Trump Suffering Horrible Indigestion After Eating Fresh, Well-Prepared State Dinner Meal

[geardaddy]

https://politics.theonion.com/trump-suffering-horrible-indigestion-after-eating-fresh-1825537306

WASHINGTON—Experiencing searing abdominal pain brought on by the healthy fare, President Trump reportedly suffered horrible indigestion Wednesday, the morning after he ate a fresh, well-prepared meal at his first state dinner. “Ugh, my God—why the hell did I eat all that garbage last night?” said the wincing, sweating president, remembering the perfectly cooked rack of spring lamb, fresh vegetables from the White House garden, and other nutritious items that had not been deep-fried, smothered in gravy or cheese, or processed in any way. “That was a huge mistake. What was I thinking? Aw, Christ, I think I’m gonna be sick.” At press time, sources confirmed Trump’s stomach had settled and he was feeling better after eating a light lunch of two Big Macs, two Filet-O-Fish sandwiches, and a large chocolate shake.

[Angry Dragon]

1. The Onion has to go way out there

[RockRaven]

2. When ridiculous satire quotes real life, you know you are in GOP territory

Whether it's Tina Fey quoting Palin directly for an entire sketch on SNL or The Onion using Trump's McDonalds standard order...

[MontanaMama]

3. It was a beautiful chocolate shake however...

I'm betting Dotard McFatpants would have to run for the bathroom if he ate any fresh veggies. He couldn't handle it.

[no_hypocrisy]

4. "They're trying to kill me!" Trump sputtered . . . . .