooking. it calms my thoughts.

nothing seems to change since he took office except to get worse. I'm in the resistance for as long as need be even to the death. Many people are not engaged as we are on DU and from my perspective, they are almost oblivious to the damage being done. I wear them out when I talk about it a lot, but I also educate them and raise their consciousness if only a teensy bit.

Lastly, I've become involved in local politics. I'm sec/treas for my precinct. I have marched and participated in get out the vote efforts. I write and call my 2 republican senators. so. check in by and by, I hope you feel better soon. i hope we all will.

OneCrazyDiamond

(2,032 posts)
37. Item 1
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:50 PM
Feb 2020

Is the the result of a dying ideology. The last flash of dying star. That is why they are cramming through judge appointments. Election wins will be fewer and fewer. They know it.

KY_EnviroGuy

(14,492 posts)
38. My suggestions: Find your inner stoic, work on humility and help others.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:51 PM
Feb 2020

I developed clinical depression in my late 50s and struggle with it every day, now at 72. Along with some herbs and supplements I take, I find the best relief in helping others in any way I can, like fixing stuff. Perhaps you can channel some of your Shotokan energy into that.

Meditation techniques I developed early in my alcohol recovery program carried me through many trials, as I had to travel all over the US for several years for a living as a service engineer. Now retired, I still treasure those methods.They help me to reset my ego and keep things in perspective.

Being the extremely curious sort, I also had to take a path of discovery to learn more about myself and the human race in general. Learning some things about personality types and evolution has helped me learn acceptance, one of the keys to true inner peace and happiness.

I hope you find your path to peace and joy. It must be your path........

yaesu

(8,020 posts)
41. Instead of watching the news go to youtube, put on a good pair of headphones & pick one of many
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:58 PM
Feb 2020

thousands of ASMR videos to watch, my favorite is Spa's, haircuts or simple ear to ear tapping, whispering

Silver1

(721 posts)
42. This is what I think
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 02:59 PM
Feb 2020

Do what you can, even if it's small things. But do something.

There will be victories and there will be losses. It's not a sprint, it's a marathon.

Pace yourself and conserve your energy so you can do more.

Don't let the negative voices take you down! Ignore them!

WE CAN WIN IN NOVEMBER.

Ponietz

(2,974 posts)
43. First things first--take care of yourself and stay strong
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 03:00 PM
Feb 2020

lots of green 🥬 vegetables, daily sunlight, and moderate exercise. Don’t let the cobwebs build up. This remedy keeps the mind strong, too. That’s all I got. Best regards

58Sunliner

(4,386 posts)
44. I've had a virus the last 2 days and started having nausea.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 03:02 PM
Feb 2020

At least I think it was a virus. I realized the stomach pain and discomfort was actually stress. I did some deep breathing and was able to sleep. I had been taking Tums and drinking Pepto Bismul. The first time I have ever felt like I had an ulcer. You are not alone in feeling like your IQ has gone down the toilet the past few months/years. We are having to use our most basic survival stress responses and that is a killer. Remember when we used to have nuanced conversations about policy? I'm reduced to flinging verbal poo in rage. And I am dealing with a spinal injury which isn't helping at all. Those of us with a history of abuse and PTSD are at risk. This POS is constantly triggering.
There are many good suggestions here. Fresh air and exercise are really important. I like herbal tea, can't live without it. Make something grow, classical music helps. Last night I spent time watching the Aurora Borealis online.

safeinOhio

(32,687 posts)
45. You have all of my best wishes.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 03:05 PM
Feb 2020

My SO is a lot like you and is suffering from this too.
You are at the right place to share your feeling on this issue. Remember this, a problem shared is a problem cut in half. A lot of great idea generated from this post that I'm sure is helping others.

Best of luck and stay Safe.

marieo1

(1,402 posts)
47. Tarnished
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 03:06 PM
Feb 2020

I have never hated anyone in my entire life as much as I hate DJT and his enablers. They have tarnished our White House. I pray we can get all of the trash out of the WH and some people in it with some honesty and a sense of what is right and wrong and with a strong commitment to our constitution.

Dyedinthewoolliberal

(15,577 posts)
48. Watch this and think about it
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 03:13 PM
Feb 2020

Giving up is exactly what some people want. Increasing your anxiety and distress is part of their plan. But it's not gonna work. As Abe Lincoln said ' You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you can't fool all of the people all of the time'

https://www.msnbc.com/all-in/watch/chris-hayes-trump-is-weak-and-beatable-78517317507

TalenaGor

(1,104 posts)
49. I feel ya - if trump wins/steals another election - I dont think I want to live in america anymore
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 03:14 PM
Feb 2020

not sure I can take it...im 51...im sick of this shit

 

Perseus

(4,341 posts)
50. get away from politics for a couple of weeks and dedicate time to your sport or hobby
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 03:21 PM
Feb 2020

That is what I did, I got away from the politics, kind of came to DU and browsed once in a while, read a couple of books (pick something with humor), I happen to like Kurt Vonnegut, even though his stories are about "human stupidity" he does it in a very funny way. My favourite is "Cat's Cradle".

Watch funny movies, or romantic movies with good endings of course.

Get away from it all for a couple of weeks, be disciplined about it, and when you come back you will be very relaxed.

Good luck to you, I hope it works out.

PatrickforO

(14,576 posts)
51. It's anxiety. You might even experience a panic attack.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 03:27 PM
Feb 2020

If you do, your heart will race so much it will feel like you might be having 'the big one.' Your body might jerk in a convulsion or two. You may feel a kind of crawly sensation inside, as if you are dizzy and losing your balance but it isn't that. It's sort of an internal wobbliness.

This whole thing sucks. No doubt.

To do my part, I have resolved internally that I will be neutral on this board toward all the candidates (within reason - I can't promise that 100%), and will wholeheartedly support our nominee, whoever that may be.

In the meantime I believe this site is quite well moderated, and good people do their level best to keep out trolls. That's why I like it here. It is a gentle, nice place. Most on here (but not all) are well informed, well-read, bright and write succinctly. (Well I tend to be a bit verbose, but that's just me).

Now two things:
1. The main thing to remember is that the centrists in our party are NOT evil, nor are the progressives, and, though only a part of the group on here will agree, I believe any one of them could beat Trump. Amy, Joe, Pete, Elizabeth or Bernie. Or even the two billionaires in the race, Steyer and Bloomberg. All of us want the same thing, which is the return of our republic and forward progress in stuff like healthcare, climate change, education and the like.

2. If this group bothers you, and you decide to alleviate that, you might go on a site like The Hill and contend with the real trolls and right wing-nuts that infest that board. You'll get a thicker skin pretty quickly.

Just remember Cary, you are among friends here on DU. Speaking for myself, I am neutral toward one or two people on here and like the rest. I really, really like about 20 people on here. It's a good place.


gembaby1

(253 posts)
52. You are battling the human condition.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 03:29 PM
Feb 2020

Things tend to be circular in life. Times get good and then people get dissatisfied anyway and start acting like their bored and that there are colossal problems when there is barely anything. It’s what led up to ‘The Great War’ and other stupid follies. People like to push their luck and start ‘experimenting’.

We’ve been here before and it’ll happen again. Progress is not a straight easy road and its not a forgone conclusion. Put aside the hubris because no country is immune from this. You institutions are only as strong as the people willing to fight for them.

I am sorry but know that it will end. All dictators fall. Whether anyone will learn from this, is entirely a different question.

Just look back on history. This is the world we live in. Just take care of yourself and never stop fighting for your ideals. That’s what’s most important. Good luck.

lunatica

(53,410 posts)
53. You are suffering from PTSD
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 03:36 PM
Feb 2020

We all are to some extent. He has wrought emotional violence on everyone, including his MAGATs who will also pay a personal price psychically. Don’t let it get any worse by ignoring the seriousness of the effect it’s having on you.

It’s like you want Trump and his invasive Trumpist followers to just go away but you also feel you don’t dare relax because the emotional blows are coming so fast, one after the other. The effect is hyper vigilance. It’s what happens whenever there is a bullying abuser who has power over you living in your life.

The important thing to do is, first, acknowledge the truth of the situation, including your inability to do anything about the situation. Then figure out what you CAN do for yourself to escape the feelings of despair. The answers will come to you. We all have recourses to care for ourselves. Do you have vacation time coming? Take it and do something you love without paying attention to the news while you’re doing it. It will all still be there when you get back, ready to fight again. Just figure out what your alternatives are and do them.

The number one rule that all emotionally stable people do is know when they have to take care of themselves in order to be the best they can be. Do things you love. If you love movies then binge watch them. If you love reading then binge read. Spoil yourself a little. You’ll be better able to fight the good fight when you return.

KPN

(15,646 posts)
55. Not sure this is helpful one bit. But I go through
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 03:41 PM
Feb 2020

the exact same cycle and feelings. What has helped me is reflecting on three years I spent as a Peace Corps Volunteer in Africa in the mid 70s. It seemed to me that the governments throughout the entire continent were blatantly corrupt during my time there. By and large, the people were poor — abundantly, ubiquitously so. At the same time, they seemed almost always to have a genuinely happy demeanor and spirit.

Autocrats and corruption dominated politics and governments, yet life went on. Life wasn’t perfect, but the human spirit prevailed. The country I served in, Lesotho, was rated as the 3rd poorest in the world by the UN when I first went over there. Yet the people were by and large happy. They survived, and they enjoyed despite economic and political conditions. It struck me that they actually did have wealth, but it was a wealth of human spirit, a wealth of each other, a wealth of relationships, of camaraderie. It was inspiring to say the least.

So, I reflect on that experience to help me through the depressing moments and days. I take comfort and gain optimism from the knowledge that the human spirit can and does prevail at the society level if not in every case the personal level despite political and economic conditions. I see that same thing in our own young in America today. They pull together, they form bonds of common interest and purpose like I’ve not seen since the Vietnam War protest years. It gives me optimism. Life will go on, people on the whole will find the means to be happy and enjoy life despite whatever is thrown at them. There will be pain, there will be sacrifice, but unless the world dies, life will go on. And there will be reasons to feel good.

It helps me to reflect on what I experienced in Africa. And it’s definitely better than the alternative ... which for me would be a never ending negative spiral downward. So So I use it to get myself out of that bad head space and focus on something more productive. It works for me.

tiredtoo

(2,949 posts)
57. I feel your pain
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 03:52 PM
Feb 2020

Being disabled to the extent I can no longer participate in rallies/demonstrations and similar actions makes my fear grow. All we can do is what we can do. The conflict in this place will settle in a few months, our candidate will be selected. Personally I donate a little money to candidates, I provide transportation to people knocking on doors, I donate food products (apples/pizzas/soda etc.)to meetings of like minded groups. And i try to share my reasons for opposing the orange turd at every opportunity. I plan to continue with these efforts until the election in November. And any other actions requested that fall within my limits. My biggest effort will be getting out the vote in November. Vote Blue No Matter Who!
To relieve some of the pain and suffering get a good book (non-political) and sit someplace of comfort. Bury yourself in the book for awhile. Just walk away from the world for a bit.

Hope this relieves your pain some. Carry on, Carry on!

stillcool

(32,626 posts)
58. as a person with emotional disorders...
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 03:58 PM
Feb 2020

on a good day, here's my coping tricks
1. Go outside, and see what there is to see. The sun, the woods, the beach, whatever is in your backyard. Breathe. Walk. Think of the present, and what you are grateful for.
2. Go outside, at night, and see what there is to see. Telescope is good, but the naked eye works just as well. Imagine what you could be seeing. Pick out a star and make it your own. Mine is Capella. She an I are simpatico.
3. Think about how many people have populated the earth before you came along. Imagine...they all had a story, they all had a life.
4. Do not watch any cable news programming.
5. Stay away from all things political, a day at a time. It's amazing how I can fill time with productive activities.

TygrBright

(20,760 posts)
61. Turn off the teevee and limit your Intertoobz to cat videos for a week.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 04:08 PM
Feb 2020

During that week, take lots of walks outdoors.

If possible, at least once a day stop in a coffee shop and chat cheerfully with the baristas, and smile at a couple of customers. If you bought a coffee, sit and drink it while looking around and finding five things that are kinda cool to look at.

Make yourself at least one nice meal a day.

Phone and talk voice-to-voice with an elderly relative. See if you can make them laugh.

Depending on where you live and what your preferences are, work a challenging jigsaw puzzle, clean out a garden bed for spring, make a bird house, or other absorbing activity that has a "result".

Go to bed early every night. If you have insomnia, don't kick yourself around... watch the moon, read a little poetry, make a cup of chamomile tea, go back to bed, rinse, repeat.

Walk the dog or play with the cat every day. If you don't have a furry buddy, visit a dog park and offer to throw sticks or tennis balls for a worn-out dog mom/dad. Make friends with a couple of the friendliest puppers you see.

Be an audience at least once, for something. A school play, a lecture at the library, a free concert at the park, whatever. Notice the people in the audience with you. What do you think their lives and problems are like? Smile if they catch you looking.

Practice healing breathing in the morning and the evening. Just a few breaths, consciously, mindfully, slowly taken, held briefly, fully exhaled. Concentrate on the sensation.

Don't worry. While you're doing all this, we'll keep the shit show going, run around in circles, scream, shout, put out the fires in each others' hair, etc. and it will all still be here when/if you get back.

helpfully,
Bright

hunter

(38,317 posts)
68. Turning off the television is a good one.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 04:25 PM
Feb 2020

Even if someone avoids the television news there are political commercials.

And even if you avoid the political commercials the rest of the commercials are designed to leave you agitated and feeling inadequate unless you buy something.

My wife and I quit traditional television a long time ago.

I'm a political junkie but I avoid topics where I'm just banging my head against the wall.

Here on DU I have "Trump" on my trash-by-keyword list.

That eliminates a lot of discussion that would only agitate me.

I like your suggestions.

TygrBright

(20,760 posts)
70. Thanks. I learned 'em the hard way.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 04:51 PM
Feb 2020

Not all of them will work for everyone, but a combo of some of them will be helpful for almost anyone.

The antidote for "toxic connection" is NOT "disconnection". It's increasing the healthy, rewarding connections in your life. Nature, sensory joys, fluffy friends, neighbors and other people generally.

The world is way bigger and time is way longer than my tunnel vision on [whatever] lets me perceive.

As a friend of mine reminds me "When you're head down in a bucket of shit, the bucket of shit becomes your universe."

ruefully,
Bright

Mickju

(1,803 posts)
64. Everything you mentioned I am feeling too.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 04:15 PM
Feb 2020

You are not alone. I have been depressed since November, 2016 with very little relief.

Chakaconcarne

(2,453 posts)
66. I would recommend disconnecting from politics for 30+ days...
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 04:20 PM
Feb 2020

When I've traveled, I've had no access and it was wonderful.

Focus on yourself.

BigDemVoter

(4,150 posts)
69. Oh yes, I completely understand.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 04:42 PM
Feb 2020

We just have to win. That stupid, orange motherfucker has to go down in flames.

jmbar2

(4,889 posts)
71. Thanks for writing - some more thoughts in addition to the great ideas posted by others...
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 04:54 PM
Feb 2020

I agree with the other posters that if you haven't done so already, talk to your Dr. about your depression. Meds might help a lot.

When I am feeling discouraged, I like to think of the civil rights pioneers who laid it on the line every day, for years, defeat after defeat, to make democracy a reality for all Americans. I'd do some reading about how they viewed the long struggle, and how they kept going.

I keep a pic of a bloodied John Lewis, early in his career as a civil rights warrior to remind me that the fight has been much dirtier in the past. They are models for how to keep moving forward in the face of seemingly unbeatable odds.

I'd also like to recommend that you spend time reading the Twitter/blog posts of Teri Kanefield. She is a lawyer, writer and historian who does excellent analysis of what's going on, links to a lot of great research on how to defeat fascism, and maintains a very useful set of recommendations for things you can do to avoid despair. She gets me through a lot of discouraging days.

https://twitter.com/Teri_Kanefield

Finally, I am reminded of a young man in Florida who killed himself in despair when George Bush was awarded the contested election against Al Gore. He missed out seeing Barack Obama become president just four years later! No one could have imagined it at the time.

Our democracy has survived through some very dark times. We have to constantly defend it and finetune it to live up to its promise.

Take a break, refresh, then focus on how you can help us get it back on track.

We need you on our team!

Toorich

(391 posts)
73. Suck it up....
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 05:02 PM
Feb 2020

..... Valley Forge.... Gettysburg...... Iwo Jima...... Normandy....
......Korea.....Vietnam......Desert Storm......Afghanistan.....Iraq war....
etc etc etc etc etc etc etc ----Things could be worse!!!

Things are crappy, but it ain't hopeless, and if good people will Get Out The Vote, get out and vote,
take election day off from work or school and take other people who need assistance to vote. etc etc etc.

We Know what must be done.

We need to suck it up and just do a little everyday for the next nine months. That's really not much
of a sacrifice to help save America.

We must, indeed, all hang together or, most assuredly, we shall all hang separately - B. Franklin


hamsterjill

(15,220 posts)
74. I totally understand and relate.
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 05:04 PM
Feb 2020

I get down and depressed. I get scared and afraid. I'm not as young as I used to be, have fewer options, have a job I don't like, have lost friends over Trump...the list could go on.

BUT...I concentrate on things I do enjoy and where I feel I can make some contribution. I stay busy with animal rescue which is my absolute passion. I force myself to make lunch dates with like minded friends. When that date arrives, I never seem to want to make myself go, but I do - and once I get there and start talking to a friend or friends, I'm always glad that I did make the effort.

Mostly, though, I'm pissed that people are so stupid as to follow Trump and actually be SO DAMN STUPID as to not see what he is. He is a con man, a liar and a traitor. The media needs to call him a liar instead of saying "he doesn't tell the truth". He's selling this country out for his own greed. It is clear as day.

All we can do it vote and encourage any like minded people around us to do the same.

McKim

(2,412 posts)
75. Ideas
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 05:24 PM
Feb 2020

Here are some things that work for me:

.Do something wonderful for someone else.
.Have a bunch of neighbors or friends for brunch. Most people have stopped entertaining and people need someplace happy to go to. Entertain at least once a week. Cooking is a simple activity that makes one happy.
.Swim at an indoor pool, take a walk outside.
.Paint a room in your house like you have always wanted to.
.Take favorite photos and have them printed on canvas for inspiring gifts.
.Clean out the basement listening to classical music.
.Send money to your candidate.
.Doing things puts you forward in life, even if you are sad, you are ahead.
. You are not alone. Doctors waiting rooms are full of people who feel as you do.

pnwest

(3,266 posts)
76. As others have stated, you are not alone. I, too
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 05:56 PM
Feb 2020

am humorless, joyless, agitated, distressed, anxious, and maintain a simmering, low boil rage all the time - and have been thus since the moment I saw realization dawning on Rachel Maddow’s face that trump was going to win on election night. I don’t even laugh at trump memes making fun of him anymore because NONE of this is a laughing matter. This is deadly serious stuff.

I’m also one who has no faith in November. People keep saying to have faith, we’ll vote him out in November. I have zero trust that it will not be utterly corrupted and rigged.

Cary

(11,746 posts)
78. This thread is a lot more fun than I have had here at DU in quite some time
Fri Feb 14, 2020, 07:07 PM
Feb 2020

I think I will confine myself to the lounge. Thank you for the suggestion.

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