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TygrBright

(20,733 posts)
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 02:02 PM Aug 2018

My White Privilege Moment Today

I feel ambiguous and guilty about benefiting from my white privilege in a very specific way today.

Don't get me wrong: I benefit from white privilege EVERY day. It allows me to walk around in a shielded bubble of never having to think about whether a store clerk is eyeing me distrustfully when I stop in to buy a lightbulb, never have to think about whether some ICEhole will ask to see my papers if I'm picking up a kid at school, never have to be conscious of how many of the people in pictures and movies and advertisements do/don't look like me... oh, all kinds of things, every single day.

Like a fish, I don't notice the water I've been breathing all along, except when I try to remind myself. When I try to pay attention. Which, honestly, isn't nearly often enough.

And then today I got my nose rubbed in my white privilege, pretty hard.

I made an illegal left turn. Right in front of a cop car.

Mind you, I didn't realize the left turn I was making was illegal. There was a sign, according to the cop who promptly pulled me over, but I didn't see it. Bad me.

Anyway, I made the left, and the cop car's flashers went on, and I thought, 'WTF? Is that for me?' even as I proceeded to a cutout and pulled over.

And as I was getting my wallet out of my purse, and opening the glove box for my registration, I was thinking, "What would I be feeling right now if my skin was brown?"

(I am so, so very white... Even in the middle of the summer after plenty of work in the garden, no one would ever mistake me for anything but white.)

And I thought, "Instead of being annoyed about possibly being late for my meeting, and about a potential fine for something, and possible points on my license if whatever I did was really horrific, I would be feeling terrified about possibly being yanked from the car, told to lie down on the ground, handcuffed, otherwise brutalized and/or traumatized, possibly arrested, and a whole cascade of other horrors to follow. I'd probably be worrying about that."

Instead, the pleasant-looking, youngish Anglo cop stuck his face toward the window as I lowered it, and asked nicely (with a "please, Ma'am", even) for my license, proof of insurance, and car registration. And let me reach into the glove box for the one, and into my wallet for the other two, and took them from me politely, while he explained that the left turn I'd just made was illegal.

And that there was a sign. And that it was illegal because it's unsafe to make a left turn there because cross-traffic blah-blah and signal blah-blah, and would I please remain in the car in the driver's seat for a 'few minutes'.

To which I nodded, of course. And he walked back to his car.

And I took out my cell phone to tell one of the people I had a meeting scheduled with, that I might be a few minutes late.

And while I was doing that, I thought, "If my skin was brown, would I reach for my cell phone, and hold it up where the cop could see it, and make this call?"

And I thought, "Fuck, no, I WOULD NOT. I would sit still like a mousie with my hands both on the wheel and pray like hell that the cop isn't in a prove-something mood today."

I finished my call, and put the phone away, and after another minute or two, the nice young white cop approached my window again, and told me he was issuing me a 'written warning', which would not involve a fine or a court appearance, and would I sign here, please?

And I thought, for just a moment I thought, about asking the nice young white cop, "Officer, if my skin were brown, would I be getting an actual ticket this time? Or worse?"

But of course, I didn't. #NotAllCops blah-blah and besides I'm chickenshit. I admit it. I chickened on that.

So I thanked the officer nicely, and signed where he pointed, and accepted my copy of the warning and my license and insurance certification and car registration back from him. And promised to drive safely and pay better attention to signs, yes, officer.

And while the officer went back to his car I put the documentation away and folded up the warning and put it away and started my car, and signaled to pull out, and carefully went on my way, driving as safely as I could for the whole rest of my journey.

And I wasn't even late to my meeting.

Voila'! WHITE PRIVILEGE SAVES THE DAY!

For me.

Because I'm white.

And I'm feeling so damned ambivalent right now. Of course I'm glad that I, personally, had no negative effects from the encounter.

But I'm sitting here wondering where I'd be, now, at this moment, if my skin were brown. Late for my meeting? Worrying about paying my fine and/or possible points on my license? In a holding cell?

In the fucking morgue?

White privilege sucks. Because I have it, that means lots of my neighbors and friends DON'T have it. They have to live with these calculations and thoughts every single day, and I hate that.

I wish it hadn't been white privilege that made my little encounter so harmless. I wish it were just the way things are for everyone.

I'll stay aware of how and why I benefit as I did today. And I'll do my best to just make it the way things are for everyone, in every way I can.

regretfully,
Bright

34 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
My White Privilege Moment Today (Original Post) TygrBright Aug 2018 OP
Kick dalton99a Aug 2018 #1
1988 zipplewrath Aug 2018 #3
Just this morning I was running late to get to work sdfernando Aug 2018 #9
Gotta share my similar experience, but slightly different outcome True Dough Aug 2018 #2
Yes, I also benefited from a bass-ackwards kind of misogyny and ageism today. TygrBright Aug 2018 #5
I should have added True Dough Aug 2018 #10
There is the petite, pale female privilege that... moriah Aug 2018 #13
Same type story KatyMan Aug 2018 #4
Same here. Aristus Aug 2018 #6
Cripes, they don't even try to pretend, do they... n/t TygrBright Aug 2018 #7
Nope. Bastards. Aristus Aug 2018 #8
Agree. Either enforce the laws for everyone or acknowledge that they are selective punishments. erronis Aug 2018 #15
Very insightful post, TygrBright.. Permanut Aug 2018 #11
Been there, done that. bluescribbler Aug 2018 #12
It is amazing what people of certain statuses take for granted. Blue_true Aug 2018 #14
To be fair, this is my experience, too, for the most part. I'm white, but mistaken for Hispanic... Honeycombe8 Aug 2018 #16
I'm white Delarage Aug 2018 #22
I regret selling my old car. Honeycombe8 Aug 2018 #23
I find that too Raine Aug 2018 #26
K&R geardaddy Aug 2018 #17
That was brilliant LittleGirl Aug 2018 #18
Reminds me of the old Stephen Colbert show Ginger42 Aug 2018 #19
Hah! Hadn't heard that one. Stephen has some of the best writers. n/t TygrBright Aug 2018 #20
In my profession, I do things every day... Ferrets are Cool Aug 2018 #21
I benefit from Older White Lady Privilege. PoindexterOglethorpe Aug 2018 #24
Mahalo for your poignant and Cha Aug 2018 #25
At least we are thinking about it now get the red out Aug 2018 #27
Been aware of this aspect of my white privilege since I was a stupid teenager vi5 Aug 2018 #28
I have become hyper-aware of this aspect of my white privilege over the last year. Nitram Aug 2018 #29
White Privilege exists.... quickesst Aug 2018 #30
She is/was aware of the possibility her treatment might have been different if she were black bobbieinok Aug 2018 #32
Her words..... quickesst Aug 2018 #33
I enjoy my white privilege quite a bit from time to time Victor_c3 Aug 2018 #31
That's an incredible burden fescuerescue Aug 2018 #34

dalton99a

(81,073 posts)
1. Kick
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 02:06 PM
Aug 2018

My neighbor was pulled over for doing 80 in a 55 zone and got a written warning. His young black male employee did the same thing at the same location a month later and was arrested on a reckless driving charge.

zipplewrath

(16,646 posts)
3. 1988
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 02:33 PM
Aug 2018

An AA male and I both worked at the same place. Both drove in on the same road. Both drove RX-7 sports cars. Both were speeding on the same day, in the same place. According to him he was actually going slower that I generally did. I blew by the radar and thought "uh oh". He got pulled over about 10 minutes later. Also got pulled out of the car and frisked. Asked to search the trunk.

I asked him "what did you do?"

He gave me a look like I was and idiot and said "I don't have to DO anything".

sdfernando

(4,897 posts)
9. Just this morning I was running late to get to work
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 02:46 PM
Aug 2018

I was doing 80 (cruise control) on the freeway (65 speed limit). No one immediately in front of me and not driving recklessly, just staying in the lane doing 80. Cars in other lanes were not that much slower than me, maybe 70s & 75s. Anyway, I glance over and there is a CHP Car right next to me all of the sudden. I turned off the cruise control and slowed down, the COP car was going faster than me even at 80. Didn't pull me over or anything and he/she moved over to exit the freeway. I went on my merry way. I'm not white, pretty brown really, but maybe my gray hairs had some benefit....and this is California, everyone drives fast here.

I'm glad I didn't get a ticket. Easily could have. Maybe the CHiP was a fellow Latino? Couldn't really tell as I didn't look that closely.

Anyway, glad I live in a culturally diverse state/city!

True Dough

(17,096 posts)
2. Gotta share my similar experience, but slightly different outcome
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 02:31 PM
Aug 2018

I'm also white. Many years ago when I was a young man (early 20s), I was driving to a two-day first aid course in a part of the city that I wasn't familiar with. I approached an intersection needing to turn left to get to the building where the course was being held. There were three teenagers standing on the street corner, at the crosswalk, chatting among themselves. Their actions, and whether they were planning to cross the street, was my foremost concern. After realizing they weren't going anywhere, I signalled and made my left-hand turn.

I immediately encountered flashing red and blue lights from the police car parked behind the hedges. The cop gestured for me to pull over.

"Did you not see the no left turn sign back at that intersection?" he asked.

"No, sir. I didn't. I'm not from this part of the city and I was watching those teenagers standing by the crosswalk back there," I replied. Having been raised by a father who was a police officer, I showed complete deference to them as authority figures at that point in my life.

He asked for my driver's license, registration and insurance and went back to his police car.

I waited several minutes and he returned. He handed my me documents and a ticket. He said, "Congratulations. These tickets used to be $60 but they went up to $80 as of today and you're the first one to receive one."

Not a word of a lie. I was courteous and explained why I made the mistake, but I guess because I was a young male, I wasn't going to be cut any slack.

The next day, I approached the building from a different direction and pulled into the parking lot. As I got out of my car, I saw the police car lights flash. I looked up and there was that same cop, positioned in the same location. I watched him approach the car he pulled over and it was a fellow participant in the first aid course I was taking.

I waited for her to come into the building and then I went over to her, a white woman in her early 40s.

"Geez, that police officer is a bit of a jerk isn't he" I said.

"Oh no," she said. "He was very nice. He left me off with a warning."

So there you have it. Not all white folk get away with everything, of course. And there are jerks in every profession, all walks of life.

Never had a gun pulled on me though. And I don't downplay the seriousness of the prejudice African Americans face at the hands of many law enforcement officers.

TygrBright

(20,733 posts)
5. Yes, I also benefited from a bass-ackwards kind of misogyny and ageism today.
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 02:39 PM
Aug 2018

Being of the Virtually Invisible class of hominids (female homo sapiens >60 years of age) I am also in the "least threatening" category for all kinds of LE processes, unless they're engaged in one of those aggressive "we have to demonstrate we do this to ANYBODY" modes.

Which is why back when I did much more traveling, I got pulled out of the security line for more detailed search exactly ONE TIME, and even then it was so obviously pro-forma it would have been ludicrous if it wasn't enraging.

Being Virtually Invisible isn't fun, but it does have a few small compensations and that's one of them.

appreciatively,
Bright

True Dough

(17,096 posts)
10. I should have added
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 02:50 PM
Aug 2018

that to this day, almost 25 years later, I have not received a single driving infraction! It's not that I haven't broken the law (I've climbed over the speed limit a bit more than intended many a time), but I've just never been caught or pulled over.

moriah

(8,311 posts)
13. There is the petite, pale female privilege that...
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 03:08 PM
Aug 2018

... happens partly because those three things affect perception of threat. My encounters with LE have all been when I was younger, and were mostly while I was a passenger while (white) male cohort was speeding. During that time in my life I nearly always had marijuana on me if I was travelling not to/for work -- a one-hitter, though I never smoked *in* vehicles. Never once was asked for permission to search.

The two times I've been pulled over when driving myself were both during my move from New York to Arkansas, both in Tennessee. (Damn long state.) The first time was for 23 mph over. I'm sure the fact it was evident I had all my worldly possessions in that car, including my cat, that made him not want to process an arrest for reckless driving or search. There's an inconvenience factor for them there. And I admitted that I was trying to cut time off the trip. I certainly didn't get off with a warning, nor did I deserve to. But I didn't get arrested or searched. And yes, I had my personal paraphernalia in all my crap.

Would I have gotten the same consideration had I been male? Not where my only pigment is in the form of freckles? Would he have taken the time to correlate my accent, my tags, and how everything backed up my story? Or would he have seen a threat? I know I wouldn't have been speeding through TN in the middle of the night WITHOUT my pale petite female privilege, I'll put it like that. Let alone that damn fast.

KatyMan

(4,147 posts)
4. Same type story
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 02:37 PM
Aug 2018

I was driving down a road near our house; it's a big road, you'd expect the speed limit to be 45 or so, but it's 35. I was in my Mustang (2010) going 55, got pulled over, and the sheriff just told me to slow down. I suspect if I wasn't white he would've been questioning if it was even my car, let along getting let off without a ticket.

Aristus

(66,096 posts)
6. Same here.
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 02:39 PM
Aug 2018

A few years ago, I was pulled over for driving 50mph in a 35-zone. I'm white, but when the officer let me off with a warning, he said it was because I was driving a nice car.

I don't know which would have been worse; his telling me it was because I was white, or the possible euphemism "nice car" = "white".

Aristus

(66,096 posts)
8. Nope. Bastards.
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 02:45 PM
Aug 2018

I would almost rather have had a ticket than be let off with what was essentially: "You're white; I'm sure you meant no harm driving 50 in a 35, sir."

erronis

(14,955 posts)
15. Agree. Either enforce the laws for everyone or acknowledge that they are selective punishments.
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 04:00 PM
Aug 2018

What a broken system we have.

In our system's defense, I doubt any grouping of humans (or other species) are all that fair. Lots of books written about this.

Permanut

(5,439 posts)
11. Very insightful post, TygrBright..
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 03:07 PM
Aug 2018

Old white male here, beneficiary many many times of white privilege. It's impossible for us to really walk a mile in someone else's shoes, especially someone not in the white privilege group; but you have made a valiant effort to illuminate the differences we see, and don't see every day.

I was raised in a home where racism truly did not exist; no one in my family cared what color anyone else was. I'm very fortunate to have that in my background, but I was also not aware then about what white privilege is, or that I was a beneficiary.

Great post.

bluescribbler

(2,105 posts)
12. Been there, done that.
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 03:08 PM
Aug 2018

I've had similar encounters with police and they were unfailingly polite to me. And even when I did get a ticket, they were still polite about it. And as I drive away, I always think, "Would that have turned out like this if my skin were brown?" I think I know the answer, and I don't like it one bit.

Blue_true

(31,261 posts)
14. It is amazing what people of certain statuses take for granted.
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 03:40 PM
Aug 2018

Yesterday, a respondent to a post that I made caused me to realize that not only is there White privilege in America, there is also Straight privilege. In reading the post, I could not imagine what I would do if subjected to the treatment that was an everyday citcumstance for the respondent. People can't just take their privilege of being a member of an accepted group and look the other way when someone who is not is discriminated against or called names, we must confront the discriminators and block their actions or intentions, even if they are family.

Honeycombe8

(37,648 posts)
16. To be fair, this is my experience, too, for the most part. I'm white, but mistaken for Hispanic...
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 04:29 PM
Aug 2018

I'm mistaken for Hispanic in a city with a high Spanish population. I'm mistaken for Italian in NY's Italian section. People will sometimes speak Spanish or Italian to me. I have medium olive skin, dark to med brown hair, dark brown eyes. I am actually almost entirely of French heritage with a splash of Scot-Irish. I have no doubt that if I were in an area of Native Americans, I'd be mistaken for that.

But this is my experience. The cops in Dallas, with a high Spanish population and large illegal population, probably would assume I'm all or part Hispanic, as some other people there did. The cops were nothing but polite to me...as I was to them. I got stopped several times...all white cops, except one was Af. American. I was always nice, produced license & explanation, readily admitted guilt if I was guilty. Expressed shock & dismay once when he told me my tags were expired (I'd just moved & missed getting the notice).

Part of it has to do with how you react to them. And your age. My best friend is black. She lives in Dallas. She has never been treated poorly by cops, she says. She treats people respectfully (most of the time...but you don't want to get in her face..lol...she's nobody's fool).

So that's my experience. People generally treat you however you treat them, I've found. Not always. But usually. I think it may also be likely that females are treated better than males, possibly because we are less of a threat, or possibly because we just behave better in the face of authority.

Also to be fair, my brother, who is never mistaken for anything but white, would have issues with any cop who stops him, because he doesn't like authority, or cops, and has an attitude. He's not the sort to ever admit he was in the wrong. He has been banned from a number of business establishments here.

Delarage

(2,182 posts)
22. I'm white
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 08:34 PM
Aug 2018

But I've gotten my fair share of tickets--and snippy cops--although I do live in a section of Delaware notorious for speed traps. Even when I was speeding or whatever, I feel randomly selected (which annoys me) and maybe my annoyance comes through, even though I try to be as respectful as possible. I drive a crappy car with most of the windows tinted, so maybe that makes me a target. I bought the car used and it's lasted forever.

Honeycombe8

(37,648 posts)
23. I regret selling my old car.
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 09:16 PM
Aug 2018

Wish I could get it back. It was great, for me.

Now I recall that one cop was snippy. School zone, speeding. So I proceeded to express shock & explain....he cut me off. He got me and an older foreign woman behind me. The PROBLEM was that when you turn the corner, there is a school right there. If you're not familiar with that area, as I wasn't, you would know that until you turned. The sign 25mph School Zone was covered by leaves/branches of a tree. So neither I nor the woman behind me could see that until we passed the sign and saw a school...which was when he stopped us. It was a trap, I think. They had to know the sign was covered.

He was abrupt. Not mean...just all business, wouldn't let me speak, here's your ticket.

Raine

(30,540 posts)
26. I find that too
Thu Aug 16, 2018, 04:57 AM
Aug 2018

no matter how annoyed and pissed off Iam about being stopped I'm always friendly and polite. Sometimes I don't get a ticket, sometimes I do but at least I never have had any real trouble with a cop. I think attitude has lots to do with how one is treated. I live in Los Angeles and like you I also look Hispanic even though I'm white I have dark hair and eyes (the Irish in me, haha).

LittleGirl

(8,261 posts)
18. That was brilliant
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 05:06 PM
Aug 2018

thank you for sharing that. It really gave me the feels. you expressed what I could not.
well done!

Ginger42

(59 posts)
19. Reminds me of the old Stephen Colbert show
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 05:36 PM
Aug 2018

"I don't see color. People tell me I'm white, and I believe them because policemen call me 'sir.'"

Ferrets are Cool

(21,063 posts)
21. In my profession, I do things every day...
Wed Aug 15, 2018, 07:52 PM
Aug 2018

WHICH ARE COMPLETELY LEGAL, which make my mind go to the same place yours did today. I ask myself every day, would someone be calling the cops on me right this minute if I were not white.....and the answer always comes back, YES. I want to live in a world where everyone is equal. Unfortunately, that will not happen in my lifetime.

PoindexterOglethorpe

(25,750 posts)
24. I benefit from Older White Lady Privilege.
Thu Aug 16, 2018, 03:57 AM
Aug 2018

I'll be 70 next week, and I basically look my age.

I can count on the fingers of one hand the tickets I've gotten since I started driving. The last one was about 13 or 14 years ago when I was stopped for speeding, which I deserved. The details aren't important. But it was in Kansas, which might be important, but only in the light of where I live now.

These days I live in New Mexico, and even though I'm obviously not Hispanic, there is such a strong culture of respect for mothers and grandmothers, that I benefit. Every other year or so I'm stopped for some infraction. I didn't stop at the stop sign properly (I always think I have, but I'm not about to dispute the cop on this) or some such. Invariably I get a warning. I guess I'm yet to be stopped by the officer willing to ticket mom or grandma.

The last time I was stopped was about three years ago, on a route between New Mexico and Arizona I've driven quite a few times. I knew that the speed limit was rising from 35 to 60 in the next mile, so I speeded up sooner than I should have. Silly me. There was a police officer who turned on his lights, and when I pulled over and he got out I thought for sure I'd get a ticket, as it was an older cop, one to whom I wasn't going to look like mom, let alone grandma. Nope. He took my license, noted I was driving back home to Santa Fe (this was the Sunday after Thanksgiving) and just gave me a warning.

Perhaps the lesson here is twofold. Perhaps threefold. Not only do I benefit from White Privilege, but I also benefit from Older Lady Privilege. And in a state that is largely Hispanic, I am not discriminated against for being white. Which quite frankly astounds me, but I think that's because this state simply has no White/Hispanic divide. Lucky me. And it's among the reasons I love living here.

But I try never to forget that I am privileged. When my sons were first driving I frequently told them that they'd be ticketed for infractions I'd never even get stopped for. Once, when my younger son was in college, he started asking me some strange questions (and I honestly can no longer remember what those questions were) that finally led me to ask him what the hell was going on. Turned out he'd gotten a speeding ticket, and I think he was afraid to tell me for fear I'd go all judgmental and pure on him. Hah! EVERYONE gets a speeding ticket now and then, I told him (even though I've never actually gotten a speeding ticket myself). What's the fine? How much money do you need? Indeed, he got a ticket in circumstances where I'd have only gotten a warning, and I recognized that.

Even so, I know that because my sons are white, even if they get a ticket, they're likely not going to have anything worse happen than the traffic stop and the ticket, just because of the color of their skin. I cannot imagine what it's like to be the parent of a darker skinned child, and to spend time in fear of what can happen just because of that darker skin.

Cha

(295,929 posts)
25. Mahalo for your poignant and
Thu Aug 16, 2018, 04:56 AM
Aug 2018

emotional filled experience with the policeman, Tygr.. And, Thank You for the vivid reminder of how we as White people don't have to worry about our very lives when stopped by the police.





get the red out

(13,459 posts)
27. At least we are thinking about it now
Thu Aug 16, 2018, 05:09 AM
Aug 2018

I have always known about white privilege, (at least since college when an African American student in my dorm told me about being accused of shoplifting at the store on the military base where her family lived because her dad was an army officer). But I didn't start thinking "what if it was me?" for a long time, I hate that I didn't. Every white person needs to think of that, what might happen to me if I was a person of color in X situation?

 

vi5

(13,305 posts)
28. Been aware of this aspect of my white privilege since I was a stupid teenager
Thu Aug 16, 2018, 08:20 AM
Aug 2018

I was a punk kid in the 80's. Which means I dressed like a casting call for "warning" characters in an after school special. Dyed hair cut in freakish ways. Unnecessary combat boots. Lots of black t-shirts with offensive band names and sayings on them. Lots of leather jackets and accoutrements. And always a scowl on my face and a ready smart-assed remark.

I don't regret it nor am I saying kids shouldn't dress rebelliously. It's more by way of this particular subject and antidote.

Not surprisingly, I got hassled a lot by cops. Some of the times rightfully so, other times not so much and likely just because of how I looked and the crowd I hung out with.

One particular time I was clearly incensed by my treatment and was relaying the story of this injustice to my parents (who their credit, despite being nerdy, straight laced children of the 50's/60's were very patient and tolerant with this phase of my life). My mom said to me "Look, all of this may be unfair and you probably are getting judged on your appearance. But know this: You can take off those clothes any time you want. You can cut your hair any time you want. You can start saying "Yes sir and no sir" to the police any time you want. And all of this hassle that you complain about and this treatment from people in positions of authority will likely go away, or go mostly away. Now imagine this treatment was because of your skin color. Or your gender. Or who you loved. And you couldn't change that. No matter how hard you tried or no matter how hard you wanted to. You would be forced to spend your whole life with this injustice looking over your shoulder and with this threat of hassle."

It was at that moment and every day since then that I've been fully aware of the things I DON'T have to worry about because of my skin color (and as a male, my gender). I'm not saying it made me change over night into some short haired, golf shirt and khaki wearing preppy. Hell, much to my wife's chagrin I still dress like I'm out of step (at least compared to other 48 year old white dudes). But that lecture from my mom sticks in my mind to this day, and I try to live every day appreciative of that fact and try to work to make sure all people get treated that fairly, and fighting the injustices that prevent that. I wish I could say I was always successful, but I'm human. I'd just like to think I have more better days where I remember than bad days where I forget.

Nitram

(22,671 posts)
29. I have become hyper-aware of this aspect of my white privilege over the last year.
Thu Aug 16, 2018, 08:59 AM
Aug 2018

All I have to do is BE WHITE, be polite, and cops are polite in return.

quickesst

(6,280 posts)
30. White Privilege exists....
Thu Aug 16, 2018, 09:45 AM
Aug 2018

....... And most people acknowledge that, but, here is my problem with your particular experience. You offer absolutely no proof that you were treated the way you were because you were white, and he was a nice, youngish Anglo. You also have no proof that this young anglo policeman would have treated a woman of color any differently than he did with you. Your entire experience and opinion is based 100% on assumption. You assume you got a break because you were white, and you assumed because he was an Anglo policeman that he would have treated a person of color differently. There is a possibility that this was the case. There is also the possibility this was not the case. Imagine your scenario with the only change being the color of your skin. Dressed for a meeting, driving your car, presenting your license and registration immediately. Do you still think that this nice young Anglo policeman would have treated you with any less respect, or do you assume that he would?

bobbieinok

(12,858 posts)
32. She is/was aware of the possibility her treatment might have been different if she were black
Thu Aug 16, 2018, 12:13 PM
Aug 2018

She is AWARE that her whiteness increases the chance of a positive outcome. She is NOT oblivious to the reality of a possible different outcome if she were black.

ALL whites should by now be aware of their privivilege. She is simply relaying her experience and her awareness.

quickesst

(6,280 posts)
33. Her words.....
Fri Aug 17, 2018, 12:49 AM
Aug 2018

"I wish it hadn't been white privilege that made my little encounter so harmless. I wish it were just the way things are for everyone."...... Stated emphatically that she believes it was a fact that it was her white privilege that made her little encounter so harmless. I was actually waiting for your post when I hit the reply button, not your post in particular, but one exactly like it from whoever decided to reply first. Just happened to be you. She and everyone who agreed 100% with her OP decided to prejudge the young officer because he was "anglo", and only treating her with respect because she was white. If you are not getting what I'm trying to say, then you probably never will.

Victor_c3

(3,557 posts)
31. I enjoy my white privilege quite a bit from time to time
Thu Aug 16, 2018, 10:09 AM
Aug 2018

To top that, I’m male, and I’m approaching middle aged (I’m 38). And, as if things weren’t already in my favor enough, I’m also halfway attractive and in decent shape. Good looks and not being fat helps as well.

The other week, for shits and giggles, I went in to a Porsche dealer. I’ve been daydreaming about buying an old 911 and I certainly can’t afford a new Porsche, but the guys at the dealer didn’t even give me a second thought and put in a new 911 Turbo (nearly a $200,000 car) and took me out for a test drive. They didn’t run my credit or even look at my drivers license. I was instantly taken seriously and given a free cappuccino from their cafe to drink while I parused the cars in their showroom.

Perhaps a well dressed black man my age would have gotten the same treatment, but I don’t know. I just know that things are easy for me.

I’m aware of my privalege from time to time, but honestly I’m mostly oblivious to it. The only thing I can do about it is extend the same “benefit of doubt” to everyone regardless of gender and race - which I do.

fescuerescue

(4,448 posts)
34. That's an incredible burden
Fri Aug 17, 2018, 02:04 AM
Aug 2018

you have my sympathy.

I'm thankful to be born a person of color and not have to endure what you go through everyday.

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